Building willpower is a skill that can be learned! Start by setting goals and then form good habits to make it easier for you to reach your goals. This article describes how to build determination to achieve long-term goals by overcoming obstacles and increasing motivation.
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Part 1 of 3: Defining Success and Setting Personal Goals
Step 1. Visualize by imagining the future you dream of
Building willpower will be difficult if you don't know what you want to achieve or can't determine whether you have achieved your goal. Determine what success means to you so that you are more motivated to achieve it. This is the first step to building willpower.
- Take about 15 minutes to write in detail what your dream life will be like in the future (1, 5, or 10 years away) in all aspects, for example: work, relationships, health, hobbies, etc. Imagine what the condition of each of these aspects would be if you had achieved success.
- Don't judge yourself or let negative thoughts influence what you want to write. If your goal seems impossible to achieve, that's okay. Just write down all the goals creatively as possible.
Step 2. Define some specific goals
Formulating clear goals is the first step to achieving the success you dream of. Set specific goals for some aspects of life.
- For example: write “I want to have more money” as a goal. After that, set specific targets to achieve them, for example: pass a certification course to qualify to be promoted to manager in the office. On the other hand, maybe you daydream, “I want to go on vacation to Bali with my family” and then set a target of saving IDR 10,000,000 to make it happen.
- Set goals for every aspect of life, for example in the aspects of finance, health, work, relationships, and self-development. However, a particular goal may include several aspects. In the example above, a financial goal (“I want to have more money”) includes a career goal. So you have to set more specific targets for each aspect.
- Prioritize a few goals first so you stay focused and determined to achieve them. Focusing on multiple targets at the same time overwhelms you and makes it difficult to maintain willpower.
Step 3. Determine how to reach the target
After formulating goals and determining specific targets, make a detailed plan to achieve them, namely by thinking about the steps that must be taken. You will have a stronger determination to achieve your goals if you know what to do.
- For example: if your goal is to publish a novel, the steps that must be taken are writing a novel (which still needs to be broken down into several small steps), editing, searching for information about the book publishing industry, choosing a book publisher to send the manuscript to, writing a synopsis and cover letter, send manuscripts to several publishers.
- Determine the steps to achieve the goal in detail so that they can be done one by one. After that, think about whether you have the resources needed to do so. For example: professional editors charge a lot of money so you need to save up first.
Step 4. Set challenging deadlines
Making a schedule for achieving targets is very useful for maintaining determination. Set a deadline for achieving the target (for example: saving IDR 10,000,000) and a deadline for realizing each step to achieve the target.
- For example: it may take you 1 year to save IDR 10,000,000. Then, break down the target into several intermediate targets, for example: saving IDR 2,500,000 in the next three months.
- Set realistic targets, but quite challenging. Deadlines that are too long make it difficult for you to focus on your goals.
Step 5. Prioritize the goals you have set
If you really want to achieve a goal, make that goal the most important thing compared to other aspects of life. This doesn't mean you have to work 24 hours a day. Instead, try to devote enough time to accomplishing it.
For example: prioritizing goals instead of just making a commitment to write a novel every day. Instead, you should devote more time to your daily routine. If you want to write a novel between 6 AM and 8 AM every morning, prioritize that activity no matter what happens after 8 AM. This means you have to set aside time to pursue the daily goals that you have set
Step 6. Be prepared if there are obstacles that hinder the achievement of goals
Perform regular evaluations to compare the future you dream of with your current living conditions. Find out the habits or behaviors that are holding you back from achieving your dreams. Focus on setting targets for overcoming those differences.
For example: if you want to save IDR 10,000,000, but eat at a restaurant every day, change the habit of wasting money so you can save. Savings adds up faster if you cook at home to cut down on eating out at restaurants
Part 2 of 3: Forming Good Habits
Step 1. Get rid of negative thoughts
This method plays a very important role in building determination and achieving goals. Negative thoughts will demotivate you and make you give up easily. On the other hand, positive thinking habits make you more resilient.
Observe negative thoughts directed at yourself and others. For example: if you notice you're saying to yourself, "I'm such a weak person that I can't even do a push up even once," change that thought. Get into the habit of positive thinking by changing the negative inner chatter to, "Right now, I'm not strong enough to do push ups, but I will exercise regularly to be able to do it little by little"
Step 2. Rely on your strengths
Often times, when you get feedback or suggestions for improving yourself, you only focus on the things that need to be improved. There's nothing wrong with this, but try to figure out your strengths and then rely on them so you can maintain the determination needed to achieve your goals.
- Ask friends/coworkers/family members/teachers to tell you what your strengths are (when you show positive aspects of yourself). Find common themes from the feedback given as a reflection of the strength of your personality.
- For example: if people tell you that you are very intelligent, use that intelligence to achieve your goals. Continuing the example above, choose a bank that provides the highest savings interest rate so that you are more motivated to save IDR 10,000,000.
Step 3. Build confidence
Confidence is the ability to believe in yourself no matter how bad things are. When faced with obstacles, confident people feel confident that they can overcome them. This is called determination. Determination means having faith that you can overcome obstacles because you believe in your own abilities, rather than because you've done the same thing.
