It's hard to ignore someone who has made you angry or sad. It will be even more difficult if you still have to interact with him in your daily life at school, work, or family events. However, you must learn to stay away from negative people. Replace him with positive and supportive people who can make you feel happy and have a stable life.
Step
Part 1 of 4: Keeping Away from Him
Step 1. Don't visit places he would otherwise go
The best way to ignore someone is to avoid meeting them altogether. You can reduce the chance of running into each other by avoiding places you usually go together or where he spends most of his time.
- Find a new restaurant, cafe, or place to eat. Look for places that are outside the person's primary environment.
- Shop at a store far from his house (if you know where he lives).
- If your friend invites you to go somewhere, ask if he or she is invited too. That way you can decide whether to go or not.
Step 2. Limit interactions with him
Limiting contact with someone is a great way to ignore them without breaking up altogether. Disconnecting completely will indeed be difficult, especially if you have a relationship with him or used to go to the same place everyday. However, limiting your contact will help you avoid having to interact with them every day, and it will make you feel better.
Step 3. Keep conversations and interactions as short and infrequent as possible
Give short, emotionless responses, and don't prolong the conversation. For example, you could say something like, “Good news. I have to get back to work now.”
- Ignore the urge to say something mean or hurtful as this will only make things worse.
- By limiting contact and avoiding non-essential interactions, you're essentially breaking ties with him without needing to cut ties in the context of polite social interactions.
Step 4. Avoid conversing with him
Whether you're in the same office, have friends in common, or like to bump into each other every now and then, avoid his attempts to talk to you. You can do this by ignoring him especially if he's trying to get you to talk.
- Avoid eye contact with him.
- Ignore his words and stifle the urge to retaliate.
- If you're in a social situation and have to say something, just share your personal opinion or feeling about something that has nothing to do with what he's saying.
- You can simply ignore what he's saying or just talk about something that interests you as if you don't hear or understand what he's saying. This is an effective way to communicate that you are not interested in whatever he has to say.
Step 5. Invite a friend if you have to chat with him or her
If you can't avoid meeting him at work or at social events, take a friend he doesn't know. This friend can help you neutralize the encounter with him. The friend can also make sure things are polite and help steer the conversation on a neutral subject if the person you don't want tries to mess up one way or another.
- Tell the friend in advance what he should do. Also make sure he doesn't mind taking on this role so he doesn't feel taken advantage of afterward.
- Prepare some kind of nonverbal signal so that the two of you can suddenly say goodbye if you have to get out of the way.
Step 6. Try to be polite to people you can't avoid
If you can't avoid a certain person, you can be very polite to him. Sometimes such an approach can curb the negative behavior that you want to avoid.
- Resist the urge to be rude to him.
- Instead, you have to be strong and confident. Show positive traits and remember that you are a strong individual and deserve to be happy.
- Don't let him piss you off with his negativity. Get up by ignoring it.
- Say something nice when you feel the urge to be rude, then excuse yourself and leave the place. For example, you might say, “Your presentation yesterday was great. Excuse me, I want to get some coffee first."
Step 7. Try to stay strong and safe
If you want to avoid someone, it's most likely because that person is negative or annoying. This type of person usually likes to make an effort (consciously or not) to upset you. Maybe he's saying that your actions are stupid or he's belittling your hopes and dreams. If you've decided not to get involved with that person, be strong and don't let them influence or change your mind.
- Even if you don't feel safe or strong, have faith that you can be strong. That way you fortify yourself from these negative people.
- Don't let his negative words and actions affect your perspective on yourself or the way you live your life. Use positive reinforcement and make sure to get rid of any negative thoughts he may have instilled in you.
- Remind yourself that you are a good person and that your friends and family love you too. it means you have positive qualities that he may not want to admit.
Part 2 of 4: Disconnecting Electronic Communication
Step 1. Block her contact number on the phone
If you want to cut off contact with someone you don't want, consider blocking them from calling or texting. This method may not be urgent if you rarely make contact with him, but it never hurts to do it.
- To block a phone call on iPhone, tap on the person's name from the contact list and select "Block This Caller". To block SMS, go to Messages, select the name of the person you want to block, and select "Details", then "Info", then "Block Contact".
- To block calls/SMS on an Android phone, go to Call Settings and select "Call Rejection" which will take you to the "Auto Reject List". From there you just have to search for and select the number you want to block.
- To block calls/SMS on Windows phones, go to Settings and select "Call + SMS Filter", then enable the "Block Calls" function. All you have to do is press-and-hold the number you want to block, select "Block Number", and press "OK".
- If you're using a BlackBerry phone, you'll need to talk to your wireless carrier to block unwanted phone numbers from calling you again.
Step 2. Disconnect on social media
Even if you try to avoid someone in person, they may still be able to contact you via social media. If you befriend or follow someone on a social media site, that person can still know what you're doing or where you're going, and they can also send threatening or harassing messages through social media.
- If you befriend/follow him on social media, unfriend or unfollow the person. You can also block them from seeing your posts and contacting you in any way.
