How to Cope With Loss and Sadness: 15 Steps

2024 Author: Jason Gerald | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-16 10:50

When you lose someone or something very precious to you, the sadness you experience can be profound. Sadness, bitter memories, and unanswered questions can continue to haunt you. Maybe you even feel like you'll never be able to go back to how you used to be-never be able to laugh or feel whole again. Believe in yourself - while there's no way to grieve without feeling sad, there are constructive ways to deal with grief that can help you move forward. Don't endure an unhappy life-try to overcome the loss you are going through and, slowly but surely, you will feel better.

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Method 1 of 2: Coping With Sadness

Step 1. Deal with the loss

After experiencing a deep loss, we sometimes want to do something-anything-to get rid of the sadness. Doing harmful habits such as using drugs, self-destructing by drinking alcohol, sleeping too much, using the internet continuously, or engaging in promiscuity will threaten your own well-being and leave you vulnerable to addiction and prolonged feelings of sadness. You will never truly recover until you have the courage to face this loss. Ignoring the sadness caused by the loss or calming yourself down by distracting yourself will only keep things going-no matter how quickly you run away, in the end, sadness will overwhelm you again. Face your loss. Leave it alone if you want to cry or grieve in any other way that feels natural. You can only overcome sadness after you first admit that you are really feeling sad.

If the feeling of loss is still fresh in your mind, the sadness you feel deserves your full attention. But you have to set boundaries so you don't feel sad for a long time. Give yourself a certain amount of time-perhaps a few days to a week-to be truly sad. But lingering in sadness will eventually make you trapped in a sense of loss, helpless because you continue to feel sorry for yourself and unable to move forward

Step 2. Let go of your sadness

Let the tears flow. Never be afraid to cry, even if crying isn't your thing. Realize that there is no right or wrong way to feel sad or express it. The important thing is that you recognize this sadness and try to overcome it. You are free to decide how you want to do it and everyone's way of course will be different from one another.

Find a way to channel your sadness. If you feel the need to do a certain activity when you're feeling down, do it (as long as it doesn't hurt yourself or others.) Crying, punching pillows, running long distances, throwing things outside, driving to other places far away, shouting loudly in the woods or some other place where you can be alone, and rewriting your memories are some of the ways that some people can channel their grief. All of these methods are equally good.
Avoid things that can harm yourself or others. Loss doesn't have to cause harm or make things worse. Loss is a time to learn how to use the power of your inner emotions and learn to deal with grief.

Step 3. Share your feelings with others

It would be great if you look for people who will take care of you when you are suffering. If you can't find a friend, count on someone to share your love with or a priest, counselor, or therapist. Even if you're feeling confused, confused and erratic, talking to someone you trust is a way to get rid of all the sadness you're feeling inside of you. See this conversation as a form of "organizing" your emotions-your thoughts don't have to line up or give reasons. Your feelings just need to be expressed.

If you're worried that people listening to you might get confused or disappointed by what you're trying to say, it's a good idea to give a little explanation up front to ease your concerns. Let them understand that you are feeling sad, disappointed, confused, etc., and even though what you say may not make sense, you appreciate having someone willing to listen. A friend or supporter who cares will certainly not mind

Step 4. Keep yourself away from people who cannot love others

Unfortunately, not everyone you talk to when you're grieving is someone willing to help you. Just ignore people who say things like "try to do it," "don't be too sensitive," "I get over it pretty quickly when it happens to me," and so on. They don't know how you feel, so they don't care anymore if their response turns out to be just a disdain for the other person. Tell them "You don't need to be around me anymore while I'm working on all these problems if you'd mind sticking with it. But I have to sort this out, no matter how you feel, so just let me sort it out myself."

People who belittle your grief may be your well-intentioned (but misguided) friends. Call them again when you feel stronger. For now, distance yourself from their impatience-you can't force emotional recovery

Step 5. Don't be sorry

After you lose someone, you may feel guilty. You may have thoughts such as, "I wish I could say goodbye one last time," or "I wish I could have treated him better." Don't let yourself be consumed by guilt. You can not change the past by constantly regretting it. It's not your fault if you have to lose a loved one. Instead of dwelling on what you could actually do or should have done, focus on what you can do-control your emotions and keep moving forward.

