How to Pretend Sick So You Can Skip School (with Pictures)

2024 Author: Jason Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 10:50

Don't want to go to school today? Didn't do your homework last night? Should you exercise today? Or just feeling lazy? Here's how to fake sick so you can skip school!

Step

Part 1 of 5: Getting Sick from the Night Before

Step 1. Start showing mild symptoms the night before

If you want to stay home tomorrow, tell your mom and dad if you haven't been feeling well since the night before.

• Don't tell them the morning before, because some ailments can be cured overnight, such as stomach ache. Try to start showing symptoms after 6:30 p.m., or after dinner.
• If you are sick with a virus or germ, imitate the symptoms; that way you won't look like you're faking it. But remember, you can't be infected with the same germ twice! If you see someone who has a fever or has a certain disease, try to imitate the symptoms, so it looks like you caught the disease from them.
• Slap yourself on the cheek. When you start to have a fever or illness, your cheeks will turn red. You can imitate this by repeatedly slapping your cheek when your parents aren't looking. But don't overdo it, because you certainly don't want to hurt yourself! Or, use blush instead.
• Act a little limp, as it will make you look sick or tired.

Step 2. Don't do what you love

Your parents will find it easier to believe if you also stop doing activities you love, not just activities you hate (like going to school).

• Don't eat your favorite food at dinner. When your parents ask what's wrong, say that your stomach hurts. Make sure to have snacks ready in your room ahead of time, so you can eat less and your parents will think you're sick because you're "not feeling well."
• If you have an appointment with your friends, cancel your event.
• Ask for permission to skip family events or watch your favorite shows.

Step 3. Start homework, but don't finish it

This will disguise the fact that you're trying not to go to school, and give you a solid reason to stay home tomorrow.

• If you usually do your homework at night, start doing it, but put your head on the table every few minutes, so your parents can see that you're not feeling well, and that your condition is interfering with your efforts to do your homework.
• If you usually do your homework on time, continue this habit as if you were going to school, but after doing half of it, complain that you feel sick.
• Since you didn't finish your homework, your parents have other reasons not to tell you to go to school.
• This step is perfect if your parents really care about your grades.

Step 4. Go to bed early

If you go to bed early, your parents will be even more worried, especially if you usually like to go to bed later than they allow.

• Don't say anything, or just say you're not feeling well and want to sleep.
• Alternatively, get your parents to pay more attention to you by walking past them or out of the room and straight into yours.
• If you feel really sick, but it's so mild that your parents ignore you, try exaggerating your symptoms. (For example "nausea" becomes "I want to throw up"). Some studies say that you will feel what you think, so this can be a powerful way to convince your parents! Remember: this "trick" will only work if you're really sick, so don't try it if you're not. This will be your excuse tomorrow!
• Don't brush your teeth. If your parents notice, they may come into your room to remind you. At that point, they may wonder what's going on, and you can tell them that you're not feeling well.
• Show that you are impatient, maybe even irritable, and really want to sleep. However, don't appear too irritable either, because you need your parents' sympathy, not punishment from them for being rude!

Step 5. Wake up in the middle of the night

Wake yourself and your parents from sleep around 1am, and let them know if you don't feel well.

• If you pretend to have a stomach ache, tell them you've just vomited (leave your fake vomit in the toilet).
• Force yourself to cry (if you can) to make yourself look really sick. Try to pretend to be real crying! Imagine your favorite pet dies or a sad event so you can cry.
• For flu symptoms or strep throat, cough as hard as you can to clear your throat so it can be heard from their room. Rub your face right before they come in to check on you so it looks red and looks like real pain.

Step 6. Stay awake all night

That way, your eye bags will enlarge and you have a strong reason to skip school. Purple or black eyeshadow can also make your eyes look puffy.

• Go to bed an hour or two later than your usual time of sleep. The next day, your eyes may appear a little puffy or slightly puffy.
• Try to sleep for at least 4 hours if you don't want to feel weak from lack of sleep on your school holiday tomorrow.

