Knowing yourself is an important aspect of enjoying a peaceful and happy life. In order to get to know yourself as best you can, identify the qualities that make you unique. In addition, doing reflection and meditation every day is the right way to know your identity. Over time, you'll be able to use all the information you get to build a close and meaningful relationship with yourself.
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Method 1 of 3: Learn to Understand Yourself
Step 1. Be honest with yourself
Knowing yourself means accepting the various aspects that make up your identity, personality, and being. This step helps you to know all aspects of your personality, not to criticize yourself. Be prepared to learn new things about you.
- When evaluating yourself, pay attention to the things that make you feel uncomfortable. This feeling can be a sign that you are avoiding something. Do you have a trait that needs to be improved? If so, what needs to be done to change it?
- For example, if you don't like yourself in the mirror, find out why. Is it because of your appearance or your age? Determine if the trigger can be resolved.
Step 2. Ask yourself wise questions
This will help you determine what makes you happy or depressed. In addition, you can use the information obtained to pass the time by doing useful activities or achieving goals. Answer the following questions.
- What is your hobby?
- What is your goal or goal in life?
- What do you want to inherit?
- What do you like least about yourself?
- What mistakes have you made?
- What are other people's perceptions of you? What perception do you expect from them?
- Who is your role model?
Step 3. Listen carefully to your inner voice
Your inner voice expresses your feelings and beliefs. The inner voice will speak when something upsetting or pleasant happens. Learn to listen to your inner voice. What do you want to convey to you? What is the message about other people around you?
- Stand in front of the mirror describing yourself. You can say it verbally or silently. Do you say positive or negative things about yourself? Are you focused on appearance or action? Do you think about success or failure?
- When negative thoughts arise, do not continue. Instead, ask yourself why do you think that way? Criticizing or criticizing yourself indicates that you are defending yourself against unpleasant thoughts.
- Positive or negative thoughts indicate how you perceive yourself. If your self-image isn't what you want it to be, try to improve yourself or learn to behave in a positive way.
Step 4. Keep a journal every day
Journaling helps you to know your motivations, emotions, and beliefs. In this way, you will be able to make wise decisions. Set aside a few minutes a day to write down everything you do, feel, and think throughout the day. If something negative happens, write down why the experience affected you. If you make a mistake, determine how to live your life by doing the right thing.
- Find certain patterns through diaries. After some time, you will notice certain needs and wants that come up over and over again.
- Write down everything that comes to mind. Handwriting can reveal subconscious thoughts so that you can determine which thoughts are triggering the problem.
- In addition, you can use questions as a guide for journaling, such as those that ask you to describe certain aspects of your personality or habits.
Step 5. Learn to focus on your everyday life
When you focus your attention, you fully experience what is going on so that you are able to become aware of every thought that arises and the action you take. In addition to regular meditation, you need to practice being able to focus your attention. The most important thing about this practice is the ability to focus on yourself and the life you are living.
- Take time to calm your mind and observe the sensations experienced by the five senses. What do you touch, taste, hear, see and smell?
- Do not eat food while staring at a computer screen or television. Allocate special time to eat while enjoying the taste of the food, its texture, the temperature of the air in the dining room, and the sensation that arises every time you chew food.
- Set aside a few minutes a day just to rest and observe the atmosphere around you. Try to pay attention to as many sensations as possible. What do you hear, taste, taste and smell?
- When an emotional response occurs, ask yourself why you are experiencing it and what triggers it.
Step 6. Describe your appearance
Write down adjectives that describe how you look. When you're done, read it again while determining whether your notes are positive or negative. If you describe your physical appearance in a negative light, think about how you value your body. Respect for your body enables you to appreciate other aspects of everyday life.
- Turn negative perceptions of yourself into positive ones. For example, if a mole on your chin makes you feel inferior, consider it attractive. Remember that many actresses have moles that make them look more attractive.
- Try to change the unpleasant things that can be changed. For example, if you're feeling insecure because of your breakouts, talk to a dermatologist or learn how to apply makeup to cover up your pimples.
Method 2 of 3: Improving Personality
Step 1. Realize your role in everyday life
Everyone has several roles in daily life, for example in the family, at work, and in society. After writing down all of your roles, explain what each role means to you, for example as:
- Parent
- Friend
- Team leader
- Emotional support
- Mentor/student
- Secret holder
- Creator
- Solution provider
Step 2. Write down the positive things (VITALS) you have
VITALS stands for values (priority values), interests (interests), temperaments (personality), activities (activities), life goals (life goals), and strengths (strengths). Use a notebook or Word program to record positive things about yourself in that category.
