The saying that you'll never really be "ready" to have kids is a cliché. However, starting a family is the beginning of a major change you will take in your life, and you should take the time to prepare and plan for it. Thinking of having children? Get started with the first step below.
Step
Part 1 of 3: Prepare Mentally
Step 1. Make a decision
The first step is to decide, independently and for yourself, whether you want to have children. Are you willing to take responsibility for another human being? Are you ready to make the sacrifices necessary to raise a child? Do you really want to be a parent?
Also consider whether you want to have more than one child. Of course, people will change their minds over time. But knowing how many children you want will help you plan for your family effectively
Step 2. Talk to your partner
If you have a partner, you should talk to this person at length about your plans; after all, having a family is something you need to do together. You both need to feel ready to start a family; if not, maybe this isn't the right time.
- Discuss your plans for raising children. What kind of parent will you be? What educational and disciplinary methods will you use? What kind of person do you want your child to be?
- Discuss potentially divisive topics such as religion. If you and your partner have different religious backgrounds, you should try to decide in advance how you will handle the matter. In what religion will you raise your child? What would you teach your child about religion?
Step 3. Think about how you will balance your family and work
Pregnancy and parents will certainly affect your career. Depending on your current job, you may need to consider whether you can balance your career obligations with your family life. If you are planning to return to work after your child is born, consider:
- How will your pregnancy and postpartum recovery affect your career
- Do your type of working hours allow you to be an active and engaged parent.
- Who will look after your children while you are working.
- Can you afford to pay for child care?
Step 4. Consider that parenting will affect your social life
When you have children, your social life will change. It will become more difficult to get out at night, and you may find that you are too tired or too busy with problems at home to try to get out. You may see your friends less often, especially those who have no children. Traveling or traveling will also become more complicated.
Step 5. Be realistic about how your parents will affect your relationship
Parenting will strengthen your bond and strengthen your relationship, but it will also change your time together. Your time and affection should be shared with your spouse and children, and your children will often have to come first: their needs will come first. You have to work harder to make time for romance and sex.
Step 6. Make a “to do” list before getting pregnant
Think about the things you want to do before starting your family, and try to do as many of them as you can while you can. For example, consider:
- Traveling or traveling, especially to exotic and romantic destinations.
- Enjoy parties and nightlife.
- Enjoy luxuries like massages, salon treatments and shopping.
- Achieve health and fitness goals.
- Reach important milestones of career.
Step 7. Educate yourself about pregnancy and parenthood
Before you get pregnant, read on and do some research on pregnancy, prenatal care, baby care, and parenthood. Know what you're getting into! You'll be better equipped to take on the challenges you thought about ahead of time.
Step 8. Decide if you need to move
Depending on your living conditions, you may need to move to a better or larger location. Think about:
- Do you have enough space. Will the children have their own room? What do you think if they share a bedroom? Do you have storage space for their stuff?
- Is your home conveniently located. Is it close to good schools and recreational areas? Are there parks and safe places to play?
- Are there family and friends near his house. When you have a baby, being around your loved ones will help. Also consider whether you want to be around friends and other family members.
Step 9. Plan for the age difference between your children
It may not be possible to choose exactly how far apart your children's age will be, but it can be helpful to think about whether you want your child to be close in age or not.
- When children are not far apart in age, they will have a lot in common and enjoy many of the same activities. They will grow up together. However, having more than one young child at a time can be overwhelming for you, especially during the first few years.
- When children are far apart in age, they will have less in common and appear less close as siblings. However, it may be less stressful to have one young child at a time, and if you are waiting to have a second child, the first child may be able to help and serve as a role model.
Part 2 of 3: Preparing Yourself Financially
Step 1. Try to increase your income
If possible, before you start trying to conceive, consider working overtime or doing odd jobs to raise some extra money. Having a family is expensive -- often more than people realize. Increasing your income now will help offset future costs.
Step 2. Think about the cost of having children
Children are expensive. You'll need to purchase supplies (a crib, stroller, car seat, highchair for babies, and the like), clothing, diapers, and eating utensils. Ideally, you should research the cost of these items in your area before trying to conceive.
Step 3. Consider the costs of child care and education
If you are planning to return to work, you will need to find a quality daycare center. Depending on your area, you may also need to pay for your child's education when he or she reaches school age. This is a major expense to think about before starting a family.
If you plan to use a child care provider, be sure to look for one that is fully licensed. Doing so will help ensure that you can deduct some expenses from your taxable income
Step 4. Plan your revenue reduction
Even if you plan to return to work after the birth of your baby, it is likely that during and after your pregnancy you will lose your job for a variety of reasons. In addition, depending on your job, you may not be paid for your maternity leave.
Step 5. Save as much as possible
When you are planning to have children, you should start saving as much money as possible. Doing so will help offset future costs. It will also make you feel more comfortable and secure in the decision to start a family.
Step 6. See the possibility to work from home
If your job allows it, working from home might help solve some of the most common problems with work-life balance while preserving all or part of your income.
