Overall self-confidence is affected by various aspects, including your physical appearance. Feeling lacking in your physical appearance can lead to stress, obsession with appearance, time spent constantly grooming, undergoing non-essential procedures to improve your appearance, and/or social isolation (such as staying at home, avoiding being photographed, etc). In extreme cases, a person can have chronic mental problems such as body dysmorphic disorder and eating disorder with or without social anxiety. In less extreme cases, low self-esteem in your life can worsen your mood and reduce the pleasure you feel while going about your daily activities. For these and other reasons, understanding and (if necessary) improving your confidence in your appearance can be critical to your overall mental health.
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Method 1 of 3: Improving Confidence in Appearance
Step 1. Find the source of your lack of confidence Finding out why you lack confidence can help you target those feelings
Start a self-confidence journal in which you jot down when you feel confident and when you feel less confident about how you look. After a week or two, take a look at your notes and look for patterns in how you feel.
- Are you more confident in any of the following situations: after spending more time dressing and getting ready, if you dress in a certain style, spend time in smaller groups, spend time away from certain individuals, or spend less time in the media? social or celebrity watching?
- Are there "bigger" issues, such as your employment status or personal issues that seem to fuel your lack of confidence? Some people turn this anxiety into self-perception, which may seem easier to deal with than "bigger" work or personal problems.
- If you don't find any patterns and aren't sure what's causing your lack of confidence, maybe you can try a number of different tips to find what works best for you.
Step 2. Understand your perception of your body
Dr. Vivian Diller has a number of cognitive behavioral techniques to improve self-confidence about appearance which she calls "beauty self-esteem." These techniques focus on evaluating the source of your self-confidence, questioning negative opinions about your appearance, and finding ways to think about your appearance in a more positive light.
Focus on sitting up straight with your chest out as you follow these steps for maximum confidence
Step 3. Write down your positive attributes
Write down 3 things about your appearance and 3 things about your personality that you like the most. Rank these 6 things in order of most importance and write 1 sentence about each. For example, "I help other people. I volunteer every week at a local foundation and always call my friends back when they need to talk."
Step 4. Analyze your positive attributes
Pay attention to how your physical features rank in comparison to your personality features. Most people place personality traits above physical features, and this emphasizes that our self-confidence is more influenced by how we feel about our personality and other people's opinions of us are likely to be influenced by our personality too.
Step 5. List your best features
Write down 3 physical features that you find most attractive to you using sentences to describe each of them. For example, "My long curly hair - especially after stepping out of the salon and my hair looks so thick and fluffy" or "My shoulders are broad, especially when my boyfriend puts his head on my shoulder for comfort."
This exercise shows that everyone has something to be proud of. This feature can be highlighted by the choice of clothes
Step 6. Look in the mirror
Look at yourself in the mirror and try to see what thoughts come to your mind. Whose words come to mind: yours or someone else's? Whose words remind you of: a bully, your parents or your friends?
- Ask the accuracy of the words in your head: Are your muscles really smaller than most other people's? Are your hips really that big? Are you really taller than everyone else? Do those things really matter?
- Think about how you would talk to a friend. How is this different from how you talk to yourself, and how can you get yourself to think positively about yourself instead of using your usual critical or negative language?
- Look for what you like about yourself in the mirror and from now on, every time you look in the mirror, look for these attributes of yourself instead of focusing on the negative attributes that you normally look for.
Step 7. Be skeptical of the media
Remember that what the media presents about your ideal body is designed to make you feel bad about yourself because that feeling is what drives you to buy new products or clothes. The body shown by the media is not the body that most people have and often the image is retouched using software such as Adobe Photoshop. People who are aware of this and are more media savvy usually have a more intelligent perception of their own body.
Step 8. Try to condition your mind
If you find yourself having negative thoughts about your appearance, stop those thoughts and try to condition your thoughts into something positive. For example, if you think your nose is too big, stop and remind yourself that you have a strong and unique profile. If you think you are overweight, think about your amazing curves and plan some lifestyle changes you can make.
Step 9. Keep a self-confidence journal
Every night before bed, write down 3 positive things about yourself. Then in the morning, read what you wrote and add two more things. You can repeat what has been said before. The more positive thoughts about yourself, the better your self-confidence.
Step 10. Get help
If negative perceptions of yourself persist, you may want to consider the option of seeing a therapist. Thoughts about your appearance can be connected to deeper issues that you're not aware of, and counseling can help you have a healthier overall self-confidence.
