Being a good boyfriend is not easy, especially in the early days of a relationship. Whether you and your boyfriend are currently in a relationship, or are on your way to your fifth anniversary, there are a few tips to follow if you want to be a good boyfriend and make your relationship even more intimate. To be a good boyfriend, you have to provide love and support while remaining independent. If you want to know how to do it, just follow these steps!
Step
Method 1 of 3: Opening Up
Step 1. Don't be too open at the start of the relationship
You have to make sure that there is enough space for the two of you to know and trust each other so that your relationship can thrive. If you try to go too far early in the relationship, it can frighten your boyfriend and prevent you from building a good future for your relationship. Be patient and realize that it takes time to build strong, long-lasting relationships. If you want your relationship not to run aground halfway, avoid the following:
- Don't force him to call you his girlfriend after a few dates; this can make him feel that this relationship is not his decision. Be patient and let him convince himself when the time is right to confess his love. If the two of you are compatible, it won't take much time.
- Don't talk about marriage and children until you've met his friends or his parents. Bringing up the topic too quickly can create tension and can disrupt or even end a relationship that could otherwise be a beautiful one.
- Although they say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, this doesn't mean you have to cook for him three times a day. You don't have to prove it this way; You just need to be by his side and listen to what he has to say, pay attention to him, and share interests.
Step 2. Be honest
Being honest with your boyfriend is very important, but being honest with yourself is just as important. If you overreact or make a mistake, you can admit your mistake and apologize. If you feel threatened or angry, you can tell him without blaming him.
- And the most important thing here is that you have to be very open about your feelings. For example, if he does or says something you don't like, tell him how it affected you, without blaming him or asking him to change.
- If you build a firm line of communication from the very beginning of the relationship, you'll know more quickly whether the relationship is going to last or is hopeless.
Step 3. State your feelings
Don't be afraid to share your wants, needs, and opinions, even if they may conflict with what he or she thinks. You don't live just to please him. Also, showing that you are an individual with his own needs and wants will make him interested in understanding who you are. If you can express your feelings comfortably, then he will feel the same way.
Remember not to express your feelings in a way that offends other people's opinions or lifestyle – you can express your feelings humbly but frankly, by being firm and keeping their feelings in mind
Step 4. Be yourself
Don't pretend just to impress him. You might think he likes a different type of girl, but usually you only conclude from the little things he says or implies and you're probably wrong. After all, he wants to date you, not a perfect imaginary figure. And if you really want to change because he's forcing you to be thinner, taller, prettier, or whatever, then this is a sign that the two of you aren't compatible.
- If he keeps urging you to change, it's not love, it's his attempt to control you.
- Don't pretend you have the same interests as her. This may be fun or "safe" at first but it can be very painful if he finds out that you're just faking it; he may think about your role in his life in an unrealistic way and this will hurt both of you in the end.
Method 2 of 3: Provide Support
Step 1. Find out what he's interested in
Remember what he likes to do and talk about. You don't have to act like you like his hobby, but at least try to understand why he likes it so much. If he likes a band, try to understand why. If he likes to play and act childish, remember that maybe this is just his way of releasing stress. In learning to accept their uniqueness, you will also learn more about yourself and ultimately decide whether you can spend the rest of your life with this person.
- You don't need to know all his interests. If he likes watching baseball but you don't like it, that's okay too.
- Asking her interests and talking about things that matter to her is more than enough.
Step 2. Learn to work together
In every healthy relationship there will be conflicts, big or small. Remember to stay true to yourself and avoid any form of selfishness. The essence of a relationship is cooperation and mutual help, not mutual use. In a team, you have to look after each other, not leave each other, and respect each other.
- In difficult times, cooperation can help you get out of trouble in a less hurtful way, where you are both responsible for solving the problem rather than expecting the other to do it.
- Avoid monotonous relationships where your relationship is centered on one thing. Take care of your relationship by adding variety and difference. Try new things together. Relationships aren't just about having fun, they're also about learning and growing together.
