It's an old dilemma - a man and a woman are best friends and then, suddenly, there's a small but strong hunch that one (or both) partners want something more. You want to know if your boyfriend likes you? By paying attention to signs of affection, looking for changes in your relationship, and asking people questions, you can begin to get a sense of whether or not your friend is harboring hidden feelings. See Step 1 below to get started.
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Method 1 of 3: Finding Signs of Affection
Step 1. Look for timidity
In romantic films, the male lead is usually very passionate and confident. In real life, guys are often shy, nervous and self-doubt - just like everyone else! If you suspect that your guy friend likes you, looking for shy signs is a good place to start. Does your friend seem very nervous around you? Does his laugh sound forced or unnatural? Does he seem to be trying to always laugh and smile around you, even when nothing is funny? This is a sign that your boyfriend is worried about what you think of him!
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Here are some things to look for:
- Blush/red face
- Awkwardness in conversation
- Slight reluctance or hesitation when saying "goodbye"
Step 2. Look for suspicious eye contact
People with great liking have a hard time taking their eyes off the person who stole their heart. Does your boyfriend seem to be looking you in the eye more than usual? Does he always smile when he sees you looking back at him? Eyes are said to be windows to the soul - even if your guy friend is too shy to admit his affections, his eyes might blow it all away.
People who can't take their eyes off the person they like usually realize when it's too late. If you catch your guy friend looking at you and he looks embarrassed or pretends to be looking the other way, you may have caught him in a moment of heartfelt covetousness
Step 3. Look for cult body language
Hidden love usually has a visible effect on a man's thoughts and behavior, subtly and subconsciously changing the way he uses his body. Does your boyfriend's body language make it seem like he's paying attention to you, no matter the situation? In other words, does he always face you when he talks to you? Does he seem to "straighten up" when he sees you? Does he pull his shoulders back or use his arms to lean against a nearby wall when talking to you? This body language may indicate feelings of hidden affection.
Step 4. Watch for "accidental" touches
This is one of the oldest tricks! Many men with hidden passions will use any opportunity to touch the woman they love. They'll hug a lot, they'll always be the one to get you something you can't reach, they'll "accidentally" bump into you while walking, and so on. If your boyfriend is suddenly "touching" more than usual, you can be sure that he has hidden feelings.
Sometimes guys in love will even "design" situations where they have to touch you. If your boyfriend, for example, seems more clumsy around you and has a habit of dropping objects, pay attention to what happens when you pick him up and give him away - does he gently touch your hand?
Step 5. See if he's trying to be "near" you or "away" from you
Boy friends who secretly like their girlfriends usually want to be around her as much as possible. Often, male friends who have hidden feelings of affection will (consciously or unconsciously) tend to approach him - standing close to him at social events, sitting close to him at meals, etc. However, sometimes, a man can be "very" shy. In this case, even though he longs for his friend, his presence makes him so nervous that he will find a way to "no" to her. Pay attention to your boyfriend's habits - if you're always around or away from you when you're with a group of people, you'll know something's up.
Method 2 of 3: Analyzing Your Relationship
Step 1. See if he makes time with you a special priority
If your guy friend likes you, spending time with you will be one of his favorite things. He will want to be with you as much as possible and sometimes even cancel other plans to do so. If your guy friend suddenly calls you often to see what you're doing and find out if you're busy every day, you may be dealing with a boyfriend who is in love.
Step 2. Pay attention to what you are talking about together
A guy with a big crush on a girl friend will sometimes offend him subtly in conversation. They do this in a number of ways. Some try to steer the conversation towards romantic topics, asking questions about who their girlfriend likes and whether she is looking for someone. Others will want to talk about courtship itself, for example, joking about the ridiculousness of most couples. Pay attention to the type of conversation you have with your boyfriend - if it's mostly about romance or dating, even if he doesn't indicate that he's interested in dating you, this may be his way of signaling his interest.