Method 2 of 3: Changing Your Style
Step 1. Wear clothes that make you comfortable
Research shows that the clothes we wear have an impact on our self-confidence. For example, wearing a superhero costume can increase self-confidence and make people feel stronger; the women did better on the math test in a sweater than in a swimsuit; and a white coat adds to one's "mental agility".
- Focus on wearing clothes that make you feel comfortable, such as a nice, soft sweater, your favorite pair of jeans, and a suit and tie (or something else that looks professional).
- Check your wardrobe and make sure the clothes you have match your style. If not, it looks like you should go shopping! If you don't like shopping in public or don't know what's trending, you can try a service that picks clothes for you and has them delivered to your home or you can look for an online store that offers a free exchange service.
- Wear the color you like. This way your mood can be better. If you can't decide what color to like, a good color to choose is blue because people generally respond to this color positively.
Step 2. Wear clothes that accentuate the physical features you like
Look for clothes that look good on you in the mirror because they match your body type or wear accessories that highlight your good features. There is no perfect body type, but there are clothes that do and don't suit different body types. Clothes that fit you because they match your body type are more likely to look good on you.
- If you are very thin, don't wear dark colors, such as black, which are slimming. Try wearing lighter colors. Slim women should try to create curves in their bodies by wearing a belt over a flowing dress. Thin men should avoid clothes that are bulky or baggy to make the body look bigger; wearing clothes with the right size will look better.
- If you have broad shoulders and small hips, avoid patterned scarves (which can draw attention to your shoulders), shirts that accentuate your shoulders, and shoes that look small for your body type. It's a good idea to wear pants that make your hips bigger and shoes with wider heels or boots with buckles so that people's attention is drawn to your feet.
- If your body is shaped like a pear, wear a bright color or patterned top, solid dark bottoms and avoid horizontal lines, especially for bottoms.
- If you have a round body type, don't wear too much material in your midsection. Also avoid belts, short skirts that are less than knee-length. Try wearing something with details above your bust line and below your hips.
- If you have a curvy body, try wearing clothes that are slim at the waist but flowy at the top and bottom. This will accentuate your curves and distract from the legs a bit.
Step 3. Buy clothes of the right size or make them at a tailor
Wearing clothes that match your height and weight will make you feel better about how you look, even if the clothes don't fit your ideal size.
- Order clothes that are made especially for you and fit well. If you're a very tall and thin man, for example, maybe you should order a Medium Tall size online instead of buying clothes in the store that are too wide and loose on your body just because you're looking for clothes that fit the length.
- Ask the tailor to make the shirt according to your length and width. Tailors also know tricks like adding darts (sections in the material that fold to create a charming shape) on clothes to accentuate positive features like curves.
Step 4. Put on the right lipstick
Wearing lipstick well not only means choosing the right color but also maintaining the beauty of the lips as part of the overall appearance by removing dead skin cells (eg with a mixture of salt and almond oil) and applying lip balm twice a week. For lipstick, the following makeup artist suggestions:
- Avoid shiny lipsticks because they tend to look cheap
- Choose a bright color according to your lip color (eg pale lips = cherry color, natural lips = cranberry color, and dark lips = burgundy).
- Choose a nude color that matches your skin tone (choose something slightly lighter or darker than your skin tone).
- Avoid lipstick with blue or black as it will make you older, tougher and yes, scarier (remember vampires?).
- There's no need to use a liner, but if you do, choose a color that matches your lips, not lipstick.
- Apply the lipstick carefully then blur the edges of the lips for a softer effect.
- Start applying in the middle then drag the color to the corners of the lips. Be careful not to apply it directly to the corners of your mouth.
- Apply a strong lipstick color to the lower lip then press both parts of the lips against each other for a lighter application
- Apply the lipstick once to your lips, then press a tissue against your lips and reapply the lipstick for a lasting effect.
Step 5. Apply makeup according to the shape of the face
While makeup isn't for everyone, those who use makeup can improve their self-image by becoming more versed in how to use makeup to improve their confidence in their appearance. Just like clothes, the thing to remember when applying makeup is to adapt it to your shape (in this case, the shape of your face) and direct other people's eyes to the features you want to highlight. To find out what your face type looks like, pull your hair back and look at your hairline and chin:
- A heart-shaped face (a broad forehead and a pointed chin) should distract people from the chin and cheekbones by using subtle colors on the face and lips.
