Successful people have one aspect of their personality in common: a strong mind. Strong-minded people have a tough mentality and hold fast to their ideals, but are willing to continue to develop themselves and are able to adapt to new things. To have a strong mind, you need to train yourself diligently and patiently like working out in a gym. Form a tough mentality by ensuring the principles of life that you believe in, having the determination to live life according to the values of virtue, and becoming a tough person who is able to overcome difficulties.
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Method 1 of 3: Understanding Yourself
Step 1. Practice calming the mind
A strong mind is a clear mind. Learn to free yourself from worries and distractions so you can focus on what's important. When feelings rage, take a deep breath while refocusing your mind on what you want.
- Meditation is a very effective way to practice mind control. If you have never meditated, this practice may seem difficult at first because your mind is not used to experiencing stillness. Don't give up because meditation will get easier if you keep practicing. Set aside 5-10 minutes a day so you can reap the rewards.
- To be able to focus your mind, write down all the thoughts that keep popping up. Imagine that you are throwing garbage out of your brain. The ability to focus will increase if the mind is calm. If you have time, you may want to review the thoughts or ideas on the list.
Step 2. Determine what makes you happy
Ask yourself when you feel very happy or well and find out why. Then, determine why the experience was so valuable to you. Try to recreate the same experience as often as possible. Also, ask those closest to you to give their opinion about you. Ask how you behave when you're happy and why you're exhibiting that behavior. This information is very useful for getting to know yourself.
For example, if you've been a tutor and are passionate about the profession, look for opportunities to become a tutor to help others and share your knowledge
Step 3. Determine what keeps you motivated
Think about what drives you to achieve something or to keep fighting in your daily life. If you feel bored often, think about what you would do if a primary need, such as money, was no longer a problem.
Your motivation may be closely related to the virtues that you believe in. For example, if you put friendship first, you will be motivated to meet friends and make new friends
Step 4. Set some long term goals
To keep your mind strong in the face of distractions and obstacles, set some things you want to achieve as life goals. Make a flexible plan for the next 5 years.
- Set aside time to write down some goals you want to achieve in the next few years, such as graduating from college, having a job, or learning a foreign language.
- In order to set goals in life, interact with goal-oriented people or with mentors to discuss what you want to achieve on a regular basis.
Step 5. Define short-term, actionable goals
After determining the life goals you want to achieve, break them down into several short-term goals to make them easier to achieve. This method makes you not feel burdened and always focused on the goals you want to achieve.
- Set goals according to the SMART criteria which stands for specific (specific), measurable (measured), attainable (achievable), realistic (realistic), and time-bound (deadlined). For example, if your goal is "to have a job," break it down into several steps you can take, such as creating a bio, taking an internship, or continuing the required education.
- Set a realistic schedule. When setting up your schedule, don't forget to set aside time for rest, recreation, and dealing with the unexpected in everyday life.
Method 2 of 3: Become a Confident Person
Step 1. Be tactful
Test the ideas that underlie your beliefs. If the idea is based on emotion or assumptions, seek information to confirm it is correct and determine whether you need to reevaluate your thinking. Read newspapers and watch news shows to get the latest information on recent events and current issues.
- You will feel more confident if you can support your ideas with facts. Plus, you're better equipped to have meaningful conversations with other people.
- Be selective about who you want to socialize with. Choose knowledgeable and wise people who refute your views while remaining respectful.
- Consider carefully when reading information over the internet as some websites intentionally spread content that is untrue or harmful.
Step 2. Get rid of worries
Focus on the things you can control, instead of wasting your energy thinking about the things you can't control. If you're worried about a problem or something that's about to happen, think about what you need to do to prepare for or deal with stress. Then, focus your energy on taking real action.
If you worry a lot, take a moment to think about what triggers your worry. Allocate 10 minutes a day to worry about doing nothing. If you find yourself worrying outside of that time, remind yourself to think about other, more useful things. As a first step, do this activity at different times for a few days and then choose the most appropriate time
Step 3. Be personally responsible
Form a mindset that believes that your every action and decision is under your control. Instead of blaming someone else when something bad happens, think about the most helpful way of responding and determine steps to prevent it from happening again.
