Swearing is something that is easy to become a habit, but hard to avoid. If you're serious about stopping swearing and swearing, you can definitely do it. Read the following article to find out how to avoid using harsh words.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Be Self-Aware and Plan
Step 1. Identify the reasons why you want to stop swearing
The use of harsh words can reflect your bad (personality). In many cultures, people who frequently swear or say harsh words are considered as uncivilized, uneducated, disrespectful, immature, etc. On the internet, you can be blocked from various social sites if you swear a lot. Also, if you say harsh words to other people, you can be seen as a rude bully with nonsense. Therefore, there are many reasons why you should control your words. Take some time to consider why you need to stop swearing, as well as the impact controlling speech can have on your relationships and your image in the eyes of others.
Step 2. Pay attention when you swear
Identify the triggers and bad habits. Get a notebook and pen, and spend a week writing down your swearing. When do you usually swear the most? Do you swear when you are with certain people or in certain places? Also pay attention to the triggers around you. Do you often swear when you are stuck in traffic? Or, when you talk to an angry customer on the phone? Or maybe when you feel depressed, upset or angry? Write down harsh words and situations that made you swear in one week. In this way, you will be aware of your behavior. This awareness is the first step that needs to be taken to change the habit.
Step 3. Get help (optional)
Tell good, trustworthy friends or family members that you want to stop swearing and need their help. Ask them to remind you if you start swearing.
If you follow this step, be aware that you may be subject to criticism. From the start, determine if you are prepared to deal with such a response. If not, skip this step. However, if you really need help, make sure you don't feel angry with them for criticizing or reprimanding you. After all, they reprimand you to help you break your bad habit
Step 4. Find other ways to express yourself
At the end of the observation week, spend an hour reading the information written in the notebook. After that, find something else to do besides swearing. Also look for other, healthier ways to express your feelings.
- Instead of saying "You are an **** management!", try saying "I'm very upset with the current management" or something similar. Notice how strong and well-received your thoughts and feelings are when you're not swearing.
- You can also replace harsh words with words that are more “neutral”, such as “anjay”, “severe”, “ouch”, “oalah”, “yasalam”, and so on.
Method 2 of 3: Making Small Steps to Start
Step 1. Start small
Start changing the way you express yourself, but in small things. Changing the little things is the best way to form new habits. Determine a place or a situation to improve. For example, you can choose to stop swearing while driving, or when you're with your nephew. Just pick one situation first and live your first week not swearing in that situation.
When you (or friends and relatives who help you) notice that you swear in the situation, try to apologize and repeat the previous sentence, without harsh words. As awkward as it may seem, practicing speaking without using harsh words is the only way to fix your bad habits
Step 2. Punish yourself
Try to prepare a “swear jar”. With this jar, every time you swear, you need to put ten thousand rupiah into it. Now, for the jar to be useful, you have to be completely reluctant to lose the money you've accumulated. After all, losing just ten thousand rupiah is usually less emotionally “painful” to make you break your bad habit, especially if you are giving the money raised to a friend or charity. Instead, give the money you collect for things you hate, such as buying products from singers you hate. For example, if you like singer A but hate singer B, use all the money to buy singer B's music CD. If you often fight with your brother, give all the money you collect for him. By now, you must be working hard to improve your language usage.
Step 3. Give yourself a gift
When you meet your goal for the week (eg not swearing in front of your nephew), give yourself a treat. You can enjoy an evening alone, watch a movie, buy a good book, enjoy a massage, and more.
Method 3 of 3: Keep Adding Challenges and Practice
Step 1. Expand your challenge
Once you've finished keeping your mouth shut for one situation (eg not swearing in front of your nephew), add a new situation that needs fixing for each week.
- For example, if you manage not to swear in front of your nephew one week, the next week try not to swear when you're at the playground.
- If you do not succeed in achieving your first goal, it means that your challenge is still too big. Make the challenge easier. For example, instead of refraining from swearing in front of your nephew, set smaller goals, such as not swearing before 10 a.m. or not swearing when ordering food through a drive-through service. Determine times and situations that you can control, then develop your challenges week by week.
Step 2. Practice patience
The key to your success lies in choosing a situation that is easy to handle and a timeframe for improving your habits. Although it takes time, you can slowly get rid of your swearing habit. In fact, it may take years for swearing to become your habit. Self-improvement is always hard to do, but it's worth trying.