Part 2 of 5: Reinforcing Morning Pain Symptoms

Step 1. Get up before your parents wake up, and pretend to vomit silently

Put fake vomit into the toilet and pretend to vomit. If this sound of vomiting doesn't wake them up, go to their room and tell them what "happened."

Step 2. Seems reluctant when getting ready to go to school

Don't show enthusiasm to get ready for school, act as if this is a tough task for you to do.

• Prepare for school slowly, but not too late. Unbutton one of your buttons, don't comb your hair, and don't tie your shoelaces properly (or don't tie them at all).
• Wet your eyes. Imagine something sad and let your eyes water and cry. You can also rub it so it looks a little red.

Step 3. Create fake eye bags

Even if you didn't get enough sleep last night, and you don't have natural eye bags, there's an easy way to fake it.

• Pick up a bright lavender or bluish eyeshadow that you or your mother have.
• Mix it with a little water so the color looks more natural.
• Blend it under your eyes until it's even but still clearly visible.
• You can also use petroleum jelly and rub it under your eyes.

Step 4. Eat less at breakfast

Loss of appetite is also a symptom of illness. Your parents will be very worried if you usually gobble up at breakfast, or if they prepare your favorite food.

Step 5. Don't agree to their advice to rest at home

When your parents have decided to let you not go to school, don't just nod and agree.

• Challenge their decision (but only if you don't have to try to convince them beforehand). This will confirm the fact that you are really sick.
• Answer, "But Mom, I have to study harder to replace it!" or "But there's a math test today!" If your parents find out that you don't care about tests, answer "But there's music practice, or art lessons" or something they know you like.
• Don't overreact. Don't answer if you want a math test if they know you don't care. Your answers could turn against you, unless you choose them carefully.

Part 3 of 5: Pretending to Have a Certain Disease

Step 1. Pretend you have a rash

An allergic reaction or rash from an infection can certainly make you rest at home.

• First, scratch your chest often until it turns bright red.
• Try scratching in a circular motion so that it looks like a real rash.
• Finally, try to combine the rash with other symptoms such as a runny nose or headache.

Step 2. Pretend to have a fever

If you pretend to be sick well, your parents will probably take your temperature. So be prepared to act fast and pretend to have a fever.

• Ask permission to go to the bathroom before they take your temperature.
• Be sure to bring a cup. Fill it with warm water for you to drink and rinse your mouth, especially under the tongue. This will increase the temperature in your mouth.
• Be sure to flush the toilet before turning on the faucet, so your parents won't suspect anything!
• Note: this method is only useful if your parents take your temperature by mouth, or under the tongue, of course. If the thermometer they use takes body temperature through the ear, try to warm your ear beforehand, by placing it near a warm object, such as a heater or a light bulb.
• If your parents usually just touch their hands to your forehead, rub your forehead repeatedly when they don't notice, or turn the hair dryer in your face and let them know your forehead feels warm.
• Place warm water on your armpits, forehead and cheeks. This method will make you feel warm and like you just sweated.
• Try to raise your body temperature above 37 degrees Celsius, but lower than 39.4 degrees Celsius. If your temperature is still below 37 degrees Celsius, then you don't have a fever, but if your temperature is higher than 39 degrees Celsius, it is likely that your parents will take you to the doctor immediately.

Step 3. Fake a migraine

Faking a migraine is very easy to do, because there's no way to check it's true. Just by pretending to have these symptoms, your parents will believe you.

• Distracted by light and sound. Pretend like the light and sound really bother you.
• Let them know that only part of your head hurts, for example above your eyebrows. This is especially important if you want to fake a migraine.
• Touch your forehead once in a while and frown.
• Let me know if you feel dizzy and your vision is a little blurry. When walking slowly, stop suddenly, close your eyes, and try to restore your balance by holding on to something or someone.
• Ask your parents to lower their voices when they speak.
• If you show these symptoms the day before skipping school, try to take a nap and turn off all the lights in your room, or if relaxing at home, turn off all the lights near you, and lie down on the couch.
• Ask your parents for medicine, but don't take it.

