Trust is absolutely necessary as the foundation for building a happy and satisfying relationship for both parties. Couples who desire the best in their relationship must learn to create this kind of trust. However, most couples only think about beliefs related to sexual matters. While this is important, there are other things to consider.
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Part 1 of 3: Committing to Important Values in Mutually Agreed Relationships
Step 1. Show loyalty
If one partner violates loyalty, in a short time the relationship that has been established can no longer run well. There are people who can recover after an affair, but usually need expert help to do so. Make a commitment to be loyal to each other and stick to it. If you are unhappy in a relationship, seek counseling, not another lover.
- If you are loyal to someone, it means you are loyal in everything, not just physically, but emotionally as well. Some people think it's okay to build an intimate bond even if they've just spent time with someone else. Actually this is a wrong assumption because in the end it will cause problems in the relationship.
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Make sure you set boundaries clearly. Each culture has its own limits of appropriateness, and often relates to a person's age. But in the end it all comes down to being able to understand the respect, clarity, and comfort that is expected of a romantic relationship.
- For example, going on a date once can't be considered a serious relationship. If you ask someone out, make sure they understand that. Dating can be awkward if your date has doubts about whether he or she is having dinner as a casual friend or as a date.
- Be clear about your current relationship, serious or casual. Some people feel more comfortable with “unstated relationships” or “friends but intimate” relationships. Others prefer a serious and deeply emotional relationship with someone who is committed to the relationship.
- There are a variety of behaviors that can be indicators of a “committed relationship”, ranging from traditional marriages, “living together” to more radical and polyamory “open marriages”. A person expecting a traditional wedding may be disappointed if the couple wants a different form of relationship.
Step 2. Make room for your partner and maintain a good attitude
Trust can thrive in a safe and harm-free atmosphere. If partners hurt each other, either verbally or physically, and then create resistance in each other, this creates a great fear that can undermine trust. In addition, trying to control all the movements of a partner also reflects distrust. Therefore, make sure you do not show excessive attachment to your partner. This attitude will actually make the couple stay away.
If your partner wants to spend time with their friends, try to agree. You always have the opportunity to talk about acceptable or unacceptable behavior. For example, if your partner wants to go clubbing with friends and you're not comfortable with the idea, take time to discuss the issue either then or in the future so it doesn't drag on
Step 3. Love your partner sincerely, selflessly
Each partner must feel confident that he is loved because of the qualities that are in him and not for other reasons, such as family, money, appearance or even because of the fear of being alone. Make sure the relationship you have with your partner is based on the right reasons.
Step 4. Make the relationship a top priority
Over time, couples often start to disrespect and ignore each other. Try not to devote all your energy to taking care of other people or doing various activities. Make sure your priorities are clear. If you think of relationships as important, make sure you put them at the top of your priority list.
Step 5. Live the relationship to the end
It is undeniable that misunderstanding, conflict and anger will color a relationship. However, try to allow arguments or anger to be expressed without creating fear of abandonment. You can do this by never using threats to end the relationship.
Part 2 of 3: Building Trust on Your Side
Step 1. Maintain your routine
Many people believe that doing something spontaneous all the time will make the relationship more exciting. In other words, couples are always planning something new to surprise them. It's nice to have surprises from time to time, but stability and uniformity are much more important in a relationship. Uniformity may sound boring, but your partner must be able to predict your behavior for the relationship to last long term. Certainty can build trust.
Step 2. Show that you are reliable
If you trust someone, it means you can count on them. You trust your partner to do things all the time. This trust builds a sense of security in the relationship. Make sure your partner can count on you.
If you say you'll be home at five o'clock, make sure you're home by that time or at least let your partner know if something goes wrong. The most important factor here is consistency. If out of five occasions you've only called once to let your partner know you're going to be late or come home at will and at erratic hours, this could reflect that you are more concerned with your own needs than your partner's. Happy and successful relationships exist when each party strives to fulfill their obligations
Step 3. Be true to your words
Your partner can read your face better than anyone else. If you lie or try to hide your true feelings by not saying what's on your mind, your partner will be able to figure it out. In fact, he may even think you're having an affair. If someone feels they can trust every word you say without the slightest hesitation, you're building an unbreakable bond.
Step 4. Speak the truth
Don't hide anything, nothing should be covered up. Know that sooner or later things will come to light. If when the truth comes out your partner realizes that you're not being completely honest with him, this can come at a heavy price in the loss of trust and the breakdown of the relationship.
Step 5. Tell your partner how you feel
Too many people never tell their partner what they need. Don't let your partner wonder, or wonder what he should do for you. If only one partner's needs are cared for by the other, it's more likely that either party will feel shackled or neglected. Both options above are equally unprofitable.
Step 6. Say no once in a while
It's okay to listen to your partner's needs and try to fulfill them, but sometimes it's also important to say no. You can't do everything all the time, and you can even earn respect if you refuse to do something every now and then. Standing up, and asserting your own will can actually increase trust between the two of you.
Part 3 of 3: Cultivating Trust in Your Partner
Step 1. Believe in your partner's abilities
In other words, if you think your partner is incompetent at some of the things they do, your trust will not be strong. If that's the case, you need to be open and talk about it in an honest and loving way. That way, both of you can work things out and maintain trust in each other.
Step 2. Trust your partner
How can your partner trust you if you don't believe in yourself? It takes two people to trust each other, and if the other doesn't participate in building trust, it's like a fish without water.
Here you get a chance to practice vulnerability. Trusting your partner often leads to feelings that are inside you. In other words, if you are constantly feeling insecure about everything, this will negatively affect your relationship. There's no reason not to trust your partner until he or she does something that suggests otherwise
Step 3. Believe in the good things in your partner
One indicator of a trust problem is the tendency to think the worst in every possible situation. Don't immediately accuse your partner of cheating just because he doesn't answer your phone calls. If you trust your partner, you won't immediately accuse them. Everyone deserves a chance to explain themselves before you jump to conclusions. Only in this way can you see the situation objectively.
Step 4. Don't touch the partner's phone
Did any of you set a password for the phone? If so, this could be a sign that you both have trust issues. Privacy is important, but that doesn't mean your phone should be protected like a bank deposit. If there is genuine trust between the two of you, even if your partner has access to your phone, he or she will still respect your privacy. However, if you consider the calls your partner is receiving via their cell phone as a threat to your relationship, there is no doubt that there are trust issues to deal with.
Step 5. Let your partner have the freedom to control his life
Often times, when there is a trust issue, you want to monitor everything your partner is doing and with whom. You can easily be territorial and feel threatened by everyone. However, trust involves trust and gives freedom to the partner. When you trust others, you also believe in yourself. That way you will have a healthy relationship in the long run.
