People like to say the absence of someone makes the heart like it even more. But what if that person disappears from your life so often that your heart cools down? If you like someone and they don't reciprocate your feelings, it can be very difficult to get over them and this can put you in an endless cycle of hurt. Forgetting him isn't easy, but there are some useful methods to help you get over him and like someone better for you.
Step
Method 1 of 2: Keeping Away from Him
Step 1. Get away from him
One of the most effective ways to help you forget about him is to keep your distance. Try to minimize contact or potential contact with him so that you can forget him without reconnecting to make you sad or remind you of how you feel for him.
At first keeping the distance is difficult, but in the end it is necessary for the situation to be better and the process of forgetting it feels easier and faster
Step 2. Delete all contact information and text messages from your phone
One way to make sure you don't have contact with him is to delete him from your phone. Also try deleting text messages from it. Deleting this information can prevent you from contacting him again when you're weak, and it can help you forget about him.
- If you don't mind erasing all the information, try writing it down on a piece of paper you won't see every day and keeping this paper in a hidden place.
- Email them a copy of all text messages and keep these text messages in your inbox if you're not ready to completely delete them.
- Keep in mind that even if you've deleted his contact, chances are he hasn't deleted you. If he calls, you can either ignore him or respond with a short, polite answer.
Step 3. Unfriend him on social media sites
Most social media sites, such as Facebook and Instagram, allow other people to have greater access to your life, even people you don't want. By removing him from your social media, you can further limit contact with him.
If you're afraid of hurting the other person's feelings or making people wonder why you're no longer friends or following them on social media, look for ways to minimize what you see in this app. For example, on Facebook you can unfollow someone so you no longer see what they post on Facebook
Step 4. Stop talking about her and don't allow yourself to think about her
It's natural to talk about someone you like a lot and think about them all the time. However, this will only strengthen your feelings even more. Not consciously mentioning her name in conversation and actively organizing your mind not to think about her will help you forget her more quickly.
- It can be difficult for you not to mention him completely in a conversation, especially if you have friends in common. So try not to talk about him or ask how he's doing too often. You can also stay away from talking about him.
- If you need to talk about it to process your thoughts and feelings, feel free to do so but don't make it a habit.
Step 5. Ask your friends not to talk about him
If your friends know that you have feelings for him, they may sometimes talk about him. This will remind you of the him and prevent you from forgetting him. So ask your friends not to talk about it or update them if possible.
In the same group of friends, chances are you will face a situation when he is mentioned. So that you can forget about them more quickly, stay away from this group of friends until they discuss different topics
Step 6. Avoid places where he and his friends usually go
You and your partner may have a lot in common, including friends, class or work, or favorite places. Avoid situations where you could run into him.
- If you are in the same class or workplace, don't sit close to him. If he's sitting next to you, you can find ways to move or keep the interaction on a friend's level.
- If for example you like the same restaurant, look for new places to eat,
Step 7. Get rid of her traces
Getting rid of anything that might remind you of him will help you to forget him. Try erasing all traces of him on everything from your phone, social media to photos and other objects in your home.
- You can forget about it slowly or completely erase it from your life in a moment. You might emotionally find it easier to remove the traces little by little, or you could try removing them right away. Doing it directly will feel very difficult but can speed up the process of forgetting him.
- Delete the email or remove any letter, card, or gift from it. If you keep it, you will continue to hold on to your feelings for him.
- Delete the photos or photos of the two of you.
Step 8. Allow yourself to grieve and don't get angry
Forgetting him is a painful process and it is natural to grieve over a past relationship. But it's also important not to get angry with him in this process. You can't control your feelings for him and neither can he control your feelings for him.
- Realize that he was a special person in your life. Even if you don't have a romantic relationship, you still have a relationship with him. It's okay if you want to feel sad about this loss.
- Don't be angry with him. Maybe he doesn't know that you have feelings for him or that he's in a situation where he can't reciprocate your feelings. Don't be angry with him for something that is beyond his control.
- There are many reasons why you might have to forget about him, from he's dating another woman or getting married to your parents against him and even something as simple as he's too old for you. These are factors that you have no control over and therefore you cannot be angry with him.
- If you're really struggling with this process, you can try consulting for help dealing with your feelings.
Step 9. Know that you will find someone else
There are a lot of fish in the sea and he might not be the right person for him in the end. You will find others who are great for you. The sooner you can get over the person, the more open your heart will be to finding this person.
You can try to focus on their flaws to get over them and maybe find someone better for you
Method 2 of 2: Distracting Yourself
Step 1. Rely on your "support system"
You're likely in an emotionally unsettled situation trying to get over the person in your life, so this is a good time to rely on or maybe even reconnect with your family and friends. From talking about your feelings to diverting your mind by doing fun activities, your "support system" can help you forget him or her more quickly.
Friends and family can prevent you from sinking into grief. They can distract you by doing fun things with you that don't involve them
Step 2. Try to focus on yourself and your other interests
Try to concentrate on yourself as you try to forget him. This can make you realize that you don't really feel that deep for him.
- For example, start exercising or try a new fitness activity like yoga, which can also help your mind focus on something other than the person. Maybe you can also take a class that helps your career.
- Whatever you do, always make sure it makes you feel good.
Step 3. Try a new activity
This is also a good time to try new activities, which can distract you from your feelings. The more often you do something that distances you from him, the easier it will be for you to forget him.
For example, maybe you've always wanted to learn how to climb a rock. This new activity requires a lot of practice so you have less time to think about him
Step 4. Meet new people
Try to go out and meet new people who are not related to him as this can distract you from him and your feelings. Maybe you're having more fun with your new friends than you are with them.
There are lots of different ways to meet new people, including joining a running community or joining happy hours at a bar. Group activities are a great way to meet new people and take your mind off them
Step 5. You can try flirting or dating someone else
Maybe you're not ready to really commit to someone else, but flirting or casual dating with someone else can also help you get over them quickly. This will increase your confidence and take your mind off your feelings for him.
A little flirting that isn't too serious can be great for your confidence and remember that there are other people out there who can click with you. Remember to keep this flirting lighthearted and not serious
Tips
- Try not to be rude to him. If he is being polite by saying hello, you should also greet him nicely. But don't say more than that.
- Remember that you can cry if you feel sad. You will meet other people.
- Avoid the urge to be angry with him or treat him as an "enemy." He can't control who he will have feelings for, just like you. Therefore, you should never hurt another person on purpose.
- Try to be patient with yourself. Sometimes, we need time to forget someone. Do not be angry with yourself if this is indeed the situation we are in. Give yourself the time you need.
- Don't talk about what he likes because it can make you want him. So, don't talk about him so you don't like him even more.
- Realize that he is not as perfect as you believe. Try to find or remember what the disadvantages are and how these disadvantages can outweigh the advantages. If he has negative traits such as being impatient or disrespectful to you or other people who have more authority (especially your parents of the same gender), realize that this behavior will happen to you if you are in a relationship with him.
- Just think about everything he did that hurt you.
- Show him what he missed by not voting for you. This will distract you and make him a little jealous.
- Write a list of drawbacks.
- If he has siblings, you should avoid contact with them because they might talk about him.
- Realize that you like someone. It is very difficult for the brain and heart to be able to completely get rid of it. Try to let go of your attraction to him little by little and you will eventually reach your goal.
