Sometimes there are people at school who always seem to want to fight. In fact, maybe you are one of those people who always lose their temper. However, getting into a physical fight isn't a great way to solve problems. You could get hurt or cause trouble. Fortunately, there are several things you can do to avoid fights at school.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Dealing with Bad Situations
Step 1. Stay calm
If you are in a tense situation, the best thing you can do is try to defuse the situation. To reduce tension, you must remain calm. If you stay calm, the people around you can be calm too.
- Take a deep breath. If you're feeling tense and want to fight, focus on your breathing. Inhale and exhale slowly.
- Take some time to think. If someone taunts you in the hallway, your impulses may be piqued.
- Instead, you should quit. Tell yourself, “If I get into a fight, someone will get hurt and get into trouble. I'd better stay calm."
- Make it a habit to take deep breaths and think deeply before speaking or acting. Your actions may also calm other people down.
Step 2. Change the focus
One good way to defuse a dangerous situation is to turn your attention to something else. For example, if someone pushes you in the cafeteria, don't respond with violence. Instead, find a way to distract yourself.
- Try saying something like, “Uh, the bell has rung, hasn't it? So I had to ignore you and go to class.”
- You can also change the focus 180 degrees. If someone bumps into you aggressively on your way to class, turn to your friend and say, "You watched the basketball game last night, didn't you?"
- Changing focus can help reduce tension. By focusing on something else, you reduce the chances of an argument starting.
Step 3. Rely on humor
Humor can lighten everyone's mood. If you find yourself in a situation where an argument may arise, try saying something funny. Using humor to reduce tension is an effective way.
- If you show that you're relaxed enough to crack jokes, the person trying to get into a fight may back off. Say something funny to defuse the tension.
- Don't make jokes that can hurt other people's feelings. Instead, try to realize how ironic or funny the situation is.
- Maybe someone mocks you because you study during recess. You can just laugh and say, "It may be boring now, but when I go to a good university, it will be good."
Step 4. Be confident
If you are confident, you will lessen the urge to fight. When you feel confident, you will feel that you can handle difficult situations with maturity. There are many ways to build self-confidence and present it to others.
- Focus on the advantages. If someone makes fun of your outfit, just think, "At least I'm good at soccer."
- Practice handling difficult situations. Take some time to think about how you would react if you were invited to a fight.
- If you've practiced your responses, you'll feel more confident. For example, you could practice saying something like, "I have more important things to do than fight."
Step 5. Overcome insults
Not all fights are physical. Someone may get you into a fight using hurtful words. There are several ways you can effectively deal with verbal aggression.
- One way to deal with bullies is to ignore them. If someone taunts you, just walk away from them.
- Another tactic is to stay calm. Try saying, "You know, no, there's no reason for me to keep talking to you if you keep doing this."
- Make it clear that you don't want to fight. If you don't respond to the situation, chances are, the situation will subside on its own.
Method 2 of 3: Avoiding Potential Conflicts
Step 1. Trust your instincts
Silencing a bad situation is important. However, taking steps to avoid a bad situation is equally important. Spend some time thinking about changes you can make to avoid potential fights.
- Follow instinct. If you are on your way home and see a group of children standing in the corner, you may feel that there will be trouble walking past them.
- Avoid the situation by walking home by a different route. The travel time may be a little longer if you change routes, but you also avoid fighting.
- The same is true when you are at school. If you see a group of children who look suspicious, don't approach them. Use a different route to get to class.
Step 2. Put safety first
You can get hurt if you fight. That's why you should always be aware of how important safety is. It's good to be aware of the things around you.
- Try to travel with friends. If possible, don't walk alone during breaks or during class changes.
- The bully is less likely to approach you if you're with other people. You should also have lunch with friends.
- If you are concerned about your safety, always try to be near an adult. In the cafeteria, sit in a chair close to an adult.
Step 3. Set limits
You can clearly show that other students should respect your personal space. Setting boundaries is a good way to avoid fights. Set clear boundaries that no one should cross.
- If someone bumps into you, try saying, "Could you please walk a little further?" Say it firmly and politely.
- You may have to leave the room and someone is blocking you. You can say, "Please don't get in the way."
