Fear of the dark can turn what should be the most relaxing and refreshing part of life into a nightmare. The fear of the dark doesn't just affect children; Many adults are also afraid of the dark, so there's no reason to be embarrassed about this, no matter how old you are. The way to overcome your fear of the dark is to adjust your perspective and try to make your bedroom feel safe and comfortable-even when the lights are off.
Step
Part 1 of 3: Getting Ready for Sleep
Step 1. Calm down before bed
One way to help overcome your fear of the dark is to make sure you've given yourself enough time to cool off before bed. Turn off half of all your electronic devices at least half an hour before bed, avoid caffeine after noon, and do whatever is comfortable and relaxing, whether it's a quick read or some soft music. Anyway, bring yourself into the most calm and relaxed state of mind to ease the anxiety when the lights are off.
- Try meditating for 10 minutes. Sit relaxed and focus your mind only on the pulling activity while exhaling and relaxing one limb at a time. Focus only on the body and the breath. Remove all anxiety from your mind.
- Find suitable activities. For example, drinking chamomile tea, listening to classical music, or hugging a favorite cat.
- Avoid doing any activity that will make you more afraid or anxious, such as watching the evening news or violent TV shows. Also avoid anything that can stress you out and make you more anxious at night, such as last-minute homework or serious conversations.
Step 2. Gradually acclimatize to dark conditions
You don't have to turn off all the lights at once to overcome your fear of the dark. First of all, you should know that sleeping in the dark will make you sleep more soundly and completely than with the lights on. Use this fact as a starting point for daring to sleep in the dark. If you're used to sleeping with all the lights on out of fear, you can learn to slowly dim the lights before going to bed, or even turn off some lights if you wake up in the middle of the night. This can help slowly get used to sleeping in the dark.
Set goals for yourself, for example by deciding that you don't mind sleeping with only a dim light on, or by turning on a light in another room
Step 3. Challenge your fears
When going to sleep at night, ask yourself what exactly are you afraid of. If you think someone is hiding in the closet, under the bed, or even behind a chair in the corner of the room, it's a good idea to check all those places yourself. Prove to yourself that there is absolutely nothing there and nothing to worry about. If you do this, you'll be proud of yourself for successfully defying your fears and will undoubtedly be able to sleep more soundly.
If you suddenly wake up scared in the middle of the night, rest assured that the sooner all these places are checked, the sooner you will feel calmer. Don't waste the night worrying about the unknown
Step 4. Leave a few lights on, if you need to
No need to be ashamed of using dim lights or soft lights in the corner of the room. If this is indeed able to ease your fear and make you more courageous, then there is no need to feel like you have to turn off all the lights for fear relief therapy. After all, turning on a dim light in the corridor or a bright light in another room will make it easier for you to move around if you suddenly wake up and have to go to the bathroom.
Many people sleep with little light on, so you don't have to feel like you have to sleep in complete darkness to heal from your fear
Step 5. Make your room more attractive
Another way to deal with fear is to convince yourself that your room is comfortable and comfortable to sleep in. Keep it neat and tidy to reduce anxiety that something is hiding under a pile of clothes or in a messy closet. Try to decorate the room with warm and bright colors to make it feel more peaceful and give positive energy. Do not overcrowd the room with furniture or obscure items, as this will make you feel suffocated. If you try to create a positive atmosphere in your bedroom, you will naturally feel safer there.
- Hang pictures and/or photos that make you feel safe and cool. Images that are dark, mysterious, scary or even threatening will actually make you even more wry without realizing it.
- Making the bedroom so attractive will also make the place feel at home for a long time. The goal is to make you feel safe and happy, not scared.
Step 6. Learn to sleep alone
If you're afraid of the dark, you might prefer to sleep with your parents, siblings, or even your pet dog. However, if you really want to get rid of that fear, then you have to learn to see your own bed as a safe place where you can sleep alone. If you are used to sleeping with your parents or siblings, try to spend only half the night with them and reduce the amount of sleep with siblings, little by little.
If you have a dog or cat, they can be a great source of comfort, and sleeping with them is powerful enough to reduce fear. However, don't rely too much on them to sleep with you forever. Let sleep on your toes or in the room is enough
Part 2 of 3: Adjust Perspective
Step 1. Change your perspective on darkness
One of the reasons why you are afraid of the dark is because you feel that the dark is evil, unpleasant, mysterious, chaotic, or something else with a negative connotation. However, if you want to accept darkness, start by forming positive associations. Think of darkness as soothing, cleansing, or even comforting, like a thick velvet blanket. Try to change your perception of darkness, and you will soon be able to accept it.
