How to Be Comfortable with Yourself (with Pictures)

2024 Author: Jason Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 10:50

Feeling good about yourself means that you love yourself, both mentally and physically. You'll also have to work hard and make some important adjustments to learn to accept yourself and deal with the unhappiness in life. If you want to feel good about yourself, start by identifying the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that might be holding you back from achieving it. After that, you can develop a lifestyle that makes you feel valued, loved, and whole. If you want to know how to feel good about yourself, you can follow some of the easy steps below as a guide.

Step

Part 1 of 4: Cultivating Self-Love

Step 1. Value your personality

Don't compare yourself to others and respect your own personality. Comparing yourself to other people will not make you feel any better, because you are different from other people. There is no one else in this world like you, who has grown up with your experiences and talents.

If you try to compare yourself to others, you will lose confidence, because there will always be someone stronger, smarter, or prettier than you. Instead of acting like this, focus on being the person you want to be, not the neighbor, the cool-looking girl at school, or your sibling. Once you set your own version of success, you can definitely achieve it.
Sometimes, you may feel that other people around you are better than you. However, you may forget about all your amazing strengths. You may not realize all the things you have, and that there are other people who want to be like you.

Step 2. Develop self-confidence

Confidence is the key to feeling good about yourself and loving yourself, both now and in the future. You can try to make an effort to feel confident in yourself and what you can achieve, although that may take some time. You have to remind yourself that you are an amazing person and that you have the right to believe in yourself. If you think you are worthy, you really are.

To look more confident, turn on your body language. Stand taller, have better posture, and keep your eyes looking forward instead of down. Try to sit still or stand still in a friendly manner so that you make a more positive and approachable impression.
Find something you can really do well, or do things you love better. If you are already very good at something, focus on feeling how great you are for being able to do it. Try to focus on what you are good at and how capable you are at things. You will think of yourself better when you realize your abilities at the things you love.
When you are faced with an unfamiliar situation, focus on the good things that might happen instead of the risks.

Step 3. Appreciate your strengths

Everyone has something that makes them feel satisfied. Take a moment to sit down and make a list of the things you love about yourself. Force yourself to keep writing until you get a one-page list of your strengths. Dig deep into yourself to find out what makes you a great person. Think about your good qualities, such as your ability to love, your sense of humor and trustworthiness, or your work ethic. The longer and more honest the list, the better.

Some examples of the qualities you describe might include being compassionate, diligent, friendly, strong, intelligent, sharp-minded, calm, and cheerful. You can also add things that you like about your physique, as long as those things are really important to you. You can include all aspects of yourself in this list. You can add something to this list whenever you feel proud of something.
Keep this list near you. You can check it any time to keep you feeling good about yourself. You can even fold it up and store it in your wallet.
Ask a friend or coworker about your strengths, some of the answers you will receive may surprise you!

Step 4. Prepare for bad days

Sometimes, you have to accept and live bad days and understand that they will soon pass. People often think that they have to be happy all the time to feel good about themselves. If you're having a bad day, especially after you've had a few great days, don't despair; know that that day too will eventually pass.

If you're feeling really down, make sure you talk to someone who really cares and will listen to your concerns. If you feel very sad for at least half a year, consult a medical professional.
When you are in a bad mood, your body will react. Pay attention to which parts of your body are affected when you are angry or sad. Knowing your body's signals may help you identify what's bothering you and what will make you feel better.

Step 5. Work on developing a positive attitude

This may be difficult to do. It will take you some time to get used to being a positive person, but you should try to keep positive thoughts in life. Developing a positive attitude is a decision you make and do every day. If you have a more positive attitude, you will feel better about yourself, as well as about the future that lies ahead and what you can achieve.

You can try to be aware of negative thoughts and turn them into healthier ones. For every negative thought that crosses your mind, think of two or three positive things. For example, if you're thinking, "I'm so tired today," you could say, "But my hair is still great and my smile is still amazing." Be kind to yourself. When you have a bad feeling, talk to yourself as to a loved one or pet.
On a more serious level, for example, when you think something like, "I'm very awkward in social circles," you might say, "But I can usually make people laugh and they feel comfortable around me."
Practice your positive thinking every day, even though people may not notice the changes in you. You'll quickly notice the big difference it's making in your life, and practice will make it easier to do.
Try talking positively about yourself to your friends. Talk about something you've accomplished or something you're interested in. You'll see that your optimism is contagious, so you feel better about yourself just by saying positive things. If your friend doesn't like hearing you talk about the best things in your life, consider the importance of that person in your life: can he or she really make you happy and feel good about yourself?
Make sure that the cause is significant before you "decide" to grieve. For example, some people will be sad/upset when they encounter an unexpected traffic jam.

