Admit it, sometimes you have the urge to pretend to be sick so you can sleep in the School Health Unit (UKS) room or go home. Do not worry; You are not alone! Basically, there are various reasons that root the emergence of this desire. For example, your symptoms may not be so serious or embarrassing that you are reluctant to explain them to the UKS staff. In addition, you may also want to skip class, avoid exams, run away from bullying, or just want to give your mental and mind a break for a while. Unfortunately, pretending to be sick isn't as easy as it sounds; To find out the powerful tips, try practicing the methods below to make your acting look more convincing!
Step
Step 1. Say that you didn't feel well the morning or the night before
Thus, they will not be surprised if suddenly contacted by the UKS officer at your school.
- Just convey your complaint casually. After that, ask if your parents have cough medicine or other medicines that are relevant to your complaint.
- Don't overdo it in front of your parents. Trust me, they can suspect you and easily expose your lies.
- Adjust the symptoms of the disease that you convey to your parents with those that you convey to the UKS staff. If necessary, you may slightly modify it in front of the UKS staff. For example, you can admit to having a sore throat to your parents and ask them for cough medicine. After that, tell the UKS officer that you have sore throat, headache, and are really not feeling well.
Step 2. Make a solid plan
If you want to avoid certain exams, go to the UKS a few hours before the exam. He'll most likely ask you which class you're taking at that time of day and make sure you're not avoiding something important.
Step 3. Pretend to be sick in class
Your teacher won't let you into the UKS room if you look fine. Don't overdo it, but try to do things at a slower pace. Blink as if you were tired, and rub your head or eyes as if you had excruciating pain in those areas. Don't talk too much either; trust me, a teacher will notice if their students seem quieter than usual (especially if you are usually very chatty).
Do not immediately ask your teacher for permission to go to UKS. Some students will not explain the pain they are experiencing because they think the pain will go away by itself
Step 4. Don't overdo it
Your illness will look more convincing if you don't try to fake vomit or make up symptoms that are too serious. Save your fake vomit recipe for a Halloween party; Remember, not everyone will vomit when sick. After all, recognizing fake vomit is very easy, especially from the smell which can't really resemble real vomit.
Remember, most UKS staff have experience with students who pretend to be sick. Most likely, they already know most of the tricks that students often use
Step 5. Get other people to guess your illness
Do not mention the name of the disease you are experiencing to the UKS staff; for example, don't admit to having a cold or migraine. Instead, just share the symptoms you feel such as stomach pain, headache, itchy throat, not feeling well, dizziness, etc.
- Choose a disease that you have experienced before. For example, if you've never had migraines, don't choose that disease. Believe me, faking a disease that you have never experienced is not as easy as turning the palm of your hand.
- Think twice before admitting to throwing up in the bathroom. Careful; other than the situation you can't prove, this tactic is so commonly used by students who are feigning illness that it's likely to be hard to believe.
Step 6. Do not ask the UKS staff to contact your parents
Remember, never ask the UKS staff to do it; instead, make him offer you the options you're after. If you overreact, he's more likely to suspect you and ask you to return to class. Therefore, it is enough to ask permission to "lie down", just to "close your eyes" or to encourage the UKS staff to give you vitamins. Trust me, it's much more convincing! Most likely, the UKS staff will allow you to rest for one hour of class.
Step 7. Go to sleep (or pretend to be asleep) while lying down to make your acting look more convincing
Try covering your face with a pillow or with your hands.
Step 8. When the UKS officer wakes you up, explain that you are still not feeling well
However, of course you can't ask to be sent home, can you? Instead, get the school clerk to offer you to come home.
Step 9. Don't look too excited
Most likely, the UKS officer will ask if he or she needs to contact your parents. Hold on a little longer, you're almost done! So don't confuse him by being overly excited when he asks.
Try saying, "But I don't want to miss class," or "I think I have to do my math homework first, Mom."
Step 10. Insert the sentence, "But it's okay Mom, I'm really having a hard time concentrating right now"
Step 11. Pretend to be sick when your parents pick you up at school
Close your eyes and clear your throat periodically (if you pretend to have a cough) along the way to the house.
Make sure your condition doesn't "suddenly improve"; your parents will notice that you are faking illness! Instead, continue to pretend to be sick while your parents are still home
Step 12. When you get home, make sure you lie down on the bed right away
Stay there until your parents return to the office.
Tips
- If you are at the UKS during recess, most likely the UKS staff will ask if you are hungry and want to buy something. If you accept the question, decline the offer and say you're not hungry.
- Headaches offset by high sensitivity are one of the symptoms of migraines. Don't try to fake it if you've never had a migraine because the symptoms are quite unique.
- Faking a headache or dizziness isn't as difficult as you might think; most importantly, make sure you do everything at a slow pace and be more careless. After all, no one can prove that you're pretending to be sick, right?
- Pay attention to the illnesses that have plagued people at your school over the past week or two. If students or teachers at your school have had a lot of coughs or colds over the past few weeks, try to take advantage of the situation and choose the same disease. Most likely, the UKS staff will immediately believe and understand the situation.
- Pretend to be tired. Every time you stand up, indicate that you feel dizzy and have difficulty standing up straight. If necessary, show a fainting reaction whenever you don't lie down.
- If you want to pretend you have a cough, be prepared to go through the throat swab examination process.
- Know your target. If the UKS officer at your school is easily fooled by pretending to be sick, act more optimally in front of him than in front of your parents.
- Choose the right time! It's best not to pretend to be sick on Mondays or after class breaks.
- Some symptoms match when they occur together, but some don't. For example, do not combine stomach pain with earache.
- If you are menstruating, explain to your mother in the morning that your cramps are more severe than usual. In the afternoon, convey the same thing to the UKS staff. Try holding your stomach when you say it to make your acting look more convincing.
Warning
- Don't pretend to be sick too often; trust me, doing so will increase your chances of getting caught.
- If your lies are exposed, it's more likely that people will have a hard time believing you when you're really sick.
- Do not choose the type of disease that is too severe! Be careful, UKS officers can take additional handling actions that risk exposing your lies.
- Don't share your plans with untrusted friends. Be careful, they can leak it to your teacher or UKS staff and get you in big trouble.
- Pretending to be sick to avoid bullying won't stop the bullying. If you become a victim of bullying, make sure you report it immediately to a trusted adult such as your teacher, parent, school counselor, or principal.
- Basically, lying in any form and for any reason is disrespectful. Apart from wasting the UKS staff's time, in fact you have also been unfair to other students who are really sick and need health care. If you don't really have to, make sure you always act and tell the truth!