Write down everything you associate with darkness. As ridiculous as it may be, scribble or tear the piece of paper. Then, go back to writing and replace it with more positive associations. If it feels ridiculous, just say it out loud
Step 2. Imagine and think of your bed as a safe place
People who are afraid of the dark are usually also afraid of their own bed, because they see it as a place that makes them vulnerable to harm. If you want to change your perspective on darkness, you have to think of your bed as a source of comfort and protection. As a place where you want to be, not feared. Put on a comfortable blanket and spend some time relaxing in bed, doing things that make you want to get a good night's sleep right away.
Spend more time reading and getting comfortable in your bed. This will help you feel happy to be there at night
Step 3. Don't be shy about admitting your fears
Many adults claim to be afraid of the dark. No matter your age, there's no need to feel ashamed about your fear; everyone has a fear of something, and you should be proud to be honest and open about it. Be proud of yourself for admitting that you have certain fears and want to work on overcoming them. In fact, there is a study that shows that 40% of adults admit to harboring a fear of the dark.
The more open you are about your fears, the quicker you will be able to overcome them
Step 4. Tell the other person
Talking openly to others about your fears can help make you feel more supported and comfortable as you try to overcome those fears. Also, by talking about this you may be able to meet other people to share your fears with and get some good advice in the process. Furthermore, by opening up about your fear of the dark, it will make you feel relieved rather than keeping it to yourself.
Friends will definitely support your problem of fear of the dark and you don't have to worry that they will judge negatively if they are true friends
Step 5. Seek help if needed
In fact, it is not always possible to completely overcome fear, no matter how hard you try to relieve it. However, if the fear you feel is so unbearable that you are sleep deprived and live an uncomfortable life, it may be time to seek professional help to discuss your concerns, with all their broader implications. Never feel ashamed to ask others for help.
You can talk to your doctor about your fear and see if the effects are really unbearable; he or she may suggest certain medications or the best course of action to take. You will also be able to uncover the real root cause of the anxiety that leads to the fear of the dark
Part 3 of 3: Helping Your Child Overcome Fear of the Dark
Step 1. Don't make fun of the feeling of fear
If you want to help your child overcome his fear of the dark, you have to show him that there really are no monsters under the bed or scary people in the closet. Don't be fooled by saying, "I'll make sure there aren't any monsters in your closet tonight!" Point out and explain that there's no way any monsters are hiding in the closet. This can help your child convince himself that his fear is irrational.
- If you joke about that fear, your child will believe that someday there will be a monster or bad person in the dark. Don't get me wrong that your jokes will help the child in the short term. What exists will even confirm his fears.
- You won't always be around the child to “check under the bed”; so teach that there is no point in checking under the bed at all.
Step 2. Make sure your child has a relaxing bedtime routine
Another way to help your child deal with fear is to make sure that their bedtime routine is really soothing and comfortable. Make sure you read them a bedtime story, avoid giving them sparkling water or sugary foods before bed, and help them avoid seeing anything scary on the news or late-night TV shows that sends their imaginations wild in the wrong direction. The more relaxed your child is before bed, the less anxious they will be about the dark.
- Help your child to take a warm bath or chat casually, rather than things that make him nervous.
- If you have kittens, spend some time petting them with your child to calm them down.
- Try to soften your voice and tone it down with empathy. Do everything slowly so that the child is ready to sleep. Start dimming the lights.
Step 3. Talk to the child about his or her fear
Make sure you really listen to what he's talking about so you can deduce what really scares him; it could be simply a general fear of the dark, or a fear of a thief, for example. The more you know about what the child is afraid of, the easier it will be to deal with the problem. After all, your child will feel more comfortable after discussing the problem with you.
Make sure your child is not shy about talking about their fears. When your child talks, make it clear that he has nothing to be ashamed of, and that everyone has fears
Step 4. Strengthen your child's safety and comfort
Make sure your child feels safe and comfortable, not only at bedtime but throughout the day. Despite the fact that you won't be able to look after your child 100% of the time, you can still try to make them feel safe and comfortable. Always reassure them and tell them how much you love them, will always be there for them, and make it clear that your home is safe from harm. This will help your child let go of the fear of the dark.
