There are times when you need to stay away from someone you live with, either because you are not close with your siblings or when you have an argument with your roommate or boarder. By being alone with each other, both of you can clear your mind and reflect on the actions taken for each other. When you want to ignore him, distance yourself physically and emotionally from him. Find ways to ignore his bad habits and manage your own emotions. When you're ready, talk to him so the two of you can make up and come to an agreement.
Step
Method 1 of 4: Reducing Interaction
Step 1. Respond politely, but briefly
If you want to limit your chat with him, don't just ignore politeness. Stay polite, but you don't need to have a long chat. Show respect in the interaction, but "send" the message that you don't want to have a long chat with him.
For example, if he asks a question, at least answer it with a “yes” or “no”, and don't extend or clarify your answer
Step 2. Give a neutral response
If you feel upset about what he did or said, you don't need to respond. If he upsets you or gets angry, ignore his behavior. Don't be reactive and let your anger control you, especially if he likes it when your emotions are triggered.
- Of course it sucks to live with someone who often provokes anger. For example, if your roommate wants to talk when you're not in the mood to talk, decline in a polite and neutral manner. You could say, for example, "I know you want to tell a drama at your workplace, but now isn't the time."
- Don't show an emotional reaction. Instead, take deep breaths and respond in a calm, steady tone of voice.
Step 3. Take care of your nonverbal behavior
If you want to ignore it, pay attention to the nonverbal language you reflect. For example, don't roll your eyes, mumble, or cast a hateful glare. Even if you don't communicate verbally, you can still convey your disapproval through your behavior.
Keep your facial expressions and body language neutral. Don't be tense or make any particular facial expression, no matter how much he tries to upset you
Step 4. Keep quiet when he says something spicy
Of course, it's hard to ignore someone when they're being mean or rude. If he often demeans or treats you badly, it's a good idea to ignore what he's saying so you don't get into a fight or get emotional. If he says something mean and you don't want to be triggered by what he's saying, don't say anything.
- You can ignore what he's saying or say something simple like "I'm not interested in talking about it, especially if you're just going to yell at me". After that, don't say anything.
- As much as possible don't let his negative behavior affect you. Try to imagine yourself in a big bubble protecting yourself from all his insults and criticisms.
Method 2 of 4: Setting Up a Shared Space
Step 1. Put on headphones if he makes noise
If you need to ignore the noise he's making, put on headphones and listen to some music. Try playing soft, relaxing music to relieve stress. If you want to feel more energized and positive, listen to upbeat and uplifting music.
If it's really noisy, try to find and buy headphones with noise-canceling headphones
Step 2. Build a physical separator
Think about steps you can take to physically ignore them. For example, you could use a different bathroom and avoid the rooms he occupies. If he's watching television in the living room, take your time in his room (and vice versa).
For example, if he controls the shelves at home, assign a specific shelf to each person and emphasize that he should only use his own
Step 3. Follow a different schedule from the schedule
If he often wakes up late, get up and go to work early. If he doesn't go anywhere on the weekends, spend some time outdoors. You can even make minor adjustments to the schedule. For example, while she's brushing her teeth in the bathroom, you can continue to take a nap or have breakfast. Study his schedule and avoid "getting up" with him as much as possible, especially if the two of you share the same room.
Sleep or wake up at different times. If you both have a similar schedule, make minor adjustments. For example, you could go for a morning jog to feel refreshed and leave the house before you have the chance to interact with them
Step 4. Spend more time outdoors
One of the best ways to put some distance between you and the person in question is to leave the house more often. Instead of going straight home after school or work, try meeting friends, taking a short walk in the park, shopping, or visiting the gym. By reducing the time you spend at home, you can clear your head and make sure you don't end up meeting or interacting with the person in question.
- Plan activities for the hours after school or work most of the workday, especially if you know he's already home during those hours. As an added bonus, this solution also helps you have a more enjoyable social life!
- If you're a student, find a club or activity to join before or after school. Join study groups, play sports games, or find extracurricular activities you enjoy.
Step 5. Avoid activities with him
Instead of doing activities that you do with him, find other activities. For example, if the two of you often watch television together, watch your favorite show at a friend's house. If the two of you often do laundry together, take your dirty clothes elsewhere (eg the laundry). Try to avoid or stay away from the activities you do with him.