Step 4. Fake diarrhea

This method is very suitable for use, especially after breakfast.

• Running to the bathroom suddenly.
• Spend a long time in the bathroom, flushing the toilet, and spraying plenty of room deodorizer to disguise odors that aren't really there.
• You can also fake diarrhea.

Step 5. Fake eye pain

Eye pain is a very common disease, but it is also very contagious! You must be asked to rest at home if anyone thinks you have an eye sore.

• Take red lipstick and petroleum jelly, then rub them on the edge of one of your eyes.
• Make sure to only redden one eye, as eye pain usually doesn't affect both eyes at the same time.

Step 6. Fake a stomach ache, nausea, or cramping

Apart from what you say, the real symptom is vomiting, which you can also easily fake.

• After starting to eat, complain if you feel sick.
• When your parents aren't paying attention, stick your finger down your throat, but don't go too far, and you'll soon start making a gag sound but nothing. Do not use this method often, because it can hurt you.
• Prepare fake vomit to complete your excuse. Get some oatmeal and water, run to the bathroom, pop the oatmeal and water in your mouth, then spit it out in the tub and show it to your parents.
• You can also fake vomiting by pouring fake vomit on the floor (or even on the bed, which will make it even more convincing). In the morning, say you don't remember what happened and act like you're feeling guilty about whoever had to clean it up. Be careful if you ask someone else to clean it, because if he looks closely, he will probably realize that the vomit is fake.
• If you're a girl and you've started your period, tell your parents if you have cramps or if you're having your period. Your father probably won't talk about it any further, and your mother will understand. No one will suspect you.

Step 7. Pretend you have a cold or flu

Symptoms of colds and flu are very easy to imitate. The flu is a contagious disease, so your parents probably won't force you to go to school and pass it on to your friends.

• Blow your nose with a tissue, and throw it on your bedside table and/or bed. Your parents will think you have a cold and will keep you at home if you are sick like this.
• Breathe only through your mouth, as if your nose is blocked.
• If you don't sleep in the same room with them, and they ask you something, press your nose a little while answering.
• Wear clothes in layers. This will make you appear shivering and cold.
• Sneeze loudly, then suck your nose in front of your parents. Don't just show these symptoms when you're in the same room with them, but do it from anywhere they can hear them.
• Stretch your lips to make them look chapped and twist your nose to make them look red.
• Tell them if your bones hurt or your whole body aches and pains.

Step 8. Pretend to have a sore throat

Be careful that you don't look like you have strep throat, as this could lead you to a doctor's office.

• When walking in the house, open your mouth so that your throat is dry.
• Avoid eating and drinking.
• Use red lozenges to make your throat appear red.
• Show a grimace face every time you swallow. Speak in a low, hoarse voice, and drink water frequently.
• Say if your throat feels a little itchy, or like swallowing glass.

Part 4 of 5: Pretending To Be Sick All Day

Step 1. Understand your parents' expectations

Chances are, your parents will check on you throughout the day to make sure you're not faking it, or check to see if your condition is improving.

• If your parents stay home with you, pretend to be asleep, and act naturally sick when they check on you.
• If your parents are working, you can call to let them know how you are. This will make you appear responsible and not appear to be having fun.
• If they call to check on you from work, wait for the phone to ring three and a half times before picking it up, and answer in the lowest possible voice.

Step 2. Show symptoms improve

If you are resting at home, pretend to sleep all day, and gradually improve.

• Around noon, eliminate a symptom or two of your illness.
• If you don't seem to be feeling better in the afternoon, your parents may take you to the doctor, who will know that you're not really sick.
• If you think your parents are going to take you to the doctor, try to stop being sick.

Step 3. Don't have fun

You should be resting at home because you're sick, right?

• Do not go or be caught out of the house. If your parents' neighbors or friends see you, they will probably tell you.
• Make sure to clear up all the games before your parents get home. If they see that you're having fun, they'll suspect that you're just faking it from the start.
• Delete your internet browsing history so they don't know that you spend all day online playing.

