Getting bad grades may have been experienced by almost everyone while studying. It is undeniable that bad grades can make us feel disappointed and discouraged, plus the stress of having to tell our parents. However, you can't dodge and have to tell them. Remember, parents only want the best for you. So, prepare well and face the consequences.
Step
Part 1 of 4: Preparing Yourself
Step 1. Calm down
Control your emotions before showing value to your parents. Anxiety and nervousness will actually make you think no. Remember, one day this situation will no longer matter and will only become a memory. The sooner you tell them, the sooner this moment will pass, and you can start thinking about ways to fix it.
- Take a deep breath and think about pleasant things.
- Try to forget about those bad grades for an hour and do something that makes you happy, like reading a book or playing a game.
Step 2. Prepare before talking to parents
Think about the positive things that you have achieved so far. This way, you can announce the good news as well as the bad news. If you can't remember something, have a plan in place to improve your grades. Make a solid plan or physical evidence of how you will get better grades in the future.
- Plan to meet with the teacher, or talk to the teacher about the bad grades first.
- Make a study plan.
- Don't hide or throw away bad test scores. You may be tempted to hide, pretend to “forget” or throw out bad grades. Do not do it. Sooner or later, the truth will be revealed too. Maybe the bad grades should be signed by the parents, or it will be reflected in the declining grades in the report card.
- Being honest is the best way. Your parent's punishment and reaction will be worse if you delay telling them.
Step 3. Choose the right moment
Try to prepare the right conditions to deliver the bad news. Do not choose a time when they are in a crowded place, or at a family recreation event. The ideal time to let them know is during or after dinner as they usually don't have anything else to do.
- Don't tell them the bad news right away when they get home from work. Give them a chance to rest before starting a serious conversation.
- Schedule a meeting with your parents if you can't find a time to talk to them.
Step 4. Show respect
Don't be defensive or rude in handling this situation. Your parents will respond better if you are polite and wise. Talk to your parents as you would any other parent.
- Never use insulting or swearing words.
- Don't speak in a high voice. Speak in a calm, steady voice.
Part 2 of 4: Talking to Parents
Step 1. Tell the parents that you want to talk to them
If you get the right opportunity, ask your parents if they are willing to talk to you. Find a quiet place that provides enough privacy. Try to have the conversation sitting down, not standing, because the discussion could take a long time.
Show confidence and a serious attitude when you approach your parents. Don't act stupid or show resentment. Your parents may react positively if you behave well
Step 2. Don't go overboard with explanations
Get straight to the point. Don't manipulate the conversation and try to benefit your situation. For example, you could say, "I got a bad score," or "I'm sorry, yesterday's test/test was not good."
Step 3. Be honest
Don't make excuses. It may be easier to cover up your grades, or find excuses to justify them. Dishonesty and excuses won't do you any good because they won't change your grades. Your parents will appreciate and acknowledge the fact that you're being candid and honest about these values.
There is a difference between making excuses and an actual excuse for a bad grade. You have to be able to tell the difference. The excuse reads like this, “The exam is complicated by the teacher.” An excuse would sound something like, “I don't understand the exam material.”
Step 4. Tell me why your score is bad
You can simply provide a brief statement at first, although parents may want further explanation. Be honest when you explain what happened. If you don't study, say it frankly. If you've tried, but still get unsatisfactory grades, let them know.
- Try saying, “I had a hard time understanding the test material,” or “I didn't study. So, I can't do the problem well."
- Be honest with yourself why you got bad grades. Don't try to convince yourself that it's not your fault.
- If that's the case, just admit that you should have studied harder. It will show that you are learning from your mistakes.
Step 5. Explain how you will make the change
Explain the plans you made, and what you will do to improve yourself in the future. Show teacher comments, study plans, or explain how you would avoid distractions that could break your concentration.
- Tell your parents that you will try to arrange a meeting with the teacher, turn off your cell phone and TV while studying, and study for at least an hour in the evening.
