You may feel lost and helpless when faced with certain problems, such as a breakup, the loss of a loved one, or loneliness. At that time, you feel the problem will never end. Even if you think that the problem at hand will never be resolved, the hurt you are experiencing will heal. Hold on so you can see the beautiful finish.
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Method 1 of 2: Waiting for a Positive Future
Step 1. Find a solution to your problem
You may not be able to solve all problems quickly, but you may be able to work on reducing the problem. If you're feeling tired from school, work, or family, consider taking a break to improve your life. If you are fragile, take time to deal with your emotions. Solving the problem will get you to the desired situation. You can't eliminate the problem, but at least the problem can be minimized.
- If your house is really a mess, pay a maid to tidy it up.
- Set a deadline for each task, and do each task in order.
- On the internet, there are many ways to solve problems.
Step 2. Pretend to be happy
The adage "fake it 'til you actually get it" can be applied to a variety of situations, even when you feel helpless. If you think your problem will get worse, don't be surprised if it does. Don't let yourself torture yourself with negative thoughts. Instead, try to imagine success and happiness, as if you were experiencing it right now. The more you believe that you can get through the problem, the better you will be able to deal with it.
- Hope that all your problems will be resolved well.
- Think positively. For example, think that you are not going to mess up a well-thought-out plan, or that the current situation will work in your favour.
Step 3. Make a plan for the life you want
Get out of the dark by making your own way out. Imagine yourself a few years from now, when your current situation becomes a memory. How is your work day going? Where do you live? What do you do? What entertainment do you get? Once you've envisioned yourself in the future, take steps to make it happen.
If you envision a career change, start looking for ways to make it happen. Go back to school, or get a new ability. There's nothing you can't do, and age isn't a barrier to starting over, if it leads you to happiness
Step 4. Add a piece of happiness to life
You don't need a lot of money or expensive things to be happy. Happiness can be found in the little things, for example when you stop walking and smell the roses. If you've recently moved and feel alienated from friends, schedule regular phone calls or video chats to stay in touch with the people you care about. When your spirits are low, find joy in the little things, like a discount at the convenience store, a delicious cake, or a sunny day. Smile when you find something fun.
- Remember things that make you happy, such as playing with children, playing sports, or volunteering. After that, try to do this. Play with pets, dance in your room, or sing your best in your room.
- You can also be happy by avoiding things that make you sad. For example, you can stay away from people who hurt you, cut your credit cards, learn to cook to avoid junk food, stop watching TV or reading the news, and so on.
Step 5. Stay connected with people you like and admire
Make friends with happy people who are naturally positive. If you feel sick, stay away from pessimistic or critical people. Make friends with people who laugh easily, smile often, and make you feel good.
- Spend time doing things that can strengthen relationships with those closest to you. If you've recently moved and feel alienated from your friends, find ways to stay connected with the people you care about. Instead of watching together, play a game together, or go to the mountains instead of the movies. Choose an activity that you can all remember together and enjoy.
- As explained in the previous step, keep in touch with those closest to you.
Step 6. Be an optimist
Positive thinking helps you live a happier life and keeps you from stress. Find the wisdom of every bad incident, and be grateful for every good thing in your life. You may be able to be critical when judging restaurants, manners, or movies, but don't let that attitude carry over into your everyday life.
- Do not let you think black and white, and assume your life is entirely bad or good. Remember that every event has a gray area, and very few things can be seen with black-and-white glasses. If you're always blaming yourself for losing your job or struggling with money, remember that there are many factors that can cause this to happen. Also remember that you are not a failure.
- If you're thinking negatively or critically, stop and decide if you want to change your perspective or think about something else. For example, when you're feeling irritated by bad weather, remember that plants need water, and that it doesn't rain every day.
Step 7. Rest
If you are really tired, rest. You can go where you like at the end of the week, or go hiking in the afternoon. If you have trouble finding time to rest, give your brain a break by reading a simple book.
Resting does not mean ignoring the problem. Find an activity you enjoy, and do it, like taking a shower, journaling, or listening to music
Step 8. Do therapy
The pressures of life can be too much to bear alone. A therapist can help you deal with crises efficiently, and see the other side of life, so that your life will be better.
- With therapy, you can explore yourself and grow.
- To find a suitable therapist, read online guides.
Method 2 of 2: Accepting the Current Situation
Step 1. Accept the current situation
Even if you don't like it, you can accept things that get out of control. For example, you can't make money from a tree or bring someone back to life that is dead, but you can learn to accept reality. While accepting reality can be quite difficult, accepting reality can help you relieve stress and live a calmer life.
- When life gets worse, take a breath and remember that you accept everything that happens in life, even if it doesn't feel like it to you.
- You can accept everything in life, both good and bad. For example, accept that you'll be late when you're stuck in traffic, bad grades, or a naughty child.
Step 2. Take control of the things you can control
Even though most things are out of your control, you can still have control over what is in your hands. If you feel lost in life, take a break. Know the things you can control, and have the intention to do them. Also, remember that while you can't control the situation, you can control how you react to it.
- Write down everything that is stressing you out, then figure out which issues you can control. For example, if you run out of groceries, you can go shopping or ask a friend to buy it.
- If someone knows your life inside and out, don't rely on them to make decisions. Your life is lived by you, and you are responsible for all the decisions in it.
Step 3. Remember that you don't have to suffer forever
Although heartache is an integral part of human life, you don't have to suffer. Suffering is a mindset formed by an inability to let go of the past, a tendency to accuse others, or a tendency to remember pain. You can't live without feeling pain, but you can reduce suffering.
- To reduce suffering, you don't have to ignore your feelings, but you have to change the way you think about your situation. Instead of considering yourself unlucky, say that you don't like the current situation, but that you can control and accept it, and don't feel sorry for yourself.
- Even if you're really hurt by the loss of a friend or a victim of a natural disaster, don't see yourself as a victim. Remember that tragedy can happen at any time at various stages in everyone's life, including yours.
Step 4. Use the grieving time to learn more about yourself
The good things in life don't reveal who you really are, and your true colors will emerge when bad things happen. Do you like the real you? Otherwise, you can remember what things you would like to improve in life.
- Remember how you deal with the environment and situations when bad things happen. Do you get angry more easily, or use bad things as an excuse? Or, are you trying to survive as best you can? Don't judge these actions, but think of them as a reflection of your life in difficult times.
- Pay attention to any aspect of yourself, good or bad, that comes up in difficult times.
Step 5. Develop caring
When you are having a hard time, you may focus on yourself and your needs. But when you care about other people, you will feel less lonely, you will feel happier, and you will feel less pressure. Even if you feel sad, treat the other person kindly and offer to help, even if you feel they don't deserve it.
- Remember that in this world, you are not the only one who needs help.
- Help others as much as you can, such as bringing groceries, cooking for those closest to you, or helping children with homework.
- If a child is making a fuss on the plane, take a deep breath and remember that the child's parents may feel frustrated or embarrassed. Instead of being upset, try offering to help the child's parents.
Step 6. Be grateful
Even if you're trying to get out of trouble, enjoy the process. It's easy to focus on what you don't have, but with gratitude, you can see the other side of a bad experience.
Be grateful each day for the little things, like a quick line at the convenience store, a dog walk, or a quiet disaster alarm. Every day, there is always something for which you can be grateful
Step 7. Laugh, be happy, and find a way to be happy or at least smile
For example, you could watch funny animal videos, hang out with positive and happy people, or go to comedy shows. Laughter calms your body, helps improve your mood, and is good for your brain too.
