We all must be worried about something. Money, health, and social relationships are three things that are often at the top of a person's list of worries. We all worry about the people we care about, and that's normal. But at some point, you will realize that worrying can turn into something unhealthy, even unproductive. Worrying about something excessively prone to make you suffer from stress, anxiety, insomnia, and other health problems. If you find yourself worrying too much about yourself and the people you care about, there are a few methods worth applying. Change your habit of worrying about everything, your life will be happier.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Dealing With Anxiety Right Now
Step 1. Compile a list of concerns
Whenever you have an anxiety attack, write down your anxiety on a piece of paper. Tell yourself, “I don't have time to think about it right now. I will write it down and think about it later.” There will always be a time and place to worry about yourself and the people you care about. No need to be afraid to forget, after all your worries have been recorded in the list.
Step 2. Determine the period of concern
Choose a specific time and location to worry about anything that's bothering you. Allow and free yourself to worry only at those times every day. Remember, it is your period of worry. You are free to think anything in the moment, however unproductive your thoughts may be; no need to limit yourself.
- If negative thoughts about yourself and your family arise outside of this period, try to ignore them. Tell yourself that you will think about it again later, right in your period of worry. Don't worry, this step will feel easier if you do it often.
- Set the same time each day (for example, from five-thirty to five in the afternoon).
- Set a time that is a bit far from your nightly bedtime, make sure the anxiety does not interfere with your sleep time.
- Most importantly, learn to stop worrying when your worry period is over. Get up and do positive things that can help divert your fears and anxieties.
Step 3. Keep yourself busy
Whenever worry creeps into your mind, revisit your to-do list. If you don't have one, start making one. Make a list of all your goals and also list what you need to do to achieve them.
- Start with simple activities, such as cooking dinner or doing the laundry.
- Try to focus on one activity. Don't do many things at once.
Method 2 of 3: Coping With Your Worry
Step 1. Improve your ability to manage uncomfortable, difficult, and negative emotions
Think about how you would react if something bad happened to your family - would you panic and rush to try and stop your fears and anxieties? Are you actually trying to "run away" from the feeling or bury the feeling deep? Are you doing destructive actions? Increasing your tolerance level for such negative feelings can help you manage them in a positive way later on.
- In fact, worrying is one way for people to distract themselves from distressing emotions. If you're busy worrying about bad things that might happen to your family, you're actually trying to distract yourself from those emotions without realizing it. It could be that your worries are a "powerful weapon" that you use to avoid things you can't control.
- When faced with troubling feelings, learn to calm down. When you start worrying about your family, find out what you can do to better manage those emotions. It's not that you have to run away from those emotions; but try to minimize the intensity of the emotion so that it is easier for you to deal with.
- Try doing some of these things: Exercising, dancing, cleaning the house, listening to relaxing music, observing art or something beautiful, playing with pets, playing games, watching favorite TV shows, volunteering, taking a warm bath or bath, praying, read books, laugh, sing, and travel to comfortable and relaxing places.
- Identify things or activities that can make you feel better. Also identify things or activities that actually have the opposite effect (such as eating too much, isolating yourself in the room, etc.).
Step 2. Learn to accept uncertainty
Often, people feel productive when they're worried about something. You might think, being too aware of everything that “may” happen to your family will enable you to protect them from any of these possibilities. Unfortunately, that won't happen. Life remains unpredictable; You are just wasting your time and energy, because you know that life is full of uncertainty.
- Realize that worrying about the worst ("What if my dad gets cancer and dies?" "What if my plane crashes?") has no power to prevent these things from happening.
- Ask yourself: Is it possible for life to be free from uncertainty? Does worrying about something constantly benefit me? Are these worries preventing me from enjoying my daily life? Can I accept the fact that such terrible things might happen, but the percentage is so small?
Step 3. Learn to habituate
In other words, learn to get used to your worries. For 30 minutes, think about the things that often worry you - for example, your family member died in a car accident - and accept the feelings that arise in that moment, instead of trying to avoid or hide them.
- The main purpose of habituation practice is to calm your anxiety and make it easier for you to enter the acceptance stage. Habituation will also help you distinguish between issues you can and cannot control.