If you feel guilty after a loss, talk to someone else who knows your loved one or pet. They can certainly help you convince yourself that this loss was not your fault

Step 6. Keep things that remind you of your loved ones

You don't always have to remember someone or your pet just because they're gone. It might help to understand that even if your loved one or pet is no longer here, the friendship, love and personal bond you have with them will always be there. No one can take that away from you, and the relationship you have with them will always be a part of you. Having a keepsake is worth keeping so that it can remind you of your own passion, of your perseverance and of your ability to create a better future.

Keep keepsakes that remind you of your loved ones or pets somewhere out of sight. Take it out again if you need a tangible reminder to remind you of your past story. Leaving these mementos out in the open is not a good idea. Having items that remind you of someone who has passed away will make it harder for you to move on with your life

Step 7. Seek help

In our society, there is a very dangerous misconception that is directed at people who seek help in dealing with their emotional problems. See a therapist or counselor no will make you a weak or pathetic person. This is actually a sign of strength. By seeking the help you need, you show an admirable desire to step forward and overcome your grief. Feel free to schedule an appointment with a professional-in 2004, more than a quarter of American adults had seen a therapist in the past two years.

Method 2 of 2: Strive for Happiness

Step 1. Distract from the sadness

Try to remember the fun times and the most beautiful memories you've ever had with your deceased loved one or pet. Your attention to negative thoughts or disappointments will not change what has already happened. This will only make you feel worse. Rest assured that no one who has ever given you happiness will want you to continue to be sad. Try recalling things like the way this person spoke, his quirky behavior, the times the two of you laughed together and the things you were taught about life and yourself.

If you have ever lost a pet, remember the good times you had together, the wonderful life you gave him, and the special qualities he had.
Whenever you feel tempted to feel even more sad, angry, or feeling sorry for yourself, take a diary and write down all the good things you can remember about the person or pet you lost. When you are sad, you can read this note as a reminder of the happiness you have experienced.

Step 2. Divert your attention

By keeping yourself busy and doing activities that require your undivided attention, you will break yourself from the habit of constantly thinking about the loss. This will also provide an opportunity so that you can realize that there are still good things in your life.

While work or study can provide relief from persistent thoughts of loss, don't rely on your routine to distract yourself because you'll feel like all there is is work and sadness and nothing else. Re-acquaint yourself with the pursuit of happiness by doing activities that can give you peace. There are many things to do, such as gardening, cooking, fishing, listening to your favorite music, walking, drawing, painting, writing, and so on. Choose anything that can make you feel calm and give you an exhilarating sense of accomplishment (which can't always be experienced by doing daily work or by studying).
Try getting involved in social work. Divert your attention from your own problems to the problems of others. You might consider volunteering. If you like playing with young children, helping them while seeing their spontaneity and laughter will lighten your load.

Step 3. Find the joy of a beautiful day

A common symptom of grief is staying home and neglecting your life outside. If you can already leave your sadness as your past, take the opportunity to enjoy the sunny days. Take time to walk, contemplate and just observe the natural beauty around you. Don't try to chase a particular feeling-let the warmth of the sun wash over you and the sounds of nature flow through you. Admire the beauty of the trees and the architecture you see. Let the hustle and bustle of life remind you that the world is beautiful. Life will go on – you deserve to be a part of it and eventually rejoin the daily routine.

There is some scientific evidence showing that sunlight is beneficial as a natural anti-depressant. Going outside can help you get over your fears

Step 4. Have another picture of what you are missing out on

If you lose someone, unfortunately you will never be able to physically enjoy their presence again. However, this does not mean that your deceased loved one or pet is completely out of this world as an image or symbol. Know that your deceased loved one or pet lives on in your thoughts, words and actions. When we say, do, or think something that is influenced by someone who has passed away, he or she is still alive.

There are certain religions that teach that the soul or essence of a person remains after the physical body dies. Other religions teach that a person's core will be transformed into another form or sent back to earth. If you are a religious person, you can take comfort in the fact that the person who left you is still there in a spiritual sense

Step 5. Make time to hang out with good people

It can be hard to motivate yourself so you can get outside and spend time with your friends after your loss. But if you can do it, you can feel an improvement in your mood. It's a good idea to find friends who can understand your emotional state even if you're not fully recovered. Find friends or acquaintances who are fun, but kind and sensitive. They will help you return to your usual social role, which in turn will help you to stay active once you have recovered from grief.