- By setting boundaries, you make it clear that you don't want to fight. That's a better option than pushing people out of your way.
Step 4. Use your voice
Your words are the strongest weapon. You can use your voice to avoid potentially dangerous situations. For example, if you see someone fighting, you can use words to defuse the situation.
- Try using logic. Instead of getting physically involved, you can say, "You'll get into trouble if you keep fighting. I know you both don't want to be suspended from the basketball team."
- You also use speech to ask for help. Tell an adult that an argument will occur. It's an option that can help you avoid danger.
- Always try to speak clearly and confidently. You want people to believe what you say.
- You have to be polite. Don't use words to stir up trouble.
- Instead of making fun of someone, try saying, “I know you guys better than this. I don't think you guys want a real fight."
Step 5. Manage your emotions
One of the reasons people fight is that they allow themselves to get carried away with emotions. Quarrels are usually caused by anger, stress, and fear. Learning to control your emotions can prevent you from getting into fights.
- There are several things you can do to manage stress. For example, you can concentrate on the positive things in life.
- You may be stressed because a family member is sick. Instead of focusing on that at school, take time to be grateful that you get to spend time with your friends.
- There are also effective ways to control your anger. For example, you can practice deep breathing techniques. Count to five while breathing in slowly, then count to five while exhaling.
- Talk about your feelings. If you are having troublesome feelings, share them with a friend, parent, or teacher.
Step 6. Take control of your life
Everyone has had a tiring day. Sometimes you feel like getting angry with someone or your patience is running out. Remember that you can choose how you handle such days.
- It's only natural if you have a tiring day. However, you can reduce those times by focusing on the positive things in your life.
- If you realize that you are about to say something mean, take your mind off it. Try saying to yourself, "Okay, now I'm pissed, but I can't wait to play a game later."
- Maybe someone said something hurtful to you at school. You can use the same handling tactics as you would when you are physically invited to a fight.
- Take care of your body. Make sure you get enough exercise and rest. It will help stabilize your mood and help you avoid the urge to fight.
Method 3 of 3: Finding Help
Step 1. Talk to your parents
Other students may get you into a fight. Or you may want to fight with other students. Either way, dealing with aggression can be a very emotional experience. Find people who can support you.
- Parents can help you deal with serious problems. Ask them if you can tell a story.
- Your request must be specific. Say, "Mom, can I tell you about a complicated problem I'm having?"
- You have to be open and honest. Tell the real problem to your parents. Work together to find solutions.
Step 2. Ask the teacher for advice
Teachers are another source of help. If you are close to a teacher, consider asking that teacher for advice. You can ask the teacher to keep your conversation private.
- Share your concerns with the homeroom teacher. For example, you might say, "I've been arguing with Jason lately. I'm afraid we'll get into a real fight."
- You can also talk to the BK teacher. Counseling teachers are trained to help students cope with complex situations.
- Consider talking to an exercise teacher or any extracurricular tutor after school. Any adult who knows you well will likely be able to help you find ways to avoid arguments.
Step 3. Spend time with real friends
Most likely you are busy with school matters, extracurricular activities, and homework. However, don't forget to take the time to hang out. Friends are also a source of help.
- Friends can make you laugh. When you're more relaxed, you're less likely to be provoked into a fight.
- Spend time with sincere people. You and your friends should treat each other well. You should also be honest with each other.
- If you have a problem with a classmate, tell a close friend of yours. Say, "I'm afraid of this. It's like someone wants to get into a fight. Can we sit together for lunch next week?”
Step 4. Use online resources
Middle and high school years can be stressful. As we grow older, we struggle to find positive ways to deal with change. However, remember that there is always someone who can listen to you.
- Use the internet. There are many discussion forums and talk rooms dedicated to helping youth.
- Look for sites that offer advice on fighting bullying. You can learn to avoid bullies and not become bullies.
- Consider visiting a site such as Teenline.org. You can chat, text, reply to email, or talk on the phone with someone who understands what you're dealing with.
Tips
- Confidence is very important.
- Don't worry about what other people think that sees you refusing to fight.
- Ask for help if you are concerned about your safety.