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Ask yourself these questions recommended by HelpGuide.org:
- Is the problem really I've had recently and not a product of my imagination? If the problem only stems from the thought of “what if…”, how often does that possibility actually materialize?
- Are my concerns reasonable?
- Can I do something to solve the problem? Can I prepare myself to tackle the problem? Or is the matter beyond my control?
- If you realize that nothing can be done to prevent your family from being injured or killed in an accident (or other concern), learn to accept the uncertainty of the situation. Remember, worrying is not a real action. Worrying about a car accident will not prevent it from happening.
- If you think the problem can be solved, try to understand the root of the problem, think of the most appropriate solution, and come up with a concrete plan to address the problem; Don't just drown in worries.
Step 4. Talk to an expert counselor or psychologist
Talking to a mental health professional is not your last resort. Sometimes, simply sharing your concern with people who are not directly connected to the issue can be very helpful. Browse the internet or ask for local recommendations for relevant expert counselors or psychologists in your area.
Step 5. Cry
One powerful way to wash away all negative emotions is to cry. Research shows that after a person cries, their heart rate and breathing rate slows down, then they enter a state of relaxation. This stage tends to last longer than the time you spent crying. So if you're really worried that you want to cry, cry.
- Cry alone or in front of your friends.
- Make sure you're in the right place (shaming yourself won't help you).
Step 6. Call your friends
Your friends can be great supporters. They can provide a different perspective and help you dive into yours. They can help you understand whether your fears are justified or not. Communicating your fears to someone you can trust can really do wonders for your anxiety.
- Setting up a “communication schedule” might help, such as calling one friend per week.
- If you can't call them, communicate via email.
Method 3 of 3: Making Lifestyle Changes
Step 1. Reduce stress
There's nothing you can do to make your life completely stress-free, but at least you can implement the steps below to reduce it.
- Learn to say "no". When your friend invites you out for dinner, don't say yes if you know you'll be busy all night or have to work late. Learn to distinguish between the things you “should” and “should” do.
- Change your situation. Do you often feel stressed when you arrive at the office because you have to first deal with extraordinary traffic jams? If so, try choosing another route, taking the train, or leaving early to avoid traffic jams. Make small changes that can improve your life and the environment around you; surely, your stress will decrease slowly.
- Spend less time with people who often stress you. You may not be able to completely remove them from your life - especially if those people are your mother, your boss, or your co-workers - but try to limit communication with these people as much as you can. For example, tell your mother that you can't call her every day, but that at least once a week you will definitely call her. Avoid annoying coworkers as much as you can. Find reasons to keep them out of your sight.
Step 2. Meditate
Meditation is not just sitting and emptying the mind. Meditation is like watching your thoughts wander without judging them. Amazingly, meditating for a few minutes every day can significantly reduce your anxiety levels.
- Sit in a comfortable position and take deep breaths.
- While doing this, analogize each of your thoughts as air bubbles that fly out of your body, soar to the ceiling, and explode in the air.
- Listening to a meditation guide can also help.
Step 3. Eat chocolate
Feeding your body with delicious foods is effective in diverting your anxiety. In addition, studies have shown that chocolate can reduce levels of cortisol (a stress hormone that triggers anxiety disorders). More specifically, the compounds in dark chocolate have been shown to improve your mood.
Step 4. Get enough rest
If you're used to drowning yourself in worry, this method may be very difficult for you to implement. When you sleep too late, you are like feeding your anxiety. Research shows that people who are not used to staying up late are less likely to be bothered by burdensome thoughts. Therefore, make it a habit to go to bed early every night.
Adults need 7-9 hours of sleep every night. Meanwhile, teenagers need 8-10 hours of sleep, and school-aged children need 9-11 hours of sleep every night
Step 5. Learn to be grateful
If you're constantly worrying about bad things that might happen to you or your family, it's a sign that you really love yourself and your family! In other words, your life is fun and very grateful!
- Whenever your worries come up, stop whatever you are doing and think of five things you are grateful for.
- Some things you should be grateful for: your family, your health, the good weather, the free time you have, or the delicious food you just ate.