Step 6. Realize that there is much you can do

Even when you feel like no one needs you or that you're useless, you can actually help others. Talk to your loved ones and see how much they need and appreciate you. Let your family and friends know how you feel, and they will tell you the things that make you a great person. Talk to friends, they will not look down on you; they need you.

The more you realize that you are valuable to everyone who knows you, the sooner you will realize that there is so much you can do for other people. And if you feel valued, you'll soon feel better about yourself.
Even though you may be currently in a difficult position in life, you have the potential to develop some desires and become passionate about something. This way, you can offer to help and share your passion for something with others. All of these are good reasons for you to feel good about yourself. At such times, don't forget to keep speaking with a positive attitude towards yourself.

Step 7. Make a list of things you are grateful for

You may feel bad about yourself because you feel like you have nothing to be grateful for. Bad feelings about yourself come from your perception of yourself and how you feel about your surroundings. Start making a gratitude list and write down the things that make you grateful, from your health, the presence of siblings, to the current state of the weather. This will help you realize that you can be happy because there is so much joy, luck, and hope around you.

Make this list with the same attitude you made your list of strengths. Fill in all the blanks and reread as often as possible. If something else comes to mind at a later date, you can add it to the list.
If you find it difficult to find things to be grateful for, try changing them by practicing positive thinking. Think about what makes you angry and force yourself to find 2 good things out of every bad situation. For example, "I'm annoyed that the barking of the dog woke me and my baby at 5 am." To neutralize your negative thoughts, think about: 1. I used my time to get closer to my son this morning and calm him down. Every time I spend with him is truly special; 2. I am grateful that I can hear the sound of birds chirping every sunrise.”
If you're still struggling to find things to be grateful for, you can ask other people about things they are grateful for. There may be something in common between you and the other person.

Step 8. Don't get too hung up on appearances

Everyone is beautiful as they are. You may dream about what you should change about yourself, however, your self-worth must depend on your qualities and character; not on physical appearance. If you want to be more accepting of yourself as you are, your top priority should be on who you really are; and, if there is a connection, then you can consider the element of appearance. However, make sure that you keep exercising regularly as a lifestyle. This will help you feel stronger, both physically and emotionally.

Limit your personal preparation time in the morning. If you spend time trying to look perfect, you will lose focus on the more positive and constructive things in life. Determine how long it will take you to do your hair and makeup, and look in the mirror before you leave. Develop a routine that fits into the estimated time you have set. If you spend more time, you will be bound to look for imperfections that don't really exist.
You are actually much more valuable than what your appearance suggests. You need to be strong and confident in your actions and accomplishments, not just in your appearance. For example, you could be grateful that today you were commended for your work on a project that took weeks. After the day passes and you get home, you notice that your mascara smudges when you look in the mirror. Despite the fact that you have blemishes on your face, you should realize that you have accomplished something that day, so you should feel more confident in your abilities.
If someone else compliments you on your appearance, say thank you and be grateful for the compliment. However, ignore the negative comments. Know that compliments on your personality are more important.

Step 9. Don't pay too much attention to what other people think

Focus on what you think about yourself rather than how other people think about you. Focus on happy and positive thoughts about yourself, instead of thinking about what other people think of you. In the end, you are the only person who has to live with yourself, so your opinion of yourself is more important.

People who insult other people usually do this to make them feel better. This means that they may not be able to accept themselves either; they are the ones who really don't feel confident. So, try to ignore their comments and avoid replying with hurtful remarks. The best you can do about this is to live the way you want without looking back, although this may be easier said than done.
Instead of trying to put yourself down, ask yourself questions about why you want to please other people. Ask yourself if the person who hurt you deserves to be impressed. You will quickly realize that they are only obstacles to your happiness, not a path to it.
You have to know who you can trust and when you can trust them. For example, most people would say they trust their mother the most. However, in reality, there will be very few people who actually dare to involve their mother in life. If you want to pay attention to what other people say, choose only the people you trust the most.

Part 2 of 4: Coping With Insecurities

Step 1. Understand where the insecurity comes from

Insecurities are rooted in us from a young age. Some children who have been sharply criticized or ignored have a tendency to feel inferior. In addition, some people may develop feelings of insecurity when they fail to do something for the first time, or are in a new environment for the first time. Knowing what causes your insecurity and what makes it worse can help you deal with it better.

