In English, there is a saying that says "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade". This well-known saying basically teaches you to do your best, even if you face a difficult situation (in other words, turn obstacles into opportunities). If you come across or face an unpleasant situation (in this case, described by the sourness of lemonade), try your best to get the best out of the situation. However, the saying may be easier said than applied to everyday life. Therefore, learn to have a more optimistic attitude in the face of difficulties or obstacles in life.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Taking the Best of a Bad Situation
Step 1. Look for life lessons from the situation at hand
You can get through bad situations more easily if you view them as opportunities to learn. There is something that can actually be learned from every situation or condition you face. This way, you can deal with bad situations in a constructive way. Find lessons from the situation at hand and apply what you have learned in the future.
When you face a problem, think of it as a challenge that can make you stronger when facing problems in the future. Ask yourself, “What can be learned from this situation?” That way, you can go through the situation and trust that you can make wiser and more careful decisions
Step 2. Control the things you can basically control
People automatically feel better when faced with a bad situation when they can control everything at hand. It's true that we can't control many things in life (eg the weather, or the price of fuel). However, we need to focus on the things we can control to improve our outlook on life.
For example, the researchers found that optimism was found in people who had more control over certain situations, such as a driver involved in a traffic accident or a patient with skin cancer, compared to people with less control., such as car passengers involved in traffic accidents or patients who are required to wear hearing aids
Step 3. Get social support
Whatever you're facing, calm yourself down by reminding yourself that there are people willing to help you. Regardless of whether you are facing financial problems, a breakup or recovering from a health problem, there will be someone who understands your situation. When you connect or interact with these people, you won't feel alone.
You can always call or ask a friend or family member for help when you are in a difficult situation. However, don't hesitate to ask for further help from a religious leader or counselor. You can also contact people who have been or are experiencing the same situation through websites or forums on the internet (eg Kaskus)
Step 4. Change your use of language on yourself
Often people do not realize the true meaning of what they say. We often just say it and it 'invites' moodiness or negativism. A study shows that a single negative word can stimulate the production of stress-inducing chemicals in the brain. There are some words you can avoid using to keep yourself optimistic.
- Replace the word "should" with "can". For example: “I can work out at the gym today” (in this case, it could indicate an opportunity to work out at the gym).
- Replace the word “problem” with “situation”. For example: There is a situation we need to talk about.
- Replace the word “mistake” with the phrase “valuable lesson”. For example: “We all learned from the valuable lessons you taught.”
- Replace the words “bad” or “wrong” with the phrase “inappropriate”. For example: “I made the wrong choice”.
Method 2 of 3: Learn to Face the Situation
Step 1. Develop the ability to deal with problems in a healthy way
You may have heard that the seriousness of a problem is often not determined by the situation at hand, but by your reaction to the situation. Being optimistic is just as important as controlling your reactions and thought patterns. Having healthy or positive skills that you can apply when dealing with situations that make you depressed or upset is key to maintaining optimism. These abilities include:
- Maintaining positive friendship
- Stay active (physically)
- Using jokes to lighten the mood
- Depends on spirituality
- Practice meditation
- Leaving reality through reading
- Pursuing interests and hobbies
- Spending time with pets
Step 2. Try to stay focused on the situation at hand
Don't try or 'force' yourself to be happy because doing so can have the opposite effect. Instead of trying to be happy, try to stay focused on the situation at hand. Enjoy the moments of happiness that you get. Then, if you are 'stuck' in a negative thought pattern, use the ability to deal with problems in a healthy manner so that you stay focused on dealing with the situation and stay away from thoughts that make you feel down. By staying focused on the situation at hand, pessimistic attitudes can be resisted.
Step 3. Practice being grateful
One of the unquestionable ways that you can look at life in a positive light and be able to turn obstacles into opportunities is to develop a spirit of gratitude. Science shows that being consistently grateful can bring benefits, including more happiness and job opportunities, decreased feelings of loneliness and isolation, improved immune function, and a more compassionate attitude or behavior towards others.
- Cultivate a sense of gratitude in life by starting to notice the small and amazing things that happen every day. These include hearing children's laughter, having time to 'hide' under the covers while reading an interesting book, enjoying a sumptuous meal, or hugging someone you care about.
