A goal is a mental way of representing a specific and measurable achievement that you want to achieve through effort. Goals may stem from dreams or hopes, but unlike those two things, goals can be measured. With well-planned goals, you can know what you want to achieve and how to achieve it. Writing life goals will be very useful and beneficial. Research shows that setting goals makes you feel more confident and hopeful-even if they aren't immediate. As the famous Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu said, "a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step". You can take the first step on your journey to success by setting realistic personal goals.
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Part 1 of 3: Formulating Effective Goals
Step 1. Think about what is meaningful to you
Research shows that when you set a goal based on something that motivates you, you're more likely to achieve it. Find out which aspect of your life you want to change. It's okay if at this stage the area is still quite large.
- Commonly targeted areas are self-improvement, improving relationships, or achieving a level of success through processes such as work or school. Other areas you can look into are spirituality, finance, community, and health.
- Consider asking yourself questions, such as "What do I want to grow up to be like?" or “What do I want to give the world?” These big questions can help determine what is most valuable to you.
- For example, you might think of a significant change you would like to see in your health and personal relationships. Write down those two areas, as well as any changes you want.
- It doesn't matter if at this point the changes you want are still broad. For example, in the health area you might write “get fitter” or “eat healthy”. In a personal relationship, you might write “spend more time with family” or “meet new people”. For the self-development area, you could write “learn to cook”.
Step 2. Identify the “best version of yourself”
Research shows that identifying the “best version of yourself” can make you feel more positive and happier about life. It can also help you determine what goals are truly meaningful to you. You have to go through two steps to find the “best version of yourself”, which is to visualize your future self when you have reached your goal, and consider the characteristics you must possess to achieve that goal.
- Imagine a time in the future when you were the best version of yourself. What does it look like? What is most valuable to you? Remember to keep the focus on what is meaningful to you, not on what other people expect you to achieve.
- Imagine the details of your future self. Think in a positive way. You can imagine “dream life”, milestones, or other accomplishments. For example, if the best version of yourself is a baker who owns a successful cake shop, imagine what that bakery would look like. Where is it? What does it look like? How many employees do you have? What type of boss have you become? How much do you work on?
- Write down all the details of the visualization. Imagine what characteristics your “best version of yourself” used to achieve this success. For example, if you own your own cake shop, you will need to know how to bake, manage money, network with others, solve problems, be creative, and determine the demand for cakes in your shop. Write down as many characteristics and skills as you can think of.
- Think about what characteristics you already have. Here you have to be honest with yourself, don't judge. Then, think about what characteristics you can develop.
- Imagine ways to develop those characteristics and skills. For example, if you want to own a pastry shop but don't know how to run a small business, take a course in business management or finance as a way to develop the skills you need.
Step 3. Prioritize the area
Once you've written down the areas you want to change, you need to make them a priority. If you try to focus on improving everything at once, you'll be overwhelmed, and you'll likely be discouraged in the process if you feel that the goal is unattainable.
- Break your goal down into three parts: an overall goal, a second-level goal, and a third-level goal. The overall goal is the most important goal, which is what you naturally want. The second and third goals are also important, but not as important as the overall goal and tend to be more specific.
- For example: your overall goal is “put your health first (most important), improve family relations (most important), travel abroad”, and on the second level “be a good friend, keep your house clean, climb Mount Semeru” and in the third level “learn to knit, be more efficient at work, exercise every day”.
Step 4. Start narrowing down the goal
Once you've found the area you want to change and what changes you want, you can develop a specification of what you want to achieve. These specifications will form the basis of your goals. Ask who, what, when, where, how and why questions, so that you can answer all aspects of your desired achievement.
Research shows that setting specific goals not only makes it easier for you to achieve them, but also makes you feel happier
Step 5. Decide who
When setting goals, you need to know who is responsible for achieving each part of the goal. Since this is a personal goal, you are the most responsible person. However, some goals-such as “spending more time with family”-require the cooperation of others, so it's a good idea to identify who will share responsibility for that part.
For example, “learning to cook” is a personal goal that may only involve you. However, if your goal is to “host a dinner party”, you also need someone else's responsibility
Step 6. Determine what
These questions help define the goals, details, and results you want to achieve. For example, “learning to cook” is still too broad to be carried out due to lack of focus. Think about the details of what you want to achieve. A more specific goal is “learn to cook Italian food for friends”. This goal can still be made more specific, namely “learn to cook chicken parmigiana for friends”.
