Bulimia is a psychological condition in which sufferers overeat and then force the food out by triggering vomiting, using laxatives, or fasting (emptying the stomach). Although it seems to be related only to food, bulimia is rooted in the sufferer's inability to handle emotional and difficult life situations. You can't force a friend who has bulimia to change, but you can support them. If you suspect a friend of yours has bulimia, you can help by learning more about the condition, talking to them, and learning ways to provide support and care.
Step
Part 1 of 3: Knowing the Signs of Bulimia
Step 1. Realize that bulimia is a mental condition
Although it generally affects teenage girls and young women, both men and women of all ages can suffer from bulimia. The cause of bulimia is thought to be an inability to deal with painful emotions or those that are too heavy to bear.
- Overeating helps people with bulimia calm down. They feel less hungry, unhappy, or lonely. When they overeat, they can consume thousands of calories.
- Emptying the stomach helps people with bulimia feel more in control of their bodies. It may be a way to overcome feelings of helplessness and self-loathing.
- Bulimia is a cycle based on emotional responses, not rational reactions. Just knowing that the behavior is out of control is not enough to change it.
Step 2. Look for signs of overeating
Overeating is usually done quietly when alone. People who have bulimia usually know that their behavior is not normal. He will try to hide his habit of overeating from others, even eating late at night or in secret places that no one else sees.
- Signs of overeating include piles of empty wrappers of high-calorie foods, food disappearing from cupboards and refrigerators, and hidden places to store junk food or cakes.
- Some people who overeat may eat normally when around other people. They may appear to be eating little, or say they are dieting. Abnormal eating behavior may not be easily recognized if the sufferer hides the behavior.
Step 3. Know the signs of emptying your stomach
Usually people with bulimia empty their stomach immediately after eating. If he seems to be going to the bathroom more often than usual, or if you see signs he's vomiting, it may be a sign of emptying his stomach.
- People with bulimia may use mouthwash, breath mints, or cologne to hide the smell of vomit.
- The faucet may be turned on to cover up the sound of vomiting.
- You may also find packaged diuretics or laxatives. Both are used to empty the stomach.
Step 4. Consider whether your friend is exercising hard
Excessive exercise despite bad weather, injury, or illness may be a method of emptying the stomach.
- Because it's usually considered "good" and healthy, it can be difficult to spot signs of bulimia from exercise. However, excessive exercise in order to empty the stomach is just as harmful to health as any other method.
- If he's getting isolated from his friends because he has to work out, maybe he's trying to empty his stomach that way. He may not go to work or school in favor of exercise, prioritizing exercise over family, social life, or his own health and safety. He may feel guilty when he doesn't exercise, and exercise alone to avoid being noticed or noticed by others.
- If your friend is showing these signs of compulsive exercise, it's also possible that she's addicted to exercise.
Step 5. Notice if your friend seems obsessed with food
He may not eat in public at all, or seem too focused on talking and thinking about food. He may be very interested in counting calories, special diets, or managing food intake.
- He may create excuses to avoid eating with other people, such as saying that he is not hungry, has eaten, or is not feeling well.
- When eating, he may be very anxious about what other people think of his food. He may be very sensitive.
Step 6. Notice the change in its appearance
People with bulimia may experience drastic weight loss or gain in a short period of time. He may become very critical of his own appearance and have a distorted perception of his body. You may notice her wearing loose-fitting clothes to hide her figure from others.
- People with bulimia may think they are a bit overweight, even though they are not.
- Watch for yellow teeth (a sign of emptying the stomach) because stomach acid affects tooth enamel.
Step 7. Look for other physical changes
America's National Institute of Mental Health lists the following as physical manifestations of bulimia: brittle nails and hair; slow breathing and pulse; dry and yellowish skin; growth of downy hair all over the body; always feeling cold, always feeling tired.
- Physical signs that are less visible to observers include anemia, muscle weakness, and muscle wasting. People who suffer from bulimia also experience severe constipation.
- Osteopenia or osteoporosis (bone loss) is commonly associated with bulimia.
Part 2 of 3: Talking To Him
Step 1. Find a quiet and private place to be alone
People with eating disorders are usually very shy. He may be defensive, or deny having a problem. You have to be sensitive to his feelings if you want to talk to him.
- Share a memory of a particular incident that worried you.
- Express your concerns in a non-judgmental tone, and listen to whatever he may have to say respectfully and openly.
- Be prepared to speak more than once. Because there's so much shame associated with eating disorders, it's unlikely that your friend will admit the problem right away.
Step 2. Don't focus on her appearance or eating habits
Instead talk about your friendships and relationships. For example, if you notice that he is alone more often than not, tell him that you miss him at social gatherings instead of accusing him of secretly overeating. Remind him that you care about him.
- Remind him that you are concerned about his health.
- Don't compliment or criticize her appearance. No matter how good your intentions, praise or criticism will only trigger a negative response in the person with the eating disorder.
Step 3. Encourage him to seek help
Let them know that a support group, professional counselor, or emotional care professional may be able to help. Prepare a list of counselors in your area and remind them that help is an option.
- Never force him to seek help. The decision must come from the person with the eating disorder himself.
- Remember that bulimia is basically a person's emotional response to feeling out of control.
- If she refuses to seek help, ask if she would consider regular checkups just to make sure there are no serious medical problems.
Step 4. Don't try to tell the bulimic person to stop overeating and empty the stomach
If you try to tell him to stop, he will take it as your attempt to control him. It may be difficult for you to let him continue the harmful habit, but trying to force him to stop will only cause more trouble.
- Fighting over food is usually an unpleasant outcome.
- Focus on what he may be experiencing emotionally. For example, talk about the relationship between eating and stress. You might say, “I noticed that you seem to be alone more often when you're stressed. What stresses you out?
Step 5. Talk to people who can help you
If your friend doesn't acknowledge the problem, you can't force it. Each person must decide for himself whether he wants to overcome bulimia or not. Talk to others about what you can do to support them.
- If there is a support group for friends and family with eating disorders, see if that can help you.
- Talking to people who have recovered from an eating disorder can help you learn a few things about the condition.
- A counselor may be able to help you better understand what you can do for your friend, and what she should do for herself.
Part 3 of 3: Providing Attention and Support
Step 1. Remind him that you care about him
Your concern should be based on a friendly relationship, not because he or she is wrong or pathetic. Don't demand immediate progress or change his behavior.
- He needs help, encouragement, and a good attitude. Pour it all out to him.
- Remember that his eating disorder has nothing to do with you or your friendship.
Step 2. Help her learn how to treat bulimia
Treatment options include therapy, nutritional counseling, support groups, and rehabilitation. The best treatment for each individual varies, but is usually a combination of several types of treatment. For example, some people have therapy sessions every two weeks combined with nutritional counseling and support groups on a weekly basis. Or, he may be better suited to rehabilitation if he has a medical problem.
- Family therapy is also recommended to overcome the impact of eating disorders that may be felt by the whole family.
- The goal of bulimia treatment is to address both the physical and psychological aspects of the condition. Learning to forge healthier relationships with food and better ways to deal with stress and adversity is part of bulimia treatment.
Step 3. Be patient
Treatment of eating disorders takes time. You must learn to pay attention to your own needs, even while trying to help them. Don't get so involved in caring for your friends that you don't have time to take care of yourself.
- Find time for relaxation, meditation, and doing activities you enjoy.
- If you can't take care of yourself, you won't be of any use to your friends. If you find it difficult to take care of yourself, consider getting away for a while.
