5 Ways to Defuse Emotions and Tantrums in Autistic Children

2024 Author: Jason Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 10:50

Most autistic children are not aggressive, but many show emotional outbursts and tantrums when faced with difficult situations or do not understand what they want. Autistic children don't respond this way on purpose to annoy others, but because they don't understand other ways to respond. With simple strategies, you can help calm your child's outbursts and tantrums, and even improve their self-control skills.

Step

Method 1 of 3: Coping With Emotional Explosion Symptoms

Step 1. Consider the causes of your child's emotional outburst

Emotional outbursts occur when an autistic person is unable to cope with the intense stress they have endured, and eventually explodes in an emotional expression that looks like a tantrum. Most children's emotional outbursts are caused by something that frustrates them. Autistic children don't explode because they want to trouble you, but because something is stressful. They try to say that they are not strong enough to deal with situations, stimulation, or changes in routine that occur. They release emotional outbursts out of frustration or as a last resort if other forms of communication fail.

Emotional outbursts take many forms. Emotional outbursts can take the form of screaming, crying, ear plugging, self-injurious behavior, or sometimes aggressive behavior

Step 2. Find ways to make your home comfortable for your autistic child

Since emotional outbursts are caused by intense stress, creating a comfortable environment can minimize the causes of stress in the child.

• Follow a routine that can provide a sense of security and balance for your child. Creating a schedule using pictures can help her visualize the routine.
• If there is a change in routine, the best way to prepare your child for this change is to explain it with pictures or folklore. Explain why the change will occur. This will help your child understand what to expect so that he or she will be calm when the changes occur.
• Let your child leave the stressful situation.

Step 3. Teach your child techniques to control stress

Some autistic children do not understand how to deal with their emotional turmoil so they need extra help. Praise your child whenever he succeeds in applying stress control techniques.

• Develop strategies for dealing with each source of stress (noise, crowded rooms, etc.).
• Teach your child calming techniques: deep breathing, counting, taking a break, etc.
• Make arrangements for your child to let you know if something is bothering him.

Step 4. Notice when the child is stressed, and accept the feeling as real

Treating your child's needs as natural and important will help them learn not to be afraid to express their feelings.

• "I see your frowning face. Is there something bothering you? I can ask brother and sister to play outside.”
• “You look angry today. Would you like to tell me what made you angry?”

Step 5. Model positive behavior for your child

Your child observes when you are stressed, and learns to imitate your behavior in dealing with that stress. Maintaining good manners, being calm when expressing feelings, and taking time to calm down when you need it will help your child learn to do the same.

• Consider explaining your options. “I'm feeling angry right now, so I'll take some time to calm down and take a deep breath. After that, I'll be back again."
• After you have implemented a certain behavior several times, your child will try to do the same.

Step 6. Create a quiet area for your child

It's important to understand that your child has difficulty processing and controlling a lot of visual, audio, olfactory, and tactile stimulation. Too much stimulation can make your child stressed, overwhelmed, and all this prone to emotional outbursts. In this situation, a quiet area can help your child calm down too.

• Teach children to signal if they want to enter a quiet area. They can point towards the area, show a picture on a card that represents the area, use body language, type on the screen, or say it verbally.
• Read this article (in English) for additional tips.

Step 7. Record any emotional outbursts that occur

Noting your child's emotional outbursts whenever they occur can also help you understand the reasons for the behavior. Try answering the following questions in your notes when your child is having an emotional outburst:

• What makes your child angry? (Consider that the child may have endured the stress for hours.)
• What signs of stress does the child show?
• If you notice the stress level is mounting on him, what do you do? Is that method effective?
• How can you prevent similar emotional outbursts in the future?

Step 8. Talk to your child about spanking and bad behavior

Remember that being autistic is not an excuse to spank or be rude. If the child is being rude to others, talk to him when he is calm. Explain that certain actions are unacceptable, and teach him what to do.

