Conveying your feelings to the person you like is not easy. It takes tremendous courage and of course a readiness to face rejection. Many people associate rejection with heartbreak, but the term "broken heart" is more appropriate for a relationship that is already established. Have you recently experienced rejection from a loved one? Do not worry. Treat the rejection in a positive way and move on with your life. Trust me, the right person will come at the right time. Prepare yourself to move forward to a better situation.
Step
Part 1 of 3: Keeping Positivity
Step 1. Avoid anger
It's normal to feel upset, heartbroken, or disappointed after a rejection. But believe me, anger will not improve the situation, especially if the person you like is a close friend of yours. Most likely, your friendship will be damaged after that.
Smile and wish the person the best. If you two are close enough, tell him that you still want to be good friends with him. Also convey that you hope your relationship will not change in the future. This is the best way to save face and keep the relationship post-rejection
Step 2. Spend time with friends
One of the best ways to get over the heartbreak of rejection is to hang out with friends. Do whatever activity you enjoy, like watching a movie at the cinema, having lunch together, or just having fun at home; most importantly, surround yourself with good friends when things get tough.
Let them know you're having a tough day, then ask if they'd like to spend some time with you. Some people will contact you directly without being asked, but some will not. If your friends are the second type, try calling and asking them to accompany you
Step 3. Do the things you love
Post-rejection pain or disappointment can be treated by doing fun things. What activities do you enjoy and can do for hours without getting bored? Listening to music? Read a book? Watching movies? Or just cycling in the afternoon? Either way, doing things you enjoy can help boost your mood and positivity after a heartbreak.
Step 4. Start writing a diary
Some people may find this method useless. But research shows that journaling can help shape one's perspective and maintain positivity after a broken heart.
- Buy a new, quality diary. Make sure your diary is striking, attractive, not easily damaged, and able to motivate you to fill it every day.
- Take time to fill out your diary each day. Try setting an alarm at a certain time frame and forcing yourself to keep writing as long as the alarm hasn't gone off.
- Allow yourself to experiment. Your diary is your personal consumption; no one else has the right to read it. Therefore, do not hesitate to open yourself honestly in the diary. Think of yourself as trying to analyze how you are feeling by writing everything down on paper. In other words, your writing doesn't need to be neat, structured, and has good grammar. Write down whatever you think, observe, or feel; no need to focus on structure and neatness.
Step 5. Know when to ask for help
Maybe you got rejected in front of a lot of people and feel very embarrassed about it. It's also possible that you have set your expectations too high, but those expectations are simply crushed. Whatever problem you're experiencing, don't hesitate to share it if it's impacting your daily life. If you feel like a friend or relative won't be able to understand your feelings, consider talking to a psychologist or professional counselor.
Most schools and universities offer free counseling services. If you are no longer in school or university, try searching the internet for a trusted psychologist in your area
Part 2 of 3: Moving On After Rejection
Step 1. Don't be afraid to face rejection
After being rejected, you are bound to feel hurt; it is reasonable. But most importantly, don't allow yourself to be a person who is afraid to face rejection in the future. This kind of fear is part of catastrophizing, which is a distortion of thinking that makes a person exaggerate the bad events they have experienced (believing one bad experience to be part of a larger and more serious pattern).
- Rejection is painful and unpleasant. But the situation has nothing to do with your life and death; one rejection won't make your world come to an end, right?
- There is no permanent rejection. New opportunities will always arise if you are willing to open yourself up.
Step 2. Separate yourself from the rejection
Many people take rejection personally; in their minds, the rejection occurs simply because they do not deserve to be accepted. Remember, that assumption is not true. You can like or dislike someone, but that feeling has nothing to do with how attractive or pleasing that person is, right? If you get rejected, chances are he doesn't see a match for you. Alternatively, he may not be ready for a romantic relationship with someone else. Whatever the reason, try not to take it personally.
Don't let someone's acceptance or rejection define you. Remember, you are an amazing person; nothing can change that fact
Step 3. View rejection as an opportunity
Loving someone who doesn't love you hurts. But remember, the rejection was only made by one person; one person which may not be for you. Change the way you think; learn to view rejection as an opportunity to find someone who loves you as much as you love them.
If your crush thinks you're not a good match, it's a sign that there are others out there who would definitely be a better match for you
Part 3 of 3: Looking for New People
Step 1. Identify your ideal type in choosing a partner
If your crush rejects you, it's likely because you've been focusing more on their physical appearance than on the person's personality. Whatever the reason for the refusal, now is the time to start being honest with yourself and determine what you really want from your partner.
Think about the personality traits a potential mate should have. Maybe you want someone who is warm and caring; maybe he should be trustworthy and dependable. Usually, people are also more easily attracted to people who have similar interests and outlook on life. Before you start looking for new people, first identify what you are really looking for in a potential partner
Step 2. Be aware of your emotional reactions
If you have an ideal type, you are more likely to actively seek out people with that type. But be aware that humans also have emotional reactions to everyone they meet. Sometimes, you ignore these emotional reactions because you have been blinded by physical appearances or attractive initial impressions. In fact, your emotional reaction to someone's presence can go a long way in helping you choose the right partner.
Emotional reactions are usually irreversible and occur unconsciously. Get into the habit of analyzing your emotions (perhaps by keeping a diary). By doing so, you will learn to recognize the emotional reactions that arise to the presence of other people
Step 3. Realistically evaluate your compatibility with your potential partner
Even if your crush has an ideal personality, your compatibility might not last long. Learn to evaluate your compatibility and your potential mate realistically; undoubtedly, you will be able to build meaningful relationships and avoid frustrating relationship problems.
- Think of a personality trait that you find attractive. Do you have a certain ideal type? Does this type usually really suit you? Or are you able to fall in love just by looking at someone's physique?
- Trust your instincts. If you meet someone attractive but they don't have much in common with you, they are likely a less potential candidate. Most likely, your instincts have told you so too. Learn to trust your instincts when evaluating potential mates. Trust me, this will go a long way in keeping you from the pain and rejection later on.
Tips
- Rejection is not the end of everything. One day you will find someone who truly loves you as much as you love them.
- Don't take rejection personally. Maybe the person is not ready to have a relationship with anyone; maybe you just don't fit. Most likely, the problem is not with you.
- Remember, you are not alone. Out there, millions of people experience the same kind of rejection every day.
- View rejection as an opportunity. Now you know that there's no point wasting time on someone who doesn't like you. Based on that experience, you'll be better equipped to open up to the right person.
- Be proud of your courage to share your feelings with him. Going forward, look for people who have one or two things in common with your crush. Who knows they might reciprocate your feelings, right?
Warning
- Don't make the person you like feel guilty. Guilt won't change his feelings for you anyway; It is feared that your relationship will only become more awkward or worse in the future.
- Remember, you can't dictate how other people feel. There's no point in getting upset if their feelings aren't directed at you; conditions are beyond their control.
- Consult a psychologist or counselor if you feel excessive grief after the rejection. Share your feelings with friends and relatives so they can provide the support and help you need.
