It's time for you to accept the fact that your feelings are one-sided if your ideal man ignores you or doesn't call. Even if it hurts, try to forget about it because this behavior shows that he is not interested in you. Open your heart to other men because you can still choose and be in a relationship with a man who doesn't make you doubt his feelings!
Step
Part 1 of 3: Accepting the Truth
Step 1. Stop making excuses for the way he treats you
When a guy is attracted to you so much that he's ready and wants to be in a relationship, this will show in the way he treats you. Otherwise, he will ignore you, often shy away under various pretexts, or pretend to like you.
Maybe he just broke up and wants to get over his sadness or isn't ready to be in a relationship for some reason. You don't have to find out why he didn't call or help with the problem he was having
Step 2. Know the characteristics of a non-reciprocal relationship
If you need to keep reassuring yourself that he will come if you wait patiently, chances are that you are in a non-reciprocal relationship. There is an opinion that the relationship is more intimate if the couple sees each other less often, but his indifference makes you continue to chase him, while he comes and goes as you please.
- Be careful if you're the only one showing an interest in him, for example by asking how he's doing, taking him out for activities, or finding out his hobbies. Other clues, such as reminding yourself of your appointments, always considering what he wants before making plans, spending a lot of time on calls or on dates indicate that you are the one who initiated the relationship, rather than the mutual desire.
- If you often listen to sad songs or stare at your phone that won't ring, it sounds like your feelings are one sided.
Step 3. Don't pretend to be a different person
Changing yourself just to please someone can be bad for you. If a good friend or family member tells you that you seem different in order to be liked by men, take this seriously. You can't have a healthy relationship by changing into a different person. Plus, it's a lot more fun to be in a relationship with people who understand and admire you and accept you for who you are.
Step 4. Pay attention to the bad omens you've been ignoring
Usually, actions express things more clearly than words. Once you stop condoning his behavior and accept the fact that his behavior is unpleasant, you are free to build relationships with people who are worthy of love. Remember that you can find a guy who wants to spend a lot of time with you instead of waiting for a call from a guy who makes you hopeless.
- If you can't be sure of his feelings and keep asking questions about the status of your relationship, he likely isn't interested in you.
- If he says he has doubts about his feelings, stick with it! He doesn't feel what you feel. Remember, you have the right to be in a relationship with a man who gives you a place in his heart and life.
- If he suddenly calls over the weekend or wants to see you, but hasn't been in contact with you all week, don't misinterpret his behavior. You try to understand how he treats you because he's busy working or studying, but a guy who really likes you and wants to be in a relationship will try to contact or see you.
- If he often talks about his ex-girlfriend, it looks like he's still thinking about it and isn't ready to start a relationship with you.
Step 5. Be honest with yourself
The best way to deal with the disappointment of being rejected by the man of your dreams is to stop acting like you don't care about lying to yourself. Admit that you are disappointed that you misinterpreted his attitude.
- Consider whether or not you continue to approach him because he rejects you. We often want what we can't get.
- Remember that there are things you can't control. No matter how hard you try, you can't get someone to like/love you or change their behavior other than on their own.
Step 6. Acknowledge your feelings
Being attracted to someone is a real and normal thing that allows you to understand that falling in love is a natural and human behavior. Even if love is unrequited, acknowledging that you love someone is an important aspect of helping you recover.
- Share your experience with a close friend or counselor to work through your grief and prevent you from suppressing painful feelings.
- Give yourself a chance to think about how you feel, but limit it to just a few minutes a day so you don't continue to feel sorry for the situation and hurt yourself.
Step 7. Be kind to yourself
Think about the positive aspects of your personality, your strengths, and the activities you enjoy. Pamper yourself while enjoying relaxation at the spa. Take time to jog while enjoying the warm sun. Take time to chat with good friends.
- Say a spell. Prepare short, positive phrases to say to yourself when you're feeling down and need reassurance that all will be well, for example, "Keep your head up and open your heart."
- Take a few minutes a day to meditate in a quiet place. Take this experience as an opportunity to develop yourself. Remember that your feelings can change and the way you deal with loss makes you a more resilient person.
Step 8. Restore your life
Your self-confidence and self-worth are not determined by other people's perception of you. Remember that experiencing rejection doesn't mean you don't deserve to be in a healthy relationship with the right person. Don't let someone's attraction or rejection determine your self-worth.
Try to understand his feelings. A guy who rejects you has no intention of hurting you, unless he's a sociopath. Have you ever disappointed a guy because you weren't attracted to him? Remember that you can do the same thing by rejecting a man who loves you
Part 2 of 3: Letting Go of Empty Hope
Step 1. Set realistic expectations
Now that you're clear about your situation and realizing that your feelings aren't reciprocated, it's time to determine what you need to do to deal with this reality. Hoping that today you can date him again, continue a relationship, or become his idol only ensnares you in a vortex of prolonged sadness and disappointment.