“It's not good for you to hit your sister. I understand you're angry, but hitting means hurting other people, and we shouldn't hurt other people even when we're angry. If you're angry, you can take a deep breath, take a break, or tell me about the problem."

Step 9. Call one of the child's other counselors to help you during a child's emotional outburst

Many autistic children are traumatized or even killed while being handled by the police. So, as a priority, if you can't get over your child's emotional outburst, ask another counselor to help you instead of calling the police right away.

Call the police only in cases of extreme physical danger. The police will respond harshly to your child, and this can lead to symptoms of post-traumatic stress leading to worse emotional outbursts

Method 2 of 3: Coping with Tantrum Symptoms

Step 1. Consider that your actions may have an impact on your child's tantrums

Your child has a tantrum when he wants something and doesn't get it. With tantrums, your child hopes to get what he wants. If you give him what he wants (eg, ice cream or delay bath/sleep), the child will understand that tantrums are a good way to get what he wants.

Step 2. Recognize tantrum behavior early on

It's easier to start recognizing tantrums when the person with autism is a child. For example, a six-year-old boy who slams on the floor is more manageable than a 16-year-old boy who does the same. In addition, the child is less likely to injure himself or others at an earlier age.

Step 3. Ignore the tantrums that are shown

The best way to deal with yelling, swearing, and grumbling is to ignore them. This will teach the child that the behavior is not effective for him to get attention. It's even more helpful to communicate your thoughts or feelings, then you can say something like, "I don't understand what's wrong with you frowning like that. But if you can calm down for a bit and explain what's bothering you, I'll be more than happy to listen to you."

Step 4. Take action if your child starts to be rude or does something dangerous

Always act if the child starts throwing things, taking someone else's property, or hitting. Ask the child to stop doing this and then explain why the behavior is not good.

Step 5. Encourage your child to behave better

Let your child know that he or she can choose to behave well in order to get the response she wants. Explaining this to your child will help him understand the best way to get what he wants (or at least be heard or accept some other form of compromise).

For example, you could say to your child, “If you want me to help, you can take a deep breath and tell me what's wrong. I'm here if you need me."

Method 3 of 3: Using the ABC Technique

Step 1. Be the one to “get to the top” of the problem

Keep a record (preferably in a special diary) whenever an emotional outburst usually occurs, for example before traveling, before taking a shower, before going to bed, etc. Write down A-B-C (antecedents, behaviors, consequences) of the problem. This will help you identify the child's behavior and find actions you can take to prevent and address the problem when it occurs.

• Antecedents (predecessor factors): What are the factors that lead to emotional outbursts (time, date, place, and event)? How do these factors influence the occurrence of the problem? Did you do something that hurt or upset the child?
• Behaviors (behavior): What specific behaviors does the child exhibit?
• Consequences (consequence): What are the consequences for the behavior the child exhibits? What did you do to deal with this behavior? What happened to the child?

Step 2.

Use the special A-B-C notes to identify trigger factors for your child.

Next, use the results of this identification to teach your child the “if – then” principle. For example, "if a child is angry because someone else broke his toy, then this is a good time to ask for help".

Discuss the contents of your ABC notes with the therapist. After you have gathered ABC information about the child, discuss this information with a therapist so that you get an accurate picture of your child's behavior in each situation.

Helping Children to Communicate

1. Help your child express their basic needs. If your child can communicate what is bothering him, this will reduce the chances of stress or bad behavior. Your child needs to know how to communicate the following:

   

   • "I am hungry."
   • "I am tired."
   • "I need some rest."
   • "That hurts."

2. Teach your child to identify and understand their emotions. Many autistic children have difficulty understanding their feelings, and it helps if they are taught to point to pictures or study the physical symptoms that accompany their feelings. Explain that telling people how they are feeling (such as “a busy shopping street scares me”) will allow people to help find a solution (for example, “you can wait outside with your sister until I finish shopping”).