Part 5 of 5: Cheating School Teachers and Nurses

Step 1. Ask permission to go to the UKS

Depending on your school's regulations, ask your teacher for permission to go to UKS. At UKS there may be a school nurse who can usually spot students who are feigning illness easily. It's just that, you can still cheat him if you come to the UKS at two different times of the day.

• Wait one to two hours for class to start, then ask permission to go to the bathroom.
• After spending more time than usual, go back to class and tell your teacher that you've just vomited and ask for permission to go to the UKS.

Step 2. Ask the school nurse for permission to just lie down

Start asking permission for simple things, rather than immediately saying "I want to go home."

• When you go to the UKS for the first time, say that you feel unwell, dizzy, and want to rest.
• Ask permission to rest for a while before returning to class. This will make it seem like you have no intention of going home, and are still trying to continue studying at school and not pretending to be sick.

Step 3. Pretend to sleep

This will make your complaints sound real and make you look really sick.

• Don't overdo it to pretend you're snoring, try covering your face with a blanket or pillow instead.
• This will also make you look like you're sensitive to light (a migraine symptom), and like you're trying to sleep.

Step 4. Cheat any health check

The school nurse may ask you to undergo several examinations to confirm your complaint.

• If the school nurse wants to take your blood pressure, hold your breath while she takes it. This can help lower your blood pressure, making you really sick.
• Tell the school nurse that you are vomiting; he probably wouldn't doubt it.
• The school nurse may also take your temperature. Be prepared to have your temperature checked using an oral thermometer by gargling hot water before seeing him, or by going for a jog to raise your temperature and make you feel like you have a fever.

Step 5. Come to the UKS one more time

If the school nurse asks you to come back to class, don't worry! This means you just have to drop out of class and come there one more time, and this time, you're definitely allowed to go home!

• Say you've tried, but still don't feel well, and are "too weak to concentrate on the lesson." This is the perfect excuse!
• Say if you feel some flu symptoms, nausea, etc., as above.
• Explain briefly. There is no need to overdo it by exaggerating or mentioning too many symptoms of the disease. Say you're "weak," "dizzy," and "can't concentrate on class, because you're sick."

• You might be tempted to ask him to contact your parents, but do not!

  . This is a sign that you just want to go home and not really get sick.

