Being selfless means putting the needs of your community above your own and always acting on your own behalf. Acting selflessly is not easy, but the more you do it, the more kind and generous you will become. If you get into the habit of doing things to help others feel good and make this world a better place to live, you'll see that selflessness can actually make you happier.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Develop a Selfless Mindset
Step 1. Broaden your horizons
Being selfless must start with being able to see beyond your own personal affairs and try to cultivate empathy for others, even those you've never met. If you are constantly concerned only with your own problems and status, you will not have the time or energy to act selflessly. The first step in being able to act selflessly is to develop a greater awareness of the life around you. You can broaden your horizons by doing the following ways:
- Listen when the other person is talking. Listen carefully, don't let your mind wander while someone is talking about a problem, or telling you a fun story. Allow yourself to be completely immersed in the lives of others in return.
- Read, watch, or listen to the news. By doing these things you will be more aware of what major events are happening in the world and in your own city.
- Read novels. Research shows that reading fiction can improve your ability to empathize.
- Select a few questions to study further. Pay attention to what is going on around you. What are the important issues affecting your community? For example, maybe the river in your city is heavily polluted and causes people to get sick. Choose a topic you want to learn more about, then read as much as you can so you can understand it more deeply.
Step 2. Try to understand the other person's feelings
Empathy and selflessness are always intertwined. If you can understand how someone is feeling, you'll be better able to act selflessly toward that person. You can also have empathy for people you've never met.
Try to imagine yourself in a situation that is being faced by someone else. If you faced the problem yourself, how would you feel? How would you like to be treated?
Step 3. Be selfless even if no one knows about it
Unselfish people do kindness and generosity without expecting credit for what they have done. They do it because it's a nice thing to do, and because it feels good to be able to help someone else if you can. Making anonymous donations is a good way to be generous without expecting anything in return.
Step 4. Take pleasure in the happiness of others
Have you ever experienced the immense joy of being able to make someone else happy? There are those who doubt whether it is possible for them to be truly selfless, because this act can actually bring immense happiness. Instead of just being busy questioning whether selflessness, in fact, is actually putting yourself first, enjoy the feeling of happiness that comes from being able to help others. If you take pleasure in other people's happiness, you will be able to find other ways to be selfless.
Step 5. Make someone who is unselfish a model for you
It's always nice to be selfless. Putting the needs of others before your own is usually beneficial, but it is very difficult to put the interests of others first when you have to take care of your own. So it's helpful to have someone who is selfless that you can model for.
- Find someone you can describe as "selfless" - someone you know, a famous person, a religious figure - or anyone who is used to doing things for the good of others. What actions have they done so unselfishly? What are the consequences of this action?
- If you're still struggling with the choice to be selfless, ask yourself what this person would do, and try to find strength in your answer.
Method 2 of 3: Making Unselfish Choices
Step 1. Don't hurt others for your own sake
While it doesn't seem like a big deal if you take the biggest piece of cake and don't want to share it with your sister, or make a very influential decision by making plans to get the attention of your best friend's lover, never hurt someone else's feelings in order to make ends meet. your wish. This action will not be good for you. Try to make unselfish choices, even if these are the most difficult choices.
Resist the temptation to lie, steal, or cover up bad things that have been done, even if you are sure that you will not be caught
Step 2. Don't value your time more than anyone else's
Are you the type of person who can't wait to stand in line at the post office or grocery store? When you start to get annoyed, remember that everyone in the room has a life that is just as valuable as yours. If you keep this in mind, you can act as selfless when impatience is preventing you from becoming a better person.
Don't burden others with your problems. If you had a bad day, it doesn't mean you have the right to make other people suffer because of it
Step 3. Make choices that can help more people
If you always put the wants of your friends or your own family ahead of the needs of the larger community, this means that you are not completely selfless. How can you fulfill the wishes of as many people as possible if you only help those closest to you? Be an example to others around you and make the best choices for everyone.
Step 4. Forgive and forget
If someone wronged you and apologized, do your best and don't hold a grudge. The way to be selfless is to look at a situation from the other person's point of view, and realize that it is always better to cultivate peace, love and forgiveness than to hold on to resentment and hatred. It can be very difficult to forgive someone who has wronged you, but this is the beauty of selflessness.
Method 3 of 3: Doing Unselfish Deeds
Step 1. Volunteer to share your time and expertise
This is an excellent way in which you can practice selflessness. When you volunteer your time and expertise, the reward you get is a feeling of worth because you've been involved in helping your community. Research has shown that volunteering can actually increase happiness and provide longevity. There are countless ways to volunteer, so decide what you want and plan ways you can contribute.
- Homeless shelters, soup kitchens, and other non-profit organizations that work to help those in need are always in need of volunteers.
- If you have a specific skill that you would like to use, look for job opportunities within an organization that can benefit from your help. For example, if you are a teacher with a particular specialty, you can teach writing and reading classes at your local library.
- Sites like volunteermatch.com provide information about opportunities to join various communities.
Step 2. Donate what you can
Making donations of money and goods is another way of doing selfless deeds that you should practice as often as you can. But this does not mean that you have to donate beyond your means. Make a budget and determine how much you can give, then make a commitment to donate that amount, even if it means making more sacrifices.
- Choose a few charities to which you want to donate a certain amount on a regular basis.
- Giving donations to those who ask for it in return is a selfless good deed that you can do every day.
- Donating food, clothing, and other items to shelters for the homeless, disaster relief organizations, animal shelters, and so on is another good way to give.
Step 3. Always ready to help your friends and family
There are times when we want to turn off our cell phones and withdraw from the daily grind. However, doing this too often will make you not always ready to help your friends and family when they need your help. Find a way that you can always be ready to respond and help those close to you when they need it.
Step 4. Be selfless in daily activities
Give your seat on the train to older people and pregnant women. Help hold the door for people who will pass after you. Pay the bill if you see the person sitting at the next table running out of money. It's impossible to be completely unselfish all the time - you can't pay for everyone's meals or give your shirt to everyone who needs it - but try to find meaningful ways to become selfless in your everyday life. day.
Step 5. Take time to pay attention to yourself
Being unselfish can take an emotional toll if you don't take the time to restore your energy. If you notice that you're always fulfilling other people's wishes and saying "yes" when you could actually take a break, you need to step back and take care of yourself for a moment. If you are not physically and emotionally healthy, you will not be strong enough to "help" others, so make sure that you always take good care of yourself.
