Everyone has experienced problems at some point in their life. Sometimes, problems happen because of your fault, but sometimes you have to fall victim to unwarranted accusations. Whatever the situation, there are many things you can do to escape problems, punishments, and dangerous situations. Whoever you are, try the various communication techniques in this article to ease the tension that builds up!
Step
Method 1 of 2: Removing Yourself from Problems with Parents
Step 1. Be honest and sincere
Trust me, doing so will instantly restore your positivity in the eyes of your parents! In other words, doing so can reassure your parents that you are not at fault, or at the very least, that you are sorry for what you did wrong. Therefore, don't go against their words or constantly complain because neither action will win their hearts!
Step 2. Avoid stress signals
Stress signals are verbal and nonverbal cues that many people associate with lying.
- Look your parents in the eye when you speak. Don't look in any direction! Even though eye movement has been shown to be unrelated to a person's honesty, many people still think the two things have a strong correlation.
- Do not be nervous. Be careful, the nervousness will show if you are constantly moving your hands, making awkward postures, tucking your hair behind your ears, etc. Instead, try sitting on your hands or clenching your palms to make your nervousness less visible.
- Recall a time when you felt strong and in control. Doing so will undoubtedly affect how others perceive you! For example, by returning to a moment when you felt successful and/or cunning, you are indirectly persuading others to think you are.
Step 3. Begin the sentence by saying, “Yes, I agree that…
This method of communication shows that you are willing to cooperate, not defend yourself. End the sentence with something specific to let him know that you are really listening to their words.
Step 4. Don't lie
Trust me, lying will only complicate your situation even more! You don't want to be caught up in a lie that's already been told or caught cheating on them, do you?
Step 5. Involve emotion in everything you say
Instead of expressing feelings in a passive-aggressive way, or not expressing them at all, try to package them in complete sentences. For example, you could say, "I'm sorry Mom, I'm embarrassed that I did that" or "I feel guilty for doing that."
Step 6. Show your empathy
Understanding the parent's point of view can open up various spaces in the conversation process between you and them, you know! After listening to their point of view, it will help you to adapt your statement to the root of the problem.
- For example, if you accidentally break a window, chances are that their anger is not rooted in the action, but in your decision not to raise the issue right away. Or, their financial condition may not be good so that the problem makes them even more stressed.
- Find the root of their annoyance, which may differ from your understanding. Remember, what triggers their anger may differ from your understanding, but understanding them is key to making more empathetic statements.
- Referring to the window example, instead of saying, "Sorry I broke the window," or "I didn't mean to do that," try talking to them by raising their concerns. For example, you could say, "I should have told you as soon as the window was broken" or "I know Mom and Dad are spending a lot, so I'll immediately pay for it with my pocket money, okay?"
Step 7. Seduce or compliment them
In addition to being friendly and polite, don't hesitate to compliment them, especially if you haven't done so much in the past. Trust me, doing so will open up lucrative opportunities for you! For example, you could say, "I know Mom and Dad must be tired of hearing this after a busy day at work" or "I'm sorry I did this even though Mom and Dad have done so much for me."
Step 8. Offer to make amends for your mistake
This idea is actually very effective because it will show your initiative to improve the situation, something your parents probably won't offer. Apart from that, it can also be used to bend the situation and show your regret. Referring to the window example, you can offer to donate money as a form of compensation or clean windows for an entire month.
Method 2 of 2: Removing Yourself from Problems with Authority Figures
Step 1. Begin the sentence by saying, “Yes, I agree that…” This method of communication shows that you are willing to cooperate, not defend yourself
End the sentence with something specific to let him know that you were really listening to him.
Step 2. Try to lighten the mood
Try cracking jokes, not to make everyone laugh, but to melt the tension that has built up. In addition, joking also indicates that you are not afraid of the situation. However, make sure your joke doesn't cross the line and end up offending the person, okay?
Step 3. Seduce him
Remember, everyone loves to hear compliments. So why don't you give it a try? Make sure you give compliments that are friendly and polite, but not overly so that they don't sound like fakes. Remember, flirting isn't just about complimenting! In some cases, you also need to lower your personal ego and make the person feel superior, such as, "Wow, your uniform is awesome! I've always wanted to be a police officer, you know, when I grow up."
Step 4. Change the focus of the conversation
If you're in trouble, chances are that the person who spotted the situation will focus on making you uncomfortable. Therefore, try to return the focus of the conversation to him so that the situation returns to neutral and the control is no longer in his hands. Again, do this casually and naturally. In other words, don't suddenly turn your back on him!
Step 5. Convey the benefits that the figure will get if they are willing to “let go” you
Try to convince him that he will benefit if he is willing to get you out of trouble. Instead of asserting your wish, which is to get out of trouble, explicitly, try to choose a diction that makes them want to make that wish come true. For example, “Ugh, you have to waste time writing a ticket. Do you think there is another solution that is faster and we can agree on now, right?"
Step 6. Raise the relationship you have with the figure
Can you find the common thread that binds the two of you? For example, you may both come from the same city, have mutual friends, or even know each other well. Take advantage of the relationship to remind him that you are not a stranger to him. This will increase his empathy for you, so chances are he won't have the heart to get you into trouble.
Step 7. Admit the lesser accusation
Remember, the main accusation you still have to deny! However, research shows that someone who is willing to admit a lesser accusation is more likely to be trusted than someone who denies the whole accusation. Therefore, try saying, "I did play in a skateboard-free area, but that doesn't mean I was skateboarding at the time" or, "I have skateboarded here before, but that was years ago, really. when I was little and didn't really understand the rules."