Step 3. Give more praise than criticism
If all you tell him is criticism or attack, he will be reluctant to meet you and will start thinking about leaving you. However, you also don't have to always agree with him just because he's your boyfriend. Wisdom is a good strategy in a mature relationship and setting boundaries and compromises is a relationship strategy that must be learned and applied.
- While you can provide valid criticism, you should say four positive things about it for every negative thing you say.
- Don't scold him just because you're in a bad mood or something isn't going the way it should.
Step 4. Learn to compromise
If you want to be a good boyfriend, then you have to learn to compromise rather than fight or get angry whenever things don't go your way. In order to compromise, both of you need to be able to discuss an issue calmly and rationally while trying to understand each other's point of view. Try to understand what your boyfriend wants instead of focusing on your own.
You don't want to be the girl who always gets what she wants just because your boyfriend always relents because you're always angry and upset when things don't go your way
Step 5. Give each other space
You have to support your boyfriend, but you also have to be able to "get along" with him when you're not really by his side. If you want to be a good boyfriend, then you have to make time for yourself, to hang out with your friends and to meet your boyfriend. He should know that you think about him and miss him when you're not around. If you feel insecure and doubt your relationship if you don't see it for even a second, then you have a problem.
- You should support your boyfriend if he just wants to hang out with his friends and not to go to "men only" events. You don't want your boyfriend to be the guy you know you have to carry around with his girlfriend.
- If you feel you deserve all of his time and attention, learn how not to be an obsessive boyfriend. Don't be an overprotective boyfriend; let him go have fun without feeling watched.
- Remember that he doesn't always need your help and that you are two different individuals and not just a couple. When he needs space to himself, don't be offended, accept it. It was his way to refresh his mind and to share his other interests with his other friends. But make sure that he knows that you are always there for him.
Method 3 of 3: Give Love
Step 1. Show your affection
There are various ways to show your affection, some even very obvious. How you do this will depend on how openly you want to show your affection. Affection is a sign of closeness, but it is not the same as intimacy – affection is showing openly that you care about someone and can be shown anytime, be it night or day, publicly or secretly. Think of ways to show your affection for your loved one, such as holding hands, touching their arm, kissing on the cheek, hugging, stroking their hair, providing support, praising them in front of others, etc.
- Sometimes guys like it when his girlfriend calls him special names, like "Darling" and "Love". But don't overdo it. Your boyfriend may feel uncomfortable if you call him "Daddy Bear," especially in public. The most important thing is to maintain good communication, so he knows how much he means in your life.
- You can also give text messages and love e-mails, but don't overdo it, as this will annoy you and make you seem too detached from you. Stuff like this does show that you like him, and you want your relationship to last forever, but too much can scare him off!
Step 2. Flirt with your boyfriend
Don't be afraid to tease him. Most men really like it when their girlfriend is sexy, classy, and full of confidence. Confidence means being proud of your own skin, you can achieve this effortlessly if you accept yourself as you are and believe in your worth. You don't have to push yourself to be cheerful and popular if this doesn't suit your style, however, be your best at taking care of your appearance and believing that you deserve respect.
Step 3. Give gifts
When you're in a relationship, it's great to exchange gifts. Men love to be given gifts and giving them a gift shows that he means a lot to you. Don't overdo it – only give gifts when you truly love him and want to tell him how much he means to you. You don't want him to think you're trying to buy his attention.
Make something for him. Paper flowers, heart-shaped decorations, something creative that shows your personality so that when he sees it he will think of you and smile. If you like music, or play an instrument, play a song for him (better if you write the song yourself). You can also upload the video of your song to Youtube
Step 4. Don't be jealous
You have to show your love, but not so much that you feel jealous if your boyfriend talks to, or even just mentions, another woman's name. Nothing gets rid of a guy's attraction faster than a girlfriend who is always insecure and jealous of the other women in his life. Your boyfriend will appreciate you more if you are nice to his girlfriends than if you talk about how ugly or annoying every girl you see is.