Present safe items in the child's room and bed. If your child wants a favorite blanket or a night light, so be it. Never think that children have to dare to sleep in total darkness without a blanket to overcome their fear
Step 5. Make your child believe that the bed is safe to sleep in
Your child has to believe that the bed is a comfortable and safe place, not a nuisance. Read books to your child in bed so that he has as much positive association with the place as possible. Try not to spend too much time on the bed yourself, so that the child feels comfortable and safe. While it's normal for you to want to protect your child on your own, it's even more important that you give your child the tools they need to feel safe without the help of others, in the long run.
Don't get used to sleeping together. Even if you think letting your child sleep together on your bed will make them comfortable, it's only temporary. Encourage him to sleep in his own bed because in the end he will have to get used to sleeping there alone
Step 6. Seek help if necessary
Sometimes, it's really limited what we can do to help children overcome their fear of the dark. If your child is bedwetting a lot, wakes up screaming in the midst of nightmares, or is showing greater anxiety and fear about other aspects of his or her daily life, then taking him to the doctor will help you find and treat the source of your child's fear and anxiety. Don't just assume that your child will recover on their own. Make an effort to actually provide the help you need.
If you think the problem is serious, then the longer you delay, the more difficult it will be for your child to deal with it
Tips
- Buy a t-shirt that glows in the dark. As silly as it may seem, this t-shirt lights up before you go to sleep, slowly dimming and dying. Plus, it's cool, you know.
- Sleeping with the family pet is enough to ensure that you are safe. Your pet will let you know when it hears or feels anything, especially bad things.
- If you're scared, try talking to a friend or family member before bed or whenever you feel anxious. Sometimes it's helpful to talk about your fears with other people.
- Read on. Read until you are very sleepy and your brain is too tired to be afraid of the dark.
- If you're scared, try to think of funny things that happened this day or week.
- Turn on a musical instrument or air conditioner, so you don't hear strange noises.
- You can sleep in the middle of a pile of stuffed animals.
- Imagine how other people would react in your situation. If their actions are more helpful in overcoming the fear, take them.
- Remember that sometimes anxiety is helpful and necessary for survival. Your fear can be the only thing that warns you and keeps you out of danger.
- Keep a daily journal of your fears. If you want, let the family read it too so they can help and provide support.
- If you hear noises, get checked immediately. Or if you are really scared, invite a friend to come see.
- Do you remember the masks you used to wear at the spa? Try buying one and sleeping wearing it. It may feel uncomfortable at first, but after a while you will get used to it. The mask helps keep the eye from wandering around the room seeing shadows and other things.
- Before going to bed, smile and talk to your family about the day's activities. Sometimes it's the experience of the day that scares you.
- When you're scared, try to remember funny things that happened in your life or something you've seen or read, such as a person running through a glass door and then getting up and looking around and crashing again before finally opening the door.
- Remember: the room you sleep in in the dark is exactly the same condition when the lights are on, so there's nothing to be afraid of. Just your imagination!
- Play some music for a while; this will help calm you down and give you something else to think about.
- If your bed is pressed against the wall, turn your body to face the wall. This position ensures that you don't see shadows of furniture that might frighten you.
- If you hear voices, try to imagine a pleasant reason for the source of the sound. For example, if you hear a rattling sound, think of it as the sound of a pet pacing back and forth looking for dinner.
- Listen to soft music at night.
- Imagine and think that it was okay when you were afraid that something would happen.
- If you're afraid of the dark and can't sleep, don't let your eyes wander around in fear of imagining something is about to hit you, but try to focus on your breathing with your eyes closed.
- If your bed is against the wall, press your back against the wall to feel more secure.
- Always keep a pocket flashlight near your bed, so it's easier to check if you're feeling scared.
- Make sure there are no scary posters or anything else in the room that might trigger fear. Put pets to bed, if necessary.
- Think of something to have a dialogue with yourself in your mind at night. Try to think positively. Maybe all day I had seen funny cartoons. Just imagine that.
Warning
- If you choose to turn on a lava lamp at night, keep in mind that these lights often cast strange shadows on the walls.
- If you want a little extra light, don't turn on all the lights in the house at once. It's wasteful and the electricity costs are expensive.
