Have you ever had a crush on the girl you chatted with on Facebook? If you really enjoy chatting with a cute girl you like, there's nothing wrong with taking her to the next level by asking her to be your boyfriend. All you have to do is be a great online chatter and show him how much you love him.
Step
Part 1 of 3: Starting an Online Chat
Step 1. Make sure that the girl is still alone
If you want to have a boyfriend through Facebook chat, the first thing you have to do is make sure that the girl accepts your PDKT. Of course it's pretty clear here that you should first check his profile to see if he's single or not, but maybe it's not that simple. You may have to dig a little deeper. For example, the girl might be dating someone who isn't registered on Facebook and deliberately doesn't confirm the relationship status on their profile. It could be that he deliberately wrote "married" to one of his female friends as a joke, while in fact he was dating someone else, or he was actually seriously dating someone else. How do you make sure? Here are some tips:
- Check out the collection of photos. Are there many photos of him alone with other men? Did a lot of people comment on how “cute” the photos are? If so, it means that the girl already has one.
- Check out his Facebook wall. Is there a guy whose walls the girl often writes on, or a guy who seems to be frequently spoken to? If so, maybe that guy is her boyfriend.
- Pay attention to whether he often displays many mysterious messages that disguise the fact that he is looking for someone? These messages can be love songs, winking emoticons, or comments about liking someone that give off a bad signal. This could be a sign that he likes or is dating someone but doesn't want to open up about it.
- However, if it looks like he's not really looking for someone and is just making a crush, it's perfectly fine if you want to flirt!
Step 2. Make sure your profile is attractive
It doesn't matter whether you know the girl or not, the important thing is that your profile should be interesting and up-to-date. If the girl is used to chatting with you a lot, or frequently commenting on your Facebook posts, she is likely snooping on your profile. If so, you must post fun, supportive photos and an interesting profile, plus some comments that can make him laugh. Here are some ways to make your profile attractive to the girls you chat with:
- Post a profile photo that doesn't seem arrogant and really shows your face. Generally girls like men who are real, not fake.
- Post some interesting links or video clips on your timeline, but don't do it too often as it will make you feel like you have nothing else to do.
- Take a look at your other photos and make sure they don't make you look immature or flirty.
Step 3. Don't start chatting right away as soon as he's online
If you want to play nice and get a girl without being pushy, give her at least 10-15 online statuses before you ask, "Hey, how are you?" This will show that you're not just hanging out on Facebook waiting for him to come online, but that you're just coincidental and want to ask how he's doing. The risk, of course, is that you'll be at odds if you find the girl logged off after two minutes, but at least this way you'll look cooler if you're willing to wait a bit longer for the girl to be online before deciding to chat.
If he's online using his phone (you can see his logo in the chat bar), hold on, because it might not be the right time to talk to him. Maybe he was busy and didn't even realize he had entered the chat because the Facebook application was active on his cellphone
Step 4. Casually say hello
If you decide to send a message, start with a light, casual greeting, so as not to come across as stalking his profile. You can say, "Oii, how are you?" or “How was his day?”, or ask a simple question like how was the result of the ball game he was participating in, or what he thought about the math test in the class you were taking together. No need to bother formulating the most powerful comments once they meet. What matters is how to start the conversation. In fact, if you've been trying too hard to amaze you, it'll actually accentuate your real intentions.
- If you've never chatted with him in person, make sure he already knows who you are. Many people have Facebook friends but forget where they were in the real world.
- Just say something like, "How are you?" or another question that demands an immediate answer, such as, “How was the ball game?” to start a chat.
Step 5. Propose an interesting topic
Once you've had a successful conversation, you can start talking about topics that interest the girl and make her want to continue the conversation. It all depends on your own interests and estimates of what the girl might like. You can talk about gossip at school (but don't overdo it), subjects, classes or teachers you both enjoy, the local newspaper buzz, or vacation plans after a grade-up exam.
If he's interested, he's bound to respond a lot, make funny comments, and ask questions. If he's keeping quiet, maybe you should change the subject
Step 6. Start building similarities between you
If you don't know him that well, you can check his Facebook profile to find out more about him, such as where his favorite band comes from, what his hobbies are, whether he likes jogging or mountain climbing. Don't say outright that you saw his profile, but express it naturally in conversation. You can also build connections through memories of growing up in the same place, playing the same sport, sharing political views, or other topics.
Don't think too much if you don't have anything in common. You can still build a close relationship just by sharing one or two of the same hobbies. You don't have to be exactly the same about music, books and sports to start dating
Part 2 of 3: Keeping Him Interested
Step 1. Show that you like him
If you want the girl to keep talking, let her know that you really like and care about her. At first, keep the conversation light and relaxed, but slowly slip in compliments and encouragement to allow the conversation to develop. You can say, "It was nice chatting with you." or “You make me laugh.” Let him know that you really value his personality and enjoy the chat.
You can even carefully compliment her appearance, from one of the photos the girl has posted. Say, “That dress is beautiful” or “Your hair is beautiful like that.” But don't overdo it, so that he doesn't freak out
Step 2. Don't be too pushy
Making interesting conversations from the internet and connecting with a girl via Facebook, that's great. But if you're always waiting for him to be online, texting him as soon as he shows up, and a million messages when he doesn't reply, it's definitely not natural. Make sure that the two of you are texting each other a fair amount, that you're not hanging out on Facebook 27 hours a week, and that he's really interested in chatting with you.
