Ignoring people you don't like is hard. Whether it's at school, at work, or in a circle of friends, there may be someone you don't get along with. You can ignore someone in polite ways, such as keeping your distance and ignoring their negative behavior. You must remain polite when ignoring someone. Being rude will make things worse. While ignoring someone may be an effective method, you may have to confront the person if he or she is interfering with your performance at school or work.
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Part 1 of 3: Dealing with Social Situations
Step 1. Stay away from the person
Avoiding is probably the best way to ignore someone. If someone annoys you, try to distance yourself from them.
- You can avoid places that the person usually goes to. If an annoying coworker always eats lunch at exactly 12 noon, try eating your lunch outside the office or after the person is done.
- Avoid social situations that force you to meet the person. If an annoying schoolmate is going to a party, don't go to the party and make other plans.
Step 2. Don't make eye contact
If you're in the room with someone you don't like, don't make eye contact with them. If you accidentally glance in his direction, this may result in eye contact. The person may misinterpret it and then come over and talk to you. When you're around the person, try not to look in their direction. This can reduce your chances of interacting with them.
Step 3. Communicate with him through other people
When you are working with this person, sometimes you have to communicate with them. It might be better if you communicate with him through someone else. You don't have to be rude in responding to this issue. For example, don't let the person hear you say something like, “Could you tell Jeff to put the dirty dishes in the sink? I don't want to talk to him directly. On the other hand, you can send information to him through other people discreetly if necessary.
For example, you are working on a project in groups. People you don't like are in the group. You can ask one of the group members to talk to him. You can also communicate with him via SMS or e-mail
Step 4. Reduce your response
You can't completely stop communicating with someone, especially if that person is a schoolmate or coworker. You certainly don't want to completely ignore what the person is saying. Therefore, reduce your response to it. When the person speaks, give them short responses such as "Hmmm" and "Yes." By doing this, he may understand that you need space.
Step 5. Ignore the negative behavior
If someone is very pessimistic or critical, try to ignore them. Ignoring the person will help you to be more positive.
- For example, if a coworker always complains about his job, try to ignore his complaints so you can still feel comfortable with your own job.
- You don't have to ignore everything he says or does. If a coworker is always making fun of you to the point of being very uncomfortable, talk to him or her about this in person. You can say, “Can you stop mocking my appearance? I like the way I look, but I'm really uncomfortable when other people criticize the way I look."
Step 6. Take advantage of the power of the group if necessary
If the annoying person is very aggressive towards you, ask a friend for help. Try inviting a friend or coworker to accompany you to a place that the person usually visits. For example, invite a friend to accompany you to class or lunch to keep the annoying person away.
Part 2 of 3: Maintaining Courtesy
Step 1. Be formal with the person
You still have to be polite even if you're ignoring the person. In fact, being rude will only make the situation worse. When you must speak to the person, do so formally.
Say, “Please,” “Excuse me,” and “Thank you.” Show him good basic manners while maintaining a rigid attitude. This will show the person that you don't see them as an enemy. You just don't want to interact with him too much
Step 2. Don't provoke the person
Ignoring doesn't mean being aggressive. Don't make fun of him, roll his eyes when he's talking, or overtly pretend you didn't hear him when he's talking to you. This will make you appear annoying, and is not the right way to deal with the person. Never provoke the person you are ignoring.
Step 3. Acknowledge its existence if necessary
You can't completely ignore someone, especially if they are a co-worker. If necessary, acknowledge the person's presence in a polite but not overly friendly manner. For example, wave or nod your head when you meet him in the hallway. Answer the question, "How are you?" from him with, “Fine. Thank you."
When talking to him, keep your words short and concise. This can prevent awkward or uncomfortable chats from happening
Step 4. Go away if necessary
Sometimes, he will not understand your intentions and goals. If the person is still annoying when you've tried to subtly show that you don't want to interact with them, it's okay to make excuses and walk away.
- For example, coworkers are overly critical of your personal life. Even if you give a bad response, he still does it.
- Say, "Okay, I appreciate your advice, but I don't need it and I have to go." Then, leave the person.
Part 3 of 3: Confronting Someone
Step 1. Defend yourself
Sometimes annoying people will cross the line so that you feel uncomfortable or threatened. Therefore, it's fine for you to defend yourself. Be firm and then deal with the problem.
- Calmly let him know that he's crossed the line. Explain that you cannot tolerate this behavior.
- For example, “Don't talk to me like that. I don't need unsolicited advice."
Step 2. Take note of the person's negative behavior at school or work
If you feel uncomfortable because of someone's annoying behavior at school or work, take notes on that person's behavior. Make sure that you have concrete information if you have to report to the authorities.
- Each time the person irritates you, record what he or she said, the witnesses, and the time and place it happened.
- If you are going to make a formal complaint, you will have a lot of concrete information about the person.
Step 3. Talk about the person's behavior calmly
If someone is constantly irritating you, it's okay to have a good talk with them about the situation. Wait for the right moment to talk about it and then convey calmly at that very moment that what he did was wrong.
- For example, "I know you don't mean to hurt me, but I don't like it when someone makes fun of my appearance."
- Tell him how you feel about his behavior. “You make me uncomfortable at work because people are paying more attention to my appearance.”
- Explain what he should do. For example, say, “I don't want you to make comments like that again. Understand?"
- Instead of criticizing the person, say what kind of behavior you cannot tolerate. This will prevent conflicts from occurring. Instead of saying, "You're so annoying," you should say, "I really need some quiet time to work."
Step 4. Ask the authorities for help
If the person's behavior doesn't improve after you talk to them in person, ask the authorities for help. If you are still in school, report the problem to your teacher or principal. If this incident occurs at work, report it to someone who works in the Human Resources Department. You have the right to feel comfortable at work or at school.
Tips
- Using a headset is a signal to others that you don't want to be spoken to.
- If you're trying to avoid eye contact with him at school but he's constantly acting annoying by doing something like drawing in a book or playing with your phone, don't respond to this behavior in a tantrum. The person is just looking for attention.
