Are you a shy person who wants to be able to speak frankly? Do you often feel neglected by the group and want your opinion to be heard? Has your activeness in class decreased because of your shy nature? Of course, it's not your fault that you were born a little shyer than most people. However, you can resolve this situation by taking the following steps. With a new mindset and some actions, you too can become a confident person and able to be assertive when interacting with other people.
Step
Part 1 of 2: Changing Your Mindset
Step 1. Get to know yourself
Maybe you always feel shy, nervous, and tend to be quiet when you are in a crowd. Try to find out why you're being so cautious or scared. By knowing what makes you feel embarrassed, you can deal with it more quickly. Also, know that shyness isn't a personality, it's just an obstacle that stands in your way.
Don't focus only on what needs to be improved, but also think about your strengths. You may have tended to be introverted all this time, but you also have a very good ability to observe other people and understand them
Step 2. Develop your strengths
After knowing the abilities that are your strengths, continue to develop them to be even better. This will increase feelings of worth and make you feel more confident.
For example, if you know that you have a good ability to observe and understand other people, pay attention and develop this ability. Start by empathizing with others. This will make it easier for you to start a conversation with people you don't know
Step 3. Don't expect perfection
Nobody is perfect. So you don't need to be frustrated and don't let this affect your inner sense of worth. Left unchecked, frustration can lead to insecurity and depression. Acknowledge and value your strengths instead of focusing solely on the aspects you need to improve.
Step 4. Build a good self-image
It's easy to think of yourself as shy and withdraw from social interactions. Don't make the connection between being shy and feeling rejected, weird, or unusual. On the contrary, accept the fact that you are unique. Don't push yourself to be accepted or have to be like other people, but try to find comfort in being yourself.
Step 5. Use social media
If you're shy, introduce yourself online via social media so you can get to know someone better. This isn't a substitute for social interaction, but social media will make you feel more comfortable interacting with people you want to know more about.
Try to find common interests by sharing information about yourself. You might be surprised to learn that there are people who share your interests or things they don't like
Step 6. Do what you love before engaging in social interactions
If you're worried about going to a party or meeting, do something you really enjoy right before the event. Read a fun book, listen to music, drink coffee, or just about anything you want to do. This will make you a more gregarious person and more willing to get to know other people.
Step 7. Think positive
Try to look at things on the positive side when you notice you're focusing on the negative. This will also reduce your self-criticism and make you more accepting of others.
For example, if you feel shy or nervous when you meet someone you don't know, try seeing this opportunity to meet you as a good sign
Part 2 of 2: Showing a More Confident Attitude
Step 1. Make a plan
Start small, for example by trying to make eye contact while talking. You can also try something you've never done before, such as changing your hair style. In this way, you will feel brave and will gradually become a more courageous person, although it may feel a bit strange and scary at first.
If you're having a hard time starting a conversation, think about what compliments you can give or what questions you can ask. That way, you can talk to other people more easily
Step 2. Join a class or group
Sign up to learn a new skill or join a group where people with similar interests gather. You can use this good opportunity to meet regularly with new people you can make friends with.
Be prepared to be awkward at first, but keep trying. Try talking to people in this group every week to make it easier for you to talk
Step 3. Don't be afraid to talk about yourself
If you can't find something to talk about, tell me what you're going through on a daily basis. Give yourself a chance to feel like you're a nice person and don't be afraid to tell others what's going on with you.
You can also liven up the conversation by showing your interest in the same things in other people's lives. The conversation will flow naturally if you keep practicing
Step 4. Practice relaxation techniques
Learn breathing techniques or exercises to relieve anxiety. Close your eyes and take deep breaths to calm your mind. It's a good idea to learn how to create a sense of comfort when you're around a lot of people.
For example, you can learn visualization techniques. Close your eyes and imagine feeling happy and confident using images. This way, you will feel more confident or at least relieve your fear
Step 5. Make time to hang out with other people
Don't keep waiting for the right moment to come. To turn shyness into self-confidence, you must first engage in activities outside the home so you can meet other people. Start socializing and practice speaking.
Accept it if you feel awkward. You have to practice to become a confident person. Don't give up easily if you've only tried being brave once. Interaction will get easier with repeated efforts
Step 6. Do something for someone else
Turn your attention to other people instead of just focusing on shame and anxiety. Make time to help others who need help, but you don't have to do anything great.
You can accompany a family member who is alone or invite a friend who needs help to have dinner together. This will cultivate a feeling of empowerment in you and make the other person feel better
Step 7. Do the valiant pose
Make eye contact, keep your head up, and pull your shoulders back slightly. Sitting or standing in a valiant pose for 2 minutes can reduce your anxiety by 25%.
The trick, sit in a chair and place your palms behind your head by intertwining your fingers. You can also do this pose while standing with your feet hip-width apart and your hips on your hips. These two poses are called the valiant pose
Step 8. Be yourself
Be who you really are and express yourself. You don't have to be the most spontaneous person to get along with. You can still express yourself even if you are calm and in control. Don't worry about what other people think. The feeling of worth you have is the most important thing to make you more confident.