The more detailed these elements you create, the clearer the steps you need to take to achieve them
Step 7. Determine when
One of the keys to setting goals is to break them down into stages. It will be easier for you to monitor and track progress when you know the specific parts of your plan.
- Set realistic stages. “lose 5 kg” is unlikely to happen in a matter of weeks. Think about the realistic time it will take to reach each stage of the plan.
- For example, “learn to cook chicken parmigiana for my friends tomorrow” may not be realistic. This goal can be stressful because you're trying to achieve something without giving enough time to study (and making inevitable mistakes).
- “Learn to cook chicken parmigiana for my friends later this month” will provide enough time for practice and study. But you should still break this goal down into stages to increase the chances of success.
- The following sample goal illustrates breaking the process down into easy-to-do steps: “Learn to cook chicken parmigiana for my friends at the end of the month. Look for recipes this weekend. Practice at least three recipes, once for one recipe. After finding a recipe that I like, I will practice cooking that recipe again until it's time to invite friends.”
Step 8. Determine where
In many cases, choosing one specific place to reach your destination will be very helpful. For example, if your goal is to exercise 3 times a week, you will need to determine whether you will go to the gym, exercise at home, or run in the park.
In the previous example, you could decide to start taking cooking lessons, or decide to learn in your own kitchen
Step 9. Determine how
This step encourages you to imagine how you will reach each stage in the goal. It outlines your goals, and gives awareness of what actions are needed for each stage.
Coming back to the chicken parmigiana example, you have to find the recipe, get the ingredients, prepare all the necessary tools, and spend some time learning to cook
Step 10. Determine why
As mentioned earlier, your goals will be easier to achieve if they are meaningful and you are motivated to achieve them. This question will help clarify what your motivation is for achieving that goal. How will that goal benefit you if it is already achieved?
- In the example of learning to cook, maybe you want to learn how to cook chicken parmigiana for friends so you can invite them to have a special meal together. This will strengthen bonds with your friends and show that you care and love them.
- You need to think about these “why” questions when trying to reach your goals. Setting very concrete and specific goals helps, but you also need to keep the “bigger picture” in mind.
Step 11. Arrange your goals in positive words
Research shows that goals are more likely to be achieved when framed in positive words. In other words, set goals as something you want to work towards, not something you want to run away from.
- For example, if one of your goals is to eat healthier foods, you shouldn't put it in the words "stop eating fast food." That kind of wording gives the impression that something has been taken from you, and humans don't like that feeling.
- Instead, try to set goals that you want to achieve or study, such as “eat at least 3 servings of fruits and vegetables every day”.
Step 12. Make sure your goals are attainable through effort
Achieving goals takes hard work and motivation, but you also have to make sure that you set goals that are achievable on your own. You can only control your actions, but you have no control over the results (or the actions of others).
- Choosing goals that focus on actions you can take, rather than on the specific results you want to achieve, will also help if there are obstacles. By considering success as a business process, you will feel as if you have achieved your goal even if you don't get the results you expected.
- For example, “Becoming President of the Republic of Indonesia” is a goal that depends on the results of the actions of others (i.e. voters). You cannot control their actions, and as such, this goal is problematic. However, “following local elections” is more likely to be achieved, as this goal depends on your motivation and effort. Even if you don't win the election, you can view the process of achieving it as a success.
Part 2 of 3: Developing a Plan
Step 1. Define your goals
Goals are actions or tactics you use to achieve goals. Breaking down goals into concrete tasks will make it easier for you to achieve them and monitor progress. Use the answers to the questions you asked yourself earlier-what, where, when, why, who, how-to help identify what your goals are.
- For example, consider this statement of purpose: “I want to study law so I can help underprivileged members of the community with legal matters and civil courts”. This is a specific goal, but it is still very complex. You will have to set multiple goals in an effort to achieve them.
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Examples of goals for this purpose are:
- Doing well in high school
- Participate in the debate team
- Looking for undergraduate educational institutions
- Enroll in law school
Step 2. Determine your time frame
Some types of goals can be achieved faster than others. For example, “walking in the park for 1 hour, 3 days a week” is a goal you can start right away. But for other types of goals, you'll need to define multiple stages that are divided over a longer period of time.
- In the law school example, this goal takes several years to achieve. There are many stages in the process, each stage is marked with a goal and each goal is broken down into a number of tasks.
