Many people are very sensitive to other people's emotions. You may also be like this - being able to empathize with others, sometimes to the point that your feelings as a sensitive person are very disturbed. Setting firm boundaries while remaining friendly can help you learn to prioritize your own feelings. Then you can develop emotional, social, and physical spaces for yourself, so that you can thrive without being negatively influenced by other people's emotions.
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Method 1 of 4: Understanding Your Response to Other People's Emotions
Step 1. Do some reflection to see if you are a very sensitive person
Highly sensitive people (HSP) are easily excited and emotional. Some of the characteristics of HSPs are:
- Sensory detail: You appreciate details that are noticed by the five senses - such as soft felt fabrics, strong colors, beautiful sounds, etc.
- Implicit meanings: You understand hidden meanings and don't rush into decisions.
- Emotional awareness: You enjoy taking care of your emotional health, and have the potential to take better care of yourself because of the awareness of this importance.
- Creativity: You may be very creative even if you are an introvert.
- Great empathy: You are very sensitive to other people's emotions.
Step 2. Determine if you are an empath
Empath is someone who is very sensitive to other people's emotions in general, much deeper than most people. All empaths belong to the HSP group, but not all HSPs are empaths. Here are signs that indicate you may be an empath:
- You feel other people's fears, anxieties, and stress. You absorb these feelings into your body and deal with them as if they were your own physical symptoms and ailments. You are not only influenced by friends, family members, or colleagues, but also by people you don't know or don't like.
- You quickly feel tired, tired, and unhappy when you are in a crowd of people.
- Excessive sounds, smells, and talk can make you stressed and nervous.
- You should take some time alone to recharge.
- You find it more difficult to make sense of your feelings. You get hurt easily.
- Your nature is giving, generous, spiritual, and can be a good listener.
- You tend to make sure you have a way out so you can get away quickly, for example by driving your own car to various events, etc.
- The intimacy of close relationships can feel like something that makes you cramp or lose yourself.
Step 3. Identify to find out when you feel most vulnerable to absorb other people's emotions
Not everyone will be affected by their fellow human beings to some degree, or even in similar ways. However, everyone has times when their emotions are influenced by others around them. Try to learn which types of situations happen to you the most.
Pay attention to how you feel when you are around other people. Also study the most common emotions. Are your emotions influenced by the person you want to draw attention to? Or someone intimidating you? Do you feel tired when you are in a crowd?
Step 4. Identify the people who annoy you
People who are usually difficult for emotional empaths to accept include critics, victims, narcissists, and controllers. These people are usually referred to as "emotional vampires."
- Do an analysis of the people around you. Do they like to criticize? Are they trying to manipulate you? Do they keep talking about themselves? Have they ever asked how you are?
- Once you know how to detect these behaviors, you can protect yourself. You can do this by walking away from these people and saying to yourself, "I appreciate who they are, even if I don't like their attitude."
Method 2 of 4: Setting Boundaries on Others
Step 1. Determine your own needs and values
Find out what you really need and what you can't compromise on. All of these things are priorities that you value most and are non-negotiable, such as health, children, and other things. Once you've decided on the things you absolutely need to live in peace, you can start setting boundaries in life.
You should also determine when you need to be flexible. What can you compromise, reduce, or give up?
Step 2. Express your needs to your loved ones
When you need a little space to process your feelings and calm down, share it with the people you care about. Communicating your needs will help people (such as your partner) understand why you're trying to keep your distance. If he understands your motivations, your relationship can grow stronger, and you get the personal space it needs.
Step 3. Plan responses to difficult situations
When faced with complex situations, you may be too flexible in changing boundaries. If you plan your response ahead of time, you'll be able to better maintain these boundaries.
- For example, how would you respond when a friend complains about his job? You can say, "I'd be happy to listen to your work situation, but I only have 10 minutes." Then, stick to the 10 minute duration.
- Another example, you have a coworker who always puts off work until the last minute, and you have to sort it out so he doesn't get stressed. You can set boundaries by saying, “I have to finish my own work right now. Sorry, I can't help you."
Step 4. Set time limits
Knowing how much you can endure and sticking to those limits are vital to maintaining mental health. Set friendly but important boundaries for emotionally draining people.
For example, don't stand still and listen to someone talk for two hours when you can only do it for 30 minutes. Find an excuse and leave the person
Method 3 of 4: Creating Space for Yourself
Step 1. Learn to rely on yourself
Get to know your emotions, feelings, wants, and needs. Set firm boundaries on other people so you can get what you need to feel happy and full. If you continue to rely on other people to determine your feelings or actions, you are more likely to adopt their emotions and reactions. Instead of going this way, prioritize your own needs and wants by learning to live independently.
- Don't wait for someone else's permission to act. You can make your own decisions without having to ask anyone else's approval. Start small. Don't ask someone if a piece of clothing looks good on you before you buy it. Just buy it if you like it. Take bigger decisions step by step, without other people's input. In this way, your self-confidence will develop, as well as creating a personal space for feelings and needs to feel full.
- Make sure you don't have to rely on other people to leave a difficult situation. Drive your own car or prepare a way to get home easily when needed. Prepare enough money so that you can carry out alternative plans if you start to feel pressured.