- Physical evidence or a well-thought-out plan will be more convincing than comments made during a conversation.
Step 6. Look at the problem from the right perspective
So far, you may have been a good student. So remind your parents of that. They probably won't overreact if they are reminded that you usually get good grades. However, don't underestimate a bad score if it's happened several times.
- You could say, “I might get a bad grade this time, but that's rare. I will try to do better in the next exam.”
- If you've had bad grades a few times, just say, "I haven't had a good grade lately, but I'll do my best to improve."
Part 3 of 4: Dealing with Parents' Reaction
Step 1. Listen to what parents have to say
Know that your parents want the best for you so they feel anxious if they think your future will be ruined. After all, parents have also been to school, and they may also have had poor grades. Take their advice, and understand that they are frustrated because they care about you.
- Don't argue if they give advice. If you're rude or rude, your parents will think you don't take them or the situation you're in seriously.
- They may be angry or frustrated, and that's normal. On the other hand, if they commit physical or mental violence, it cannot be considered normal. Talk to your teacher or authorities if you experience violence.
Step 2. Propose them to give a fair punishment
Before they pass the sentence, offer the punishment that you think is fair enough first. Tell them that you're willing to spend less time watching TV, or that you won't be going to parties on the weekends to study. This action shows parents that you recognize that poor grades are a problem, and that you are willing to work on that problem.
Step 3. Accept the punishment
Your parents may accept or reject your proposal. They may decide on a different punishment that they deem more appropriate. No problem, just accept the punishment. Don't argue, or try to deny it.
Don't go against the punishment given. Don't try to sneak out if you're not allowed to leave the house, or don't watch TV if your parents tell you not to
Step 4. Make sure parents have up-to-date information
Many schools have systems that allow parents to view student grades via the internet. If they haven't got the information to access it, provide it. Or, if your school doesn't have such a system, make an Excel spreadsheet and enter your grades and give them to your parents every week.
Providing information to your parents on a regular basis will motivate you to improve and show them that you care about your values
Part 4 of 4: Fixing Values
Step 1. Ask your parents for help
Suggest that they sit down together and help you with your homework. If you have trouble understanding a subject, ask them to find a tutor (if possible). If you don't have any ideas for improving your grades, ask them for advice.
Parents' involvement with schoolwork may make them more tolerant if you get bad grades in the future
Step 2. Explain all the problems you face to them
Tell them anything that is hindering your learning process. Don't be afraid to tell everything. Talk about bullying, distractions or problems that are making it difficult for you to concentrate at school. Parents are there to help you.
- You can say, “Something is bothering you at school (or at home). So, I can't concentrate on studying."
- Report to the teacher if there is a disturbance at school or if a classmate is bullying.
Step 3. Avoid bad habits in the future
Many bad habits can lead to bad grades. Avoiding this habit in the future will help you study better, thus preventing confrontations with your parents that stress you out. Some of these bad habits include:
- Cheating on a friend's homework and not doing it yourself.
- Don't ask questions, even though you don't understand the topic being explained.
- Cheating on tests or exams.
- Forgetting deadlines for submitting essays, projects, quizzes, exams, and so on. Make a calendar to remind you of school assignments due.
- Not taking notes in class. Taking notes during the lesson will help you concentrate so you don't daydream and pay attention to the lesson.
Tips
- Feel free to ask the teacher for additional help.
- Don't misbehave before telling your parents about bad grades.
- Adhere to the study schedule. Take time each evening to reread course material or study for an exam.
- Don't forget to do your homework because it will help you prepare for the exam.
- Don't miss studying just because you have to attend an event. Stick to a study schedule because studying will be more beneficial than a party.
Warning
- Do not hide, omit, or discard bad grades. The punishment will be more severe if the parents find out.
- Try to distinguish between good punishment and bad punishment. If you think your parents are being violent, don't be afraid to ask for help.