Step 2. Learn Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TPK)

There are various ways to change the way you view yourself so that you feel better. However, the process takes a long time. The brain can continue to develop and change after our bodies have reached their adult size – a phenomenon known as brain elasticity. Brain resilience allows you to learn or change your mindset, regardless of your age.

By changing the way you think, you can also change your behavior.
You can do the TPK yourself or by asking a doctor for help. If you find it difficult to do it yourself, you should immediately see a doctor who knows all about TPK so he can help you.

Step 3. Identify your mindset

The first thing to do in TPK is to recognize the mindset. Some people who have negative thoughts about themselves believe that they are not very valuable, and they also believe that there is little they can do to change the situation. To change your mindset, you must first recognize your feelings.

This may be difficult to do at first. In fact, your friends may just say “forget it” and encourage you to focus on your strengths. However, this is more than just forgetting something and making a decision to change

Step 4. Start writing a diary

You should start keeping a diary of everything you think about today, both positive and negative. Write down the situation related to what happened at the time, how you felt, and how you handled it. This can help you assess your current thought patterns, so you can start changing negative ones.

You have to be honest when writing in a diary. You need to know all of your different thoughts, so you can write them all down in a diary and get a clearer picture of yourself. The more honest you are in your writing, the more likely you are to change your behavior.
Be consistent. Write down everything that you think is important, happened at work, or even that you're worried will happen to your partner when you're not home.

Step 5. Accept your thoughts as valid

Once you get used to taking notes in a diary, you should go back to looking at what you've written down. This way, you will be more objective about your thoughts, so you can accept them and come to an agreement with yourself.

Try to remember how you felt when you wrote down those thoughts, and instead of feeling embarrassed or uncomfortable about the bad things you wrote down, accept them as they are. Everyone has bad thoughts at some point, and if you can accept this, you can start changing it.
By acknowledging the bad things that are on your mind, you can master them and begin to change them. In this way, you will identify the thought patterns that are causing your low self-esteem, so you can begin to change those thought patterns too.

Step 6. Change your thoughts

Once you've written down your thoughts and feelings for a few weeks and are starting to accept them as valid feelings, you should test those thoughts and start changing them. Look again at your writing and look for similarities in your patterns of thinking. Look for this equation through some of the thoughts you wrote down, or a really sharp thought. Take the negative thoughts that exist and try to turn them into something positive.

For example, you may feel bad for being slow to complete a task. Instead of dwelling on your shortcomings, think of times when you accomplished something extraordinary at work or successfully completed a particularly difficult project. Say this to yourself, “I can change this because I used to do something really well. I just need to focus and I'm going to do something amazing, like the previous jobs I've done."
Make sure that you analyze the things you are feeling and turn them into positive situations. Know that it's normal to feel bad, but you should know that there are other, more productive ways of looking at yourself.
This will help you feel better about yourself: forgive yourself for past mistakes. The past is impossible to change and you have to give yourself a chance to improve. There is a saying that goes, “Dress according to the job you want, not according to your current job.” Treat yourself the way you want to, not the way you are in the present. This way, it will be easier for you to change yourself for the better.

Step 7. Learn troubleshooting skills

When you look back at past activities, you may notice that you missed some situations because of low self-esteem. If you notice your behavior patterns, such as refusing to go into a social situation because of anxiety or negativity, you should start trying to overcome them. Do this by changing your mind. When you begin to change your thought process about something, you can force yourself to enter the situation without having to worry about negative consequences.

For example, you may often turn down invitations to go out with coworkers, because you think they'll think you're boring – besides you're afraid you'll look like an idiot. Instead of thinking that way, think about the positive things about yourself and the good things that might happen: you may find new friends who like and are happy to have you around them. You can also develop closer relationships with coworkers.
If you focus more on the good things that might come out of the situation than the bad things, you'll also be able to think positively about yourself.

Step 8. Practice

This way of thinking takes time to practice. Thinking from a new perspective of yourself takes practice, but don't be afraid to start thinking positively about yourself. This can be difficult at first, but if you continue to respond to your feelings and recognize your negative behavior, you can work to change it. After a while, you'll notice that you're getting used to thinking positive instead of negative.

If you have trouble with this process, ask your doctor for help. TPK can be made easier with the help of people who have been professionally trained, who understand the methods and may be able to see things about you (which you may not even know yourself).
In a TPK session, the doctor will act as a co-worker in trying to achieve your goals.

