What is the difference between a good child and a bad child? Santa may be able to explain, but there are still many children who don't know the difference. Have you become a good child if you always listen in class, respect others, excel in school, and so on? Whatever the definition, a good child does not mean a perfect child. Good children are children who are disciplined and able to love, understand, and respect others. To make it easier to understand the meaning of good children, imagine children who go through life with the goal of becoming successful and happy adults. All parents want a child like this.
Step
Method 1 of 2: Behave Well
Step 1. Learn to accept responsibility
Children who listen to the advice of their parents (and others in authority) and do it well are usually considered good children. While this is true, all children need to learn to take responsibility for what they have to do. If you want to be the best, learn to accept the fact that you have to do things for the good of yourself and others.
- In order to be a good child, develop good character so that you can live life as a good, happy, and successful adult. The purpose of being a good child is not to lighten the burden on parents (although they will gladly welcome it).
- For example: you have to be responsible for doing your homework and tidying your bedroom without having to be reminded or objected. These good habits make you more motivated, independent, and successful in your personal and professional life as an adult.
Step 2. Control your emotions
Everyone (including adults) gets angry, frustrated, complains, or feels depressed sometimes. Denying or ignoring these emotions is not a helpful way. Follow these instructions to control your emotions.
- Children must learn to control their emotions. If you feel angry, deal with it by taking deep breaths, inhaling through your nose and then exhaling through your mouth while counting from 1 to 5 to calm yourself and control your emotions. That way, you can think clearly to find out what triggers your anger and what needs to be changed so that the problem can be handled properly.
- Uncontrolled anger is the cause of bad behavior. Many young children throw tantrums when they feel disappointed, sad, confused, or lonely. These emotions will arise if you are bullied at school, ignored during group activities, or rejected by friends. Tell your parents if you are feeling depressed. This method will also strengthen the relationship with them. Don't be shy about consulting a counselor or mental health professional if needed.
Step 3. Be honest and trustworthy
Maybe you've heard, "Good boys and girls always say the right thing." This is true because honesty is an important aspect of building a relationship based on mutual trust. This behavior is beneficial for oneself in childhood to adulthood.
- A healthy relationship can only be established if there is mutual trust. Trust can grow if there is honesty. Maybe you want to lie to your parents to escape punishment or not to disappoint them. This method is not useful, even hinders the establishment of a closer relationship with them.
- Even if your parents are very disappointed to hear the truth about what happened (for example: you didn't pass your exam because you were lazy to study, stole candy at the store, made fun of your classmates), they will feel proud that you chose to be honest. This is an important clue to mutual trust and growth.
Step 4. Work on overcoming shortcomings and learn from mistakes
The best children are also not free from mistakes. This is a natural thing in the growth process. In this case, what matters is what you do to correct the error. The ability to learn from mistakes is a sign of maturity that parents highly value.
- If you don't pass an exam because you're lazy to study, do you realize how important studying is? After being punished for reproaching your mother in front of others, do you know the importance of respecting other people? If a good child makes a mistake in the process of becoming an adult, he is able to use this experience to learn and improve himself.
- Even the most disciplined parent is able to accept their child's mistakes, especially if these aren't repeated mistakes. All parents will feel happy to see their children grow and mature. Learn from mistakes and don't make the same mistakes.
Step 5. Learn to solve problems independently
Difficulty dealing with problems in the right way leads children to misbehave so that they come across as "bad." Confusion and frustration lead them to make wrong decisions. On the other hand, the ability to recognize problems and find solutions allows them to rely on themselves and feel confident.
- Do you remember how proud your parents were when you managed to put the pieces together or write your name correctly? Even if you break a lock on a kitchen cupboard or make the whole house a mess, parents are still happy to realize the importance of self-reliance and problem-solving skills in everyday life.
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In general, children have problems because of conflicts with friends. Learn how to resolve conflict by reading the wikiHow articles in the "Family" category. Take the following steps so you can solve the problem:
- Try to understand what is going on. Give the opportunity to the friend who is in conflict with you to give an explanation according to his perspective.
- Don't make things worse by yelling, insulting, or physically hurting your friend even if you're very upset. Try to calm yourself so that the problem can be resolved properly.
- Try to understand each other. Explain to a friend how you feel by saying, "I'm upset because …" or "I feel …". After that, listen carefully when he speaks.
- Determine the best solution. Think of various possible solutions and choose the one that is best for everyone concerned.