- Make sure you consider external deadlines and other conditions. For example, the goal of “find an undergraduate educational institution” should be done before you apply for college. You need time for that, and educational institutions have application deadlines. Therefore, make sure that you have defined an appropriate time frame for this goal
Step 3. Break the goal down into tasks
Once you've determined your goals and timeframe, break them down into smaller, concrete tasks. These are the actions you must take to achieve your goals. Set a deadline for each task as a reminder that you are on track.
- For example, the first goal in law school is "to do well in high school", you can divide this goal into several specific and concrete tasks, such as "take additional lessons such as government and history" and "join study groups with friends. class".
- Some of these assignments have deadlines that other people set, such as “taking a lesson”. In tasks with no specific deadlines, make sure you set your own deadlines to keep the responsibilities.
Step 4. Break the task into several obligations
By now you've probably noticed a trend, which is that things are getting smaller and smaller. There's a good reason behind it. Research has always shown that specific goals will lead to good performance, even if the process is difficult. This is because you will have a hard time doing your best if you don't know exactly what the goal is.
You can break down “take extra lessons like government and history” assignments into tasks. Each obligation has its own deadline. For example, the obligations for this task include “reviewing the available tutoring schedule”, “scheduling an appointment with a BK teacher”, and “making a decision to register by [date]”
Step 5. List some specific things you have done
Maybe you have already started to do some required action or effort. For example, if your goal is law school, reading about the law in various news sources is a productive habit that you need to continue.
Make a specific list. When making a specific list, you may find that some obligations or tasks have been performed and you are not aware of them at all. This will help because you are aware that progress is being made
Step 6. Find out what you have to learn and develop
For some types of goals, you may not yet have the skills or habits needed to achieve them. Think about the characteristics, skills, and habits you currently have-a “best version of yourself” exercise will help here-and tailor them to your goals.
- If you find a point that needs to be developed, set it as a new goal. Follow the troubleshooting process as above.
- For example, if you want to become a lawyer, you must be comfortable speaking in public and interacting with many people. If you are very shy, you will have to develop your skills in this area in various ways to improve your abilities in order to achieve your ultimate goal.
Step 7. Make a plan for the day
One of the most common reasons people can't reach their goals is the thought that they will start working towards their goals tomorrow. Even if your goals are very small, think about what you can do today to start one component of the overall plan. This will spark the realization that progress is being made because you took quick action.
The actions you take today can prepare you to complete other tasks or obligations. For example, you may realize that you must gather information before making an appointment with a counseling teacher. Or, if your goal is to walk 3 times a week, maybe you should buy shoes that are comfortable and supportive for walking. Even small achievements will burn your motivation to keep going
Step 8. Identify the obstacles that may arise in the middle of the road
No one likes to think about the obstacles that stand in the way of success, but you should identify possible obstacles when developing a plan. This will help prepare you for the unexpected. Identify the obstacles that may arise, as well as the actions you can take to overcome them.
- Barriers can be external, such as a lack of money or time to achieve goals. For example, if you want to set up your own cake shop, the most significant obstacle is the capital to register your company, rent a place, buy equipment, etc.
- Actions you can take to overcome these obstacles include learning to write a business proposal to attract investors, talking to friends and family about investing, or starting on a smaller scale (like baking a cake in your own kitchen).
- Obstacles can also be internal. Lack of information is a common barrier. You may encounter these obstacles at some stage in the process of achieving your goals. Still with the example of setting up a cake shop, you may find that the market wants a type of cake that you can't make.
- Actions you can take to address this are to find another baker who knows how to bake the cake the market wants, take a course, or learn to make it yourself until it works.
- Fear is one of the most common internal barriers. The fear of not being able to achieve your goals will prevent you from taking productive action. The section below on fighting fear will teach you some techniques that can help you.
Part 3 of 3: Fighting Fear
Step 1. Use visualization
Research shows that visualization has a significant effect on improving performance. Many athletes say that this technique is the reason behind their success. There are two forms of visualization, namely result visualization and process visualization, and the chances of success are highest if you combine the two.
- Visualization of results is imagining that you have reached your goal. Like the “best version of yourself” exercise, this imaginative visualization should be specific and detailed. Use all of your senses to create this mental picture: imagine who you are with, what smells you smell, what sounds you hear, what you wear, where you are. Perhaps creating a visualization board would be useful in this process.
- Process visualization is imagining the steps you have to take in order to reach your goal. Think about every action you have taken. For example, if your goal is to become a lawyer, use result visualization to imagine yourself passing a professional exam. Then, use process visualization to visualize all the things you do to ensure that success.