Don't bother him thinking you're always hanging out on Facebook every time he shows up. Leave him uncertain whether you will show up or not
Step 3. Show that you have another life outside of Facebook
If you want the girl to take an interest in you, show that you have more important things to do besides uploading photos to Facebook. You can talk about your long-awaited weekend vacation plans all afternoon while chatting, or just mention briefly about the friends you'd like to meet. There's no need to lie just to make your life look cool, the important thing is that the girl has to see that you're not a guy who only works on Facebook.
If you're going to celebrate Aunt Hani's 50th birthday, don't report that. Just say, "I'll go first, yes, there is something to meet,". Make it subtle enough to let him know you're busy, without revealing all the details
Step 4. Consider subtly offending the girl's profile or posts on Facebook
It might seem scary at first, but once you get to know him, you can chat about some of the things he has on display. If he displays a photo of himself and his friends on vacation at Lake Toba, ask how the trip was. If he puts up an article that he likes, try talking about it - as long as it doesn't end in a debate and a fight. All of this feeds and strengthens the conversation.
Don't do this early in the conversation. Use it as ammunition if you happen to run out of chatter
Step 5. Show that you really care
If you really want to grab the girl's attention, show that you really care who she is as an individual. If he mentions something, such as a dance performance that will be held in the future, bring it up the next time you meet and ask how it went. If you see her at school and she seems to be wearing a new dress or getting a haircut, give her a compliment (but don't overdo it to the point of horrifying her). Just show that you really care about how he looks and what he says.
- You can say, “How was yesterday's math test? Is it really as difficult as you say?” Or, “Did you have fun on your uncle's birthday yesterday?” This will show that you care and pay attention to the details of the news he has conveyed in the past.
- If you need to remember what we were talking about, check past conversations.
Step 6. Resign or sign off while the chat is hot
Another way you can keep him interested in you is to end and back off as the conversation gets warmer. You don't want to have such a great conversation and then run out of words before you finally have to say goodbye. Look for moments where the conversation is fun, then start slowly ending it before finally stepping back from Facebook to make him curious.
- Of course, you still have to be nice and good-bye, not just run away.
- This advice also applies to face-to-face chat situations. Say goodbye when the conversation is exciting, rather than when the conversation starts to get stale, so that your impression is still good in his eyes.
Part 3 of 3: Making Him Your Girlfriend
Step 1. Consider asking her out online
You can ask a girl out, or even ask for a boyfriend, via Facebook. Although there are some girls who prefer to be invited in person, but if the bond between you is strong from the internet and is sure the response will be good, there's nothing wrong with asking her out on a date or asking for her hand directly via the internet. Many people will forbid this, but if you think this is the right thing to do for your relationship, find a good moment and ask him to be your girlfriend.
Asking for a date from the internet can reduce the burden between the two of you. You don't have to worry too much about trying to say the perfect thing because it's typed anyway, and he doesn't have to worry about answering for the same reason
Step 2. Spend time with him in person
Even if you fall in love with him over the internet, you'll be able to get a better feel for his character, and whether your relationship is compatible or not, by meeting and spending time together in person. If you go to the same school or live close by, start by suggesting hanging out with your other friends, then see if there's an opportunity to just get together. Even if only in the form of lunch, a walk, or watching a movie. That way you can feel if you guys really match.
Take it easy. Say, “I want to hang out at the mall with my friends this weekend. Wanna join?" Or, “Want to watch the carnival tonight? I'm going there with my friends."
Step 3. Make sure that your feelings are reciprocated
It doesn't matter if you want to ask the two of you out on a date or just chat from the internet, before asking, make sure that the girl really likes you more than just a friend. Although it seems familiar, it's not impossible that he thinks you're nothing more than a friend, or even that he actually has a crush on someone else. When you're with or talking to him, notice if his face is genuinely happy to see you, if he's flirting a little bit, and if he's asking questions about your life. Think and consider all of this to come to a conclusion whether he likes you.
Of course it is difficult, and you are not a psychic who can read minds. But it's a lot harder to tell if he really likes you if you're just chatting on Facebook, because you won't be able to pick up on subtle things like tone of voice and personality if you don't spend a lot of time meeting face to face
Step 4. Find the right time to invite her
If you decide to ask him to be your girlfriend, find a good time, be it online or face-to-face. If you're asking online, you'll need to find opportunities in the middle of a conversation when you're complimenting each other, having a fun chat, or talking about the disappointment of having to part too soon. If you're meeting face to face, make sure that you're alone, that he's in a good mood, and that you really connect with him when you ask.
When the time is right, tell him that you really like him, and would be very happy if he agreed to be a girlfriend. Don't worry about convoluted words. He'll even prefer it when you're straightforward. Say, “I'm so glad I got to know you. You are smart, funny, and easy to talk to. I will be happy if you want to be my girlfriend.”
Step 5. Show appropriate reactions
Whether he accepts or refuses, you just have to show a reaction that makes you seem like a good grown man. If he accepts to be your boyfriend, jump in and dance a little, let him see how happy and sad you are. If he refuses, act like it's no big deal. Say that you look forward to being friends and that you appreciate his honesty.