Step 6. Know when to ask for help
As just stated, the ability to recognize a problem and solve it independently is a skill that is very beneficial for children (and adults). However, it's just as important to admit that you need someone else's help to solve the problem.
- When doing math homework, there's no point in "giving up" before trying to answer the problem yourself. It's the same if you don't want to ask for help because you insist on solving the problem yourself.
- Remember that problems may not necessarily be solved on their own. Parents are always willing to help their child who needs help and they will appreciate your willingness to ask for help as a positive thing. However, don't expect your parents to take care of all your problems because this is immature behavior.
- Decide when you should continue to find solutions on your own and when to ask for help. Since there is no reliable formula, you have to decide for yourself because only you can answer: have you tried to solve the problem as best you can and have trouble coming up with new ideas to get the best solution? If the answer is "yes", it's time for you to ask for help.
Method 2 of 2: Showing Concern
Step 1. Treat others the way you would like to be treated
Many people refer to this as the "golden rule" which is very useful to apply in everyday life. Children who behave according to the "golden rule" when interacting with parents, friends, family members, and others will be considered wise and mature.
- Before joining in on making fun of your classmates, consider how you would feel if you were treated the same way. Before throwing a tantrum because Mom asked for help with washing clothes, consider what it would be like if you were the one asking for help, but Mom refused.
- Good children always respect their parents. Because good children respect everyone, they also respect their parents. You will be rewarded if you show respect to others.
- As difficult as it is, these rules apply when interacting with brother and sister!
Step 2. Learn to understand other people's feelings
The ability to understand other people's feelings and the response that will be given is very useful when you have to determine how to behave in certain situations. For example: if your parents are struggling to pay your monthly bills, you know this isn't the time to ask for a video game or new shoes. Another example: your sister is upset because she lost a baseball game. Don't talk about the flaws in athletic training.
- Learn to "read" other people's facial expressions to identify their emotions. Go to a public place (eg to the mall) and start figuring out how they feel after watching their facial expressions.
- The ability to identify feelings is needed to show empathy as the basis of the three steps above (treat others the way you want to be treated, understand other people's emotions, and be compassionate to others). However, empathy is more than just knowing how the other person is feeling and being able to put yourself in someone else's shoes. Empathy means respecting other people and their feelings, even if their perspectives are different.
Step 3. Be a caring and loving child for others
Think about what you can do to help people who are suffering or in need. The world desperately needs people who are compassionate and ready to help. Why not start from childhood?
- One of the most important aspects of self-development is the ability to widen the "circle of care." Young children usually only think about their own needs and wants (eg snacks, new toys, etc.) As you get older, you begin to think about the feelings and needs of those closest to you, for example: family members and friends. In the end, you realize that there are many people around you who live in poverty.
- Think of small things you can do to help them, for example by raising public awareness, volunteering, and making a change starting with yourself. For example: do a good deed by donating canned food and biscuits that are piled up in the kitchen cupboards and then give them to those less fortunate.
- For example: share compassion in everyday life by standing up for a friend who is being bullied and making friends with him, for example by asking, "Want to play with me?" Another example: take your parents to a restaurant to buy more food and then take them to an orphanage that you pass by on your way home. You can do small things that make a big difference to other people.
Step 4. Thank the person who provided the help
If you already know how to help others, you will also understand better the people who help you. Appreciate everything they have done for you. This is one of the characters of a good child who plays an important role so that you can become a responsible and happy person.
- As a child, make it a habit to thank your parents. Take time to think about all they have done for you. Make a list to make it easier. You can give small gifts or souvenirs as appreciation, but the habit of saying "thank you" is enough to make parents feel proud and touched.
- To be more effective, explain why you are grateful. For example: "Thank you for always taking the time to help me with my math homework. My grades are better now. Thank you, ma'am."
Tips
- Accept that you are punished and don't complain. Apologize to your parents and try to correct your mistakes. Don't argue in self-defense. If you sincerely apologize, your parents might give you a lighter sentence.
- Do chores at home without being asked to show your parents that you are a responsible child and ready to help clean the house.
- Respect older people. They can provide helpful advice.
- Don't let anger get to you. When you start to get angry, try to control your emotions and calm yourself down. If you want to tantrum, immediately enter the room to vent emotions.
- Don't fight with family members because you're upset. Breathe deeply to calm yourself down.
