It is natural and human to feel emotional because of being hurt and hurt. If your feelings are sensitive enough to hurt or have a hard time forgetting bad experiences, you're not alone. Building the strength to forget the past and face adversity is an indispensable skill in everyday life. Learn how to build emotional resilience so you can be prepared for adversity by reading this article.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Knowing the Meaning of Resilience and Understanding Your Feelings
Step 1. Know what toughness means
Resilience means the ability to get up again after experiencing hardships, disappointments, and life's heavy burdens. Having resilience does not mean building strength so that you never experience negative events, but being a tough person means being able to move on again after experiencing difficulties.
- One of the important aspects of resilience is the ability to adapt to new conditions.
- Some of the important factors needed to build resilience, namely having a supportive group that provides emotional support, self-confidence, belief in your abilities, and problem-solving skills.
Step 2. Recognize your feelings
Knowing the specifics of what is making you suffer makes you better prepared to deal with it.
Recognizing how you feel by journaling is a way of knowing how often you feel disappointed or angry and most importantly knowing why. Once you've found the pattern, decide what you want to do
Step 3. Accept the fact that emotions are normal in everyday life
Instead of denying or ignoring how you feel, accepting emotional distress is the most appropriate and easiest way to deal with the dynamics of life.
- You don't have to be superhuman. Avoiding emotional burdens will only exacerbate the problem because stress disorders will get worse without you realizing it. Suppressing suffering is self-defeating and makes you suffer even more.
- Take the time to accept how you feel by recognizing and feeling it so you can move on again. Often, the first step you need to take is to be alone and cry and let go of your anger.
Method 2 of 3: Changing Habits from a Mental Aspect
Step 1. Work on reducing stress
Many people experience stress, but the most important thing is knowing how to live comfortably with stress without feeling overwhelmed by stress.
If it doesn't conflict with your beliefs, do meditation to build awareness and take care of your health so that you are stronger in the face of adversity
Step 2. Use feedback as a learning opportunity
Pay attention to the things you can still improve on. People who respond positively to constructive feedback learn more, grow, and are more successful.
- Ask for constructive feedback from friends or coworkers you trust. Invite him to discuss an aspect of your daily life that feels comfortable to be a topic. Ask him to provide constructive criticism so that you get used to receiving and using feedback to improve yourself.
- For example, have a coworker go over your report and ask if there are things that need improvement. Or, cook your friend's favorite dish and then take her out for a meal and ask her opinion on how you cook and serve it.
Step 3. Take control of your life
Don't try to make excuses for your living conditions. Instead, try to fit in, build confidence, stop making excuses.
Develop problem solving skills. Write down the things that worry you, think of several ways to solve the problem, weigh the pros and cons of each method, apply the best method, and evaluate the results
Step 4. Think objectively
Take lessons from negative events or situations without getting carried away by the problem. Ignore useless information.
For example, if it's the first time you're late for work and you get negative comments from your boss, focus on a concrete aspect that you could improve on, such as showing up on time. Just ignore his unwise remarks
Step 5. Practice raising awareness
Building awareness means being aware of the present and preventing impulsive emotional responses from arising. Mindfulness meditation practice makes you better able to appreciate the present, overcome suffering, and heal old wounds.
Start practicing mindfulness by sitting quietly and holding a raisin. Observe the weight of the raisins in the palm of your hand. Hold the raisins with your fingertips while feeling the texture and wrinkles of the skin and then smell the raisins. Focusing on raisins allows you to be aware of the present. Do the same way when dealing with any situation in everyday life. In addition to using raisins, do this exercise by focusing on the things around you, paying attention to your breath, and observing physical sensations
Step 6. Remember that life was not created to make you difficult
Change your perspective so that you are better prepared to take advantage of opportunities and get rid of negative thinking habits that arise impulsively.
Changing your perspective and seeing things objectively allows you to think positively. For example, a friend who doesn't fulfill a coffee appointment isn't because he wants to hurt you, but maybe he was in an emergency and forgot to call you
Step 7. Give thanks
Research shows that the main cause of happiness is an attitude of gratitude or gratitude. Feelings of gratitude will increase resilience and improve immunity which makes you feel stronger in the face of adversity.
Keep a gratitude journal. Every night before bed, write down three things that make you feel grateful. Read this list again when you run into trouble
Step 8. Forgive yourself and others
See if grudges and sadness are useful in your life. If not, just forget about past suffering and live life in a more meaningful present.
- Write down why you are angry with yourself and then read this list as if you were a bystander and then let these feelings come and go. Be nice to yourself.
- Cultivate empathy for others. If your feelings are hurt by someone's words or actions, try to put yourself in this person's shoes. Empathizing with the person who hurt you may not be easy, but you will feel calmer and able to think clearly by seeing things from the same perspective and trying to understand what they are going through.
Step 9. Educate your child to be a strong person
Children also need to be taught how to deal with life's difficulties. Give them the opportunity to learn how to solve problems. Explain that mistakes are normal and there is always something they can learn from the experience.
Teach children empathy. Increased ability to empathize will reduce negative thoughts that appear impulsively and shape them into more resilient individuals
Method 3 of 3: Changing Habits from a Physical Aspect
Step 1. Find reasons to laugh more often
Laughter is one way to deal with stress, triggering endorphins that relax the mind and body, and boost immunity.
- Laughter is the best medicine. Start doing laughter therapy for yourself, for example by watching comedy movies or hanging out with friends who are humorous.
- Explore laughing yoga practice. These days, many people practice laughing yoga which is beneficial for the health of the mind, body and spirit.
Step 2. Write down your feelings
Research has shown that expressing feelings in writing is a way of recognizing emotions and dealing with negative feelings. In addition, you can release emotional baggage to reduce suffering.
Keep a personal journal, write a letter that never gets sent, or share your struggles with blogging
Step 3. Cultivate good relationships with other people
Build closeness with family members and friends who are ready to help you in difficult times. Admitting there is a problem sometimes requires more courage. Therefore, you will become more resilient by asking and accepting help from others.
Engage in social activities to keep in touch with others, for example by contacting old friends on social media or hanging out with friends for a chat
Step 4. Choose foods that make you feel more comfortable
Research has shown that certain foods can affect the brain and emotions. Consuming chocolate and omega 3 fatty acids is beneficial for health. Apply a healthy diet so that you are stronger to face life's challenges.
One of the recommended diet patterns is "DASH" (short for Dietary Approaches to Stopping Hypertension). This diet aims to control salt levels in the body and maintain normal blood pressure, especially to overcome hypertension (high blood pressure) which is called "the silent killer" because it can cause death without any symptoms. Keeping your blood pressure normal will naturally keep you healthy so you can deal with problems
Step 5. Get in the habit of exercising regularly to improve mood, increase energy, and maintain health
Being active is a way to reduce anxiety, stress, and annoyance.
