Grieving is a process of tremendous emotional upheaval; no one can get rid of that feeling, except the person who experiences it. Is one of your close friends grieving? So what can you do to help him? Do not worry; as long as you have genuine intentions and are able to understand the grieving process she is going through, you are more likely to be able to help her through the stages of the process and move on to a better life afterward.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Understanding the Grieving Process
Step 1. Be patient
Remember, everyone has their own way of processing grief; some people take months, some people even years. In other words, there is no right or wrong way to grieve.
Step 2. Reassure your friend that it's okay to feel angry, scared, depressed, or guilty
The grieving process is a tremendous emotional upheaval; don't be surprised if today your friend seems very weak and the next day he is constantly screaming or even laughing.
Step 3. Embrace your friends
A person who is grieving often feels alone and isolated from his surroundings. Even if you can't give her all the answers to her worries, at least make sure you're always there to listen, hug, and give her the support she needs.
Method 2 of 3: Choosing the Right Words
Step 1. Acknowledge the loss
Help your friends boldly say the word “death”. Trying to smooth things over by saying, “I heard you just lost your husband, huh,” will only make her more upset. Her husband died, not disappeared; Don't be afraid to confirm the fact.
Step 2. Show him you care
Communicate honestly and openly with him. Remember, saying the phrase “sorry” is the right thing to do in this situation.
Step 3. Offer your mentoring
Don't hesitate to admit that you don't know what to do; but make it clear to your friends that you are willing to provide as much assistance as possible. He may ask you to help with sorting photos, shopping, or even cleaning the page. Contribute as much as you can.
Method 3 of 3: Helping a Grieving Friend
Step 1. Take the initiative to offer help or approach him immediately ready to help
- Bring food to your friends. People who are grieving often forget or lack appetite; therefore, occasionally try to bring his favorite food or snack so that his body still gets the nutritional intake it needs.
- Help him arrange the funeral. If your friend has never been abandoned by someone close to him or her, chances are that he or she doesn't understand how to organize a funeral. Contribute as much as you can; for example, you can help her write an obituary or find a location for a funeral procession. You can also help him find a religious leader or a specific party to be the speaker in the procession.
- Clean your friend's house. He may still be overcome with shock so that he is not able to function normally in his daily life. Therefore, offer to stay at his house (most likely the people closest to him will do the same), and offer to help with various household chores.
Step 2. Continue to provide needed support afterward
Everyone needs time to move on with life; help your friend by continuing to interact with him or her after the funeral. Call him, take him to lunch, and talk to him about the person who left him.
Step 3. Watch for symptoms of acute depression
A person who is grieving is prone to depression. This condition is actually natural; but if he's constantly having trouble sleeping, having trouble eating, and experiencing poor performance at work or school, it's likely that he needs extra help from the people around him.
- Everyone goes through the grieving process in their own way. If your friend's condition doesn't improve (or if he or she even admits to committing suicide), don't hesitate to intervene more deeply.
- Ask him to join a relevant support group or contact his doctor if he is constantly hallucinating, has difficulty with activities, or has a death-oriented mindset.
Tips
- Don't claim to understand his feelings unless you've been in a similar situation.
- Don't say, "He's in a better place." Trust me, your friends will not believe it because for them, the best place for that person is beside him, in this world.
- Don't rush it to get on with life; doing so will only make him angry or depressed. Remember, everyone has their own time to recover.
- Remember, everyone responds to grief in a different way. Of course you can't keep your mouth shut or talk about the person who left him at all; but make sure you don't talk about the person around him all the time either.
- Don't leave him alone, but don't stay by his side either. Give him a healthy distance.
- Hug him tight and convey your condolences.
- Don't force him to talk. Let him move in his own rhythm; Trust me, he'll tell you when he's ready to tell. Often times, people who are grieving fear that the same thing will happen to their loved ones again. Therefore, be a good friend; hug him and give him advice if he asks for it.
- Write words of encouragement on a greeting card to help your friend get through his or her grief.
