drinker. Party man. Use of illegal drugs. Cheaters. You know: the guys you keep dating. Want to break that circle? With a set of personality and relationship standards, as well as a few simple adjustments to behavior and a true treasure map to the best men, wikiHow can help you find the right man. Get started with Step 1 below!
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Part 1 of 4: Look in the Right Place
Step 1. Find him, don't wait for him
The most important part of finding the right guy is that you shouldn't sit around waiting for him to find you. You have to go out and find it. Even Cinderella has to go to the dance, right?
Step 2. Frequently go to coffee shops and lunch spots in the right places
Find out what kind of guy you're looking for (doctor-to-be, successful entrepreneur, outdoor adventurer, artist, etc.) and go for lunch or morning coffee in an environment where such men are concentrated. Of course, this means you have to be willing to talk to a guy you don't know!
Step 3. Join a club or take a class
Local clubs and classes can be great places to meet men. Choose a class or club in a field that interests you, but know that it will be easier if you choose something that has a higher concentration of men. Classes in business, investing, and other job skills often attract more men. As for clubs, check with your local university or community center for sports clubs, game clubs, or male-centered activities.
Step 4. Search through online media
It's not for lonely people anymore: many people already meet their potential mate online. There are free services (like Plenty of Fish) as well as online communities where you can meet someone who fits or you can pay a small fee to join a reputable service like Match.com.
Step 5. Go to a convention or conference
Whether it's a local comics convention or a business conference, chances are you'll find plenty of single men. But do your research before you go, so you have something to talk about.
Maybe you think you don't want a nerdy guy, but you'd be wrong. The nerdy man loves earnestly and is loyal, and tends to be very stable. Give them a chance
Step 6. Ask your friends for help
The best way to find a good guy is to ask your friends to match you. Don't feel embarrassed or feel like you've failed: most couples meet through good friends and good friends want to see their loved ones happy! They wouldn't mind…in fact, they might even enjoy the feeling that comes from helping people find happiness. Just tell your friends that you're tired of dating useless guys and ask if they know someone who would make a good husband-to-be. This method can lead you to discover great men who, without the help of that friend, would have been overlooked or overlooked.
If your friends aren't pointing you towards a good guy, you need new friends. Good people get along with good people, and your friends clearly have character flaws or don't value friendship enough if they give you total losers to date
Step 7. Try your workplace
Did you know that more than 20% of married couples see each other at work? If you haven't looked around the office, give it a try. Meeting someone at work can help you answer some very important questions about potential partners: someone who works hard and is kind to their coworkers is usually a great potential date.
Part 2 of 4: Setting the Standard
Step 1. See the priority
You want the right husband-to-be to have priorities in the right order. He should prioritize your happiness over what his friends, coworkers, or family think of him. If he's worried that you're making him less manly or cool, he's not the right guy. He should also have the same priorities as you in things like work, finances, lifelong education, self-improvement, etc.
- Everyone's priorities in life are different, so it's hard to say which ones he should and shouldn't have. What matters is that his priorities are the same as yours.
- Remember: you shouldn't expect more from him than you expect from yourself.
Step 2. Pay attention to the way he talks to and about you
When he introduces you to other people, does he try to avoid calling you his girlfriend? This is a bad sign. You should also pay attention to the way he talks to you. Is he insulting or does he make you feel bad? The right guy doesn't say hurtful things to you on purpose.
Sometimes your guy might try and point out some of your weaknesses. This can be good or bad, depending on how he does it. If he's really worried about you and wants to help you improve, he'll never pressure you or give you an ultimatum. Instead, he will consider your feelings on the topic and if you want to change, he will help you find the best way to do it
Step 3. Make sure the level of maturity and stability suits you
Most things like life priorities differ depending on the person, the level of maturity can also be different. Find what works for you and stick to it. If you like someone who is carefree and cheerful, that's fine. But if you need someone who can grow with you, then you deserve it. Don't assume "boys are always boys". If you feel like you have to take care of him all the time then the relationship is not going to work out in the long run.
