When relationships don't go smoothly, distancing yourself for a while is sometimes the best option for dealing with problems. However, do not let the relationship hang by avoiding because this method is not a permanent solution. If you absolutely must avoid someone, do the following.
Step
Part 1 of 3: Breaking Up with a Negative Person
Step 1. Consider whether you need to disconnect
If the person you're trying to avoid isn't too intrusive and doesn't have a major impact on your quality of life, use simple ways to solve the problem.
For example: if you want to distance yourself from an annoying person, don't reply to texts or take phone calls. Refuse if he asks you to meet at a certain place and don't chat anymore as usual so he will immediately pick up on the hint
Step 2. Tell him that you no longer want to interact with him
This is a very unpleasant conversation and will usually hurt the feelings of the interlocutor. Be as calm as possible when you make this decision. Don't blame or be angry with him. You just need to explain why and then leave so you don't have a long argument with him. If this is the decision you make, be as prepared as possible before speaking.
- You have the right to tell someone you don't want to see them again, but they may not necessarily accept your decision.
- Know that people tend to resist decisions like this. However, if you've decided you don't want to have anything to do with him anymore, show respect by sharing this decision personally, don't keep yourself away from it. Explain that you want to end the relationship or friendship because there is no match. You hope to be friends again in the future, but for now, you don't want to interact with him.
Step 3. Disconnect all lines of communication
Don't keep texting, calling, or seeing her again. After conveying your decision, i.e. breaking the relationship, do as you say. If your attitude is fickle, he will be confused and the process will be more difficult. However, never be rude or show hatred towards him.
Step 4. Consider using legal recourse
If he threatens you or those closest to you, report it to the police to have him arrested. You can ask the court to issue a restraining order so he doesn't come near you again. Use this option only if you really feel threatened and insecure because this method is very extreme.
First, file a claim through your local court and go through the process until a judge makes a ruling on your claim. This method can be a solution to the problem you are facing
Part 2 of 3: Avoiding Negative People
Step 1. Don't come to the place he used to go
Try to find out where he goes often so you don't run into him, such as where he hangs out with his friends, his house, or a place to rest if you go to school with him.
Step 2. Change your daily routine
Avoiding someone may be stressful for both parties, but you don't have to change your whole life. This can be overcome by changing your daily routine a little so that the two of you don't see each other. If you meet frequently at a particular coffee shop, look for another coffee shop for a while.
Step 3. Ignore the person you want to avoid
Don't make eye contact with him as he will approach you and start a conversation. When you see him somewhere, act as if you don't see him. If you cross paths, nod your head and keep walking. You don't need to initiate interaction with him, instead pretend he doesn't exist.
Step 4. Avoid the possibility of meeting him alone
Maybe the two of you will meet often if you work in the same place, for example at work or at school. Make sure you meet him with his other colleagues. Don't stay in the office after hours if he's still working. When you see him at a party, join the crowd. That way, you don't have to meet and interact with them.
Step 5. Prepare an escape plan and execute it
Once he finds out that you don't want to be friends with him anymore, but he still keeps in touch with you, have a plan to get out of it. Instead of getting angry, be polite when he comes over and invites you to talk. However, you have to be honest because you have every right to be honest that you don't want to interact with him anymore.
If he's still talking, find an excuse, for example, “Sorry, I'm going to go now! It's too late, here!"
Part 3 of 3: Living the Life You Want
Step 1. Don't drastically change your life because of other people
To avoid meeting, it never hurts if you adjust your daily routine. However, don't let your life be filled with fear at the thought of meeting him. Don't change your life just because of a troubled relationship.
Don't quit your job or skip college just to avoid someone. Another example: if you know he'll be at the gym at a certain time, come an hour earlier or an hour later
Step 2. Create a comfortable environment
After breaking up with a negative person, don't let them affect your life again. Enjoy life by spending time with positive people. Have fun with friends and be yourself. Do the things you love with fun people.
For example: don't let interactions with negative people change your personality. Be a more qualified person and don't want to be intimidated
Step 3. Forget the past and move on with your life
However, you must free yourself from anger. After some time, he will realize that you don't want to deal with him anymore. Be polite when talking to him, especially if he is a coworker. Only interact as necessary. Once you are able to control your emotions, this person is no longer the source of problems in your life.
Decide if you want to be friends with him again. If you no longer think about this relationship, maybe you can accept it again in your life. However, accepting back the person you love who has hurt you is not easy because you have to wait until the love is completely extinguished. After that, start interacting with him in public activities
Tips
- Make him realize that you don't want to talk to him anymore. If he invites you to chat, say: "Sorry, I have an appointment with Susi at the mall in five minutes."
- If there is violence, take legal action by asking for a restraining order so that he understands that you have broken up.
- Ask a friend to help divert the conversation while he or she is talking to you.
- If he continues to harass you, explain how you feel and why you are avoiding him. Solve problems by speaking the truth.
- Don't interrupt when he's talking. Be a patient listener so that the two of you stay in touch and don't make things worse.
- Be polite and maintain good relations with friends. If you live with an obnoxious or mean person, leave it.
- Never attack other people.