- If he's depending on you for certain things (eg giving him a ride), let him know that you can't help him and that he needs to find another plan or solution.
- If you and your partner share the same group of friends, you may need to stay away from that group of friends for a period of time.
Method 3 of 4: Cheer Up Yourself
Step 1. Take a few deep breaths
If you're constantly upset about him and his bad habits, find ways to calm yourself down so you don't always feel angry when you're at home. Start by taking a few deep breaths to calm your mind and body. Inhale deeply, then exhale slowly.
Do some deep breathing exercises and notice how you feel. If you're still not feeling calm, keep doing the exercise a few times until your emotions start to get under control
Step 2. Periodically relieve stress
You may need to find steps to relieve stress, especially if you want to avoid someone you live with because the two of you don't get along (or fight a lot). Practice activities known to reduce stress levels, such as yoga and meditation. Setting aside time for fun is also a great solution to relieve stress and enjoy the good times.
Exercise is another activity to relieve stress and maintain body function. If you don't like going to the gym, try hiking, biking, or taking a dance class
Step 3. Spend time with other friends
Try not to get caught up in the person's drama and ignore it so you can have fun. Spend time with friends so you can leave home and connect with people who really care about you. Friends are there to help you, whether you need to complain or just get away from the situation at hand.
It's a good idea to talk to a trusted friend about the situation at home. Support from friends can be a “cure” for your heart, even when they can't help fix things
Step 4. Spend some alone time
Take this moment as an opportunity to take some time for yourself. Try new things yourself and take the time to get to know yourself better. Spending time alone can also be beneficial for you. These moments help you get to know yourself better and increase your productivity.
- Do individual activities such as journaling or creating art.
- If you don't have a room of your own, take time for yourself by taking a walk or simply spending time outdoors.
Step 5. Talk to a therapist
If your condition is only making your stress worse and you're having trouble controlling it, talk to a therapist. A therapist can help you manage your stress and manage your emotions better. In addition, the therapist can also guide you in learning specific skills to interact in a different (or more productive) way.
Find a therapist by contacting the nearest clinic or hospital, or insurance provider. You can also get recommendations from your doctor or friends
Method 4 of 4: Making Changes to Residence
Step 1. Browse the available options
You may feel stuck with the person you're living with for a number of reasons (e.g. he or she is still a member of the family, you're a minor, or you both have rented a place together). Think of alternative options even if these options are temporary. Even if you feel "stuck," there will be a few options that you find helpful. Brainstorm alternative options and consider whether those options are feasible.
- For example, if you live at home, think about whether you can stay one night a week at your cousin's house or spend the holidays at your aunt/uncle's.
- If you are renting a place with someone, you may be able to find another roommate or terminate the contract and pay a fine/fees of some sort.
Step 2. Stay somewhere else for a while
If you can hitch a ride at a friend's place for a while, do so. While not ideal, this solution at least gives you the space and time to get away from the person in question. By distancing yourself from the situation, you can clear your mind and think of ways to solve a problem or improve your living conditions.
- For example, if you live with one parent, ask if you are allowed to live with the other parent (or spend more time at their home). You can also ask permission to stay at a friend's house more often.
- This solution is temporary. Use these solutions to gain clarity and help you find a solution to the problem.
Step 3. Move if possible
If things get out of hand and you can't live with them anymore, consider moving. You may not be able to move right away, but you can plan the time. If you still care about him, think about whether staying with him would be a better (or worse) choice for your relationship in the long run. If your move can "rescue" the existing relationship, it may be a better option.
- You may not be able to move easily (or be allowed to do so) if you are under 18, do not have sufficient financial resources, and/or are still dependent on your family.
- You may need to find a temporary place to live while you look for a new place or raise money.
Tips
- If you live with a family member or friend who you really care about or care about, try therapy to improve your relationship. Therapy can help you get through a difficult situation if you both really care about each other.
- Set the end of the “waiver” period. If you plan or still want to live with him, the abandonment should not continue indefinitely. Set a time to talk to him and resolve any issues at hand.
- Ignoring him is a temporary solution when you're fighting with him (or not getting along). If you are in a serious conflict and cannot reach an amicable agreement after a certain amount of time has elapsed, you can talk to a mediator or find another place to live.
