Finding it difficult to find things to talk to your boyfriend? Once you get to know someone well, it can be difficult to find new topics to talk about. But this is of course not impossible! Follow these steps to keep your conversations fresh and interesting, whether in live chats, chat apps, or via other text messages.
Step
Step 1. Ask him about topics he finds interesting
In general, people will be more comfortable talking about him and the things that interest him. This is because these things are something he is very well aware of and master. Here are some things you can try asking:
- What happened to him that day
- His past experiences (such as where he lived as a child, what he liked, important people in his family)
- Hobby
- His favorite activity
- His favorite book, movie, or music.
Step 2. Keep up to date with the information
If you have time to watch or read the news, you will have more topics to talk about. Keep up to date with current events, funny videos or shows, or stories on the internet that are widely talked about. When the conversation stops, ask your boyfriend if he's read or seen the latest news. If he's seen it, you can talk about your opinion. But if he hasn't seen it, you can actually tell your girlfriend the news/video/event.
Step 3. Guess both
For example, do you prefer blind or deaf? Would you rather just eat spinach or listen to carols for 8 hours straight for a lifetime? Try imagining something interesting, funny, or even complicated, and ask your boyfriend what he thinks. When he answers, ask why.
- Pretend to be against it. Give rebuttal to whatever reason your boyfriend gives, so he will rethink his choice. Explain that you're just trying to make the conversation more exciting, not against his point of view all the time.
- Some other examples of conditional questions are "What keeps you from sleeping at night?", "If you could start your life all over again, what would you change?", and "What would mean the most to you?" (or "If you could choose only 10 things to own, what would you choose?").
Step 4. Ask something you don't know
This could be something about himself, or some other fact you don't know. Either way, you're sure to learn something from it. If you want something even more specific, ask your boyfriend to share one of his hobbies.
Nostalgia is an interesting topic to talk about. Ask him about the first thing he remembers, his first day at school, his first toy, and the first birthday he can remember. This conversation will let you know what matters to him, and get to know what your girlfriend was like when she was a child
Step 5. Ask about something random or weird
This question can get you to talk about something fun when you're in a good mood. Questions like "Do you believe Santa Claus exists?" or "If you had to choose between TV or the internet, which would you choose?" or "If there wasn't a clock to tell the time, what do you think life would be like?". Talk about these random things casually, because there are no wrong answers to questions like this.
Tell a fairly funny joke and laugh with him (if he has a good sense of humor)
Step 6. Give frequent compliments
Tell him how and why you like certain dating activities with him. For example, you could say "I love it when you take me out to dinner. The restaurant is so pretty and makes me feel special."
Step 7. Talk about the future
Talk about things you want to do someday, for example, you want to go to Paris, star in a certain show, write a novel or stay a while on a boat. Ask him what his dream is. Here are some topics you can talk about:
- Where do you want to continue your studies?
- What major do you want to take?
- Where do you want to live?
- Where do you want to travel?
- What hobby do you want to pursue?
- What job do you want?
Step 8. Play a game
You can play snakes and ladders, online games, or video games, whichever you choose. If you're competing against each other, you can tease each other a bit and try to outdo each other. If you play as a team, you can talk about game strategy together. Try these classic games:
- Chess
- Checkers
- Scrabble
- Snakes and ladders
- Monopoly
- Card
Step 9. Listen actively
The art of talking to other people involves listening, so that the other person wants to talk more. Show your boyfriend that you're genuinely interested in what he's talking about by responding to what he's saying. Use sentences and body language to show that you agree with what he's saying when he's talking, and repeat the explanation in outline so he knows you're really listening.
- If your relationship is new and you're having a hard time talking things over, try chatting for less than an hour first. Talking too much or too long can make a new relationship feel boring.
- Show that you really enjoy being with him. A casual conversation can instantly revive silence.
Tips
- Be yourself and don't pretend. Trying to look perfect in front of him will make you feel even more tense. Remember that he chose you for who you are. Just tell me honestly what you think.
- Don't say that you don't deserve him or that he's too good for you, instead just say that you really appreciate him.
- When making jokes about him, make sure he understands you're joking so he doesn't feel embarrassed. Because if he doesn't, his impression of you will be bad and the conversation will stop.
- Just relax! Sia is your girlfriend. Even though the two of you may not have anything to talk about, the silence will soon dissipate between the two of you. You should be able to talk about anything with your boyfriend.
- Flirt with your boyfriend. Many men feel deprived of pleasure from the chasing phase of women, after starting a relationship. Bring this fun back with a seductive attitude to him.
- If the conversation gets awkward and you're running out of things to talk about, just play a game of "Truth or Dare," which can make for a lot of fun.
- Sometimes a man will prefer to feel "honored" than loved. Be careful not to belittle his ego as a man by criticizing what he does or says. Just a word or two or even the tone of your voice can make a big difference!
- There's no need to be ashamed of your boyfriend. However, just tell him if you are shy or quiet. If he loves you, he will understand.
- Hold her hand while speaking. This will reduce the feeling of awkwardness for some people.
- Sometimes when you run out of topics, you don't have to say anything and just give him a sweet kiss.
Warning
- Don't lie just to create conversation.
- Forget your ex-girlfriend! Listening to you talk about your ex will make your boyfriend feel uncomfortable, especially if you are boasting or bad-mouthing your ex. Your boyfriend will think about how he stands in your mind, and won't like the comparisons you make.
- Don't say "I love you" just to create conversation. He will feel uncomfortable if you use that sentence to fill the silence of the conversation, and so will you.
- Avoid complaining when chatting with your boyfriend. No one can stand to hear constant complaints for a long period of time. If this becomes a habit, it will make you seem less confident and like you need to put other people down just to talk about something.
- Topics you should avoid when your relationship is new are: marriage, children, expensive gifts and dislike of his family. Be careful in conversations that involve the two of you in the future "as a couple," until you're absolutely sure that you two are meant to be.
- Don't gossip about your own friends, as this will make you look bad yourself.
Related article
- Starting a Conversation When You Have Nothing To Talk
- Fun‐Happy with Boyfriends (for BoysBoys)
- Make Your Girlfriend Feel Special
- Being Romantic to Your Boyfriend (article for women)
- Talking to a Woman (article for men)