If he's with friends, don't text him every two seconds to make sure he's not talking to another girl. This will only show that you don't believe it
Tips
- Don't let your friends rule your relationship. This is your relationship, not someone else's. Of course, they have their own opinions, just as you have opinions about the relationship of your friends. However, you don't always have to listen to all your friends' suggestions if you don't want to. And realize that sometimes they just don't feel right with your boyfriend – not everyone has to be on good terms with other people. Just listen to what your friends have to say and ask them to try to "accept" your boyfriend into their life.
- Don't be afraid of your appearance. If he wants to date you, he'll think you're attractive.
- Appreciate all the good things in your relationship. Men feel comfortable when they are valued. So do you, don't you? Learn to thank him for things he does, like when he drives you home. The things he does for you show that he values you. Not all women have a good relationship, appreciate the relationship you have.
- Tell him he's right when he's right. It can give him confidence, as well as admitting your guilt when you really did; This is a good way to defuse conflict in a relationship. Learn these things early in the relationship and you will have the foundation for a strong relationship.
- Never let other people control your life, and your boyfriend is no exception. Don't let him pressure you; however, be open about everything, including the consequences of his request to you. So are you, don't try to manage his life.
- Don't try to change it. Just tell him the things you like, if he loves you, he will try to do it another time. If he or she is very different from the person you hope to live with in the future, consider finding the person you are looking forward to and taking this relationship as a lesson.
- Try to establish good relations with friends and family. These people are usually the people who mean the most to him, and hearing good things about you from them means a lot to him. Try to make friends with his friends and relatives. Make sure you respect their parents and make sure they like you. Try doing little things for her, like getting close to her mom or shopping with her sister.
- When you have dinner together and he offers to pay, decline first. This shows that you are not just after the money. But remember, if the guy you like is a bit conservative, he may be pushing to pay. In this case, let him pay so as not to hurt his feelings.
- Understand that all relationships are different and there is no general way to be a good boyfriend because everyone has different tastes.
- If your boyfriend is passive towards you, it doesn't mean he doesn't love you. He may be shy or introverted. Maybe he's never dated before and doesn't know what to do. Or maybe he's not a guy who likes to show his feelings but has very strong feelings for you. Talk about what makes him like and try to understand him. Maybe he expects you to take more initiative, because you have more experience than he does. Or maybe that's just the way it is and you have to accept it.
Warning
- Jealousy is a very dangerous emotion. Don't make her jealous on purpose. In the long run, it will make him distrust you anymore.
- Don't bother him. Annoying him by calling him constantly, getting angry when he is with his friends, forcing him to spend more time with you, complaining about other people all the time, asking for approval all the time (for example, by always ending sentences with "am I right?"), etc.
- Don't tease his friends! No matter how handsome they are, you have to convince your boyfriend he is the only man for you. If you feel the need to flirt with them, it means that you are not ready to be faithful in a relationship.
- It's okay to tell your girl friends about him, but remember, you have to respect him by not sharing anything embarrassing, secretive, or rude (don't tell them you kissed!). You can tell how your relationship is going, but don't let them interfere in your relationship, unless you're experiencing abuse or something dangerous happens, in which case, tell everything and let them help you leave it. If you want to share personal information about your relationship, let him know and allow him to do the same; but don't let him talk about you like an object.
- Do not lie. Be honest at all times, and be open about things. Don't hold back your feelings, even if you're embarrassed to say them, as this can lead to problems in your relationship. Don't hide anything – sometimes you have to say something to explain things that would otherwise be misunderstood.
- Don't test your boyfriend just to see how he reacts. It's disgraceful, disrespectful, and unfair. You don't want him to do the same to you. It's the same as forcing your boyfriend to have sex with you.
- Don't look at his phone unless he allows it. Ask him to act like that towards you too.
- Know the difference between constructive criticism and criticism that just denigrates someone's character because you wish they had a different trait.