Part 3 of 4: Taking Action

Step 1. Do what you think is right

Sometimes, a person's self-confidence is low because he did something he thought was wrong or inappropriate. Following personal moral values and codes of conduct can help develop your self-confidence and self-esteem.

Step 2. Share your achievements with family and friends

When you achieve something that you are very proud of, know that it is in this moment that you truly seem worthy. Appreciate your hard work, congratulate yourself, and invite others to celebrate this together. This way, you'll feel better about yourself, because someone else will be cheering you on.

Call your grandparents, or email the aunt you care about most, and share the good news, so you can celebrate the news with your family and friends.
Know that this is a good thing for both you and them: talking to family members and friends means that you want to share your happiness with them. After all, you may have to share your accomplishments with others if you want to feel good about yourself.

Step 3. Accept compliments sincerely

When your friend says, “I liked your presentation,” try not to turn down the compliment by saying, “You're exaggerating. I was really nervous and forgot a few things.” Instead of responding this way, say "thank you" and let the compliment sink in. If you criticize or demean yourself every time someone tries to make you feel good, they may avoid praising you in the future. So the next time you hear something good about yourself, accept it gladly instead of rejecting it.

Look at the person giving the compliment and sincerely thank them.
If the compliment makes you feel uncomfortable, you don't have to accept it. However, if you really like it, accept it.

Step 4. Celebrate your ability to take care of yourself

For some people, taking the time to take care of their own hygiene and health can make them feel that they are truly worthy of attention. Taking care of the body is as important as taking care of the mind. There are a number of fairly "extreme" ways to keep clean that can calm you down:

For example, taking a long shower, or pampering your skin with a scented soap/lotion.
This is different from wasting a lot of money on popular make-up or clothes – it means you have to take the time and take care of your body.

Step 5. Wear comfortable clothes

You know which clothes make you feel more awkward and which pants make you uncomfortable moving. If you have clothes like this, it's time to donate them to charity. Wear your favorite color. If you feel comfortable, your self-confidence will emerge. If someone makes fun of your clothes, shrug your shoulders and say, "I love it!"

Remember, other people aren't really going to see or talk about you as often as you think.
Don't wear clothes that make you feel uncomfortable just because you think they're cool. Do what makes you feel good, and others will see that you feel good about yourself.
In certain situations, you will feel more relieved if you wear the right clothes for the event you are attending. For example, if you are going to a meeting, you should dress according to the employee code of conduct, even if the attire may make you feel uncomfortable.

Step 6. Create your own signature

Experiment with clothes and find out which clothes make you feel like you look your best. You can wear fancy clothes on some days, while on other days, you can choose clothes that make you feel more comfortable. This is normal. Visit a clothing store with friends and try on some new clothes in different colors and styles. Chances are, you'll find something that actually looks good.

There's nothing wrong with focusing on your appearance, especially when you're trying to express who you really are. For example, you can wear a certain color of clothing – this shows your taste in color.
Just ignore the clothes that you think are less than ideal. The outfit may be more suitable for someone else.
Changing your style can help you discover a side of yourself that you never knew existed.
You can also try a new hairstyle. If you have long hair, you can braid, curl, or bun your hair. Experiment to find ways you can express yourself through your appearance. Remember, there are many options available. All of these things will define you if you really like them.

Step 7. Befriending people can make you feel better

If you're out with friends and they start talking about something that makes you uncomfortable, change the subject. If you're always with a friend who's obsessed with your appearance, try changing the subject to something that's not about appearance. If this happens often, you should try to find other friends who have better principles in life.

Ask yourself if your friends compliment and help you more, or find fault with everything you do. If they see you negatively, you should immediately distance yourself from them. This may sound like a very bad thing to do, but you will feel better about yourself.
For example, you can change the subject if your friends start talking about weight or diet, and you don't want to talk about it. Show them that there are more interesting topics to talk about, such as the performance of the football team they support, and how old their golden retriever pup is this month.

Step 8. Learn something new

Read articles about what is happening in the world. You'll feel more knowledgeable about what's going on, in addition to helping you get out of your routine and get a distraction. Take a clay-making class or watch a documentary. Do something that inspires you to learn and appreciate the world. You will immediately feel strong because you have a desire for change and new knowledge.

If you learn something interesting, share it with others. It will make you feel that you have something to share with the world

Step 9. Exercise

Exercising will make you feel better physically and mentally. While losing weight and getting into shape are the results that people commonly desire, core exercise is very important. Exercise makes you feel more self-conscious and develops a healthy routine. In addition, the rush of endorphins (which can be produced during exercise) will help you feel happier. Exercise for at least 30 minutes every day and learn to love whatever you do. You will feel better just by making these easy changes to your daily life.