Step 2. Create a personal space in your home environment when you live with other people
Ask them to value personal time so you can re-energize. Prepare a place to remove yourself from certain situations or when you feel uncomfortable, such as tired. This is especially important to prevent you from absorbing the other person's feelings too deeply., Find an area that makes you feel peaceful and calm.
Bring pictures of waterfalls or dense forests and have a look when you feel too tired
Step 3. Give yourself physical space when in public
Physical space can be useful for easing emotions, especially when you're in a crowd. When there are a lot of people around, find a place to rest, for example by sitting on the edge or standing apart.
If you are an HSP and are very sensitive to the environment, try to choose a location that provides emotional space. For example, when you eat at a restaurant, sit at a table with your back to the wall. Do not choose a table in the middle of the room, near the toilet, or near the trash can
Step 4. Develop a sense of inner peace
Learn to focus on stressful situations, by breathing or imagining a place that makes you happy. This is especially useful when you're starting to feel like you're getting into other people's emotions. Take a deep breath and let go of all the negativity for a few minutes. It will help you to focus and let go of fear or other bad emotions.
- Think of negativity as a gray mist rising from the body, and hope as a golden light entering it. You can get fast results this way.
- Try breathing techniques and yoga. These techniques teach emotional concentration and provide space to rest when you're exhausted. Your breathing habits have been formed to follow the rhythm of life. This habit can sometimes prevent you from getting the optimal amount of oxygen for your body to use at the right times. However, you can adjust your breathing by practicing yoga or other breathing techniques/techniques, so you can better control the negative emotions that arise.
Method 4 of 4: Making Positive Changes to Strengthen Yourself
Step 1. Develop positive emotions that increase your inner strength
If you are surrounded by peace and love, you will thrive on balancing the negative emotions that make you feel uncomfortable. Studies show that when you have more positive emotions, you will feel more fulfilled in life.
- Think of someone you love. Think of the warmth and joy you feel when you are around him. Now, use the same feeling towards someone you don't really know. Find something about him that makes you happy. Then, use that feeling again to look at the people around you. As you learn to recognize the positive qualities of others, you can develop positive emotions within yourself so that you focus on the good things in life, thereby suppressing your negative feelings.
- Develop other positive emotions. Smile often. When you smile, your brain releases chemicals that promote positive thoughts.
- Do the things you like. When you do a fun hobby, you are surrounding yourself with positive feelings.
Step 2. Look for positive people and situations
Surround yourself with people who make you feel comfortable and who are supportive. A positive perspective can affect the overall health of the body, the same way a negative perspective can. You probably won't be able to completely get rid of your sensitivity to other people's emotions, so it's better to choose positive people over negative people.
Call a friend who is able to see the good in other people. Spend time with colleagues who see the bright side of things. Listen to hopeful people. Appreciate words, songs, and works of art that radiate hope
Step 3. Manage your emotional baggage
Because some people are empaths and are generally more sensitive to what's going on in their environment than their fellow human beings, they can feel very distressed in situations that are even normal for others. However, no matter how sensitive you are, you don't have to hold back on absorbing other people's emotions.
Understand that some situations can be too stressful for you. Avoid these situations. For example, if you know you will absorb the pressure of people shopping for Christmas, avoid stores during that season
Step 4. Find out your inner creativity
HSP people often show excessive levels of creativity in aesthetic-related activities. Some philosophers consider the capacity to be creative as essential for growth and self-transformation. Creativity really belongs to everyone, regardless of whether we have ever used a brush or not. In this way, a sense of art can arise whenever you are conversing with other people, or when you are making breakfast. Learn to be more creative in everyday life.
Experiment with daily activities or personal style. This can be a great way to turn an extremely high sensitivity to stimuli in the environment into a blessing rather than a curse
Step 5. Turn empathy into positive action
When you're feeling drained by other people's emotions, use these feelings to pursue something positive. Find goals that are relevant to the emotions you are feeling.
For example, walking with the homeless might cause pain in the heart for a very sensitive person. These feelings can then prevent him from visiting certain cities or neighborhoods. If this happens to you, invest that emotional energy in something constructive. You can volunteer at homeless shelters, buy food, or listen to their life stories
Step 6. Be loving towards yourself
Learn to use love as a way of defending yourself against overwhelming emotions. Love enables you to empathize with others, but it also obliges you to love yourself. This means you don't have to feel guilty about wanting to rest when you're tired.
Pay attention to the general human qualities that are in you. You are not alone. When you accept the fact that the feelings you feel are part of the human experience, you will feel less alienated. For example, when you feel too tired, tell yourself this: “Everyone feels too tired sometimes”
Step 7. Accept yourself as you are
Sometimes being very sensitive to your environment can make you feel weird by others, especially when they are friendly and sociable. This is because HSPs and empaths are usually introverts too. In fact, about 70 percent of people with HSP are introverted, so you may feel strange to others around you. However, because your sensitivity level is unique to your own body, you have to accept it as a part of yourself.
Step 8. Put yourself in various situations
Empathy tends to occur spontaneously, and can produce very different emotions depending on the situation. If you're around the same people every day, it can be difficult to determine what kind of emotion they are causing. When you try a situation you would normally avoid, you may respond differently.
