If you like a guy and aren't sure that he feels the same way, it can cause stress and self-doubt. If you're in doubt whether a guy is just playing with you or not, you need to reflect on the things he does and says when you're together. While there's no hard evidence to tell if he's just playing with you or not other than asking or catching him off guard, there are plenty of signs that he's not being honest with you, and it's important that you act on it as quickly as possible.
Step
Part 1 of 3: Watching What He Does
Step 1. Notice if he only spends time with you in certain areas
One way to tell if he's just playing with you is to see if he feels comfortable traveling with you anywhere or if he gets tensed or refuses to travel to other places or go on adventures together. If he reacted that way, maybe he had met other women in other areas and didn't want to meet them by accident. To be more sure that he is playing you, casually ask him to go to a restaurant, movie theater, or other park to see if he will react differently.
- If he's really playing with you, he'll probably do something to pretend. If you try to change your usual schedule, you might be able to see the fakes.
- Ask yourself whether he always sets your goals or not. Of course, maybe he really wants to be in control, but maybe this is how he wants to steer you away from a place where he's more likely to meet his other girlfriends.
Step 2. Pay attention to whether he is lazy to meet your friends or meet you with his friends
If your boyfriend never wants to see your friends, it may be a sign he doesn't want to make the relationship a serious commitment. If he doesn't want to meet you with his friends, it may be a sign of the same thing, he is also worried that his friends will tell you about other women he has met. However, if you've been in a relationship for a long time but he doesn't show any interest in meeting your friends or vice versa, that's a sign of danger.
- If he doesn't want to play a part in your life, then he doesn't want to take it too seriously.
- However, if you introduce him too quickly to your friends, or even your family after just a few weeks of dating, you may be rushing too much. He may have acceptable reasons for not rushing, such as wanting to confirm his relationship with you, or giving his friends time to get used to you as his new girlfriend because he recently broke up with a serious relationship.
Step 3. Notice if he acts strangely when he meets you in public
If he's acting fine when it's just you around, but suddenly turns cold when he meets you at the mall or in front of a restaurant, there's something wrong. Either he's acting weird because he's meeting other girls or he doesn't want to be seen with you, or because he doesn't want his friends or other people to know he's dating you. Whatever the reason, this is something you should be concerned about.
- If he really loves you, he should be happy to see you and even pay attention to you. Of course, he doesn't have to be as considerate as when you're alone when you see him in public, but he should act like he really wants to see you.
- Check his movements. Does he make eye contact and move toward you? If so, great. However, if he moves away from you, crosses his arms in front of his chest, and looks around and not at you, he is trying to keep his distance from you.
Step 4. Pay attention if he hesitates to show his affection in public
If you're dating him but he acts like brother and sister, ask yourself why, If he's playing tricks on you, he doesn't want to show other people that he's dating you, either because he's in a relationship with another girl or he wants to keep it visible. approachable. Even though not all guys enjoy holding hands, for example, he will still show his affection for you in other ways if he really loves you.
Don't pressure him to show his affection in public quickly, but if you've been on a few dates and he still keeps his distance from you when you're together, this is something to worry about
Step 5. Notice if he is nice to you but then walks away
If he's affectionate, sweet, kind, and wants to kiss you every minute, then the next time he acts like he doesn't know who you are, he's probably playing a joke on you. Maybe some days his mood is wanting to spend time with you, but sometimes with other people. Whatever that means, he's more likely to spend time with other girls or with his friends, if his mood swings a lot, he's definitely playing games with you.
Think about it: does he often leave you confused about how he really feels about you or about your relationship with him? If so, it's probably because he's playing with your emotions
Step 6. See if he ever gives up a night out with his friends for you
If your boyfriend is playing games with you, he will never think of you first. He will choose to spend the night with his friends, but he will only spend some time with you which you can conclude when his friends are busy or he is not on certain events. If he really likes you, he will prioritize you, not social reserves. If you want to know if he's playing with you or not, pay attention to whether he's ever sacrificed a night out with his friends to spend a good night with you.
If your boyfriend is serious about you, he'll always be happier spending time with you than with his friends. Even if you don't mean to make him abandon his friends or social life completely, if he doesn't compromise at all for you, he may be playing a prank on you
Step 7. See if he acts suspiciously with his phone
One of the deadly signs to find out if a guy is playing you is when he is very secretive with his cell phone. If he's always checking his phone and typing away from you, going out to pick up the phone without telling you who's calling, or going for hours without picking up his phone without an explanation, he's probably playing a joke on you. Of course, some guys are very protective of their privacy and that's normal, but if he's always playing with his phone and you never know what he's doing, it's probably a red flag that he's playing with you.
- Think about it: does he ever leave his phone, even for a moment, or does he always have it in his pocket? Even if you don't want to see him, if you see him panicking every time you see who's calling or texting him, it might be a problem for you.