Find a friend to work out with to make the activity more fun and make you more energized. You'll even feel better if you have a friend to cheer you on when you feel like quitting.
If you're not satisfied with your current exercise routine or haven't found something you like, keep changing it and trying new types of exercise. Everyone has their own favorite type of sport; the question is, have you found the right one for yourself?
Some inexpensive forms of exercise are around the house or in the park, aerobics or light weight lifting, and burpees

Part 4 of 4: Maintaining a Good Feeling of Yourself

Step 1. Volunteer

Volunteering is a great way to feel good about yourself, as well as to give back to those around you. In addition, you also have the opportunity to show what you can offer to the world. Find the type of volunteer work that suits your talents, whether it's teaching people to read or just talking to them. Make it a habit to do at least a few times a month. Once you start volunteering, you will begin to see that there are many people who value you, and that you should not spend time looking down on yourself.

You can get involved in teaching adults or reading activities for children, cleaning up nearby parks, volunteering at the local library or bookstore, or volunteering in soup kitchens/homeless shelters.
Depending on the type of skill you have, there may be a more specific type of volunteer work for you to do. For example, a lawyer can sometimes do a job for free, or an architect can build a house for free.

Step 2. Keep writing the diary

Keep journaling even after you've finished doing the TPK (or if you're still trying to do it). This will help you feel better about yourself. You should write at least once or twice a week and make a chart of your progress. Make a note of the things you do, both those that make you feel better and those that make you worse. This method can help you to be happier. However, know that of course there will be challenges or certain days that make you feel uncomfortable. You have to be honest about these days. Make sure you always ask yourself what could make you feel better.

Also know that change takes time to achieve the results you want.
Take the time to reread your diary at least once a month. This can help you see how far you have progressed.

Step 3. Entertain yourself when you need it

When you feel sad, accept it as something natural (sadness is sometimes even better than feeling happy). However, know that you can control your emotions and decide not to feel sad if you don't want to. Experiment with what might make you happy or ask a friend for help. Most people have an activity that makes them feel better.

Examples include fishing, shopping, going for a hike, doing housework, meditating, playing bowling, meeting friends, exercising, and writing.
In the morning, open the windows and let the fresh air and sunshine in. At night, put on your nightwear and sit comfortably reading a book, watching a movie, or listening to a song. Take a warm bath if you feel stressed. Imagine the water washed away all your worries.
You can also create your own ritual that you can feel comfortable with. When you feel angry or stressed, take three long, slow, deep breaths. Turn on your favorite song. Find a way to lift your spirits, and repeat it whenever you feel restless.
Realize that being irritated can actually be a good thing, because it can help you find the problem. The sooner you can find it, the sooner you will feel better.

Step 4. Start making a list of the things you want

Find a notebook and write down the places you want to visit, the experiences you want to have, the people you want to meet, and the skills you want to learn. A to-do list/dream list is a great way to start to make life more fun, more exciting, and full of exciting experiences.

Make little checkboxes for each item on your list, so you can check it whenever something happens. Have fun plans for the future and make them a priority to implement. This can make you feel better about yourself, because you'll feel like you have a lot to do. Make sure the things on your dream list are achievable, no matter how strange they may seem. Try not to discourage yourself by writing down something you can't achieve

Step 5. Look for inspiration from your role models

Think about what it takes for you to live like your role model, be it your mother, Shakira, or your math teacher. Think about how generous they are in treating other people, how they react to disappointing things or unpleasant situations, and how they are grateful for every important moment in life and enjoy the purpose of life they are living. This is important, especially when you are feeling very hopeless. Close your eyes and imagine how your role model will deal with the situation you are in.

Inspiration from external sources can help you prepare steps to overcome difficult situations and overcome challenges

Step 6. Maintain a strong support network

If you want to feel better about yourself, you may need help. You have to depend on friends, relatives, parents, or someone important in your life. These people could be your co-workers, neighbors, or classmates. You need someone when you're in trouble – someone who will listen if you need help. You may also need to keep good-natured people in your social circle, so you can anticipate with excitement about what life has in store for you.

While achieving personal goals is important, you should also socialize. Make it a habit to make time to meet other people, at least a few times a week.
Your loved ones are important figures. You can always meet new people next time. Connecting with various friends and important people in your life will broaden your perspective and make you feel better about yourself.