   

   Explain that if the child says it, you will listen to it. This method will eliminate the tantrum

3. Stay calm and consistent. Children who are prone to emotional outbursts need parents who are calm and stable and consistent in dealing with everything. You can't stress the importance of self-control in your child until you are able to control yourself first.

   

4. Assume that your child actually wants to behave well. This is called the “positive assumption principle” and it can improve the ability of autistic people to socialize. People with autism will be more willing to open up if they are appreciated.

   

5. Find alternative means of communication. If an autistic child isn't ready to talk, there are other ways to get him to communicate with you. Try body language, typing, picture swapping, or any of the other techniques the therapist suggests.

   

   Trying Other Strategies

   1. Recognize that your actions have an impact on the child's emotional outburst. For example, if you are constantly doing something that makes your child angry (such as forcing him to be exposed to excessive sensory stimulation or pushing him into something they don't want), he will throw a tantrum. Children's emotional outbursts are more likely to occur if they believe that is the only way to get their parents to accept their feelings and desires.

      

   2. Treat your child with respect. Forcing himself, ignoring the fact that he feels uncomfortable about something, or physically restraining his body are destructive actions. Respect your child's personal autonomy.

      

      • Of course, you can't always take the word "no" for granted. If you don't want to do what your child wants, tell them why. For example, “It is important that you wear a seat belt in the car so that you are safe. In the event of an accident, the seat belt will protect your body.”
      • If something is bothering him, find out why, and try to find a way out. For example, “Is the seat uncomfortable? Do you need a small pillow?”

   3. Consider treatment methods. Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI) medications, antipsychotics, and mood balancers can help effectively deal with emotional problems in children who are irritable. However, like any other treatment, each has its side effects, so you should really think carefully about whether treatment is really the best option.

      

      There is ample research data showing that treatment with "Risperidone" is quite effective for the short-term treatment of aggressive behavior and self-harm in autistic children. Talk to your doctor or therapist about the benefits and risks of this medication

   4. Seek help from a therapist. A therapist can help your child improve communication skills. Be sure to find a therapist that suits your autistic child. Your regular doctor or support community for people with autism spectrum disorders will be able to help you suggest a good therapist.

      

   5. Arrange steps that are easier for your child. For example, if your child doesn't like getting dressed, break this "complicated" process into easy steps, one at a time. This will help you understand where your child is struggling with certain activities. This way, even without talking about it, your child will “communicate” to you about their point of objection or difficulty.

      

   6. Use specific stories designed to help autistic children learn to behave better in social situations (social stories), picture books, and play activities to teach good behavior. Libraries in various locations are full of children's books that teach a variety of abilities, and you can teach these skills through play activities too.

      

      For example, if one of your dolls is angry, you can move the doll to a place (“calm area”) and ask her to take a deep breath. Your child will learn that this is what people need to do when they feel angry

   7. Consider a proper reward system. Work with an expert to implement the right reward system so that your child receives rewards for being calm. Rewards can also take the form of a compliment (“You did great when you were in a busy shopping area!” or “It was great when you took a deep breath when you felt angry”), a gold star sticker on the calendar, or other form of appreciation. physical. Help your child to feel proud of his success in good behavior.

      

   8. Give your child your full love and attention. If your child has a strong bond with you, he will learn to come to you when he needs help and he will listen to you.

      

   Tips

   • Stay calm. As your patience wears off, it's important to remain calm and in control so that your child can stay calm too.
   • Keep in mind that even autistic people don't like emotional outbursts. After an emotional outburst, your child may feel ashamed and sorry for not being able to control himself.
   • Involve your child in finding strategies for dealing with the situation. This can help the child take part and have control over his behavior.
   • Sometimes, emotional outbursts are caused by sensory overstimulation, which is when a person with autism experiences a “dose” of overstimulation. The best way to deal with this is sensory integration therapy, which lowers the level of sensory sensitivity and allows autistic people to better deal with sensory stimulation.

   Warning

   Talk to a doctor or therapist before making any major changes to your child's lifestyle

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