- Round faces (the forehead and lower part of the face are the same width) should add definition by using makeup on the cheeks and eyes (eg using a smoky eye shadow).
- A square face (deep jaw and hairline) should use colors that are soft on the skin of the face, lips, and eyes to soften facial features.
- Oval faces (forehead and lower face are the same width with longer sides) should apply blush horizontally and define the eyes and lips to reduce the length of their face.
Step 6. Find a good hairstyle
A good hairstyle from a reliable salon or barber shop can make you feel more confident with your appearance and give you a hairstyle that is more in line with trends and styles. Just like makeup, the key to a great hairstyle is to adapt it to your face shape:
- Heart-shaped faces should try to have bangs and side-parts with chin-length hair that can help the face look rounder.
- Round faces should part hair in the middle or not so far from the center and choose hair with layers that frame the face and minimize the round shape of the face and create the illusion of a more sculpted face.
- A square face should choose a hairstyle with layers that frame the face and part it at the edges so that it distracts from the cheekbones.
- Oval faces are lucky because most hairstyles suit her because hairstyle techniques for other face shapes are meant to make the face look more oval.
Step 7. Keep up appearances
If you look like a person who takes care of your appearance, your self-confidence will increase and this can be obtained with the following tips:
- Keep your nails neat (both girls and boys can benefit from these tips). Make sure your nails are clean.
- Brush your teeth several times a day, especially after eating foods that can make your teeth dirty.
- Bring wet wipes or washcloths to remove makeup, sunscreen, and sweat. Or to freshen up after a tiring few hours. Also, make sure to do a thorough facial every 2 or 3 days to keep your skin clean.
- Use an anti-aging moisturizer, sunscreen and concealer (to even out the skin tone).
- Use your fingers (rather than a brush) to apply makeup so you can better understand how much makeup you should apply so that it looks more natural.
- Use press-on nails for a quick, sleek look. Even for people who experience life in the 80s, this option is acceptable!
- Wear deodorant or antiperspirant regularly.
- Use natural oils (such as avocado, coconut, or almond) to keep your body and hair moisturized.
Method 3 of 3: Improving Your Quality of Life
Step 1. Choose your friends wisely
Pay attention to your friends and how you feel when you are with them. Surround yourself with people who don't criticize or judge you because it can negatively affect your self-perception of your body.
Friends can help you achieve your health and wellness goals so that you become more confident about your appearance. Find a partner to go to the gym or a climbing buddy
Step 2. Smile and laugh as often as possible
While it's easy to do, smiling, even if you have to, can reduce stress levels and make you feel better about yourself. Plus, people will see you as approachable and trusting.
Step 3. Accept compliments
If you get a compliment, don't turn it down, just accept it! If you're unsure of how you look, it may seem odd to receive a compliment so you respond by turning it down. For example, if someone compliments your shirt, you might tell them it's an old shirt you're wearing because your other clothes are dirty. This is a reflection of your anxiety about your appearance and can make you and those who compliment you feel uncomfortable. Instead, try to say thank you and just enjoy the compliment you receive.
Step 4. Exercise regularly
While exercise doesn't necessarily change your physical appearance, it can change your perception of yourself, which can lead to increased self-confidence. A survey conducted in the United States on physical activity and the body showed that people who are dissatisfied with their body shape tend to be physically inactive, regardless of their weight. The findings suggest that being physically active may be linked to better body perception.
The amount of exercise you do should be sufficient so that you feel successful and should be done regularly, but it doesn't have to be a particular type of exercise over a certain period of time
Step 5. Follow a healthy diet
Certain foods, such as foods high in carbohydrates and sugar, can make you feel less energized and negatively affect your mood. Foods that can improve your mood are foods that are low in fat and release energy slowly. These foods provide energy in the long term and do not pose the risk of weight gain, flatulence, and so on; These foods can also make your hair and nails healthy and so can improve your overall appearance.
- Avoid sugary, fried, or overly processed foods.
- Try to eat more nuts and seeds and fresh fruits and vegetables, especially produce that has a bright color.
Tips
- Remember that what other people think of you is not important. What matters is you, and only you so think about yourself.
- Saying positive things out loud can make you more confident.
- If other people say mean things to you, remember that they are only showing their negative side and the comments are actually reflecting more on them than you.
- Be honest with yourself and look for what makes you feel more comfortable and confident.
