You may think that there is nothing you can do to feel a little happier. In reality, being happier is completely within your control, no matter what the situation. If you want to be happier, then you have to be willing to change your perspective to be more accepting of what life has to offer, while also trying to change things that aren't working. If you want to feel happier in no time, follow these steps.
Step
Part 1 of 3: Changing Your Mindset
Step 1. Think more positively
The easiest way to be happier is to try to be a more optimistic person. You may think that some people are more negative than others, but these are lazy thoughts that can keep you from being happier than you are today. Your personal situation may not be in your own control, but you can always control your perspective, and try to see the bright side of any situation instead of focusing on all the negative aspects you see in order to be a happier person.
- To think more positively, you must be ready to watch your own thoughts. Be aware of when negative thoughts land and counter them with positive thoughts – and logic. How many of your negative thoughts are just part of the “worst-case scenario” thinking or urge to hope for the worst in every situation?
- An easy way to think more positively is to associate with more positive people. Their optimistic energy will rub off on you.
Step 2. Create a gratitude list
Reminding yourself to be grateful for everything you have will instantly make you happier. Take a pen and paper to a quiet room and write down at least 10-15 things you are grateful for. It could be something big like friends and family or something small like a new garden planted near the house. Think of anything that makes you smile, and makes your life a little happier. Writing all of this down will help you see how much you can be grateful for and make you happy.
- Put the list in an accessible place, and add to it every week. Make it a ritual to read it again every time you write a new one, or read it again at the end of each year to see how much happiness you have in life.
- If you want variety, you can make a "jar of happiness." Write down something that makes you happy on a piece of paper and put it in a jar. Wait until the jar is full or wait until the end of the year and enjoy a moment reminding yourself of all the good memories that made you so happy.
Step 3. Appreciate the little things
If you want to be happier, then you must try to value the small pleasures in life as much as the big pleasures. Stop and smell the roses. Literally – stop and look at the flowers growing near your house and realize how amazing they are. Try a small cake at a local cafe and enjoy its rich and complex taste. Enjoy an extra minute of feeling happy after your best friend sends a cute text message. These little things may seem insignificant, but they make sense.
Make it a goal to jot down at least five little things that make you happy each day. Once you get started, it will feel natural, and you will find yourself smiling at things you never thought were special before
Step 4. Enjoy the moment
Another trick to being happier is to learn to embrace the present moment instead of feeling regret about the past or fearing the future. Learn to enjoy the conversation, instead of thinking about where you're going after this or worrying about what you said twenty minutes ago. Learn to appreciate what's in front of you, the good times you've had, and to throw away all thoughts of anything outside of your current experience. Obviously, this takes a lot of dedication, but you'll see your level of happiness increase once you get the hang of it.
Enjoying existence takes practice and you can learn to do it quickly if you commit to yoga or meditation
Step 5. Take time to reflect
Finding time to count experiences and sit down to consider what they have to offer can make you happier. You may not be very happy because you feel like you're doing everything out of necessity and don't have time to sit down and ask yourself, “What just happened?” Find a time each day – or at least every week – where you can sit still, stare at the scenery, and think about all the things that have happened to you. You will feel calm and will start to feel less overwhelmed by all the things that are in front of you, and yes, this will make you happier.
While musing is best done alone, if something keeps running through your mind, calling a friend to talk about it can also help you think about the event in a new light
Step 6. Stop comparing yourself to others
When you learn to look at your life in its own terms instead of wishing you had as much money, as many friends, or as amazing a body as those around you, you will be able to let go of bitterness and envy. Remind yourself that everyone has their own struggles and qualities, and that you can't have everything – and neither can anyone else. Focus on your own life rather than looking around and you will quickly feel happier for it.
You might think you know someone who has “it all,” but chances are, that person may find something in you that they're also envious of
Step 7. Feel more affection
Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama, once said, “If you want others to be happy, practice compassion; if you want to be happy, practice compassion. You may think that feeling affection for others has nothing to do with your own level of happiness, but actually, being able to feel affection for a friend or stranger in difficult situations can make you a more whole, self-aware, and grateful person.. If you're busy obsessing over your own struggles in life and never looking around to see how other people are feeling, you're most likely not going to be as happy as someone who is truly compassionate.