- Make sure you not only pay attention to the little miracles you encounter every day, but also take note of them. Keep a gratitude journal containing the small kindnesses shown to you throughout the day, as well as more detailed information about specific events or situations for which you are grateful.
Step 4. Live a healthy lifestyle
If you take good care of your physical and mental health, it will be easier for you to see (and appreciate) your accomplishments than to focus on the flaws in your life. A healthy lifestyle consists of:
- Exercise regularly, for about 30 minutes, five times a week
- Eat a balanced diet, about 3 to 5 times a day
- Get enough sleep for 7 to 9 hours
- Managing or controlling stress (using stress management skills)
- Have fun or do things that make you laugh and smile
Step 5. Achieve balance in life
No one has a life that is, absolutely, good or bad. Being realistic is an important step in being optimistic. However, over-optimism (usually expressed through the 'everything will always be good' view) can shatter your expectations. In addition, not regularly reviewing life goals to ensure they remain realistic can also set you back down the same 'road' or failure.
Step 6. Refrain from making comparisons
Trying to elevate and compare your life and achievements with others is a bad habit that needs to be abandoned. Such comparisons can leave you feeling constantly uncomfortable and dissatisfied with yourself because there is always someone more attractive, richer, or more successful. Instead, try to stop idealizing various aspects of life and start accepting that each person has their own strengths and weaknesses.
- Instead of looking at someone from the outside and making other people's lives ideal, you need to realistically assume that that person has made mistakes and had bad days. No one is perfect in this world.
- Accept the fact that there are many more things that can't be seen just from a person's appearance (eg weaknesses or flaws). This way, you won't feel resentful or dissatisfied with your flaws.
Step 7. Stay with positive people
The unquestionable way to keep yourself in the light is to spend time with people who can appreciate you and make you valuable.
The environment around us has a great influence on our thoughts, feelings, and behavior. When you are surrounded by supportive friends and family members, you have the greatest opportunity for growth
Method 3 of 3: Changing Your Mindset
Step 1. Recognize the benefits of optimism
Optimistic people (those who always see the bright side of things) tend to do or do things better, from work/school life to relationships. They not only have better lives, but also longer lives. The good news is that you don't have to be born optimistic to reap these benefits because optimism can be learned.
Researchers point out that optimism can be taught through a number of behaviors or actions, including getting affection, having the opportunity to take risks and experience failure, and seeing others who have an optimistic attitude
Step 2. Avoid negative thought patterns
The first step in turning obstacles into opportunities is to be aware of your negativity. If you're not aware of your tendency to only see the bad side of things, you can't change this habit. Always observe your thoughts every day and identify the negative assumptions you often make.
- When you notice a negative thought pattern, avoid it by finding something more positive to say or think. For example, you might fail a test at school and conclude "I'm not good at anything!" Instead of thinking that way, change the thought to, for example, "Mathematics is hard, but I'm good at English and history."
- If you've always been a pessimist, it would seem dishonest to just shake off the negative thoughts that naturally arise. Fight these false feelings and over time, you can think more optimistically.
Step 3. Expect the best results
People who work in various fields or industries (including professional athletes and top executives) often create visualizations to help them find success. By describing success, you can achieve or do four things: come up with creative ideas that are useful in achieving the desired results, program the brain to seek and pay attention to the resources needed to achieve success, attract people and positive things to your life. you (eg apply the law of attraction), and give you the motivation needed to take appropriate action.
Visualization technique is a technique that is quite easy to master. Take a few minutes each day to cool off. Close your eyes and imagine that you are living your life with accomplished goals. Pay attention to what is there in detail and activate your body senses so that the picture seems more real to you
Step 4. Prepare for the worst
Being optimistic can indeed make you more relieved and confident in living life, but the pessimistic side in yourself often fights that optimistic attitude so you need to have self-support. You may have heard the saying “Prepare an umbrella before it rains”. The proverb teaches you to always be prepared if at any time you experience something bad. In this regard, you still need to think optimistically and hope for the best in a situation, but you also need to prepare a plan in case you ever get the worst.
