Maybe you have a hard time accepting yourself, life, and the reality you are going through. Maybe you don't like future prospects, or a side of your personality, or even how you look on certain days. It's natural to be self-critical at times, but know that there are a number of ways to learn to accept yourself and your life.
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Part 1 of 2: Cultivating Acceptance
Step 1. Acknowledge your strengths
It's easy to look in the mirror and find your own flaws. Don't count your shortcomings that you think should be improved, but count the good things about yourself right now. Make a list of your strengths, namely the things you are good at, the positive life values you apply, and the good friends you have.
If you're having trouble thinking about your strengths, ask a friend or family member to share their thoughts on the positive qualities in you
Step 2. Be honest with yourself
This is one of the hardest things for most people, but it is necessary if you want to take control of your life. In today's society that focuses on individual life, we are always driven to achieve success and therefore often seek recognition of that success from around us. We view criticism as negative, and hide from an honest view of ourselves, which may lead to a reaction to criticism.
To try to be honest with yourself, imagine that you are observing yourself from someone else's point of view. Ask yourself what you think about the "object of observation," and be as objective as possible based on the facts. Don't use your old opinion of yourself
Step 3. Admit your mistakes
Remember that you can't make repairs if you don't acknowledge the problem. You can think of your mistakes as opportunities to learn, which will lead you to your goals in life. Believe in yourself, realize that only you can change yourself, and only you can control your destiny. Determine the things that are most important to you and make up your mind about them. Get rid of all doubts and believe that you can achieve what you have dreamed of.
Once you realize that mistakes are opportunities to learn and that reality can't always be changed, you will be better able to endure challenges, persist, and grow into a more qualified person
Step 4. Talk to someone you trust
Share your feelings about life with a friend or family member who cares about you and is willing to give you the attention you need. You'll find that simply expressing your feelings openly makes you realize that they're just too much and that your life isn't really that bad at all.
If you don't want to talk, try asking your friend or family member for advice on ways to change or improve the things you don't accept in your life
Step 5. Seek professional help
Sometimes it's easier and more efficient if you get professional help. A therapist can help you learn to accept yourself and reality. This therapist may be a licensed psychologist, psychiatrist, counselor, or other mental health professional.
To find information about psychologists in your location, ask for references from the nearest doctors or hospitals
Part 2 of 2: Practicing Self-Awareness
Step 1. Learn the benefits of self-awareness
Applying self-awareness to the realities of life and the impact it has on you has been shown to be effective in helping humans cultivate self-acceptance. Some forms of self-awareness training, such as those involving self-compassion, require professional guidance, but other forms of training can be practiced at home. The following are some of the benefits of self-awareness and self-compassion:
- learn to be able to reduce self-criticism,
- learn to deal with problematic emotions,
- Learn to motivate yourself with encouragement, not by criticizing yourself.
Step 2. Take the time and set the alarm
Take 10-20 minutes to just be quiet and meditate every night or every morning. After you set the alarm, let your mind wander freely, without worrying that you will be late for work or other activities because the alarm sound will remind you later.
Make sure that your alarm goes off in a soft, pleasant sound so you can end your self-awareness meditation session in a smooth manner
Step 3. Sit up straight in a chair
Choose the most comfortable chair and sit in it. Maintain an upright posture and close your eyes to “seclude yourself” from things around you that can distract you.
It is also important to place the chair in the quietest corner of the house, so that you are not distracted by other things
Step 4. Observe your breathing
Pay attention to how you breathe while still breathing naturally, and don't change your way of breathing unless you feel you have to for increased comfort. Feel each inhalation and exhalation through your nose or mouth, entering your lungs and becoming energy throughout your body.
- Feel the previous breath rising in and out of your body, taking all your physical and mental tension and exhaling it into the open air.
- Try as much as possible not to slouch, but it's okay to let your body relax a little.
Step 5. Count your breaths
Remember your breath count to a count of four, then repeat the count. Don't think about anything other than your breath and your body.
If you're thinking about something else, just accept that your attention has been diverted, without judging yourself. Bring your mind back gently to focus on your breathing
Step 6. Stay consistent
Practice self-awareness meditation daily, and gradually you will see that you become more aware and able to accept yourself and your surroundings, as you get used to being silent without evaluating anything.
It takes frequent practice to master this technique, but don't give up! Also be aware that the process may take some time
Tips
- There are certain factors that are beyond your control. Don't try to control these factors. Just turn all your ideas into action, and do your best to achieve this goal.
- Don't blame others for your own choices.
- Look for old photos of you as a child. Realize how far you have grown since then and think about the goals you have achieved. You are an extraordinary person, so don't think of yourself as a nobody. Remember, everyone has a certain specific purpose in this life.
- When you feel down, try to do activities that will help you forget the bad things. This might be in the form of art, exercise or yoga, music, or anything else you want to do that can help you relax.
