Talking to strangers may sound scary, but that's not always the case! Chatting with someone you've never met before can be both interesting and informative when you use the right techniques. Start the conversation by introducing yourself. After that, ask questions and listen to what the other person has to say to learn more about them. Lastly, follow some key strategies to keep the conversation going and end it on a positive note.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Introducing Yourself
Step 1. Read her body language
Before approaching a stranger and starting a conversation with him, try to get a broad picture first. Make sure this is the right time to approach him by paying attention to nonverbal cues. Look at the way he stands and watch the expression on his face. Does he seem open to conversation?
- For example, if he looks a little hunched over with his arms crossed over his chest and a frown on his face, you may have to keep walking and find someone else. However, if he is in a relaxed position and seems cheerful, he may be interested in chatting with you.
- Even after the conversation has started, you should still check his body language to see if you need to change the topic or end the interaction.
Step 2. Use a friendly approach
If you want to say hello, use open and positive body language. Turn your face to him. Give a small smile, lift your chin, and pull your shoulders back. You should appear calm, confident, and friendly.
Step 3. Introduce yourself
After approaching him, give an introduction. In a cheerful tone of voice, say "Hi!" and tell me your name. After that, observe the situation between you and the other person (this technique is commonly known as “triangulation”) to keep the conversation going.
- You can say, “Hello! I'm Dani. You must be waiting for Dora's mother. Have you waited long?”
- Another interesting way to introduce yourself is to offer a sincere compliment, such as "I like your hairstyle."
Step 4. Extend your hand
To solidify the introduction, extend your right hand so the other person can shake it. Give your hand a flat palm and hold her hand when you shake hands. Squeeze his hand slowly, according to the pressure that the other person puts on his hand.
Why is shaking hands important? When you interact with it (in this case, physically), the brain sends signals to elevate your mood
Step 5. Remember the name and try to say it often
When he says his name, remember it and mention it in conversation. This builds a warm relationship with the other person and makes you feel like an “old friend”.
- For example, you could say, "So Princess, what is your purpose in coming here?" right after he said her name. After that, you can mention her name again by saying, "Oh yes Princess, what is your favorite music?"
- To make it easier to remember his name, associate his name with a characteristic you saw or studied. For example, you could say to yourself "Princess is wearing a purple sweater" or "Jojo likes playing badminton."
Method 2 of 3: Enjoying Chat
Step 1. Make eye contact
Warm interaction does not occur when two people look at each other in opposite directions. You have to look him in the eye to keep the conversation going. However, find the right balance. Don't stare at him for too long, but don't always avoid looking him in the eye either.
In general, make more eye contact when you are speaking than when you are listening to the other person
Step 2. Ask open-ended questions
Some questions can "shut down" the chat while others can keep it going. If you want to chat with someone you've never met, start the conversation by asking an open-ended question. These types of questions allow you to search for a variety of answers or responses, rather than just “yes” or “no” answers.
Open-ended questions usually begin with a question word “what”, “how”, or “why”, such as “How did you get to know Tabitha?”
Step 3. Listen to the other person
If you want to ask the other person a question, you need to show that you want to hear the answer. Practice active listening skills by turning your face to the other person and listening to what they are saying. Try to fully understand the message before responding.
Step 4. Describe what the other person is saying in your own words
Show that you are listening by paraphrasing what he is saying. Paraphrasing ensures that you get the right message and gives the other person an opportunity to clarify what he's saying if you don't understand his message.
You can paraphrase what he's saying by saying, "So, that sounds/sounds like…" or "If I don't misunderstand, …"
Method 3 of 3: Maintaining Interaction
Step 1. Keep showing the positive side
People will enjoy the interaction more if you keep the conversation positive. Don't assume that other people won't like you or try to avoid you. Keep the conversation positive and display a friendly and warm attitude.
Even if you feel nervous or don't show your best self-esteem, try to appear confident. Trying to "step back" from the conversation or appear frightened will only make the other person want to end the conversation quickly. If you're feeling nervous, pretend to be calm until you finally feel confident
Step 2. Let the other person talk about himself
For most people, once they know you want to listen, they can talk for hours. In general, people like to talk about themselves, their own opinions or interests. “Take advantage of” this knowledge and stay focused on the other person.
Show interest in what he's saying by nodding or responding with comments like "Wow?" or “Really?”
Step 3. Show your witty side
People are often fascinated by someone who can make them laugh. However, they won't just sit back and listen to every joke. Instead of telling the humor right away, provide some examples or "snippets" of humor that fit the context of the conversation.
For example, if both of you are waiting for someone or something, you can casually say, “Ouch! If I knew I had to wait this long, I would have brought the mattress to this place. Please forgive me if I start snoring."
Step 4. Look for common ground
People are attracted to people who can “understand” or think like them. Therefore, pay close attention to whether you and the other person have the same interests or opinions. Use these similarities to emphasize your compatibility and build a stronger relationship.
For example, you could say, "Wow, I feel that way too!" or “Ironic, huh? I grew up in a small town too, you know.”
Step 5. Don't over-share information or stories
Keep the topic light and neutral in the first conversation so you don't irritate the other person and want to end the conversation with you. While it's possible to discuss big topics with close friends, they are considered inappropriate topics to discuss with strangers. In addition, excessive sharing of chats or information also makes other people feel uncomfortable.
- For example, talking about a troubling health condition to someone you just met is usually considered inappropriate.
- Feel free to show the "fragile" side of the subject or topic discussed. This can build trust between the two of you. After all, sharing too much information at once can be frustrating.
Step 6. End the chat on a good note
The key to having a pleasant interaction with strangers is knowing the right time to end the chat quickly. Pay attention to his body language. Does he stay away from you or seem distracted by his phone or book? If so, this can be a sign to "split". Make sure you end the conversation on a positive note.
