You only have 90 seconds, so make a great first impression with other people. Once you make it, that good impression will likely never change. Fortunately, everyone is more or less the same -- if you are enthusiastic and interested in them, they will be enthusiastic and interested in you. But there's a lot more to it than that. Read on from step one below to learn how to make the most of your first 90 seconds with other people.
Step
Part 1 of 3: Using Conversation
Step 1. Show that you are genuinely interested and enthusiastic
It is undeniable, everyone likes individuals who like them. If you can show that you are genuinely interested in the friend you are chatting with and are enthusiastic about listening to what he has to say and meeting him, then you should be able to make a good impression. If you can do this, you can even say bullshit and he won't notice.
How to? Smile, make eye contact, and focus on him. Ask questions, then get active and engage in conversation. They're not physical science and fundamentals (we'll get to the counter-intuitive stuff later). If you show up with good, positive intentions, you should be successful
Step 2. Ask
If not, then how are you going to keep the conversation alive? When chatting with other people, ask about the person you are chatting with. People generally like to talk about themselves. So, being a good listener and interested in what he has to say is one easy way to get people to like him. He'll never realize that he's the one who talks the most when it comes to himself.
On the other hand, make sure you also talk about interesting things about yourself to keep the conversation open and reciprocal. It's a good idea to ask open-ended questions (which can't be answered with a "yes" or "no") and show similarities as well as personality. So instead of just saying "I've been to London too," say "You're new from London? Cool! I used to go there with friends. What did you see there?”
Step 3. Praise him
The easiest and quickest way to get people to like them in almost no time is to compliment them. We've all experienced times where even a small compliment can make our day. Just make sure that the compliment is genuine. Saying “Eee, your teeth color is great,” will not win you over.
- Compliment what she's wearing or wearing ("The dress is gorgeous; it really suits you.") or what she's been up to ("The shoe ties are cool. Looks like you can try.") This method works because it's usually hard to hate someone saying the wrong thing. good to you.
- This tactic needs to be combined with other tactics if you want to be with this person for more than 90 seconds. Imagine if you had a friend whose job was to just compliment you all the time. In the end you won't believe what he says. So, in the long run, use this trick only to complement all your interactions with it.
Step 4. Know and remember the name
If you're meeting someone for the first time, you should know their name in 90 seconds, and you can spend the remaining 89 seconds making a good impression. Remember and use the name. When parting, say goodbye but make sure you use his name to make it feel more familiar. "Nice to meet you Grace. Hopefully we'll meet again later."
Dale Carnegie said that a person's name is the most beautiful sound to the owner of that name, no matter what language. So, remember and use the name. The effect will be very good for you and your relationship with the person
Step 5. Emit positive vibes
When talking, talk about good and positive things. Good and positive things are more pleasant to hear than negative things. Discuss your hobbies, hobbies, and special interests. Don't insult anything or talk about things you don't like, because if you only have 90 seconds and need to make a great first impression, you don't want to be seen as a negative or pessimistic person in life.
- Yes, being sympathetic is a great method of building a relationship, but it doesn't have to be used in the first place. Save this method when you have started to get to know and close to the other person. Be positive first before showing your negative side.
- To ensure that you stay positive, avoid bragging. So when the other person says "Yeah, I just got back from London," don't reply with "Oh really? I also just got back from Paris AND Madrid!” This is not a contest or a race. You should be honored to have the opportunity to talk to him, not want him to respect you.
Step 6. Speak the language
In the book “How to Get People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less,” Nicholas Boothman talks about “speaking another person’s language.” He says that most people are either visual, kinesthetic, or auditory, and adapting to the person you're talking to will make you look like him, making your interactions more effective, and ultimately more likable. If you focus on whatever aspect he has, you'll be in a relationship with him in no time.
Indeed, the impression is abstract. The easiest example is to see how he says "I understand". For example, if he says “imagined”, he may be more visually inclined. If he uses hand gestures, he may be kinesthetic
Step 7. Ask for help
Yes, you read it right. This is known as the Benjamin Franklin effect. Ask someone to do something and they will like you even more. Maybe you think this is upside down, but you are wrong. This is cognitive dissonance and makes him think of you. But indeed, who would have thought there was an easy way.
The idea is that when he does something for you (which he would be willing to do if it was easy and hassle free), his subconscious would think “I just did something for a stranger. Why? Oh, yes, I must like her." It seems clichéd and contrived, but whether we realize it or not, our actions can shape our thoughts and that applies in this way
Step 8. Get to know the world and stand on your own beliefs
No one likes someone who just hitchhikes and follows suit. Take the time to get to know the world you live in. The goal is to make you more valuable in a conversation. By getting to know the world, you can create arguments and feedback that other people value, making you look attractive and memorable.
If your opinion starts to waver, make sure you stick with it. If you are fickle, people may not appreciate you. Humans are attracted to people who believe in themselves and their beliefs. So, don't hesitate! If you like Miley Cyrus, say so. If you hate puppies, explain why. Being honest is a better choice than going along with it
Part 2 of 3: Using Body Language
Step 1. Smile
Smiling will make you appear friendly, approachable, and cheerful. And if you don't know, people are always looking for someone who has all three aspects. No one likes to approach strangers just like that. So, smiling is the first thing you can do to show he has nothing to fear. Even the most confident person will be more convinced to approach other people if he smiles. And, hey, smiling is free and easy to do.
