At some point in your career path, you may find yourself resentful of a coworker's behavior because, yes, you are human too. First, you need to know how to live with the problem if you can afford it. If not, try talking to the person concerned. If it still doesn't work, discuss the problem with your boss.
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Part 1 of 3: Dealing with it in Everyday Situations
Step 1. Show maturity
Be polite to him, regardless of what he says. If you respond to what he says, you will only make the problem worse. In addition, you will also fight with him and that risks getting you into trouble with your boss.
Step 2. Ignore the problem at hand
One way to deal with something annoying in life is to ignore it if you can. Sometimes, of course, you can't just ignore it because it has a significant impact on your life. However, everyone has at least had you feel a little annoyed at some point, so try to find out what you can do to ignore the issue if you don't want to fight or argue with your coworkers.
For example, if he often talks too loudly on the phone, try wearing noise-cancelling headphones and playing soft instrumental music to cover his voice
Step 3. Take advantage of work to avoid problems
For example, if you want to stop chatting with him, use the deadline as an excuse to end the conversation. Also, if you need to ask him to turn off the song (or end the chat), say that you need to call someone.
Try to give advice politely. For example, you could say, “Ouch! I have an appointment at five o'clock. I guess I should go now” or “Wow! I like that song! Uh, wait a minute! Can you turn off the music? I have to call someone."
Step 4. Find common ground
If your main problem with coworkers is conflicting personalities, look for things you can agree on or share in common. One step that can be followed is to ask about his hobbies or pets that he has. By looking for common ground, you can reduce disagreements.
Step 5. Make sure you are not the source of the problem
Like other people, you too feel irritated about some things. However, sometimes you may express annoyance or emotion about it in an exaggerated manner. Observe the situation and see if something your co-worker is doing justifies your anger. You may find that what he's doing isn't a big deal, and you need to find a way to deal with it (and lessen the irritation you feel).
Part 2 of 3: Discussing Existing Problems with Coworkers
Step 1. Wait until you feel calmer
If you're feeling irrational anger over what a coworker did, this isn't the time to talk to him or her. Wait until you feel calmer and can think more clearly. Even after you've calmed down, you may feel like you don't need to talk to him.
Step 2. Don't talk to him in public
Don't discuss problems in front of dozens of co-workers, in the office canteen. However, if you feel that the conversation could get heated, try bringing in someone who can mediate the situation or at least supervise your chat with the coworker in question.
Step 3. Explain the problem to him
You have to be polite, while remaining firm. This means that you should never underestimate the problem at hand, without making your co-workers feel attacked.
For example, if your coworker plays music at a very loud volume, you might say, “Can I talk to you for a minute? Sorry to bother you, but your music is too loud and bothers me. We can find a solution to this problem together."
Step 4. Keep it professional
Do not bring up or bring up faults or shortcomings. Keep the conversation focused on the facts. Also, don't make fun of or insult him as this is unprofessional and can actually hurt your reputation.
Step 5. Take advantage of jokes
You can lower the tension by throwing a joke. Usually, it's best to throw a self-deprecating joke. This joke gives the impression that you are "just as bad" as him. When you bring up the bad, tension will build up between the two of you. However, by throwing a joke, you can reduce the tension.
For example, if the coworker left the kitchen in a mess, you might say, “I see the kitchen still looks dirty. Do you want to clean it? Actually, so am I. Sometimes, I feel lazy to clean at home to the point where I have to ask a neighbor in one RT to wash the dishes. Hehehe."
Step 6. End the chat positively
When you are talking about something negative, try to start and end the conversation in a positive way. This way, the coworker won't be defensive when you start the conversation, and he won't be upset after the conversation ends.
For example, if your coworker talks about politics too much, you might say something like, “I know you're passionate about your political choices, but coworkers who have different views feel uncomfortable. Can you discuss politics outside of working hours? I know you're passionate about your choice, and actually, there aren't many, you know, people who care about politics."
Step 7. Don't just demand
In every relationship, your giving should be as great as what you get from the other person. Therefore, if you ask him to stop being annoying, you should also be able to give him something. For example, if you ask him to lower the volume of the music he's playing, say that you'll also be wearing headphones as an additional solution.
Step 8. Don't retaliate
Revenge and upset him will only make the situation worse. For example, if you're not happy when he plays his music too loud, turning up the volume of your own music won't solve the problem. In addition, other co-workers will feel annoyed.
Step 9. Use an indirect approach
If you don't feel comfortable using the direct approach, there are a few other approaches you can try. One way is to discuss existing distractions as a common problem in the workplace during meetings.
For example, you might say, "I think the office has been very noisy lately. Can each person reduce the noise?"
Part 3 of 3: Discussing Existing Problems with Managers
Step 1. Think about whether you need to involve your boss or not
Ask yourself first: “Did his actions negatively affect my performance?” If not, don't involve the boss. If so, think about the specifics of the distraction you're experiencing, such as, "He's always so loud that I'm having a hard time meeting deadlines because he's distracted."
Step 2. Determine the best time
Discuss issues when your boss isn't on an important deadline or is pressed for a meeting. Sometimes, you can't discuss the problem with your boss because he or she is always busy. In this situation, try sending an email to ask for a good time. Thus, he can choose and set aside the right time.
Step 3. Focus on finding a solution
Managers often hear complaints throughout the day. If you come to him with a complaint, there is a possibility that the complaint will only go into the right ear and out into the left ear. Therefore, try to focus on finding solutions and not just complaining. Frame issues that need to be discussed positively.
For example, let's say you complain about a coworker who often talks too loudly outside the room so you can't concentrate. You could say, “Actually, I don't feel comfortable discussing this matter because I know you're busy. I'm in conflict with another coworker, but I don't want to complain. I want to find a solution. Basically, we clashed because he was often noisy in the office. I hope that maybe you can help find a solution or mediate with us. I and (name of the co-worker with the problem) have tried to solve the problem, but haven't found the right solution. Thank you in advance for listening to my problem."
Step 4. Propose the creation of a quiet area
If your company has a boisterous and noisy environment, your boss may not feel the need to tell his subordinates to calm down. However, ask if you can establish quiet areas for people like you (who need quiet at work). That way, there's a quiet place you can go to when you need to think.