There are very clear exceptions to this rule. If your guy friend involves you in his love life by asking for advice about other girls, it's usually a sign that he sees you as a casual friend
Step 3. Find seduction
Some men are not as shy as others. A very confident guy may even like to seduce you openly. If your boyfriend has a habit of making fun of you, make silly sarcasm. or likes to shock you, this shows that, at least, he "had thought" of you as more than a friend.
Realize that a man's intentions can be a little vague when he's flirting. Many men are used to flirting, and make the seduction a joke if the seduction is not reciprocated. However, some use seduction and innuendo as a form of playfulness. However, persistent and repeated flirting is usually a sign of something more
Step 4. Know the "fake date" when it occurs
Guys who want to date their girlfriends sometimes create a dating atmosphere when out with her. Be aware of this - when you meet your boyfriend for a meal, does he seem more "formal" than usual? For example, if he is usually vulgar and talkative, does he become more quiet and introverted? Was he suddenly so polite? Does he insist on paying for your food? If so, your guy friend might ask you out on a "fake date" by trying to make the real thing a possibility.
Also, pay attention to where he takes you and how he dresses. If he takes you to a fancier and "nice" place than his usual place and he "grooms up" his appearance, you'll know you're on a fake date
Step 5. See how he treats other women
This is one of the most important things to look at when trying to determine if your guy friend likes you, but it's something that often goes unnoticed. If you think that your boyfriend is showing you affection, before drawing your own conclusions, pay attention to how he interacts with other women. If he behaves the same way with other women as you do, you may be dealing with a natural flirt or an extrovert, not a secret admirer.
Listen when your guy friends talk to you about other girls. As noted earlier, if he's openly asking for advice on how to attract other girls, he's "likely" not seeing you as more than a friend. However, if he seems dissatisfied with other women, complaining that he can't find the right person, this may be his way of signaling that he is interested in you
Method 3 of 3: Asking Others
Step 1. Ask a friend
Finding out if your guy friend likes you or not doesn't have to be a guess - one great way to jump right into the fray is to simply ask someone close to him! Most boy friend groups talk about the person they like each other. If your guy friend likes you, chances are that one of his friends knows about it.
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If you can, you'd better find a friend you both know - someone close to you" and "your boy friend." Not only can this person provide helpful advice and help you plan your next move, but because he's (hopefully) loyal to you, he's unlikely to reveal your secret.
On the other hand, asking someone who's friends with your boyfriend's friends and "no" with you can be riskier. There's a good chance with this option that the person you're asking will tell your crush friend what you asked about it. This can be lucky for you if you want your guy friend to know that you are interested in him too, however, if you don't, this could backfire
Step 2. Ask your guy friend
If you're very confident, the simplest and most direct way to determine if he likes you is to ask him directly. This can be overwhelming, but, usually, the temporary stress of talking about your feelings openly is well worth knowing for sure whether your guy friend likes you or not. When you ask your guy friend if he likes you, make sure you're in a private place, because most guys are shy about talking about their feelings in front of other people.
Some guys, unfortunately, are also shy about talking about their feelings in front of "you." If you ask your guy friend directly if he likes you and he says no, but he still flirts with you and shows affection, you may find a guy who is shy about expressing his feelings for "anyone." There's not much you can do in this case. Just live your life and do what you want to do and in the end, this guy will either gain confidence or not
Step 3. If it turns out that you both like each other, ask him out
If you find out that your guy friend likes you from one of his friends or from a guy friend of yours, and you know you like him back, you have no reason not to ask him out. This will likely happen naturally once you both find out that you like each other. Enjoy your first date - since you're already friends, you can skip the awkward pleasantries and enjoy your time together as a new couple!
In our society, there is an unspoken stereotype that men should ask women out and not the other way around. If your boyfriend likes you but is shy about asking you out, don't be afraid to ignore this age-old tradition! There's no reason that you should wait for happiness until you're asked to date the "right" way, especially if the "right" way is an heirloom of an earlier, more formal age
Tips
- Good luck! And don't force him if he just wants to be friends!
- If he drops a pencil or something and gives it to you, does he try to touch your finger? (Specifically).