The next time you spend time with a friend, make extra effort to show affection. Understand the situation from your friend's perspective and ask additional questions about how your friend is feeling and show that you really care
Part 2 of 3: Changing Actions
Step 1. Spend more time with loved ones
Spending time with the people you love – and the people who make you happy – is guaranteed to make you feel happier. If you're feeling a little down on yourself, call a friend or family member instead of wallowing, and plan something fun to do later. You may feel as if a gloomy mood will pull you down, but on the other hand, being with your closest friends will improve your mood and make you feel happier.
- Spend time with happy people. Laughter – and happiness – is highly contagious, and you have to be around happy people if you want to be happy too. In fact, a study by Harvard and UC San Diego found that happiness is determined not only by a person's journey, but by his or her social network.
- Don't spend time with people who like to complain. People who are always negative, love to complain, and who see the worst in every situation, are sure to make you feel bad too. Avoid these people as much as possible, especially if you want to lift your spirits.
Step 2. Fix everything that is broken
Another way to feel happier is to look at your life well and long and change whatever you can to make yourself feel happier. While you can't make dramatic changes, such as changing your career suddenly, there are some small things you can do to make a big difference. If something doesn't work, then fixing it will definitely make you happier.
- Of course, you may not be able to find a more suitable career overnight. But what you can change is your attitude towards your job – remember that a career isn't everything, or the end of everything, and that you have other things to be happy about.
- Small things can make a big impact. If sitting in heavy traffic for an hour before work every morning keeps you feeling irritable all day, get up half an hour earlier to avoid traffic.
- Perhaps you are unhappy because you suspect that you are selfish, unfriendly, a bad listener or not a good friend. So, do what you can to fix this – when you feel happier with yourself, you will feel happier overall.
Step 3. Spend more time outdoors
Going outside, breathing in the fresh air and letting the sun fall on your face can definitely make you happier. If there's something you can do outdoors, change your plans to get some sunshine. If you're only going to read a book in a dark, stuffy room, go read in the park. If you're having lunch with a friend at a cafe, ask for a seat outside. Being outside – as long as you're not in the middle of a storm – is guaranteed to make you feel happier.
Try exercising outdoors instead of working out at the gym whenever you can. Running 5 km in the sun will make you happier – and more enjoyable – than running on a treadmill facing a wall
Step 4. Minimize stress
While it's impossible to stop stress all at once, if you work to minimize stress, you'll feel happier in no time. Start small – clean and organize your room so you don't stress out looking for something to wear every morning. Clear 25% of your social calendar so you have more time for yourself. Avoid people and situations that cause you great stress. You'd be surprised at how much impact it has on your happiness level.
- Try meditation. Meditation can help you relax your mind and body and can help you enjoy the moment instead of worrying about other things around you.
- Write a journal. This can help keep track of your life and will help keep you from getting too overwhelmed by it all.
- If you are so stressed that you can barely go about your daily life, consider talking to a therapist.
Step 5. Change the routine
If you want to feel happier, then all you need is a little change. If you're not happy, it's probably because you feel like you're stuck in a rut and that you're tired of doing the same old things day after day. Try eating something different for breakfast. Take yoga classes in the evening instead of the morning. Hang out with new friends instead of the same old people. Walk to work instead of driving the car. All the little things can add up and make you feel happier.
Just doing one new thing every day, even if you don't necessarily like it more than the old one, can make you feel happier
Step 6. Spend more time pursuing interests
Everyone would be happier if they spent more time doing what they really love. If you are a photography fanatic, spend more time shooting. If you enjoy writing poetry, get up half an hour early each morning to do your work. If you enjoy cooking, make time to cook at least twice a week. You may not think that pursuing an interest will be worth it when you have a lot of “practical” things to think about, but it will definitely have an impact on your level of happiness.
