You can't just get along with anyone. Eventually, you'll meet annoying people at school, work, or public places. Sometimes, it's hard to deal with such a person politely without hurting his feelings. Luckily, there are several techniques you can use to keep the annoying person away, without being mean and hurting their feelings.
Step
Method 1 of 3: Communicating Verbally
Step 1. Define your boundaries
Explain your boundaries for him clearly, but still be polite. These boundaries can stay the same or change depending on the chat or situation at hand. You can give reasons for the boundaries to lessen the hurt he feels, but you don't need to explain the boundaries yourself.
For example, if a classmate keeps interrupting you while studying, you might say, "I don't mean to be rude, but I only have two hours left to study before the test."
Step 2. Ask a friend for help
Sometimes, communicating directly with the person in question is not an option (or it doesn't work). If someone continues to annoy you, try asking a friend for help. Discuss the problem with him and ask him to "help" you when the annoying person comes.
- For example, if you have guests visiting and they often take advantage of your hospitality, make plans with friends to call you at a certain time. He can call you and say, for example, that there is an emergency and he needs your help.
- Keep in mind that this technique may only be tried (or worked) once.
Step 3. Set the chat timeout
Explain the time limit you have to talk to him before he starts the conversation. Tell him about your commitments (and limit your time for them). After that, make sure you follow the commitment.
You could say, for example, “I only have five minutes to chat right now. I'm finishing my assignment before the deadline” to a coworker who often bothers you at work
Step 4. Ignore annoying strangers
The world is never short of rude or annoying people. The best way to deal with annoying strangers is not to respond to them at all. Even if he says something that upsets you, ignore it and focus on yourself.
If someone says something annoying as you walk past them, just keep walking and ignore them
Step 5. Be honest with him
If you have an annoying friend or coworker, it might be a good idea to discuss the problem with him or her. Be as polite as possible and name specific behaviors that upset you and/or others. Make it clear that you don't mean to upset him, but mention that you are aware that he too has problems interacting with other people in your social circle.
You can say, “I hope you're not too offended. When you talk, you often stand too close to other people. Things like that interfere with one's personal space and other people feel uncomfortable about it."
Method 2 of 3: Using Body Language
Step 1. Reduce eye contact
Focus your gaze on something else instead of making eye contact. Usually, people understand the importance of eye contact in a chat. If he picks up on the clue, there's a good chance he'll end the conversation with you.
- Keep your eyes on the computer if you are at your desk.
- Use the phone as a distraction from the annoying person.
Step 2. Try pretending you're tired, sick, or have to go somewhere else
You can force yourself to yawn or blow your nose a few times to make it look more convincing. That way, you can say goodbye and end the chat without offending him. If you don't feel like you can pretend you're sick, just say you have other work to do and you shouldn't be late.
- You can tell him that you're meeting someone (eg at a cafe or restaurant) and that you should leave now.
- If you say, for example, "I haven't been feeling well for the past few days" and blow your nose, there's a good chance he will end the conversation and let you go home.
Step 3. Withdraw from the chat
When you're stuck or standing next to someone who's annoying and trying to start a conversation, step away from them immediately. Make it look like you have to go somewhere. After that, you can say goodbye and end the chat politely.
Step 4. Make him feel uncomfortable
Don't let him feel comfortable in your presence. Don't be too friendly when he visits. You can do this without being overtly rude.
- Don't offer him a place to sit. If there is an empty seat, fill it with your wallet, jacket, or files.
- Don't offer him a cup of coffee or any other drink.
- Make sure you choose a table that is too small to accommodate him so he can't accompany you.
Method 3 of 3: Restricting Contacts
Step 1. Keep interactions brief
Having a long chat with him will only give the impression that you are interested in chatting with him. Therefore, make sure your chats are kept short and not long-winded. Even if you're not being rude, he will "turn" to someone else who can fulfill his desire for attention. If he insists on chatting longer than you'd like, say goodbye and end the conversation.
If you intend to discuss the task in a positive and brief manner, but he immediately starts to talk about something else, you can ask permission to go to the bathroom and end the conversation with him
Step 2. Avoid him as much as possible
If you regularly interact with him, try to avoid him. Don't go to places he is likely to go. Try not to look "attractive" so he doesn't want to be around you. Change your schedule so you don't have to cross paths or see her. You can also choose a different route to class, work, or other places you usually visit.
- If the annoying person is a coworker, try closing the room door so he doesn't disturb you at work.
- Change your lunch time or place to avoid annoying classmates or coworkers.
Step 3. Ignore it
Usually, people like to get attention. Sometimes, negative attention actually gives satisfaction to someone. You can make interactions with them unpleasant if you can ignore them as much as possible. Your attitude makes it clear that you are not interested in interacting with him. You may need to try it a few times, but eventually he will feel bored or confused when he tries to interact with you.
Step 4. Don't respond online
If you deal with him often, he usually has your phone number or adds you as his friend on social media. It is possible that he will feel comfortable contacting you at any time via electronic media. The best way to handle this is not to overreact. You may also not respond at all.
- For example, if he sends a message like “Hi! What's up?" You could reply by saying, for example, "I'm tidying up the yard. Later, yes." If he keeps texting you, it's a good idea to ignore him.
- You can also hide their posts in social media feeds. Open the post and click on the “Unfollow”, “Mute” option, or a button with a similar function.
Tips
- Show persistence. It may take a few "trials" for it to stop bothering you.
- If a certain technique you're trying doesn't work, try another technique.