- Another thing you can pay attention to is whether or not he actually turns off his phone when spending time with you. While this may be a nice way to show his full attention to you, it may also be a way to prevent other girls from calling him when you're with him.
Part 2 of 3: Paying attention to his words
Step 1. Notice if he's always telling you he's too busy for you but always seems to have time for someone else
If you always hear him tell you that he's busy with you, that he doesn't have ten minutes for anyone, but then you find out that he's spending the evening with his friends, this might be a sign that he's playing games with you. The reality is that if a guy really wants to spend time with you, he will find time. There are some exceptions though, if he's very busy but he's spending time with other people, you should be worried about this.
If he says he's busy studying or working, then you find him doing something else, even if he's just spending time with his sibling, he's playing a joke on you. If he cares about you, he will tell the truth instead of lying
Step 2. See if he's hesitant to do anything for the next two weeks
If your boyfriend tries to change the subject every time you talk about the future, even if you're only talking about vacation plans that are a month away, this may be a sign he's playing a joke on you. If he's serious about you, he'll see you as part of his future and won't back down when you talk about it.
- Of course, if you've only been dating for three weeks but you've already talked about marriage, it's normal for him to be scared, but if you're just talking about what you're going to do in the next month, he shouldn't be worried if he loves you.
- Pay attention to how he talks about you and his relationship with you. If he never brings up the future at all or incorporates you into his future plans, maybe he's playing Ana
Step 3. Notice if he hasn't told his friends about you
If you end up meeting her friends on purpose or not, and they say something like, "I didn't know she had a boyfriend…" or look surprised at your presence, it may be because your boyfriend doesn't think about your relationship seriously enough to make you feel better. he told his friends. If he really cares about you and you've been with him for a long time, he should be happy with the relationship and want to tell his friends about you.
- If he's cute when it's just the two of you, but acts more like a friend or even stays away when he's with friends, he probably just wants to be with you without wanting anything serious.
- Of course, some guys are willing to be manly in front of their friends, and maybe he won't shower you with kisses when they meet. However, if he doesn't tell them about you at all, he may be playing a joke on you.
Step 4. Notice if he hesitates to call you his girlfriend
If you think of him as a lover and have only been with him for a few months, but you never hear the word “girlfriend” come out of his mouth, he probably doesn't take the relationship as seriously as you do. If he introduces you to everyone as his friend or even seems displeased when you call him your girlfriend, he may be playing a prank on you.
- Sometimes words speak louder than actions, and if he refuses to call you his girlfriend when you've been dating for a long time, there must be a reason behind it.
- He may be afraid to commit without toying with you. If this is the case, you should talk about it.
Step 5. Pay attention to how she talks to other women
If you want to know if he's playing with you or not, pay attention to how he talks to other women he knows. Sure, he might appear polite and disinterested in other women if you stand next to him, but if you see him out of the corner of your eye you're talking to a girl on the other side of the room and she looks really flirty, then maybe she's playing you.
- If he really likes you, he won't talk to other women in a seductive tone. Sure, he can still talk to them and shouldn't ignore other girls besides you, but if you can see how he talks to other girls who show interest in more than just friendship, he may be playing a game with you.
- While you don't want to spy on her or get too obsessive, if one of your friends is at a party and sees her talking to another girl, ask your friend what she looks like. While your friend shouldn't be too obvious to be watching, you may be able to get a clearer picture this way than if you were in the room.
Step 6. Notice if he often gives excuses
One of the classic signs of a playboy is a man full of reason. He may seem smooth and reassuring to the point where you don't even realize he's lying to you. He may tell you that his grandmother is sick, that his dog needs to go to the vet, or that he forgot your date because he “slept” or had to visit a friend. Sure, things can happen, but if you notice that he always has the perfect excuse every time he lets you down., maybe he is playing you.
- If you've heard more than two times the “phone is dead” excuse, this probably isn't the real reason why he's not calling you back.
- If he looks very sweet and sorry when he gives these excuses, he's probably covering up a lie.
Step 7. Notice if he looks tense when you ask him about his evening
Another way to tell if he's playing you or not is to directly ask him how his evening was if he said he was staying over or spending time with friends. While you don't need to go into the small details of the evening, if you're casually asking him what's going on, whether it's a question about what movies he watches when he's alone or which bars he goes to with friends, check his gestures and her words to notice if she tenses up, starts to stutter, or starts to get uncomfortable.
- Even if you don't want to interrogate him, if you ask him a few questions without seeming too concerned about him, you might catch him lying.
- Ask him while doing something else, like playing with your phone, so he doesn't notice you're trying to figure it out.
Part 3 of 3: Finding Out For Sure
Step 1. Ask him
If you want to know if a guy is playing you or not, the easiest way is to ask him. While you may not want to know if he's cheating on you or not, you can ask him about your relationship with him. If he doesn't feel the same way you do, you'd better find out now than later. Find a time when you're alone with him and ask him what he thinks about you and his future with you.