- Focus your mind on priority activities, such as having lunch with a good friend, getting to class on time, or jogging while enjoying the beauty of nature.
- Think positive things every morning when you wake up. Don't rely on other people to make you happy because you can't control other people's feelings, actions, and attitudes. You will feel calm if you are pinning your hopes on something that you can make happen on your own.
- Be prepared for various possibilities. For example, if he didn't call you in the past few days, don't worry about worrying about him calling you today. Free yourself from expectations so that you avoid feeling disappointed if your dreams don't come true.
Step 2. Don't fantasize about ideals
In general, children learn to fantasize by making up romantic stories to make relationships more meaningful and more beautiful when this is not the case. When you feel that you have found the ideal partner who is destined to be a life partner, it will be difficult for you to give up hope that one day, he will accept you as the woman he loves.
- Take off the pink monocle. Make a list by noting the advantages and disadvantages of the ideal man. In reality, no person or relationship is perfect. Imagining something ideal is an unhealthy mindset because it makes you set a standard of living like in a fairy tale that is impossible for humans to achieve.
- Give up useless beliefs and rituals, such as getting out of bed on a certain side when you wake up in the morning to get him to call you. Realize that these actions do not affect his actions.
Step 3. Set aside time to grieve
Get over the sadness once you can't deny that he rejects you as his girlfriend. Don't beat yourself up if this experience has left you feeling embarrassed and devastated for expressing unrequited feelings. Remember, as human beings, it is natural for us to have feelings, hopes, and want to be loved. Forgive yourself because you didn't mean to hurt yourself.
- Take time to soak in a warm bath or treat your nails at the salon.
- Share your experiences with friends and family members so you can feel relieved. Many people have experienced the same thing.
- Invite friends to watch your favorite movie at the cinema.
Step 4. Act like nothing
You may have a hard time hiding your feelings when you meet him, especially if you are both coworkers or schoolmates. Instead of dwelling on it and feeling uncomfortable, focus on the lesson or help a friend with an assignment.
- Make plans to go somewhere after class or work so you don't get confused about having to make small talk when you meet him.
- Be nice if you need to talk to him.
Step 5. Delete the mobile number and the account
To avoid being tempted to call or text him, remove his cell phone number from your contact list. Unfriend him on social media so you don't open his account and get your heart broken again by seeing his picture with another girl.
Don't forget to delete voice and text recordings so you don't reread messages from them or hear them again
Step 6. Make a schedule of activities
Start doing new activities and enjoy life. This is a good time to take a painting course that has been delayed or visit a tourist location.
Busy yourself with plans to meet friends so you can work through rejection and sadness. Establish a daily routine and set aside time to hang out with friends or family members for support
Part 3 of 3: Going Again
Step 1. Reflect
Loving someone and being rejected is a painful experience. Set aside enough time to recuperate while reflecting on the things you learned about yourself. By doing some introspection and self-evaluation, you can understand what's going on and find patterns that have been influencing your relationship.
Accept the disappointment of experiencing this event and take the time to work through the sadness
Step 2. Open your heart to others
By getting to know other men, you may realize that the guy who broke your heart is not suitable to be your boyfriend. There are still many men you don't know yet so you can still choose the right partner!
Before starting another relationship, tell yourself, "I'm not looking for a boyfriend. I'm not dreaming of being the girl of my dreams. I accept myself as I am. I don't need anyone else to be happy."
Step 3. Free yourself from heartache
As a perfect woman, you are the most important person in your life. Do the things that make your life worth being proud of, instead of relying on a man to make you feel worthy and able to respect yourself. Be a person who loves yourself and is happy before loving someone else!
- Make sure your feelings are healed before opening your heart to someone else. It's best if you don't date for a while.
- Restore self-respect. This experience may make you feel worthless. Do activities that make you feel confident, such as playing games with friends or painting.
- Set aside time to do fun and happy things. Don't forget to take time to enjoy solitude.
- Be patient during recovery. Overcoming feelings of sadness and disappointment due to unrequited love takes a lot of time.
Step 4. Learn how to build healthy relationships
When you're in a new relationship, make sure you don't carry the emotional baggage of a bitter experience. So that you can start your relationship with a positive attitude, observe what a healthy relationship looks like, such as that of a mother and father or a best friend with her boyfriend. Ask for advice and information from people who always get along and are happy with their partners.
- Read online articles or inspirational books in the library about how to build healthy relationships.
- Find out the characteristics of a healthy relationship by reading the wikiHow article or accessing:
Tips
- Dont think to much. Forget the bitter experience and continue life as usual. There are many other men who are willing to open their hearts to you!
- Use this experience as an opportunity to learn and grow once you are able to love yourself.
- Remember, you don't have to give time to a guy who makes you sad and disappointed.
Warning
- Don't spread stories about your loss or wear a mourning crest on your sleeve as if it were a badge of honor.
- Don't get drunk and don't call him.
- Don't hold grudges or sabotage when he's in a relationship with another girl.
