You have to be honest with yourself to find out what can really make you happy in life. No one shares the same opinion as to what life satisfaction means, no matter how compatible he is with someone. Therefore, you need to look deep within yourself to find what is best for you as an individual. This article will help you to discover what can make you happy. Apart from that, this article also contains some suggestions that you can apply to achieve that happiness.
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Part 1 of 4: Knowing What Can Make You Happy
Step 1. Evaluate your core values
List the three aspects of your life that are most important to you, and rank them in order of importance. If you believe in the existence of God, is your family more important than your faith in God or vice versa? Which is more important to you, spending time doing what you love that makes you personally happy, or focusing on your career to support and provide your family with the life they deserve?
By ranking your values and your priorities in life, it will be easier for you to know whether or not you are putting enough energy into each aspect of your life
Step 2. Make a list of activities you enjoy
In this case, there is no right or wrong answer, but you have to be honest about it. Maybe sightseeing is the activity that makes you the happiest, or maybe it's good food that makes you the most happy. Maybe you enjoy talking about books, and you need to be a literary critic. Maybe you'd rather be the one who writes the book than the one who talks about books written by other people.
This list may change over time. What made you happy at twenty may not be what made you happy at thirty. Don't get caught up in "who you are" - update your list of activities that make you happy from time to time to find what makes you happy right now
Step 3. Avoid measuring happiness based on possessions
Owning a lot of luxury items may make a lot of people happy, but don't fool yourself into thinking that the root of happiness is your possessions. You may want to have good speakers because you love music, but you should focus your happiness on your love of music, not on having good speakers. Realize that going to concerts, singing with friends, and whistling while driving to work are as important a part as any fancy loudspeaker when it comes to making yourself happy.
Step 4. Practice meditation
Meditation can be very beneficial for mental health as well as happiness. In addition, meditation can also enlighten the mind so that you can know your priorities more easily. Although meditation originates from a religion associated with mystical things, meditation techniques can be used by anyone for relaxation and stress relief.
- Find a quiet environment free of distractions from noises and activities - a place where you can enlighten your mind and focus on how you are feeling in your life right now.
- Sit in a comfortable position like a lotus flower with your eyes closed, and focus on your breathing.
- Inhale and exhale slowly and deeply without holding it.
- Focus on your breathing, how you feel as air moves in and out of your body. Center your body completely for the moment, and do your best not to think about anything else.
- Do this at the same time each day to make it a part of your routine. The morning before you go to work is a good time to meditate because meditation can keep you calm and ready for the day.
Part 2 of 4: Knowing What You Want in a Career
Step 1. Make a list of your strengths
The most fulfilling careers are those that make the best use of your greatest abilities. If you're a good speaker, and you really enjoy doing presentations, you're only wasting your talent if you work at a desk doing programming. Maybe you should be a teacher!
- Are you a good speaker?
- Do you work very well doing it individually or in a group?
- Do you work best when you are told to do a task, or when you have to lead your own project?
Step 2. Make a list of your greatest hopes
While not everyone can have the career they really want, most people should be able to match their interests and careers at some point.
There are many tests you can take to find out what type of job best fits your interests
Step 3. Think of a work schedule that works best for you
Some people don't like to work every day from nine in the morning to five in the afternoon at the office. If you need the freedom to be able to work at your own pace, set your own hours, and choose your own place of work, maybe you can look for freelance or contract work. Others simply can't imagine the shifting work schedule of a university lecturer, and want a fixed work schedule from nine in the morning to five in the afternoon Monday to Friday.
- Ask yourself what kind of work schedule best fits your work habits.
- Don't choose freelance work if you can't manage your time and it's easy to lose focus!
- Be aware that freelance and contract work are less stable than regular office work, and usually don't offer any other advantages.
Step 4. Calculate the living budget you need
While you shouldn't choose a job just because of money, you also certainly don't want your hard work not to make enough money for yourself and your family. Calculate how much money you need to keep you and your family's life comfortable and not lacking.
Look online for information on the average salaries of various career paths. Find out if the career you're thinking about can fit your budget
Step 5. Don't be afraid to switch professions
If you're stuck in a job you hate, you're probably dreaming of a career that could actually satisfy you. However, there are also other things like time, ego, and fear of financial stability that can keep you from finding a career that can truly satisfy you. You can put everything but your career satisfaction aside.