Check your schedule. See if there's a way you can become more efficient at finding more time pursuing your interests, or if there's a less enjoyable activity that you can easily waste to find more time for the things you love
Part 3 of 3: Developing Happier Habits
Step 1. Get enough sleep
Getting into the habit of sleeping at least 7 or 8 hours every night will definitely make you happier. You'd be surprised that a good night's sleep can improve your mood – and that an inadequate night's sleep can make you think that you hate everyone and that the world is a terrible place. Happier people make taking care of their mind and body a priority, and sometimes this is what you have to prioritize if you want to feel happier too.
Try going to bed at about the same time every night and getting up at about the same time every morning
Step 2. Exercise regularly
Regular exercise has been shown to make people feel happier and even 30 minutes of exercise a day can have a significant impact on how you feel. You might not want to go to the gym or run when you're feeling down, but that's what will lift your spirits. If exercise alone is too boring, join a yoga group, dance, barre class or join a sports team.
Choose physical activity over transportation whenever you can. Even a 15-minute walk to the grocery store instead of driving or taking four flights of stairs instead of taking the elevator can make you feel happier
Step 3. Smile more often
Research shows that smiling more often can actually make people feel happier. Even if you don't feel like you have a reason to smile, trying to smile more often than usual will trick your brain into feeling happier. Smiling at the people around you will make them smile back, and being around smiling people will also make you feel happier. So smiling is a win-win situation, even if you want to frown.
Pretend until you can. You may feel that your smile is fake, at first, but you'll be surprised how quickly you start to feel happier when you try to smile even when you don't want to
Step 4. Make time for happiness
Take a look at your days and see which ones really make you the happiest. While you can't start working an hour a day and hanging out with friends for five hours each day, you can make small adjustments to spend more time doing the things that really make you happy. If you find that yoga makes you happy, then subtract two hours of television time each week and another two hours for yoga; If you feel that hanging out with your friends makes you smile, then spend less time with coworkers and spend more time with your friends.
Maybe you haven't really thought about which hours of your day can actually make you the happiest. Make a list of everything you do each day and find out which direction the most happiness comes from
Step 5. Do nice things to other people
One study showed that people who were given good bonuses at work were happiest when they gave significant amounts of those bonuses to others. This doesn't mean you have to spend all your money on your best friend, but it does mean that you should make a more concerted effort to do fun things for other people, whether by helping a friend get over a breakup just by being there or volunteering at a homeless shelter. No action is 100% selfless, and you can help others while helping yourself to feel happier.
- You have to do at least a few small things for other people "just because" every week. This is guaranteed to make you feel better.
- Don't just do fun things for a friend because it's their birthday. Give your friend a nice gift just because you're thinking about him or her, and see how much of an effect this action has on both of you.
Step 6. Take some time for yourself
If you want to feel happier, then you should spend more time thinking about yourself. This doesn't mean you have to be completely self-absorbed, but it does mean that you should schedule time for yourself to be alone with just your own thoughts, ideas, and favorite activities. Your life may be busy, but there is always time to take a half or an hour here and there just to be alone, whether for a walk, journaling, or just contemplating the week.
- Spending time alone allows you to release stress, relieve stress, and feel happier.
- Don't let a friend's last minute plans get in the way of your alone time. Think of dating yourself like going on a date with your favorite celebrity.
Step 7. Let go of control
If you really want to feel happier, then you have to let go of the idea that you have control over everything that happens to you – from career successes and failures to the health of your beloved pet. The fact is, you have almost no control over everything that happens to you, including how long you will live. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you will realize that you have no control over what life gives you – but you can control how you react to it. The power to be happy or sad is in your hands.
Of course, it is a little scary to admit that much of life is controlled by the forces at hand. But the sooner you accept it, the sooner you will be able to see that happiness is in your hands
Tips
- Sport! This activity can improve circulation and release happy hormones.
- Eat healthy and proper food! These foods can make your body feel full, and therefore make you happier.
- When you're sad or angry, sometimes it's good to find a quiet place to be alone. Observing or paying attention to objects can help. Continue to entertain yourself to free your mind from anger or sadness.
- Be grateful for what you have.
- If no one is talking to you and you're angry, it's a good idea to punch a pillow or squeeze a soft toy. When you're sad then it's a good idea to cry over it and then you have nothing left to cry about. If there's another reason why you're not happy, you can think of a solution.