Tips

• If you have makeup at home, use a pale foundation and dab some black eyeshadow under your eyes. Pink can make you look sick too.
• If you want to drop out of school, eat something you don't like and tell your teacher that you ate something stale.
• If your parents hold your arm, and ask how you feel, answer that it feels cold, not warm.
• The last resort that can be tried, which may be suitable for you who are more mature: drink a lot of coffee every day? If you really want to pretend you're sick, don't drink caffeinated drinks the day before or in the morning. If you rely heavily on caffeine, this can lead to headaches and nausea. The pluses: You might get really sick, so there's good reason to skip. However, the downside is that you "really" feel sick. So this method is not suitable if you plan to do something while skipping, although this method will definitely work if you just want to avoid exams or lectures.
• Read this article on how parents can spot their child who is feigning illness, so you can learn how to counter their technique. Keep in mind that the article contains a link to this page, so even parents can find out how their kids are pretending to be sick!
• Don't beg too much to rest at home, or your parents will find out that you're just pretending.
• If your parents aren't fooled by any of the methods here, give them a call while you're still at school. It's more reassuring if you come to school, and then say you can't stand the pain (perfect if you just want to avoid a test, for example).
• If you're faking the flu, say that you need Vick's Vaporub to ease the pain. The smell will make you look sick convincingly. Rubbing Vick's up your nose can make you look really sick.
• Also make sure to clear web browsing history. Don't bookmark pages or download anything to your computer, your parents will notice you're doing all this when you "should be sick".
• Be careful what you say. Try not to overdo it. Say something like "Ah, I have a stomach ache, it hurts so bad." You will gain sympathy and possibly be allowed to rest at home. But if you say "I'm not feeling well, maybe I ate the wrong thing." Then people would ask "Where did you eat? Should I call the doctor? Has the food gone stale?" And soon enough, you'll be found out.
• If your parents find out you're just pretending, prepare a good sad story, for example, you're stressed out at school or having trouble with people. They won't be too angry if they know you're in trouble.
• Don't tell anyone that you're pretending to be sick, because even your friends might tell their parents, and their parents will tell yours.
• Get to know your parents. If both your parents were doctors, they would be very hard to fool.
• Pull your lower eyelid until it hurts when you blink; your eyes will water.
• Burp in front of your parents, and tell them they taste like rotten eggs, which is a sign of stomach flu.
• If you refused to be sent home from your previous school, your teacher would easily believe you too.
• Avoid feigning illness multiple times in a narrow span of time. Try to keep some distance between them, so your parents won't suspect anything.
• Drink hot tea, wear a thick blanket, and suck cough tablets. You can also say that your ears are clogged.
• Don't pretend to be sick too often, you can fake it at most once every 3 months or your parents will suspect it.
• When you have a fever, you will usually have chills and chills. Put on a thick blanket and show them you feel cold to reassure them.
• Show that you're feeling sluggish and lethargic, and turn a hairdryer on your head so it's warm.
• Don't overdo it - your parents will notice, so be careful.
• Makeup can help you. Mix Vaseline and pale green eyeshadow, rub it under your nose. This will make you look like you're going to throw up.
• One way to pretend you're sick is to stay up all night reading or playing a game and then say you're tired and have a headache. Staying up all night will make you more reassuring when pretending to be sick.
• Turn on the hairdryer on your forehead. This will make him feel warm.
• Wait until your parent, friend, or sibling is sick, and imitate the symptoms. This will make it appear as if you have contracted their disease.
• Start complaining of feeling sick since the night before, then repeat it again in the morning.

Warning

• Viruses usually only survive for about 24 hours. Don't pretend to have a stomach ache from the virus any longer than this time.
• Too often pretending to be sick can make your parents lose trust. So when you really need to rest at home, they won't believe it. Even if you're only caught pretending to be sick once, you won't be trusted again, even if you really are (remember the story of the shepherd and the wolf?)
• Don't pretend you have a urinary tract infection (pretend to urinate frequently, and feel a stinging sensation when you urinate). Since this is a serious condition, your parents will take you to the doctor even if you say the symptoms have subsided. There, you will likely be given antibiotics which are quite expensive (if not covered by insurance) and may make you feel nauseous. Antibiotics may also cause yeast infections that are uncomfortable in women.
• Don't pretend to be sick for more than 3 days. Your parents might take you to the doctor and you'll be found out.
• If your parents give you painkillers or other medications, don't take them even if they notice you. Just say that you are fine, because taking medicine when you are not sick will actually make you sick. If you do end up taking the drug, make sure to get it out of your mouth, or if you do swallow it, don't hide it from your parents. The thing you need to remember is that you can take cough medicine lozenges like Degirol even if you're not really sick, just don't take more than 10 tablets a day.
• Don't skip school for up to a week. If you overdo it, your fun of skipping school will be ruined by having to catch up on lessons at school. The best days to skip are Friday (because after that there are Saturdays and Sundays for fun) or Monday (since Mondays are usually the worst days).
• Don't pretend to have the same illness over and over again, and don't pretend to be sick too soon. Your parents will immediately suspect it.
• Do not suddenly improve, this is very suspicious. Explain gradually that two of your symptoms are improving.
• Under no circumstances should you swallow the medicine and then vomit it up. No drug is completely safe, everything has side effects. Even over-the-counter medications can harm you if you're not really sick. Throw away any medicine given to you. Self-inducing vomiting is also a dangerous act, which can cause stomach, esophageal, and dental upset.
• If you skip school to avoid something, it will only annoy you in the future. Take a deep breath, mentally prepare, and remember that everything will end when the doorbell rings. Overcome your fears and anxieties, then step into school.