- If you're not friends/following him on social media, or if you've unfriended him, change the privacy settings on the social media site so that only friends can see your posts.
Step 3. Prevent him from emailing you (email)
If the person you're trying to avoid has your email address, you may be concerned about getting aggressive or confrontational emails from them. This can be prevented by blocking them from sending you emails or by filtering all messages from that person (depending on which email server you are using).
- To filter emails in Gmail, block messages from that person in the Inbox by checking the checkbox to the left of it. Click the drop-down menu, select "More", then "Filter messages like these", and on the next page that opens select "Delete it".
- To block an email in Microsoft Outlook, just right-click the message from that person, then click "Junk", then "Block Sender".
Part 3 of 4: Making Yourself Happy
Step 1. Identify the things that can get you out of control
There are times when you just can't avoid meeting negative people, whether it's coworkers, relatives, or neighbors. You can't help but be around (or even interact with) negative people from time to time. When this happens, know what triggers your feelings and be aware of these triggers so you don't get upset.
- Make a list of people, places, and things that can make you feel sad, angry, or frustrated.
- Think about why these people, places, or things might trigger negative reactions in you.
- Think about how these triggers usually occur in your daily life and plan ways to avoid or minimize these unpleasant situations.
Step 2. Resist the urge to complain about people you don't like
Even if you want to make a fuss, but the result will be alienating others. It could be that the person you're talking to turns out to be friends with the person you don't like, or your friend is tired of hearing you keep saying bad things about other people. If you're constantly complaining about someone, friends and co-workers you spend time with eventually end up wanting to keep your distance.
- Instead of complaining about the person you don't want, it's better not to talk about him or her at all in conversations with other people.
- Only talk about positive things that you enjoy. Otherwise, the person you don't like will take up a lot of your time and energy.
Step 3. Take responsibility for personal words and actions
When you blame someone else for your own negative words and actions, that person will have power over you and slowly let go of your self-control. No matter how upset you are, in the end it is you who decides whether to get angry/frustrated or just ignore it. Your words or actions, even if done in frustration with others, are still your choice and responsibility.
- You are responsible for all your own words and actions. You can't blame someone else for something you said or did, even if you said or did it in anger at someone.
- Try to change your view of him. Thoughts will influence words and actions. So holding back and stopping negative thoughts can make them meaningless.
- Once you learn to ignore him, forget about it. Don't waste your time and energy caring about it in the slightest and stop yourself when you start to remember it.
Part 4 of 4: Attract Positive People into Your Life
Step 1. Know and showcase your best qualities
Positive people are generally attracted to positive people too. If you want to attract positive people into your life, show that you are positive too. Do it gently when you want to show your best qualities.
- Think about what makes you a positive person. Do you respect others or are you kind, for example?
- Make an earnest effort to engage in positive activities more often, not just because you want to be seen by others, but to cultivate a more positive lifestyle for yourself.
- Let your actions be a testament to what your personality is and what your life is like.
Step 2. Identify and look for positive people already in your life
There must be strong and positive people. When you distance yourself from the person you don't want, replace him with the person you want. Be positive and love the people closest to you because they can be good friends and help influence you to be better.
- Think of friends, family, and coworkers who are always positive when faced with adversity. You should also think about who is the kindest, most caring, and loving person in your life.
- Contact those people. Spend more time with them and invite them to social events so you can spend as much time with them as possible.
Step 3. Find and spend time with positive new friends
In addition to being with people already in your life, look for new, positive people to make friends with. Finding new people who are positive and loving will strengthen your social circle with people you like and want. It will also help you become a better friend and more likeable by others.
- Look for positive people in gyms, religious groups, outdoor clubs (such as nature groups), and places where positive people usually go.
- Do volunteer activities. You will feel happy when you do this and at the same time you can meet other people who care about the same problem (who are usually positive and caring people).
- Spending time together for coffee or lunch, even for a short time, can improve your mood and attitude.
- Be proactive. If they find themselves busy, just call and schedule an appointment when you both have some free time.
Tips
- If you happen to run into someone you don't want in a shop or supermarket, for example, pretend you don't see them. Change walking speed, stop, or turn. If he says hello, just say you're in a hurry and need to go. If all else doesn't work, [be quiet] and don't talk too much.
- Just because you guys are related, doesn't mean you have to allow negative behavior. If he makes you feel bad or he hurts you, you have the right to cut ties politely and respectfully.
- Don't be rude or mean to him. This will not fix what he has done to you and will only make you worse.
Warning
- If you decide to ignore someone for a long period of time, there's a good chance you'll never talk to them again at all. Accept the situation.
- At some point, you may want to get back in touch with the person you've been ignoring to resolve the dispute. Realize that this can be difficult or not worth doing. However, if he or she is someone you can't help but see often (such as family or coworkers), perhaps reconciliation is a must.
- If that person is your abusive partner or boyfriend, ignoring him will only provoke him more and make things worse. Seek professional help and get yourself out of this trouble!