- While not easy, it is much better than wondering for months. You will get a definite answer, now and forever. And if he's clearly lying, you'll be able to see it too.
- If you want to be brave, you can directly ask him if he's having an affair or not. Point out anything suspicious that makes you think so.
Step 2. Ask your friends what they think
While it's best to ask your boyfriend directly, you can also get good feedback from your friends. They have noticed your evolving situation and may have an outside opinion on your relationship. They may even have a better feeling about whether or not your boyfriend is playing with you because they may have seen him with other women without you and had a different impression.
- Ask your friends to be honest with you. Don't let them lie to you just to protect your feelings.
- If you want, they can investigate a bit. If it's not going to be obvious, you can ask one of your friends to come over casually to a place where your boyfriend usually goes to watch him and see how he interacts with other girls. Of course if he finds out you sent a spy to keep an eye on him, he'll keep his head down.
Step 3. Try to follow your lover
Well, if you really don't care about getting caught or breaking his trust, another thing you can do is stalk your boyfriend after spending time together, or when you know a certain place he's going to see what he's up to. You can follow him by driving a certain distance, walking, or taking the bus to keep him as far away as possible so he can't see you and make sure you've made up some kind of story in case he catches you off guard. This way, you can tell if he's meeting another girl - or if he's coming home to play with his cat.
Know that this is very risky and can get you caught off guard. If you get caught and he hasn't done anything wrong, it could end your relationship, so make sure you're sure that it's a good idea to follow him before you start
Step 4. Go to places he doesn't expect
Another way to tell if he's playing you is to pop into his place unexpectedly. You can show up an hour before your appointment to see if any other women are there or if he's trying to explain things suspiciously. You can also stop by his place when you “happen to be in his area”, when he should be studying or working at home, to bring him coffee or a snack. When you come, notice if he looks happy or tense, as if he's hiding something - or someone.
Of course, it doesn't make sense that if you suddenly show up at his house, he'll be suspicious of you. But if you've been there before and it's normal, make sure you're natural
Step 5. Check his stuff - if you feel it's okay to break his trust
However, if you check his stuff, he won't believe you; If you're desperate and are absolutely sure you want to play behind him, you can check his phone or email, or even look for suspicious items in his room like women's clothes that don't really belong to you. This method is the last resort that you should do only if you really feel the need for an answer and the other methods don't work.
- One problem with checking his belongings is that even when you have found evidence, you have to admit that you checked your lover's belongings, if you want to accuse him. This will make him angry with you and not focus on the main thing anymore.
- If you check his phone, prepare an excuse in case he catches you. You can say that your phone is off and you are looking for a restaurant for dinner or that you need to check your e-mail right away and so on. Although these reasons are not very convincing, it is better than nothing.
Step 6. Try to catch the lie
You can also catch your boyfriend lying to you to see if he's playing you or not. If he says he was spending time with friends or relatives one night, when you meet them you can ask how they spent the night together; if they look confused, you know he's lying. If he says he has to stay home because his brother is having a problem, you can ask him the next day how his brother is doing; if he reacts not knowing what you are talking about, maybe he has forgotten his own lie,
You can even ask him simple things like the movies he watched when he watched it with his friends. If he looks embarrassed or clearly doesn't know the answer, you know he's playing a joke on you
Step 7. Even if you have no proof, trust your instincts
If you feel that your boyfriend is not being sincere even though you can't find any evidence through the examination, it may be time to end your relationship. He may not date other girls, but he can still play tricks on you because he doesn't feel the same way you do. As long as you're sure that you're not really the jealous type and that you really have reason to worry, if you feel like he's playing tricks on you, it's time for you to let go.
When you are with a man who truly loves you and is there for you alone, you will know it. You don't have to spend hours calling him and wanting to know where he is so you don't have to resort to low-key actions like checking his stuff or stalking him for no reason to. You'll know when he's 100% there for you and that's a really great feeling
Tips
- Remember, if he's playing with you, let it go. If you don't let it go, it will become a cannon that will shatter your heart. Those memories will kill, haunt you forever, and give you nightmares.
- If you can't let go. think about the things he did that hurt and hurt your feelings.
- All men are stupid sometimes, it's their nature.
- It may be hard for you to let go, but when you have to, really, let go.
- Remember, there are a lot of men out there alike and there are men who are better than her.
- Ask your best or closest friends (whichever that is) what they think about you. This method is VERY HELP.
- If he's dating a new girl and showing it off to you, do the same. Or read an article on how to find a fake lover.
- Forget him, because if he did it, he'll do it again.
Warning
- Don't ask his friends about him.
- Don't ask other people about him at all.
- Tell only your good friends.
- Never tell him that you like him.