Step 4. Be free when you are with him
When you're with the right guy you have to feel free. You should feel free to try new things and explore the world around you. The world should feel full of possibilities. He should push you, not hold you back. If he scares you or tells you what you can and can't do, he's not the right guy.
Step 5. Expect him to be honest, especially with you
Trust is one of the most important things in a relationship, regardless of what kind of person you are. Therefore, he should always be honest with you and with the other people in his life. He has to live honestly so you don't have to doubt your life with him.
Step 6. Demand a loyal man
Once someone betrays you, trust can never be regained. There will always be the possibility of him betraying you again. It's not something you want. It makes a truly happy relationship nearly impossible. Once a guy cheats on you, it's a clear sign that you deserve better and that you should leave the relationship.
If he truly loves and appreciates you, he will try to talk to you about whether he is having a hard time in the relationship. Don't believe her excuses when she says something like, "We used to have a problem but now I want to fix it."
Part 3 of 4: Presenting Yourself
Step 1. Respect him and everyone else
When you're trying to lure the right guy, you want to show him that you're the woman who will soon be the right wife. One of the best ways to do this is to show that you are a good person. Show respect for him and, most importantly, show respect for others. We can tell a lot about a person by the way they treat others and if you're nice to people you don't have to be nice to, that's a good sign.
Step 2. Respect yourself
The right guy wants someone who thinks he's worth loving and respecting, so show that you're worthy by respecting yourself. Don't talk lightly about yourself, speak nice about yourself in interpersonal situations, wear clothes that are not condescending (too big, too small, too revealing, etc.), and practice good personal hygiene, a healthy diet, and reasonable exercise habits.
Step 3. Be yourself
The right guy isn't the right guy if he doesn't fall in love with who you are as a person. Whatever happens, being yourself is the most important thing. If a guy doesn't like you for who you are, he doesn't deserve you. Let your true passions shine, celebrate all the positives about yourself and accept your failures as a person. Never try to be someone you are not, because that is unhealthy for yourself and the relationship.
Step 4. Pursue your passions
Passionate and enthusiastic people are attractive to almost everyone, so get involved in pursuing your passions. Do the things you've always wanted to do and go out to try the things you've always wanted to do. The right man will think that passion is sexy.
Step 5. Communicate clearly and frequently
Men find that communication is definitely one of the most important skills in a relationship, so show that you're a safe bet by communicating clearly and often. It's also important because it allows you to work things out in your relationship before they get too big to fix, making the relationship more stable and enjoyable for both of you.
Step 6. Stop messing around
You know the game: you flirt with him, make him think you're attractive, and then act cold or indifferent afterward. You are carefully measuring when to contact him and how much time he can spend with you to make him want more. This is highly manipulative behavior and will not give you the kind of guy you are looking for. Be honest with him and let him know that you care. He would have done the same if he was a really nice guy.
Step 7. Take the initiative
Don't be afraid to take the initiative in finding and dating the right guy. Choose where you will date every few times. Don't be afraid to tell how you feel. He'll be able to see that you think the relationship is more important than your shyness.
Part 4 of 4: Getting Additional Help
Step 1. Get help to help him love you
Once you fall in love with him, you want to make sure he loves you just as much, right? It's not as difficult as it looks.
Step 2. Learn how to attract good guys
Sometimes it feels like you're attracting bad guys like flies, while nice guys just don't seem to notice. It may have something to do with the way you behave! Make a few changes and you'll be attracting the right guy before you know it.
Step 3. Get the right guy to notice you
Sometimes getting his attention is the real trick. You can come out of the shadows and be treated better if you try a few simple tricks and stick to them.
Step 4. Learn how to win him over
If you want to have a permanent place in his heart, you have to work hard enough. Sometimes, you just have to have the perfect show of affection to make him realize that you're the right woman.
Tips
- Don't panic if a guy you like doesn't like you back. Maybe you weren't meant to be together.
- If he doesn't like you, don't push and push and push to try to get him to like you; it will make things worse and you will end up wasting precious time finding the right guy or getting the totally right guy to find you.
