Do you always seem to start your day feeling uncomfortable and unhappy? If you find that negative thoughts are starting to take over your life, take action before the stress starts to overwhelm you. Learn to identify and get rid of negative thoughts, then replace them with positive thoughts. Not only will opportunities open up, but you will also have the power to change your frame of mind and change your day as well.
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Method 1 of 3: Getting Rid of Negative Thoughts
Step 1. Identify your negative thoughts
Some might immediately spring to mind, but if you have trouble pinpointing them, consider journaling. Write down a sentence or two describing the negative thoughts whenever you have them.
Look for thoughts that make you feel sad or discouraged such as: blaming yourself or feeling ashamed for things that aren't your fault, interpreting simple mistakes as indications of personal failure, or imagining small problems that are bigger than they really are (" little by little it becomes a hill")
Step 2. Stop the negative thoughts immediately
Once you've identified a negative thought, respond by saying something positive to yourself. For example, instead of saying, "I had a really bad morning," try saying something like, "It's a bad morning, but I'll have a better day." Keep yourself positive.
If you're having trouble, remember this one tip: never say something to yourself that you wouldn't say to anyone else. Remind yourself to stay positive, and it will become a habit
Step 3. Pay attention to your vocabulary
Do you often use absolute terms? For example, "I can never do this," or "I always screw this up." Absolute terms are often redundant and leave no room for explanation or understanding.
Your vocabulary includes what you say to others, as well as how you talk to yourself, both verbally and mentally
Step 4. Remove words that are too negative from your vocabulary
Extreme terms such as "terrible" and "disaster" should not be applied to minor annoyances or inconveniences. Softening your language can help bring negative experiences into a healthy perspective. Replace these words with encouraging thoughts or praise.
If you already use one of these words, immediately replace it with a term that is not too extreme in your mind. "Terrible" could be "unprofitable" or "not as good as I expected." "Disaster" can be an "inconvenience" or a "challenge."
Step 5. Turn the bad into good
There are very few situations that are either really good or really bad. Looking for the good in a confusing situation will help make a bad experience seem less severe. If you find yourself starting to think negative thoughts, stop immediately and consider a positive aspect.
For example: Imagine that your computer stops working, forcing you to replace its internal components. Even if it's uncomfortable, the experience also gives you the opportunity to learn new skills or solidify existing experiences
Method 2 of 3: Creating a Positive Day
Step 1. Start your day by thinking about 5 good things
There is no need for things to be soaring or ambitious. It could be something as simple as the smell of a cup of coffee or the strains of your favorite song. Thinking about these things and saying them out loud means that you start each day focusing on the positive. This will be the foundation that fuels the rest of your day so negativity will have a hard time growing.
While you may find it ridiculous to say such positive statements or affirmations, many studies have shown that saying positive things out loud will make you more inclined to believe what you are saying. You will be happier and more focused if you speak your positive thoughts
Step 2. Enjoy your day
Even though you may be busy, the little things can keep you in high spirits and give your mind little reason to get dragged into negative habits. Don't take things too seriously. Relax, laugh and smile. Take advantage of opportunities to socialize and surround yourself with positive, supportive people.
If you're feeling stressed, take a break and think about something other than the source of your stress
Step 3. Practice healthy habits
Negative thoughts and stress reinforce each other. Although negative thoughts can cause stress, other unhealthy lifestyle habits can also cause this problem. Try to eat fresh meat, eat as much nutritious food as possible, exercise regularly, and get enough sleep.
- You may find that the practice really is a great way to take your mind off negative thoughts.
- Avoid smoking, excessive drinking, or other habits that worsen your physical condition.
Step 4. Take control of your environment
You are not helpless to your thoughts. If you are not happy with something, change it. Playing music, layering clothes so you're neither too warm nor too cold, and adjusting the lights are some ways you can empower yourself to deal with the helplessness associated with stress.
After making various changes, congratulate yourself on improving your mood. Actively adjusting your mindset will make it easier for you to get rid of negative thoughts in the first place
Step 5. Unwind and relax in the evening
Find a quiet and comfortable place, then set aside time to relax. Mentally review your day and identify five things you're going through. Say one positive thing out loud or write it in a journal.
Maybe you can also consider writing down the things you are grateful for. By doing so, you may start to see the positive in things
Method 3 of 3: Asking for Outside Advice
Step 1. Find a counselor or therapist
If you're feeling overwhelmed by negative experiences, you'll probably gain a lot from talking to a counselor, in addition to practicing positive thinking. Find a therapist who is trained in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. The therapist can help train you to think positively.
Find a therapist you trust, ask a friend who has asked for counseling or therapy before. You can also get a referral from a doctor
Step 2. Make an appointment
Think of it as an examination of the state of mind. You don't have to go there if you're uncomfortable and there's no rule that says you have to see a therapist regularly.
Make an appointment with an open mind. Hopefully the counselor can help you. Otherwise, you can always find a counselor with whom you feel more comfortable
Step 3. Describe your negative feelings to the counselor
Remember that therapy is confidential and safe so you can be completely honest. The more honest you are with the counselor, the better his ability to help you will be.
Be sure to describe how the negative thoughts affect how you feel. Explain how often you experience it and what you usually do about it
Step 4. Make additional appointments if necessary
If you are comfortable with your therapist, make another appointment or two. Remember that it takes more than one session to get over your negative thoughts.
