Sometimes one of the most difficult aspects of starting a new relationship is knowing if a potential partner is interested in you. Men seem very hard to read, and determining their level of attraction is a challenging undertaking. A little research combined with common sense and frank conversation can help you determine if it is love.
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Method 1 of 3: Reading Her Body Language
Step 1. Pay attention to his eyes
Men who are attracted to you tend to show it with their eyes. Some of the cues may seem contradictory, but it depends on the personality of the man.
- Men who are attracted to you are more likely to try to make eye contact. He'll look you in the eye when you talk, and you might catch him staring at you from across the room.
- A shy guy may avoid eye contact because he's nervous about talking to you. If he seems to be looking around awkwardly but not sure where to look, it may be a sign that he likes you. If he's just looking at his cell phone or looking at someone else, he may not be interested.
- Men's pupils tend to dilate when they desire. If his pupils are dilated (the black part is bigger than usual), he may be attracted to you.
Step 2. Pay attention to his posture
Men, like mammals, change their posture when trying to impress a woman of the same species.
- He will not cross his arms or legs. Crossed arms and legs is body language for "no, stay away!"
- He may lean toward you when he talks.
- He tends to stand tall with his shoulders straight to make him look taller and more impressive.
- Maybe he even seemed to move his pelvis slightly forward. Or, some men unknowingly (or knowingly) correct their masculinity when talking to someone they are attracted to.
Step 3. Pay attention to every touch
One of the most obvious signs of attraction is when he's looking for an excuse to touch you. If you're talking and he touches your arm or hand, he's probably testing to see if you'll react to his touch.
- Encourage him to continue touching by touching back. Gently touch or squeeze his hand and look him straight in the eye when you talk to him. You should be able to tell if he's interested by the response he gives.
- Remember that you should compare his touch on you to his normal habits. If he seems to be hugging everyone who comes his way, then his hug doesn't necessarily mean anything.
Step 4. Pay attention to facial cues like blush and smile
Guys who are attracted to you are more likely to smile and laugh at your stories, even if they're not really funny.
- If a guy is shy, his face is likely to turn red when you talk to him. Look for signs of redness on her cheeks or signs of sweaty palms (she may be rubbing her palms against her clothes or moving her hands).
- He tends to say something awkward or embarrassing and then blush when he's nervous. Try to make him feel more comfortable.
- Nervousness can be a sure sign of attraction. Do your best to make him feel comfortable by being nice and encouraging him to talk to you.
Step 5. Mimic motion detection
Both men and women will subconsciously imitate the movements of the person they are attracted to. This means that they imitate someone's behavior in an attempt to send the message that they are similar and that they are compatible.
You can test by doing something you wouldn't normally do, such as covering your mouth or stretching. See if he does the same too
Method 2 of 3: Recognizing Approach
Step 1. Compare his demeanor and tone of voice to you and the other person
The key to finding out if a guy is approaching you is to recognize the difference between the way he talks to you and the way he talks to other people.
- Some men try to make their voices sound deeper and more manly when talking to the woman they like.
- Sometimes guys will whisper or talk very quietly with someone they like. This makes you have to come closer to hear it, or it's a signal that the two of you have a secret bond.
Step 2. Notice his enthusiasm for your interests
If he seems overly interested in everything you have to say, he may be interested in you, not the interest itself. Very few people have exactly the same hobbies and interests, but everyone looks for common ground when starting a potential relationship.
Make sure you reply and also ask about their interests. Showing enthusiasm for the things he likes will send a signal that you are also interested. You'll also come across as selfless if you encourage him to share
Step 3. Check her dress habits
If he knows he's about to meet you, he may pay special attention to appearances. Notice if she looks like she's dressed better or if she's styling her hair more carefully than usual.
- It would be nice if you complimented his appearance if he seemed trying to look better in front of you.
- A guy who is willing to make himself look more charming to you may be a better potential lover than a guy who doesn't seem willing to put in the effort to impress you.
Step 4. Pay attention to the straightforward approach
A rant or a wink is an old sign of overt approach, and men who have no other idea of approach will follow suit.
Method 3 of 3: Distinguishing Love and Attraction
Step 1. Have a meaningful conversation
You need to be able to talk about a wide range of topics with someone in a love relationship. Make sure you have a two-way conversation with a guy.
- These topics can be anything from your hopes and dreams to past relationships to favorite celebrities.
- If he doesn't contribute to the conversation or doesn't seem to care about your opinion, he may not have a sense of reciprocity or he just isn't a great catch.
Step 2. Try pure dating
If you're in a physical relationship, try going on dates or spending time alone that doesn't involve anything physical. Having fun in a way that doesn't involve romance or passion is essential to a healthy relationship and it can be a means of distinguishing between a man who is attracted to you and a man who is only interested in your body.
Step 3. Get through difficult situations together
It's definitely not something you can control, but if one of you is going through something emotionally difficult, you can gauge the depth of his feelings for you.
- Be open about how you feel about the event and about your partner.
- Communicate your emotional needs with him, but remember that men are usually hesitant to share their emotions. This doesn't mean he isn't interested in you.
Step 4. Be honest about your feelings and see how they respond
If you love him and want to know if he feels the same way, share your feelings.
- If you tell him you love him, be aware that he may not reply right away. This does not mean the relationship is over; maybe he just needed time to process the idea.
- Pay attention to his body language when you express your feelings. If he immediately looks physically uncomfortable, he probably doesn't feel the same way.
- If he doesn't respond and seems indifferent, he probably doesn't really care about you.
Step 5. Talk about the future
Talking about the future has two functions. First, it's a way of assessing whether you both have the same goals and values, which hints at a long-term compatibility. Second, the conversation can reveal the feelings of someone who is only interested in short-term relationships.
- Start by talking about your personal goals and thoughts about the future.
- Then ask if he can imagine a future together with you.
- Know that goals and visions for the future can change a lot, especially when you are young. It's a good idea to periodically reassess the idea.
Step 6. Spend time with his family
If a guy invites you to spend time with his family, chances are he loves you. It was unlikely that he would introduce his family to a girl he didn't love. Getting to know his family can also let you know where he's from and what kind of family environment he's likely to run into.
- Reply by inviting him to spend time with your family.
- Even if his parents (or yours) do or say something embarrassing, it will become something to laugh about together later.
- Men are usually very close to their mothers. If you can impress his mom and get her to like you, the guy will be proud to take you to his house.
- Be nice to his family. Sometimes people are embarrassed about their own family situation. You can alienate them even more by making jokes, even if it's meant to be.
