3 Ways to Compliment Others

2024 Author: Jason Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2024-01-19 22:11

A compliment can give a pleasant feeling. Compliments carry the positive feeling that someone is paying attention to something about you that they think deserves praise. Praise is an important component of socializing and also an important part of starting a conversation. For some people, giving compliments can be uncomfortable because of feelings of indecision. If you can relate this to anxiety, start with Step 1 to learn how to give compliments appropriately.

Step

Method 1 of 3: Praise Right

Step 1. Say it sincerely

When you make an insincere compliment, people can almost always tell. If you're sincere about what you're saying, they'll be much easier to believe and feel good about what you're saying.

• Try to look someone in the eye when you compliment them. This helps you to show that you are sincerely stating what you are saying.

  

• Giving compliments in detail will also make them sound more sincere. For example, saying "That sweater looks good on you" won't sound as good as saying "Your eyes glow in that color."

Step 2. Say it respectfully

Make sure that what you say to someone won't offend them, even if you mean to compliment them. If your compliments are based on their race or physical appearance, then you've hit a sensitive spot. If your compliment comes with certain conditions (such as "You look beautiful "for a…"), then it's best to keep it to yourself.

For example, telling a woman that she looks beautiful in makeup (which implies that she isn't her normal beauty.) Another example is racist compliments, such as saying a man is "smart enough for black people."

Step 3. Say compliments at the right time

There are some inappropriate compliments given at any given time. Make sure that your compliment fits the context of what's going on around you before you give it.

• For example, complimenting a female coworker on how she looks after she gives a presentation may sound like an understatement for the hard work she has put in.

• If you're complimenting someone who does something really well, like preparing a meal or giving a good presentation, you should say it right then, in front of other people. Offering praise in front of others as a witness will prove your praise is deserved, and pay respect to the person you are praising.

  

Step 4. Don't make a compliment something about you

Don't turn a compliment to someone in a conversation about something about you. This will make you seem selfish, and like you're only complimenting him to get compliments back and to keep the conversation focused on yourself.

For example, don't say things like "You did something great last week. I definitely couldn't have done it. I was really bad at it."

Method 2 of 3: Finding Things to Compliment

Step 1. Let it come in time

The best way to make yourself sound sincere when giving a compliment is to say it when you have positive thoughts about it. Basically: say what you think! If you see something good, just say it, no need to plan ahead.

Step 2. Focus on what they are good at

When you're complimenting someone, it's best to focus on what they're good at (like their personality, their accomplishments, etc.) This will help them feel comfortable in the compliment, so they don't have to worry about losing benefit in the eyes of others.

For example: "I love the way you interact with children. You are very patient!" or "You did a great job with that poster! I can't stop looking at it!"

Step 3. Focus the praise on them

You should really compliment the person you're referring to, not the thing they're wearing. For example, "You look beautiful in that sweater!" would be better "I like that sweater looks good on you."

Step 4. Find what they value

If you're trying to find something you can compliment someone on, try paying attention to what you know they value. Recall your interactions with them and rethink what they talked about or pay more attention to this in the future.

For example, if you notice that your boyfriend looks sadly at another girl's clothes and says he wished he could wear something like that, let's say that you like the way he dresses and you don't even notice the other girl is around

Step 5. Look for things that are difficult to do

Another thing you can look for is something that is hard for someone to do. If they're trying to lose weight, commend their hard work and passion (but not the weight loss itself.) If they've tried hard to make a good report, give credit for the quality.

Method 3 of 3: Special Situations

Step 1. Give compliments to strangers

• Avoid giving compliments that are too intimate, such as complimenting their sexual characteristics.
• Compliment something they're proud of, like a nice coat, well-kept car, or handmade jewelry.

• Compliment them for what they did or something you saw, such as after they were very polite to the cashier. This will make you less scary to them.

  

• For example: "Thank you for treating this man so well. It's very difficult to be patient in such a situation. I'm very impressed with the way you handled it."

Step 2. Compliment your crush

• Don't give praise for expecting something. Just because you are nice to someone doesn't mean they owe you. They're not even obligated to be flattered by your compliment.

  

• Give praise by doing something. In a romantic relationship, doing something nice for someone is often more effective than complimenting them.

  

• Sometimes just telling them that you find them very attractive is enough. Especially if they are already dating you.

  

• For example: "I love it when you smile. The whole room can brighten up because of it."

Step 3. Give compliments to coworkers

• Say the right thing. Odd work compliments can cause a lot of trouble. Use the grandma test: if you're not going to say that to your grandma, don't tell your coworkers.

  

• Give credit for their work. It can also get rid of any strange feelings.
• Give praise in front of your boss. This will not only show that you're sincere in what you're saying, but also that they deserve more respect.
• For example: "Mr. Bank, did you know Sally was the one who took care of that last customer request? You will feel very proud. She has provided one of the best customer service I have ever seen."

Tips

Say it sincerely: people can tell the difference