Step 2. Imitate him
Imitate your body position and facial expressions as if you were a mirror. This will subconsciously say that you like the other person or agree with him. Ever been to a rock concert and left feeling happy with 1,000 people? It's because you move and jump to and fro together. The same is true in normal everyday conversation. Even without saying much, you can still feel the bond that exists.
If you do this all the time, you will get caught or get a bad impression. Just do it in the first 90 seconds. Imitate the angle of the body of the other person, place your hands in the same position, and imitate the expression on his face. From there you may feel the exchange of energy that occurs between the two of you
Step 3. Make eye contact
Imagine meeting someone who keeps looking the other way. You might try to stop yourself from waving your hand in his face and saying "hey, I'm here." Don't let other people feel the same way when they talk to you. In other words, make eye contact when speaking. Good eye contact will indicate that you are listening and listening, interested, and fully engaged in the conversation and absorbing everything he has to say. Not making eye contact is usually considered rude.
If you have a problem with this area, try looking at the top of the other person's nose, or look him in the eye only when he is talking and stop when you are talking. You don't have to look at him all the time
Step 4. Post revealing body language
This is important to show that you are polite and respectful to the person you are talking to. If you don't do this, you may come across as rude and unapproachable. For a clearer picture, imagine seeing a person with folded arms and crossed legs, sitting in a corner, with their eyes glued to the iPhone they are holding. Would you approach the person? Would you consider him a likable person? Probably not. So, keep your language and posture as open as possible, even if no one is watching you.
The right axis -- apart from just not folding your arms and keeping your head up -- is to keep listening to what the other person is saying. When your phone rings, ignore it. Show that you are spending your time on him. Don't look at the clock, or look at the computer. Maximize what you are doing with the person in front of you. Your phone isn't going anywhere
Step 5. Use the power of touch
Imagine a coworker saying hello as he walks past your desk. Trust me, you will forget the greeting from him five seconds later. Now, imagine that same coworker walking past your desk and patting you on the shoulder in greeting. Which one feels more genuine and makes you like them more? That's the power of touch.
Now imagine the coworker saying “Hey, how are you?” while patting your shoulder. He combines touch while saying your name and also greets with interest. In no time, you're bound to like that coworker a bit more
Step 6. Make sure your tone, gestures, and words match
This is especially important when you have authority or are seeking a position of authority, such as in the office. But it is also important when you are trying to convince others or even to convey an idea or ideas. Imagine your boyfriend saying “I love you” while gritting his teeth and clenching his fists. Weird, right?
This error is often seen in failed politicians. Not infrequently we see someone say “I am touched to see the younger generation today. I know what's important to them," waving hands, pointing fingers, and frowning. Without realizing it, you must not believe what he said
Part 3 of 3: Keeping Your Attitude
Step 1. Believe in yourself
A weak personality makes people lazy to approach. An arrogant personality seems disgusting and certainly makes people lazy to approach. In the midst of that, what attracts many people's attention the most is self-confidence. So, in the 90 seconds you have, lift your head, puff out your chest, and smile. You can definitely do this, because you are cool and calm. Many people want to be near you.
If the situation calls for it, shake the other person's hand firmly. A weak handshake will make people disinterested in you, especially in a professional context. A strong handshake serves to emphasize your presence, while a weak handshake gives the opposite impression
Step 2. Dress appropriately
People will judge you by first impressions (including clothes). So, make sure you dress appropriately and according to the place and event you are attending. No one likes people wearing home clothes at expensive restaurants or wearing make up in the gym. Like it or not, we have to admit that clothes can shape other people's perceptions of us because they are very easy to identify and make us inevitably judge other people from there. So, dress appropriately according to the place and the occasion.
Think about the little things too. Men may forget how people perceive expensive watches, and women may forget the same when wearing big earrings. Everything you wear, even your shoes, make-up, hairstyle, and jewelry, can be an aspect of how others judge you. So, choose your clothes carefully if you want to have a good first impression
Step 3. Adopt the attitude
It's the same as the "look alike" idea you hear so often. Since people generally like other people who are similar to them and have some things in common (especially if found in the first 90 seconds of meeting), imitating or adopting the other person's attitude is quite effective. So no matter what the attitude is, if you can adapt to it easily, copy it.
In other words, if he likes to roll up his sleeves, roll it up too. If he likes to loosen his tie and pull the tail out of his pants, do that too. If he drinks a large latte from Starbucks, order that too. See all the visual aspects that you can emulate in your own way
Step 4. Don't be afraid to look a little stupid
Jennifer Lawrence is really cool in the Hunger Games movies. But the moment he tripped over a chair while receiving the award, he just got even cooler. So the next time you splatter drink on your clothes because you hear a joke from a friend, take it easy. It can actually be a positive thing if you don't panic. They will react to the stain according to how you react. So, let it go.
Everyone likes it when he knows he's being a real “genuine” person. Because deep down, we are all weird kids who are afraid of being caught doing weird things in front of the teacher. Dare to embarrass yourself (and laugh at it) shows that you are proud to be who you are
Tips
- When you make eye contact with other people, don't stare like a weirdo. Look him in the eye when he says something important or thinks it's important.
- When chatting, talk about general things that don't require a deep personal opinion. If you end up discussing a topic that's too heavy and subjective, it's possible that the person has different beliefs or opinions, and may end up taking longer to get him to like you.
- If you're having a bad day, stay home. Bad moods are hard to shake off and other people may think of you as a negative person if they just met you. Wait until your mood improves and becomes positive.