- Psychologists call this process "coding prospective memories." This process can help you feel like a task can be done, and it can also make you feel like you've achieved some success.
Step 2. Practice positive thinking
Research shows that positive thinking is more effective at helping people learn, adapt, and change than focusing on flaws or mistakes. The size of your goals doesn't matter, positive thinking is just as effective for top athletes, students or business managers.
- Research shows that positive and negative feedback affects different parts of the brain. Positive thoughts stimulate areas of the brain associated with visual processing, imagination, “big picture” thinking, empathy, and motivation.
- For example, remember that your goal is a positive growth experience, not something you give up or leave behind.
- If you're having trouble reaching your goals, ask friends and family for encouragement.
- Positive thoughts alone are not enough. You must carry out all the goals, tasks and obligations, and take actions that will support the achievement of the ultimate goal. Relying solely on positive thoughts will not get you that far.
Step 3. Recognize “false hope syndrome”
This is a term psychologists use to describe a cycle that may be familiar if you've ever made a New Year's resolution. This cycle consists of three parts: 1) setting the goal, 2) wondering why the goal is difficult to achieve, 3) ignoring the goal.
- This cycle can happen when you expect immediate results (which often happens with New Year's resolutions). Setting goals and setting a time frame will help you fight these unrealistic expectations.
- This can also happen when the initial impetus when setting goals wears off, and you have to face the real effort. Setting goals and then breaking them down into smaller components can help maintain momentum. Every time you complete a small obligation, celebrate.
Step 4. Use failure as a learning experience
Research shows that people who learn from failure tend to have a positive outlook on the possibility of achieving goals. An attitude of hope is a vital component of achieving goals, and hope looks forward, not backward.
Research also shows that people who succeed do not experience more or less failure than people who give up. The difference is in the way they view failure
Step 5. Fight the tendency to always be perfect
Perfectionism usually stems from a fear of failure, we may want to be "perfect" so as not to experience defeat or fear or "failure". However, perfectionism cannot prevent this natural possibility. Perfectionism will only set impossible standards for you as well as for others. Many studies have shown there is a strong link between perfectionism and unhappiness.
- "Perfectionism" is often misunderstood as "the struggle for success." However, many studies show that perfectionists experience less success than people who don't try to live up to unrealistic standards. Perfectionism can cause intense anxiety, fear, and procrastination.
- Instead of struggling with the idea of unattainable perfection, accept the possibility of failure that comes with striving for a real goal. For example, inventor Myshkin Ingawale wanted to find a technology that would test for anemia in pregnant women to reduce maternal mortality in India. He often tells the story of 32 failures when he first tried to create this technology. Because he didn't let perfectionism dominate his attitude, he kept trying new tactics, and his 33rd invention finally worked.
- Developing a self-love attitude can help fight perfectionism. Remember that you are human, and all humans experience failures and obstacles. Be kind to yourself if you run into obstacles on your way to success.
Step 6. Get used to being grateful
Research shows there is a consistent link between the habit of gratitude and success in achieving goals. Keeping a gratitude journal is one of the easiest and most effective ways to apply gratitude habits in your daily life.
- Don't think of writing a gratitude journal as writing a novel. Writing a sentence or two about an experience or person you are grateful for is enough to have the desired effect.
- Rest assured that the habit of journaling will bring success. As cliché as it may sound, a gratitude journal will be more successful if you consciously tell yourself that it helps you be happier and more grateful. Abandon skepticism.
- Enjoy every specific moment, no matter how small. Don't rush into journaling. Instead, linger and think about the experiences or moments that mattered to you and why you are grateful for them.
- Fill out your journal once or twice per week. Research shows that journaling every day is actually less effective than just writing a few times per week. Perhaps this is because we quickly become immune to positivity.
Tips
- You can extend or shorten the deadline if you feel you can't reach your goal. However, if it takes too long to reach your goal or there just isn't enough time, consider re-evaluating the goals you set, they may be too difficult to achieve, or even too easy.
- Setting personal goals is a rewarding experience, and so is achieving them. Once the goal is achieved, reward yourself. Nothing motivates you more than the next goal on the list.
Warning
- Don't set so many goals that you start to feel overwhelmed and end up accomplishing nothing.
- Setting personal goals and then never achieving them is common (remember New Year's resolutions). You have to stay motivated and focus on the end result so you can actually achieve it.