Please note that even if you work from home, you may need to pay for some of your needs. Otherwise, you will struggle to achieve anything when you are at home with your child
Step 7. Check disability insurance
Depending on your occupation and area, you may benefit from disability insurance, which in some situations can ensure you can continue to earn income throughout your pregnancy. Do some research, and factor that into your plan.
Step 8. Try to save on baby supplies
You may be able to buy some used items, and you may be able to get some free items from friends and family members with older children. Take a look at these options before starting to buy any new stuff.
- Consider checking out laundry deals and stores that sell used goods. Children grow up quickly, so it's better to live frugally in buying supplies.
- Baby seats should always be new. This thing is the only way to prevent accidents in cars. As with other items, be careful and make sure the item you buy meets safety standards. You may need to do some research to be absolutely sure.
Part 3 of 3: Part 3: Prepare Yourself Physically
Step 1. Check your physique
Before you get pregnant, schedule an appointment with your Doctor to do blood tests, update your vaccinations, and discuss your overall health. Specific concerns can include:
- Your weight. Being at a healthy weight will make it easier to get pregnant and help to maximize your chances of having a healthy pregnancy.
- Your age. If you are over 35, you should talk to your doctor about how your age will affect your potential pregnancy.
- Chronic disease. If you have heart problems, high blood pressure, diabetes, or other major health problems, you should discuss a potential pregnancy with your doctor. When you are pregnant, you may need to adjust your medications or take additional steps to make sure you and your baby stay healthy.
Step 2. Meet the dentist
Hormonal fluctuations associated with pregnancy can cause or worsen problems with teeth and gums. It is best to see a dentist before your pregnancy to resolve any old problems and ensure you start your pregnancy with good oral health and hygiene.
Step 3. Schedule a pre-pregnancy visit with your gynecologist
In addition to visiting your doctor and dentist, you should make an appointment with your obstetrician before you start trying to conceive. Your obstetrician will perform regular pelvic exams and Pap tests to check for infections, signs of cervical cancer, and other problems that make pregnancy difficult.
- This is an important step especially if you have a history of miscarriage, or other pregnancy problems.
- If you start trying to conceive and don't get results within six months to a year, you may want to schedule another appointment to discuss potential fertility issues.
Step 4. Eat healthy
Good nutrition is important for a healthy pregnancy, even during the early period, when you may not even realize you are pregnant. Therefore, it is best to start eating healthy before you try to get pregnant. Start to diligently consume lots of fruit, vegetables, whole grains, lean protein, and low-fat dairy products.
In particular, make sure to get enough vitamin D, iron, calcium, and folic acid. Consider taking prenatal vitamins as soon as you try to conceive
Step 5. Exercise regularly
Moderate, regular exercise will improve your mood, energy levels, and blood circulation. It will also help to maintain a healthy weight.
Step 6. Quit smoking
Smoking during pregnancy is very dangerous. Nicotine and carbon monoxide in cigarettes can cause stillbirth, premature birth, and low birth weight. In addition, smoking during pregnancy can cause problems for your child later in life: he may develop lung, heart, or brain problems as a result. If you smoke, do whatever you can to quit before trying to get pregnant.
Step 7. Avoid alcohol
Like smoking, drinking alcohol is also very dangerous during pregnancy. This increases the chances of miscarriage and stillbirth, and also increases your child's risk of developing learning, speaking, language, or behavioral problems. In severe cases, heavy drinking can lead to Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS), which permanently damage the child's central nervous system. Stop drinking as soon as you start trying to get pregnant.
Step 8. Stay away from drugs
Just as smoking and drinking can threaten your pregnancy and pose a risk to your unborn children, using drugs can be very dangerous, but in general, it is best to stop using unnecessary chemicals on your body once you are trying to conceive..
Step 9. Consider the risks associated with your job
Before you start trying to get pregnant, you need to consider whether your job will affect your ability to conceive or to have a healthy pregnancy. If you have a physically demanding job or work in a place where you can be exposed to hazardous chemicals or fumes, you may need to change or quit your job.
Step 10. Stop using birth control devices
Once you've visited your doctor, dentist, and obstetrician and taken steps to ensure that you're as healthy as possible, you can stop using contraception and start trying to get pregnant.
Step 11. Identify your fertile days
You can increase your chances of healthy reproduction by charting your menstrual cycle and having sex during your fertile period. For most women, days 11 through 14 are the most fertile; For best results, you can try to have sex daily or every other day between the 7th and 20th day.
If you have irregular menstrual cycles or are experiencing reproductive difficulties, consider using an ovulation predictor kit. You can buy these tools online or at drugstores. This device checks the luteinizing hormone (LH) in your urine to help you determine your most fertile days
Tips
- Some parents-to-be may find the services of a genetic counselor helpful. If you are concerned about a hereditary disease, ask your Doctor for a referral.
- Talk to friends and family members who are just starting a family. They may be able to point out potential costs and issues that you haven't considered.
- Admit that you can't plan for everything. Unexpected circumstances always arise where pregnancy and parenthood are involved. Follow the steps above to plan as best you can, but be prepared for some things that are out of your control.