- Vital values: For you, what are the values that should be upheld? What are some qualities that you value in yourself and in others? What motivates you to do something?
- Interests: What are the things that spark curiosity? What do you do to fill your spare time? What amazes you?
- Personality: write 10 words that describe your personality.
- Activity: What do you do all day? What activities do you like and dislike the most in your daily life? Do you have a daily routine?
- Life goals: What events do you consider most important? Why? What do you want to achieve in the next 5 years? 10 years from now?
- Strengths: What are your abilities, skills and talents? What are your skills?
Step 3. Answer the personality assessment test questions
While personality tests are not scientific in nature, the questions they ask require you to think about the various aspects that make up your character. Some reputable websites offer personality tests, for example:
- Meyers-Brigg Type Indicator
- Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory (MMPI)
- Predictive Index Behavioral Assessment
- Big 5 Personality Assessment
Step 4. Ask other people for feedback
Don't build your self-image based on other people's opinions, but their opinions help you find out things about yourself that you didn't realize.
- Ask loved ones to tell them what your personality or character is like.
- If needed, also ask your boss, mentor, or friends.
- You don't have to take other people's opinion of you for granted! The comments don't define who you are and perhaps more people will accept you for who you are.
Step 5. Compare the life satisfaction you feel with the results achieved
After evaluating your personality and traits, use the knowledge gained to determine whether you are capable of self-respect. Is your current condition in line with your values and personality? If the answer is yes, determine how to develop yourself according to your current personality. If not, determine how to improve your personality and life.
- Use your strengths to feel happiness. For example, if you enjoy being creative and doing crafts, take an art course or learn how to make a craft you love.
- If you want to improve your personality, use what you already know about yourself to build a personal plan. For example, if you find out that you are an introvert, but want to make more friends, start socializing by joining a small group. Sharing time with others helps you enjoy a fun social life.
Method 3 of 3: Meeting Your Needs
Step 1. Take care of your health
You do not have time to reflect if you continue to experience stress and busy working. Make sure you still have time to take care of yourself from the physical and mental aspects. This step allows you to accept yourself as you are.
- Get some exercise every day, for example by doing 20 minutes of aerobics or a leisurely walk in the park.
- Get used to sleep 7-9 hours every day.
- Adopt a healthy diet with most meals consisting of fresh fruits and vegetables and whole grains.
- Set aside time to relax each day, for example by meditating or doing fun activities, such as knitting, doing crossword puzzles, or reading your favorite book.
Step 2. Balance work and personal life
Do not value yourself based solely on position or work performance. While a job is worth being proud of, you need to enjoy time outside of your work life. Don't take office work home. Set aside time each day to focus on achieving other goals, enjoying hobbies, and doing things that interest you.
- Work is important, but make sure you also prioritize your well-being.
- Set boundaries at work so work doesn't get in the way of other relationships. For example, don't reply to emails that aren't urgent outside of business hours.
Step 3. Set boundaries when in a relationship
Understanding one's own limitations makes relationships feel more enjoyable. Determine what interactions make you feel uncomfortable, depressed, or disappointed and use them to set personal boundaries.
- Ask yourself what situations make you feel uncomfortable. For example, do you not like being around people? Do certain jokes bother you?
- Think about whether someone is being too demanding or forcing you to do something unpleasant. Refuse requests or demands against your will.
Step 4. Set a life goal that makes you feel happy
Having a goal helps you achieve what you dream of. Set some goals that will help you achieve your life's dreams. Make sure you set happy goals, not based on external motives, such as money or prestige.
- For example, start writing a book with a goal of writing 500 words per day. Do this because you love writing, not because you want to be a famous writer.
- Set personal goals that are easy to achieve, such as improving your cake decorating skills before the new year.
- If you want to reach a very high end goal, set some intermediate goals that will help you achieve it. For example, if you dream of taking a vacation around Europe, make a plan so that you start saving, buying tickets, and making travel plans.
Step 5. Adjust your wants and needs periodically
Every now and then, reflect by evaluating your life. Have your desires changed? Did something new happen that you need to change your priorities? Knowing yourself is a continuous process. Like an old friend, don't stop trying to find out about yourself.
- Read the diary as an evaluation material to find out if there has been a change in habits or priorities.
- After a major change in your daily life, such as changing jobs or moving house, you need to do an evaluation because routines, habits, and needs usually change too.
- If certain habits or tendencies don't support the achievement of your goals or goals, just stop! Replace it with useful activities that help you achieve your life goals.