- To look confident, make it a habit to walk with an upright body, lift your chin, and stand up straight while puffing out your chest and putting your hands on your hips. The more often you do this posture, the more easily your mind will be influenced so that it appears that you are a confident person.
- To feel confident, don't compare yourself to others as this will reduce your self-confidence. To break this habit, wear a rubber band around your wrist and pull it off whenever you notice you're comparing.
Step 4. Be flexible
Flexibility is openness to accept change. Just as a person performs a bending posture without injury when practicing yoga, so should you when you encounter obstacles. The path in life that you are currently on can sometimes seem like it is going in another direction, but remember that your goals and the way to achieve them can also change.
- Get used to being flexible by leaving your comfort zone and doing new things. For that, think about activities you've never done and start looking for new experiences.
- Be flexible by changing your daily routine. If you always drive to and from work or school, start using the bus or bicycle. Also, choose a route you've never traveled or do something spontaneous, for example: stop by for an ice cream or browse a store.
Step 5. Take care of your health
It will be easier for you to build the determination to achieve your goals if your body is always sufficiently energized, rested, and exercised. This method can overcome various complaints, for example: stress and anxiety that make it difficult for you to maintain determination.
- Get in the habit of sleeping at least 8 hours every day. Try to go to bed a few hours before midnight. To make it easier for the body to enter a state of sleep, turn off electronic devices (computers, cell phones, other devices) at least 30 minutes before bedtime.
- Eat lots of vegetables and fruits (especially dark green and brightly colored vegetables because they are more nutritious). Do not eat processed foods that contain lots of sugar and salt because it will trigger drowsiness and depression. Choose a menu that contains carbohydrates, for example: brown rice, oatmeal, and wheat sprouts. Get enough protein by eating eggs, fish, lean meats, etc.
- Exercise for 30 minutes every day. When you exercise, your body produces endorphins, which are chemical compounds that make you feel more energetic and happy. Choose a sport that you enjoy, for example: dancing or long-distance running.
Part 3 of 3: Defending the Will
Step 1. Learn from mistakes
People who have determination do not know the term “fail”. No matter how well you prepare, mistakes will still happen. Oftentimes, mistakes and “failures” are opportunities.
- When faced with a problem, find a different perspective by asking “why”? For example: if you are asked to build a bridge over a river, the question “why” should a bridge be built will open up many possibilities (why do you have to cross the river? what materials are available? etc.) You will be able to see the possibilities by asking yourself this question. alone.
- Alternatively, ask yourself what you learned from "failure". What needs to be changed? What factors lead to “failure”? Is failure as bad as you think?
Step 2. Look for creative solutions
The right way to live a goal-directed life and achieve it is to think of a different way than usual. This is very much needed, especially when you face obstacles because creative solutions sometimes provide paths that have never been thought of.
- Daydreaming is a very useful tool. If you have a problem, take time to daydream and let your mind wander free to think about it. A good time to practice daydreaming is before bedtime, but you can do it at any time.
- Ask yourself a few questions to come up with creative problem solutions. If resources are available, how will you address the problem? If there was no possibility of failure, what would you do? If your financial budget was unlimited, what resources would you use? If you could ask someone for help, who would you choose?
Step 3. Visualize
While it may sound strange, visualization is a very useful technique for building willpower. Get in the habit of visualizing while imagining that you have succeeded in achieving the goals you are striving for.
- The more clearly you envision your goal (with specific images, sounds, smells, and details), the more likely you are to reach your goal.
- For example: to visualize you are promoted at work, imagine you are looking at a larger office space while hearing congratulations from people in the office and you have more money for a vacation with your family.
Step 4. Create a vision board
A vision board is a tangible way to envision goals. Assemble pictures and knick-knacks that keep your life goal-directed and then look at your vision board regularly to restore your willpower so you can keep working towards it.
- Read magazines, newspapers, and use the internet to find inspirational pictures, words, and phrases that work for you. Take advantage of things that represent your goals from various aspects of everyday life, for example: health, relationships, and work.
- Once the vision board has been assembled, place it where it is easily visible. Look at all the things you put together on a vision board like you're doing a short visualization session!
Step 5. Give yourself a gift
Celebrate progress by rewarding yourself regularly. Gifts don't have to be big or expensive, unless you want them to! Take this opportunity to reward yourself for having worked so hard to achieve your goals.
- For example: every time you reach an intermediate goal that supports the achievement of your main goal, treat yourself to a movie or a meal at your favorite restaurant.
- Gifting yourself keeps you focused on your goals and determined to achieve them. However, do not choose a reward that hinders the progress of achieving the goal. If you want to lose weight, you should not choose food as a reward. If you want to save, don't buy gifts using most of your savings (unless what you buy is part of the goal).
Step 6. Rejuvenate with rest
At times, you may feel like you have lost the will to achieve your goals. In this condition, do not cancel the goal, but rest! Taking a break doesn't mean you don't have the willpower anymore, it just means you want to recover and get back to work hard to be more passionate about achieving your dreams.
- You can take long or short breaks, depending on your mental state. If you're experiencing frustration or stress, it's a good idea to take a weekend getaway or travel to relax.
- If you want to take a short break, take advantage of the free time during the day to meet friends or enjoy a hobby.