To prepare for a career path change, you should start saving as much money as possible. A career change sometimes means that you have to start your new job from a lower paying position before you can be in a higher position
Part 3 of 4: Knowing What You Want in a Relationship
Step 1. If you're planning to spend the rest of your life with someone, you'll want to find a partner who shares your outlook on life
What kind of a shared view of life should your partner really have? Here are some examples that may be very important for you to take into account:
- Wanting a big family vs not wanting kids
- Religion
- Views on marriage and/or divorce
Step 2. Write down a list of qualities your partner should have
You'll never be able to find someone who really does everything you want, so you have to be realistic about the most important qualities your partner should have. Prioritize the things you look for in a relationship and determine the five most important elements of those things. Here are some examples you might consider:
- Sense of humor
- Handsome or beautiful appearance
- Have the same taste in music or hobbies as you
- Enjoy/avoid outdoor activities
- Financial Stability
Step 3. Learn to be happy with yourself
Regardless of how good your partner will be, you can never be happy in the relationship until you can be happy with yourself. You can also know what you want and need from your partner better if you are the best version of yourself, and you are happy about it.
Step 4. While knowing what you want in a relationship is a good thing, don't shut yourself off from a good potential partner just because he or she doesn't fulfill some of the things you wrote down on a piece of paper
Admit that you can never find someone who fulfills everything you want, and be open to spending time with someone you feel comfortable with.
Part 4 of 4: Knowing What You Want from a Family
Step 1. Decide if you want to have children
Some people know that they want to be the parents of their children from a young age, but for others it is not easy to decide. There's nothing wrong with this! Don't let anyone like your parents, friends, or even society in general pressure you into choosing something you don't want. Here are a few things to keep in mind:
- Are you called to be a parent? Although this is more often determined on the part of women (biological habits of the body, maternal instincts), both men and women sometimes feel the urge to start a family. While for some others there is no such encouragement.
- Are you able to support your family? In 2014, the estimated cost of raising a child from birth to legal adulthood in America was $245,000. How can you afford to meet these cost estimates based on your family income? Are you able to give your children a good quality of life? Can you have a comfortable retirement?
- Do you understand the reality of raising children? While most parents will say that their children are their greatest source of happiness and achievement, parents will also say how difficult it is to raise children. As a parent, it is your responsibility to protect your children from all kinds of harm, provide them with the best possible life, and educate them to be good and responsible citizens of the world. You have to be able to survive the anger you can feel at any time, the list of expensive Christmas gifts, etc. All of this requires hard work!
- Keep in mind that women can always freeze their eggs if they choose not to have children at a very suitable age for childbearing. Although women find it difficult to conceive when they are young, freezing eggs when they are young can give them a greater chance of having children if they choose to start a family later.
Step 2. Decide how big or small you want your family to be
If you have decided that you want to have children, the next step you need to take is to determine how large a family you want to be. Again, for some people this can be determined by instinct. Some people can already feel that they want to start a big family. However, you should keep in mind some practical things to consider.
- Again, in America the estimated cost of raising a child until he or she is 18 is $245,000!
- How much attention can you give to each child? A child will get as much attention from his parents as his parents can give him. However, if there is more than one child, parents' attention will be more divided on each child they have. How much time do you have to take each child to their activities after school, help each child with schoolwork, listen to each child tell their daily story, etc.?
- What kind of family do you want for your child? Even if you can give full attention to your child, having lots of siblings means that your children will always have friends who can spend time with them. In addition, they can also help each other through emotional times that they can't always share with their parents.
- You need to remember that if you have three children, you and your partner will be outnumbered. If you have two children, you and your partner can share tasks with each child in certain situations, but if there are three children, one child may be underappreciated!
Step 3. Consider whether you want to be a working parent or a stay-at-home parent
Although it was traditionally seen that a man would work and a woman would raise the children at home, nowadays both men and women can comfortably define the roles they want.
- The cost of child care services for both working parents can be very expensive depending on where they live, which may not be worth their income.
- Would you mind if your child spent a lot of time with other people, regardless of how much you trust that person?
- Do you want to watch every development that occurs in your child, and can working in an office prevent you from seeing that development?
- Will staying at home all day with your child make you uncomfortable, or feel like you're being viewed only by your identity as a parent?
- Will staying at home take you away from a job you love that allows you to fulfill and develop your passions and interests?
Step 4. Ask yourself what kind of parent you want to be
Regardless of what you may think after reading many books on parenting, there is no right or wrong way to raise children. Since ancient times, people have raised their children without having to read manuals. Even so, it's also important that you start thinking about what kind of parent you will be who can make you as happy as possible.
- Do you want to be a parent who is always involved in all the decisions and activities of their children or do you want to be a parent who allows their children to make mistakes and learn from them?
- How deeply do you want to be involved in your children's education? Will you check their homework every night? Will you provide extra homework outside of class? Or will you allow more qualified teachers to educate your children?
- How will you rebuke your children when they do something wrong? Do you feel more comfortable playing the good cop or the bad cop? Another question that can help you determine something like this is "Would you rather be like a coach who helps make good decisions, or would you rather be the referee who finds and punishes mistakes?"
- Do you put your children first, or do you prioritize your marriage? How about your own happiness?