Likewise, when life is going well, reward yourself for your accomplishments for working hard, instead of taking it for granted by considering success as luck. Share this good news with others and decide how to celebrate it so you can stay motivated and feel more confident
Step 4. Form good habits
Build strong willpower by forming good habits every day, such as getting out of bed as soon as the alarm goes off, keeping the house clean, and exercising regularly. If you like to procrastinate, break the habit by becoming someone others can rely on and breaking down your goals into more achievable goals.
Start forming good habits one by one. Record how often you do this habit. Do it consistently for at least one month before forming another good habit
Step 5. Be a person who is willing to learn and change for the better
Having a strong mind doesn't mean never changing your mind in any way. Our understanding of things can change over time. So, do not want to be trapped by what has passed. Open yourself up to new opportunities and learn to respond to complex issues from multiple perspectives. When talking to other people, pay close attention to what they have to say even if you have a different opinion.
Broaden your horizons and gain new knowledge by reading, watching documentaries, listening to recorded seminars, and visiting museums
Step 6. Don't be easily influenced by other people
Strong-minded people don't doubt themselves when others disagree with them. Learn to believe in the principles you live by by journaling regularly and being assertive about saying "no." If you don't agree, express your disagreement confidently, instead of just saying it silently or accepting conflicting opinions.
Step 7. Find out other people's motives
Make sure you have a clear perception of the other person in order to be able to convey your opinions and decisions with confidence. Consider the opinions of people who are worthy of trust and respect. You may feel confused or deceived when you listen to self-serving or harmful opinions.
If there are people who are so demanding and trying to influence you that it annoys you, don't hang out with them. Most likely they never thought of your interests
Method 3 of 3: Relying on Strength to Solve Problems
Step 1. Face the problem with rational thinking
Do not exaggerate the problem by thinking negatively, blaming yourself, and jumping to conclusions because this will reduce mental strength. Instead, face the problem with realistic thinking.
- Rely on ratios to test whether or not your thinking is correct. Check whether you have valid evidence to support this idea. As much as possible, tackle the problem in a variety of ways that are more realistic and more useful.
- For example, if you gave a poor presentation to an audience, you might think, "I'm such an idiot. I don't want to speak in front of an audience anymore." Instead, calm your mind and say to yourself, "A lot of people have given bad presentations. So I'm not going to give up so easily!"
- Discuss your thoughts with a good friend or counselor for advice. They are able to be objective because they are not emotionally involved so they can provide new information that is worth considering.
Step 2. Don't compare yourself to others
No matter what other people do, strong-minded people are confident and tough people. If you want to do a comparison, compare the goals you have set with your achievements so far to determine how much progress has been achieved.
- Strong-minded people usually work in competitive fields, such as sales, sports, politics, education, but they are able to become winners by ignoring the pressures of competing.
- Use social media wisely and determine if this makes you compare yourself to others, feel inferior, or experience other negative impacts.
Step 3. Think of useful things
Instead of feeling sorry for yourself or giving up hope, think of different ways to overcome adversity. Ignore negative thoughts and think of solutions that you can do.
- Be careful because mental dialogue can be a source of negative thoughts that sneak in unnoticed. If you find yourself saying negative things to yourself, turn them into positive statements.
- For example, if you have a negative thought that says, "Why would I try again?" change it to, "I will try to improve my work today".
- The mind is very easily influenced by the people you interact with often. If people around you often say negative things, don't talk to them too often so you can continue to develop yourself.
Step 4. Accept things that trigger discomfort
You need strength and persistence to be able to leave your comfort zone because this is the only way to experience new things. Be flexible by going beyond your limits. Accept the fact that failure is inevitable and no one can predict what will happen. Discomfort, failure, and uncertainty are natural, important, and beneficial for self-development.
For example, improve your ability to accept discomfort by joining a public speaking group, such as Toastmasters or signing up for a challenging exercise class
Step 5. Be persistent
Never give up fighting for something you think is important, no matter how difficult it is or how many times you fail. Show determination even though the results are not yet visible. Try to take small steps every day to achieve the goals that have been set.
- For example, if you haven't found the job you want, do something else for a while while taking evening courses in your area of interest.
- You may stop if the goals you have set or the task at hand are useless, but first make sure what the real motive is. Stop if what you're doing right now doesn't align with your life goals or core values, just because it's hard.