The first get-together after a major loss can feel a bit uncomfortable or awkward because your friends may be worried about how to start talking about this. Don't let this situation discourage you - you'll have to get back into your normal social life at some point. Hang in there - although it could take weeks or months for things to look completely "normal" again, spending time with good friends is always a good idea

Step 6. Don't pretend to be happy

Once you get back into your normal routine, you may feel that certain careers or social situations require you to be a happier person than you really are. While you should try not to allow yourself to be sad again, you should also try not to "force" your own happiness. "Forced" happiness can be unpleasant-it can be overwhelming if you have to smile when you really don't want to. Don't think of happiness as a chore! It's fine if you have to look and act seriously in your social and work life, as long as you don't do anything that could get in the way of other people's happiness. Hold on to your smile until you feel genuine happiness-this smile is sure to be much cuter.

Step 7. Let time heal

Time will heal all wounds. Your emotional recovery may take months or years-but that's okay. In the course of time, you will eventually be able to respect the person who left you more through a renewed determination to enjoy your life to the fullest.

Don't worry-you can never forget those you love. Nor can you misplace the forces within you that have led you to seek your lost goals or successes. What may change is the way you view your life from now on-perhaps there is a sharper focus, a new understanding of values or a completely changed perspective on certain aspects of your life. But this progress will not happen, if you do not give yourself time to heal.
While you should give yourself sufficient time to heal, at the same time, you must remember that your life is precious and that you are responsible for doing your best to occupy your time in this moment. Your goal in life is to feel happy, not sad. Don't rush to get rid of grief, but don't be content with partial recovery. Make your recovery journey a gradual improvement. You owe it to yourself to do it - keep moving forward, no matter how long it takes.

Step 8. Don't doubt your happiness

Don't feel bad for feeling good! There is no fixed time for recovery from loss. If you've regained your happiness sooner rather than later, don't feel guilty about "not grieving enough." If you feel like you've recovered from the loss, you maybe it's recovered.

Don't set a time limit for grieving, but don't delay your happiness. Never force yourself to be sadder than you need to be.

Tips

If someone tells you to "work on it," don't argue with them. This will only make you feel worse, because it will make you feel as if you have a weaker tolerance for emotions than other people. In other words, you'll start to believe that there's a problem with the way you deal with grief, when there really isn't. It's just the way you feel. Don't listen to them, because they don't understand the relationship you have with the one you love. You will heal in your own way and at a time that is most convenient for you.
Remember that everyone has different feelings. Don't worry if you. experience harder times during recovery than anyone else, even to cope with the same sense of loss. This usually shows how close you are to the one you love. There are people who won't cry, while others take months to stop crying.
Don't regret anything. Don't let yourself continue to feel sad just because you didn't get a chance to say you're sorry or "I love you" or "goodbye." You can still say it.
You are free to think about other things. No one says that you have to stay in the loss to prove your grief or to show others how much this loss means to you. Other people already know that you are going through a meltdown; You don't have to prove or explain anything.
Life is beautiful – there are lots of pleasant surprises in it for you. Just go ahead and smile, visit new places, and meet people you don't know.
Patience is the key. Don't push yourself if what you want doesn't come naturally.
Music can be a fun way to deal with the loss and sadness you're going through. Try to replace sad songs with more uplifting ones, because you will make yourself feel sad just by listening to sad music over and over again.
Love yourself. If you fall (and you do), laugh at yourself, get up and move on.
Grief takes place in a unique process, and varies from person to person. Not everyone recovers right away, and after that, no one will be overly disappointed.
Don't let that "if only" feeling get the better of you. "If only I could do better." "If only I had given time to visit more often."
Don't blame yourself. It won't explain anything and won't make you feel any better.
Try playing with your pet, they can tell you when you're feeling down, and playing with them might help.
If you need to cry, cry. Release your emotions. It's not good to keep it in your heart.
Don't be afraid to feel sorry because regret will come and you can't stop it. Don't let these feelings rule you. It's not the same as saying "I love you," or "I'm sorry," to someone who has died but just say it until you feel like they've heard it. The guilt will still be there. Try shouting out loud in a place where no one else can say what you want to say.